This week, we were asked to review The Long Moonlight by our Patron Arrant with nary another word. Such mystery - why was this recommended for the show? Why is this moonlight so very löng?

Many thanks to Arrant for their longtime patronage of the show!

In addition to our usual barnyard language, this episode includes discussion of general fantasy violence/gore.

Our Patron Donnie wrote to us to request Things in Jars saying that neither he nor his wife - nor anyone in their neighborhood book club - was able to finish it, find it enjoyable, or even determine exactly what was happening within the plot. He wanted to know if it was just them or if this book did indeed have a terrible tinge. We were happy to take the case this week and ended up having a lot to discuss in the realms of good, bad, and beyond.

Thank you, Donnie - we very much appreciate your patronage and this recommendation especially!

In addition to our usual barnyard language, this episode includes discussion or mention of: child abduction, decapitation, jarred specimen, surgery, and our non-graphic but ever present ghoul, sexual assault.

This time, our Patron Austin requested that we read Sword Woman by legendary fantasy author Robert E. Howard. We learn that Chris doesn't know how to use a Table of Contents and Paris confesses her fear of reading Howard and potentially inviting the fury of her entire musical subculture.

Our thanks go out to Austin for this recommendation because it was (a) not porn and (b) didn't suck!

This week's review of Millenium University is the product of another of Chris's Amazon Short Reads explorations. Join us this time for some true book sins, like writing out counts for arm stretches, accidentally sentient kitchens, and pacing whiplash!

Listener and friend-of-the-show Charlotte donated Afterlife Love to the show and one look at the cover was enough to secure it a place on the schedule for 2023. This week, we take a trip back to Arizona in 1999 and then onward to all of the etheric and astral planes!

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, this episode includes discussion of: cults, dangerous levels of woo-woo, astral travel, pyramid/MLM schemes, sex, and sexual assault/r*pe.

It's Valentine's Day so we thought, "Why not celebrate with multiple wives?" Friend-of-the-show Tris recommended Tarryn Fisher's The Wives to us after she read it in 2021 and wondered how the ending could've been quite so bad. We're back from our nearly 3 month winter break and re-entry to our 8th year of terrible books was a painful one.

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, today's episode includes discussion or mention of: domestic violence, mental health struggles, miscarriage, misogyny (both internalized and externalized!), & polygamy

It's Paris's birthday today so Chris gave her the gift of skipping this episode! Instead, Mary Parker is here with Chris to discuss their experience reading this novelization of the popular 80s Spielberg film. Even though this book is supposed to be based on Melissa Mathison's screenplay, Kotzwinkle really took some wild "I'm-a-dude-in-the-80s" liberties with her story.

Content Warnings: aliens, government abductions, medical torture, and interspecies MILF longings.

Since the well of terrible Carnacki stories has run dry, the Antiques Freaks are here today with us to read a terrible Sherlock Holmes story! The Adventure of the Creeping Man is less of an adventure and more about young people being upset that older people have sex.

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, this episode includes: mild sexual humor, mention of drugs, and various bad Victorian ideas and opinions.

Happy New Year, listeners! We're starting Season 8 with Pepper's Quest by Felicity Brown at the request of our Patron Dee (that's right, Dee of Antiques Freaks also has Patron rights and boy - do they know how to pick 'em!) These books were created to flesh out the Bella Sara horse toy/video game/trading card universe that you are probably familiar with if you've been to a toy store or near children in the last few decades.