The first thing you notice at the American Psychiatric Association meeting is its size. By conservative estimates, a quarter of the psychiatrists in the United States are packed into a single giant San Francisco convention center, more than 15,000 people.

Being in a crowd of 15,000 psychiatrists is a weird experience. You realize that all psychiatrists look alike in an indefinable way. The men all look balding, yet dignified. The women all look maternal, yet stylish. Sometimes you will see a knot of foreign-looking people huddled together, their nametags announcing them as the delegation from the Nigerian Psychiatric Association or the Nepalese Psychiatric Association or somewhere else very far away. But however exotic, something about them remains ineffably psychiatrist.

The second thing you notice at the American Psychiatric Association meeting is that the staircase is shaming you for not knowing enough about Vraylar®.

Seems kind of weird. Maybe I'll just take the escalator

…no, the escalator is advertising Latuda®, the "number one branded atypical antipsychotic". Aaaaaah! Maybe I should just sit down for a second and figure out what to do next…

AAAAH, CAN'T SIT DOWN, VRAYLAR® HAS GOTTEN TO THE BENCHES TOO! Surely there's a non-Vraylar bench somewhere in this 15,000 person convention center!