What if clutter isn't just about having too much stuff—but about what's quietly pulling us away from the things that matter most to us? In today's episode, I visit with Joshua Becker, bestselling author and founder of Becoming Minimalist, about how clutter affects our lives and our faith.

We explore why change feels so hard, how clutter quietly distracts us from spiritual growth, and why Jesus' teachings on possessions are an invitation—not a burden.

If you've ever felt stuck, distracted, or weighed down by "too much"—this conversation you and give you practical next steps.

Do you ever feel like you're trying to love someone well—but it doesn't seem to be working? Maybe you're putting in effort, but the other person still feels distant, unappreciated, or unexcited about the relationship. In this episode, I talk with Dr. Gary Chapman about why that happens, how love languages go deeper than we often realize, and what actually helps people feel truly loved. Gary gives practical advice for improving all types of relationships.

Have you ever felt like change just isn't possible for you?

In this episode, we talk about the lie "I'll never change"—why it feels so true, where it comes from, and what the Bible says instead. We'll explore how God brings transformation gradually, why slow progress still matters, and how to stay hopeful when growth feels frustrating.

This episode is for anyone who's tired of trying, discouraged by past failure, or quietly wondering if this is just how life will always be.

You'll also have a change to renew your mind about this lie while you're listening to the podcast through Scripture meditation, truth journaling, and the Hopelessness questions from the Renewing of the Mind Project.

Every January, we feel it: fresh starts, new motivation, and the quiet confidence that this year will be different. We make lists, set goals, and imagine a better version of ourselves waiting just around the corner.

And yet, for many of us, a few weeks or months later, we’re right back where we started—discouraged, frustrated, and wondering why change feels so hard.

If you’ve ever told yourself “This year will be different” and then watched nothing really change, this post is for you.

The belief “this year will be different” usually comes from New Year’s euphoria. Everything feels possible. Our goals feel exciting instead of heavy. It’s like standing at an all‑you‑can‑eat buffet of goals—career, health, habits, relationships, spiritual growth—and piling our plates high.

This belief also shows up anytime we start something new:

We assume that because the thing is new, the outcome will be new.

But there’s one thing we forget.

No matter how new the system, plan, or habit is… we bring ourselves into it.

If we approach new goals with the same patterns, the same expectations, and the same mindset we’ve always used, the results won’t change—no matter how fresh the calendar feels.

As the saying (often attributed to Einstein) goes:

“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

So the real truth is this:

This year will only be different if we approach things differently.

Let’s be honest about some common patterns that quietly sabotage our goals.

Many of us create long, impressive goal lists—so long they’re impossible to sustain. The result? We complete the easy or fun goals and ignore the rest. The unfinished goals linger all year, quietly fueling guilt and discouragement.

We assume writing a goal down will magically produce motivation. But willpower is unreliable, especially in areas we’ve never been consistent in before. Expecting sudden willpower is setting ourselves up to fail.

Some goals can be done privately with God alone, but many are easier—and more sustainable—with support. Isolation often makes change heavier than it needs to be.

When change doesn’t come quickly, we interpret struggle as failure. Discouragement sets in, and quitting feels logical—even inevitable.

If we want this year to be different in a real, lasting way, we need to change how we approach change itself.

Instead of a full year packed with resolutions, consider quarterly goals. Shorter time frames make goals feel more realistic and manageable.

A helpful structure:

Less is often more.

Most meaningful goals require both:

Practically:

Spiritually:

Scripture reminds us that transformation happens through the renewing of the mind—not just trying harder.

Lasting change is a process. You will fail along the way. That doesn’t mean you’re incapable—it means you’re human.

Failure becomes destructive only when we let it lead to quitting. With God’s help, failure can become feedback instead of a verdict.

Support matters. Whether it’s a local group, an online community, or structured accountability, having others alongside you lightens the load.

That said, the most consistent support comes from walking closely with God—talking honestly with Him, renewing your mind, and persevering together.

The goal isn’t instant transformation. The goal is faithful perseverance.

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” — Galatians 6:9

Your future self will thank you—not for being perfect, but for not giving up. More than that, the journey itself draws you closer to God, who is ultimately in charge of the results.

This year can be different—but not because the calendar changed.

It will be different because you approached it differently, with honesty, wisdom, and God’s help.

If you’d like help with a difficult goal—so that this year really can be different— my online course will help. In addition to on-demand videos and practical, hands-on assignments, I’ll also be hosting some online “work parties” in January of 2026 for those enrolled in the class to work on your hard-to-make-yourself-do goals! Click on the image below for more info.

The post Lie: This Year Will Be Different… Right? appeared first on Barb Raveling.

If you've ever started a new year full of hope only to feel discouraged weeks later, this episode is for you. We unpack the belief "this year will be different," why it usually doesn't work, and what actually helps change stick. You'll hear practical ideas, spiritual perspective, and encouragement for taking a slower, wiser, and more grace-filled approach to your goals this year.

Full show notes and links at barbraveling.com.

A couple of months ago, I sent out a survey asking which lies people struggle with the most—today’s lie came in #1: “It shouldn’t be this hard to change.”  The next two? “I’ll never change” and “I can’t do this anyway, so why bother?”

What’s interesting is that those second two lies come after repeated failure. But today’s lie—“It shouldn’t be this hard to change”—actually causes the failure.

Why? Because if we believe change should be easy, we won’t put in the work required for real transformation. Let’s dig into this idea and replace the lie with biblical truth.

This lie shows up most often when we’re trying to break a habit—but typically only at the very beginning of the journey. Once you’ve worked on change long enough, you learn (from experience!) that change is supposed to be hard. But if you’re new to the process or haven’t seen much progress yet, you’re far more likely to believe the lie, It shouldn’t be this hard to change.

So where does this belief come from?

We live in a world that constantly tells us: Buy this product. Start this program. Take this course. It will be easy! Marketing promises quick, effortless transformation. That seeps into our thinking, so we assume change should just “happen”—no struggle, no sacrifice. It shouldn’t be hard to change…

Sometimes, in the church, we unintentionally absorb the belief that spiritual growth should be easy, too—almost effortless. We think if we go to church, join a Bible study, or attend a small group, we’ll naturally glide into spiritual maturity.

But that’s not how the Bible describes transformation. It uses words like training, fighting, resisting, disciplining, and battling.

Real change takes intentional effort, spiritual weapons, and daily engagement with God.

Many of us think trying our hardest means “showing up,” like my husband did one day in high school when he told his mom he got a C on a test.

“Well, you tried your best,” she said—except he hadn’t studied at all. Lesson learned? That effort meant simply being present. But effort is more than that, especially in spiritual growth.

Breaking a stronghold, uprooting a generational sin, rewiring long-held thought patterns, or resisting a habit you’ve practiced for decades—all of that is hard work.

If someone told you to run a marathon in six months, you wouldn’t think, “I’ll just show up that day.” You’d know it required effort, planning, discipline, and sacrifice. Yet we rarely apply that same mindset to our spiritual or emotional habits—even though the Bible clearly portrays transformation as a spiritual battle.

If I’m trying to change a stronghold, a generational sin, a long-term habit, or a behavior fueled by years of thinking, it will be extremely hard—and that’s completely normal.

Hard doesn’t mean impossible. Hard doesn’t mean God isn’t with you. Hard doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. Hard simply means you’re fighting a real battle.

Hebrews 12 is a perfect picture of this struggle. It reminds us that resisting sin is painful, that discipline doesn’t feel good in the moment, and that even Jesus sweat drops of blood in His fight against temptation.

But it also reminds us that discipline produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those trained by it (Hebrews 12:11).

That harvest is coming—if we don’t give up.

When it comes to working hard on growth in the areas God wants us to change, that hard work looks like lots of renewing our mind—multiple times a day. 

Towards the end of the podcast episode, I share some different ways to renew your mind for the lie, It shouldn’t be this hard to change. I give an example for Scripture meditation, truth journaling, and using the Tired of the Struggle questions from my book, Renewing of the Project.

Here are the truths I shared in the podcast as examples of what you could write down when you’re truth journaling the lie, It shouldn’t be this hard to change. The last truth is a truth journal entry from my 2002 journal! :

Belief: It shouldn’t be this hard to change.

Truths:

Listen to the podcast for more insights and to renew your mind along with me!

If you have a friend who is struggling with change in some area of their lives, please share this post or podcast episode with them.

The post Lie: It Shouldn’t Be This Hard to Change appeared first on Barb Raveling.

If you've ever thought "it shouldn't be this hard to change," this episode will encourage you. In today's episode of the Christian Habits Podcast, we'll look at where this lie comes from, why real change feels so difficult, and what the Bible says about transformation. I'll also walk you through practical questions you can use to renew your mind and find hope in your struggle.

Do you ever feel like your desires are calling the shots in your daily decisions? In this episode, we tackle the lie: "I want this… so I should have it." We'll look at why desire can't be your decision-maker, how culture feeds this mindset, and what Scripture says about living by design instead of impulse. As you listen, you'll have a chance to renew your mind and learn practical ways to say no to the habits that keep pulling you off track.

Have you ever wondered how to study the Bible in a way that actually feels approachable—and even enjoyable? In this episode of the Christian Habits Podcast, I had the joy of sitting down with Ellen Krause, Ashley Armijo, and Taylor Mitchell—the inspiring mother-daughter team behind the Coffee and Bible Time ministry—to talk about their new book, The Easy Bible Study Method.

These three women are passionate about helping others connect with God through Scripture in a simple, grace-filled way. Whether you’re brand new to Bible study or have struggled with consistency, this conversation is packed with encouragement and practical tools that can help you develop a quiet time that fits your life and strengthens your faith.

This conversation is a gentle reminder that Bible study doesn’t have to be complicated or intimidating. When we approach God’s Word with open hearts and simple tools, we find joy, peace, and the life-changing presence of Jesus—right in the middle of our busy, everyday lives.

Listen to the full episode on the Christian Habits Podcast!

ASHLEY ARMIJO is cofounder of Coffee and Bible Time, a ministry that helps women learn how to delight in God’s Word and thrive in Christian living. She is an alumna of the Moody Bible Institute with a Bachelor of Science in Integrated Ministry Studies. It is Ashley’s passion to teach women how to study and delight in God’s Word whether that is online through Coffee and Bible Time or opening up her home to young women in the community.

ELLEN KRAUSE aka Mentor Mama, is cofounder of Coffee and Bible Time with daughters Ashley and Taylor. She hosts the CBT Podcast, which equips people to delight in God’s Word and thrive in Christian Living! Ellen has been involved in women’s ministry for over 20 years and mentors women worldwide through CBT. Her MA in marketing and her years in corporate America help CBT flourish.

TAYLOR MITCHELL is cofounder of Coffee and Bible Time. She holds a bachelor’s degree in pre-counseling and has devoted herself to extensive academic and personal study of the Bible. She is passionate about helping women apply biblical principles to their everyday lives, guiding them to grow closer to God through His Word. With a deep commitment to integrating spiritual and mental health, Taylor encourages women to embrace their true selves and feel fully loved.

The post How to Develop a Consistent Quiet Time – Interview with Coffee and Bible Time appeared first on Barb Raveling.