Is it wrong for a Christian to dress fashionably? This topic has come up between Fran and her friends, Jeff and Lois.

They attended church together yesterday and after lunch a conversation ensued about the young woman who sang a solo. While Fran thought her outfit was a bit too short and somewhat distracting while she sang, she attributed it to today's fashion scene. However, Jeff made a comment that it was hard for a man to keep his mind on worship when a woman was on the platform dressed like that.

After Lois and Jeff left that afternoon, Fran gave it some more thought. “Women are not responsible for how men think,” she says out loud to herself. “They can’t blame us just because their minds wander so easily.” And she begins to feel a bit defensive about this Christian dress code idea.

Now it's Monday morning and Fran decides to wear her new midnight blue suit. She loves it and she has an important presentation today, so it's a good time to break it in. And as she puts it on, she feels really—well—really pretty. As she zips up the skirt, her eye catches her reflection in the mirror. She realizes her new skirt is as short as the soloist's in church yesterday.

That same uneasy feeling comes over her. "Fran, if her skirt was too short, what about yours?" That still, quiet voice is clear in her head.

"Lord," Fran feels defensive, "it's impossible to find anything these days that isn't short. Besides, this is not nearly as short as some of them. What's wrong with it anyway? I mean, what's wrong with legs? We all have them!"

Fran’s reaction is a clear indication that she is convicted and trying to defend herself. She knows her reaction is wrong. However, she is not ready to admit defeat.

She remembers what Lois said—about godly women having higher standards of dress than other women. That doesn’t sit well with Fran.

"I don’t think just because you're a Christian woman, you have to wear skirts to the floor and collars to your neck and look like a Pilgrim!” she hears herself say.

Fran recognizes that her reaction and the anger she feels about this issue is a sure indication that she’s under conviction from God’s Spirit. She knows she needs to take a step back and rethink all this, because when her spirit is this disturbed, something’s wrong.

But it’s time to go to work so, she heads for the car with the kids. This whole issue of how a woman should dress really upsets her. Why? she wonders to herself. Why am I so bent out of shape over this?

Is it wrong for a Christian to dress fashionably? This topic has come up between Fran and her friends, Jeff and Lois. They attended church together yesterday and after lunch a conversation ensued about the young woman who sang a...

It's time to once again catch up with our friend, Fran, to find out how things are in her life. Periodically I continue this ongoing story of a fictional woman named Fran who is learning how to practice the presence of Jesus in her everyday life. Fran has been through a lot—the death of her husband, going back to work, struggling with many issues as a single working mom.

Today Fran is in church, as she is each Sunday, with a couple who is visiting her from out of town. She has known Lois and Jeff for many years and is glad their friendship has continued even after Jim’s death.

Just before the pastor's sermon, a young woman gets up to sing a solo. She has a lovely voice and the music is well done. But Fran can't help noticing how inappropriately dressed she is for a church service, particularly because she is on the platform. Her skirt is short, her top is tight—it just doesn’t seem appropriate. In fact, Fran is embarrassed by it, and so she just looks down at her bulletin.

After church, they go back to her home for Sunday lunch, and with the kids outside playing, she has some leisurely time with Jeff and Lois. Jeff says, “I really enjoyed your pastor’s sermon, Fran. I can see why you like your church.”

“Thanks, Jeff,” Fran replies. “That was the first time I’ve heard that soloist. I think she’s new in the church. I also think she needs some coaching about appropriate dress for church.”

Lois remarks, “You know, in our church we finally had to establish a dress code for anyone taking part in the service. It became a real issue. So now, the rules are that if you’re on the platform for any reason, women must wear skirts below the knee or dress pants and no tight clothing. And men must wear dress pants—no blue jeans. Some people objected, but it was getting out of control.”

“I like that idea,” Fran says. “I mean, we should have some respect for the Lord’s house and a worship service.”

Jeff remarks, "Speaking for men, I find it difficult to stay focused on worship when a woman is dressed—well—like that girl today.”

“I noticed you kept your head down, Jeff,” Fran says.

“Well,” he replies, “I find the best solution is just don’t look.”

“But you know,” Fran says, “that’s the fashion today. Everywhere you shop that’s what you see.”

Lois replies, “But women of God are called to higher standards, don’t you agree?”

What do you think?

It’s time to once again catch up with our friend, Fran, to find out how things are in her life. Periodically I continue this ongoing story of a fictional woman named Fran who is learning how to practice the presence...

We all love parties—those festive occasions when we celebrate something special. But have you ever planned a party that turned out to be a bust? Nobody showed up or the food was terrible or a fight broke out? Well, if you've ever had a pity party, then you know how miserable they can be. Pity parties are pitiful!

Read this passage from Hebrews 12:1:

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us."

It dawned on me that one of the most common things that hinders and entangles believers and keeps us from running our race is self-pity. I believe the enemy has this flaming arrow honed to perfection, and many of us are very vulnerable to self-pity.

For example, often single people throw pity parties because they're not married. Or how about those times we've felt sorry for ourselves because we received unfair treatment on our jobs. And then there's this famous reason for a pity party: We were accused of something of which we were not guilty.

And I think we've had a few pity parties because we didn't get the credit we think we deserved. Or would you admit with me that you've thrown a pity party or two because someone said something that hurt your feelings? It really doesn't take much for us to get a pity party going! Any flimsy excuse will do!

Think of how the enemy uses self-pity in our lives. When we are feeling sorry for ourselves, what are some of the usual outcomes?

Almost always, pity parties cause us to waste time. Now, just think about it: When you're feeling sorry for yourself, you usually waste a lot of time thinking about how you've been wronged, how you don't deserve what's happened to you, how bad things are. Pity parties take a lot of time away from other important activities.

I remember years ago getting home one evening and I was sorely tempted to throw a pity party because my boss had hurt my feelings that day. I had planned to get some work done that night, but instead I started to feel sorry for myself. I sat down in my favorite chair and decided, "I'm not going to do anything tonight; I have a right to just do nothing. After all, I really have it hard at work.”

Then it dawned on me what was happening: The enemy was trying to keep me from doing profitable things by tempting me to throw a pity party. So, I said—out loud—to the enemy, "Not tonight; no sir, I'm not throwing a pity party tonight.” And I just refused to wallow in that self-pity. Believe me, that was a change in the way I had often dealt with hurt feelings. But I just wasn't going to let the enemy waste my time through a pity party. And it was a major change point in my life, because it was the first time I realized that I can refuse to throw a pity party if I choose to. And I remember thinking that I just didn’t want to be miserable.

2. Not only do pity parties waste our time, they also waste our energy. Self-pity just drains you. It is, of course, a very emotional reaction, and you spend a lot of emotional energy when you are feeling sorry for yourself. That means you don't have energy for other things that are important. So, again, pity parties keep you from doing what you should do because you don't have any energy left after throwing that pity party.

3. Have you noticed this? When you throw a pity party, your imagination runs wild. You start thinking about what someone has done or what has happened, and it grows in importance. In your mind it becomes a lot worse than it really is. You lose your perspective. That, of course, causes you to over-react to it.

4. And in that over-reaction, what often happens is that relationships are damaged. When feelings are hurt and we're feeling sorry for ourselves, we often say and do things that hurt others.

We all love parties—those festive occasions when we celebrate something special. But have you ever planned a party that turned out to be a bust? Nobody showed up or the food was terrible or a fight broke out? Well, if...

One of the most important challenges you face each day is how are you going to spend those twenty-four hours? Will you be able to look back and say, “Well done” as you recognize that you truly implemented good time management principles that day?

This is time management principle number five:

5. Time Management and motivation go hand in hand.

They feed off of each other. Here’s how that works. When you are managing your time effectively, getting things done and enjoying the results, it motivates you to keep on managing time well, to improve your time management skills. And isn’t it also true that when you’re really motivated to get a job done, you do a much better job of managing your time.

I’ve learned in my own life that when I get one discipline going well, it motivates me to put other disciplines in place because I am benefiting from the fruit of being disciplined. So, the discipline of time management will feed your motivation to get things done, reach some of your goals and realize the satisfaction that comes when you do. Time management and motivation go hand in hand.

I often talk about going back to the basics, and as a Christ-follower, a basic is that you need to spend regular and quality time getting to know God better and better—through time in his Word and prayer, fellowship and worship. It’s a basic that will never change and nothing can replace it. The same is true with this basic of time management. No matter how good your skills are, how smart you are, how talented you are, if you don’t learn to be a good time manager, you’ll never enjoy the full scope of what God has created you to do. I encourage you to keep these five principles we’ve talked about in mind:

Time management is about balance and prioritization.

Time management is about getting the right stuff done.

It is essential for your success.

It is learning to be present in the moment.

Time management and motivation go hand in hand.

If you would like to read the entire week’s message, click here to view/download the PDF.

One of the most important challenges you face each day is how are you going to spend those twenty-four hours? Will you be able to look back and say, “Well done” as you recognize that you truly implemented good time...

Do you know someone that never seems to be with you even when he or she is with you? It’s a bit disconcerting, isn’t it? I’ve been sharing five principles of time management—attitudes toward the value of your time and...

Do you know someone that never seems to be with you even when he or she is with you? It’s a bit disconcerting, isn’t it?

I’ve been sharing five principles of time management—attitudes toward the value of your time and managing it well and here is principle number four:

4. Time management is being present in the moment.

Here’s what I mean. If you’re in a meeting or a conversation with others, whether business or personal, and you’re paying attention and focused on what’s being said or decided or asked, that means that you’re making good use of that time.

I think of a Pastor in my church who has many responsibilities—many balls in the air all the time. But when I’m in a meeting with him, discussing whatever issues I need to have his input, he is totally with me in that conversation, for however long we need. He is present in the moment, as though this is the most important thing on his calendar for that day—which it probably is not!

Another friend on the board of The Christian Working Woman is a very successful lawyer with that same wonderful characteristic. Steve is totally present in the moment, never letting his mind go to other issues while he’s talking to you. No doubt that is a trait that has contributed to his success, but it also is a time-saving habit. You eliminate mis-communication, additional conversations, and other time-consuming things because you’re present in the moment

This is an attitude that we can all develop. It does not come naturally for me but I’m becoming more and more aware of its importance, and therefore more intentional about being present in the moment with the people in my life. It not only will save you time it will improve your relationships. It’s a dynamite characteristic to develop.

In Ecclesiastes wise Solomon wrote: Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might (Ecclesiastes 9:10a). Do what is right and do it to the very best of your ability. Have you ever prayed about being a better time manager? Why not? As you ask for help, the Holy Spirit will bring things to your mind throughout your day—reminding you of the importance of managing your time wisely. It makes a difference for now and for eternity.