The Compound Commitment

Episode 55: 

Episode 054: In this episode, Rhiannon and I explore two timeless principles that shaped my career as a strength coach and continue to influence how we raise our kids: resistance and growth.

In the weight room, too little resistance makes an athlete weaker, while too much can overwhelm or injure them. Parenting works much the same way. Our challenge is to meet each child where they are, provide the right amount of resistance, and allow them to work through difficult experiences without taking over.

We share some honest examples of times we may have pushed our kids too hard, made life too easy, or disagreed about the best way to help them grow. We also discuss why growth is never a straight line, how strength can fade when we stop practicing it, and why comparing siblings to one another can rob us of the opportunity to appreciate their individual progress.

We certainly don’t have parenting figured out, but these principles have helped us become more intentional about preparing our kids for real life—and reminding ourselves that every person is on their own growth curve.

Episode 053: How do we make good decisions when there are endless options and no obvious right answer?

In this episode, Rhiannon and I unpack the PST process—principles, strategies, and techniques—the most powerful and useful decision-making framework I’ve ever applied to my life. I first learned it through my strength & conditioning mentor, Gary Gray, and it helped me stop chasing the newest exercises and start anchoring my decisions to the principles behind them.

We explain how principles give us a foundation, strategies provide direction, and techniques give us the flexibility to respond to different people, seasons, and circumstances. We also explore the difference between universal truths and the values that are personal to each family, and how a strategy such as family vacations can be used intentionally to strengthen relationships.

Rhiannon shares why the language of PST confused and frustrated her for years—and why she eventually discovered that the framework wasn’t as rigid as it initially sounded. Once we understood it together, it gave us a shared language for evaluating our choices and asking a better question: Does this decision strengthen what matters most to us?

This is the same framework I’ve used in training, parenting, relationships, and money—and the framework I used to build the Legacy Loop.

Episode 052: What if the greatest gift we can give our kids isn’t an easier life, but the right amount of resistance to help them grow?

In this episode, Rhiannon and I explore the inheritance trap—the danger of allowing money to remove the challenges that build confidence, work ethic, gratitude, and purpose. We reflect on the seasons when we had less, why working toward something can be more meaningful than finally getting it, and how difficult it is as parents to watch our kids struggle when we have the ability to help.

We also discuss how both too much and too little financial support can weaken the next generation. Using college as an example, we wrestle with how to help our kids without removing their responsibility or forcing them to carry unnecessary burdens alone.

Ultimately, we stopped asking, “How much money should we leave our kids?” and began asking a better question: “What do we want our money to strengthen?” That shift is helping us think more intentionally about using money to strengthen our kids, their relationships, and the values we hope will continue for generations.

Episode 051: In this episode, Rhiannon and I look back at the dreams we wrote down when we had very little money—and the fun we had watching many of them come true. 

We talk about our 101-goal lists, traveling to places we had never been, my early Save/Invest/Give coffee cans, and eventually building the dream house we had pictured for years.

But achieving that dream left us with an unexpected question: Now what are we saving for?

We explore why money should never become the goal, how dreaming can create incredible memories, and why enjoying life today and building something meaningful for tomorrow don’t have to compete. The deeper question isn’t simply what we want to accomplish or acquire—it’s what we want our money to strengthen.

This conversation ultimately sets the stage for an even harder question: If struggle helped us grow, how much of it should we remove from our children’s lives?

Episode 050: How do we give our kids a great life without taking away the struggle, desire, and gratitude that helped shape us?

In this episode, Rhiannon and I look back at some of the decisions we wrestled with while raising our kids—from battery-powered cars and expensive shoes to chores, allowances, and family experiences. We share the choices we made, the ones we still question, and the tension between giving our kids opportunities and giving them everything they want.

These stories helped us recognize why our family needed the Legacy Loop. Most financial decisions aren’t really about money—they’re about what we want to strengthen in the lives of the people we love. We may not get every decision right, but a clear vision can help us use money as a tool instead of allowing it to quietly become the goal.

Episode 049: What happens when money quietly shifts from being a tool to becoming the goal?

In this episode, Rhiannon and I look back at a season when our lives became focused on building—buying our first fourplex, adding rental properties around Gonzaga, starting businesses, working multiple jobs, and trying to create financial security for our future family. What started as an exciting challenge eventually taught me an important lesson: if you don't know what money is for, it's hard to know when you have enough.

We share the fun, the resistance, the risks, and a few of our favorite memories from those years—including Rhiannon's reaction when I wanted to use our house savings to buy a fourplex, the scary basement she refused to enter, managing dozens of college renters, and finally buying the home where we would begin raising our family.

I don't regret those years of working, learning, and building. But looking back, I wish I had understood sooner that money was never supposed to be the destination. It was a tool to help us build the life that mattered to us.

And that sets up the question we'll wrestle with next: What is money for once you have kids?

Episode 048: What if the most important career decision you make has nothing to do with money? 

In this episode, Rhiannon and I continue our journey from college into the early years of marriage—when we were chasing purpose long before we were chasing wealth. 

We look back on everything from my surprise marriage proposal at Gonzaga, to the uncertainty of tearing my Achilles before graduation, to moving across the world so I could pursue my dream of playing professional basketball in Germany. Those years were filled with unknowns, setbacks, and plenty of moments where we had no idea what came next. But they also became some of the most meaningful years of our lives. 

We share what it was like living in Germany with one space heater, a handful of DVDs, and very little money. Rhiannon talks about how teaching at an international school helped her discover a new calling, while I share how falling in love with strength and conditioning eventually became a bigger dream than basketball itself. 

We also revisit one of the most difficult seasons of our marriage—returning home after my basketball opportunity unexpectedly disappeared, living in my parents' basement, working temporary jobs, and trying to figure out what our future would look like. Looking back, we realize those weren't detours. They were preparing us for everything that came after. 

In this episode, we discuss: 

• Why pursuing meaningful work was more important than chasing the biggest paycheck. 
• How setbacks often become the turning points that shape our future. 
• What living in Germany taught us about gratitude, simplicity, and marriage. 
• Why shared struggles often strengthen relationships more than shared successes. 
• How the right amount of resistance helped shape our marriage and our future. 

One of the biggest lessons from this conversation is that purpose isn't always found on a straight path. Sometimes it's uncovered through disappointment, uncertainty, and the doors that unexpectedly close. 

Those early years didn't make us wealthy. They made us stronger. 

Next Episode: When Money Became the Goal — As our careers began to take off, we found ourselves making smart financial decisions, buying rental properties, and building businesses. But somewhere along the way, I slowly stopped asking what money was for and started measuring success by how much I could accumulate. That shift changed everything—and ultimately became one of the biggest lessons behind the Legacy Loop. 

Episode 047: Some of our favorite memories came during the years when we had the least amount of money.

In this episode, Rhiannon and I look back on our college years, sharing the stories that shaped the way we think about money, parenting, and legacy today. We laugh about stretching every dollar, hunting for the best deals, living on cheap meals, and discovering that creativity and friendship often flourished because we didn't have much.

We also revisit some of our biggest financial mistakes. Rhiannon shares the story of opening her first credit card and the lessons she learned from debt. I talk about running out of money for rent in college and the embarrassment of facing my landlord every week until I could finally pay him back. Looking back, neither of us would choose those moments again—but we also wouldn't trade what they taught us.

That leads us to one of the biggest questions we've wrestled with as parents:

If some of our greatest lessons came from not having enough money, how do we give our kids opportunities without taking away the experiences that build character?

Throughout the conversation, we explore why some lessons can be taught while others have to be lived, why mistakes are an essential part of growth, and how our job as parents isn't to eliminate resistance but to provide the right amount at the right time.

We also begin sharing how these experiences eventually led us to create the Legacy Loop—a framework that helps us think less about how much money to give and more about how money can strengthen our family.

In this episode, we discuss:

 - Why some of our happiest memories came from having very little money.
 - The financial mistakes that taught us lessons we'll never forget.
 - Why pain is often one of life's greatest teachers.
 - The challenge of helping our kids without preventing them from growing.
 - How the Principle of Resistance applies to money, parenting, and life.
 - Why asking better questions leads to better financial decisions.

This episode is about much more than college memories. It's about discovering that wealth isn't measured by what we own—it's measured by who we're becoming.

Next Episode: Chasing Purpose Before Money — We continue our journey from college into early marriage, professional basketball in Germany, and the beginning of my career as a strength coach at Gonzaga. Before money ever became a goal, we were simply chasing meaningful work—and those years shaped the foundation for everything that followed.

Episode 046:  When I first got married, I thought the best partner would be someone who agreed with me, made life easier, and saw the world the same way I did.

Twenty-five years later, I've learned the opposite is true.

In this episode, Rhiannon and I share how our differences have become one of the greatest strengths in our marriage, our family, and even the book we're writing together, What Is Money For?

I'm an internal processor who loves building systems and organizing ideas. Rhiannon is an external processor who asks tough questions, challenges my thinking, and helps uncover blind spots I never would have seen on my own. Those conversations haven't always been easy, but they've made our relationship—and the ideas behind the Legacy Loop—far stronger than either of us could have created alone.

We also talk about something every family faces: how much of our parents' influence we should carry into our own marriage. While we're incredibly grateful for everything our families taught us, we've learned that every couple has to create their own story, their own values, and their own way of using money to strengthen the people they love.

In this episode, we discuss:

 - Why healthy resistance strengthens relationships.
 - How different communication styles have become one of our greatest assets.
 - Why families should write their story instead of repeating previous generation's.
 - How the Principle of Resistance applies to marriage, parenting, & family legacy.
 - Why the best conversations often produce the strongest ideas.

This episode isn't really about communication—it's about growth. Because the people who challenge us the most are often the people who help us become our best.

Next Episode: The Struggle Money Can't Buy — We look back on our college years and early marriage, sharing how having very little money created some of our favorite memories and shaped the way we're thinking about raising our own kids as Carter heads off to college.