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So the episode title is courtesy of ChatGPT and proof that AI is not going to replace us - yet.
What?
Anyway here's more AI slop. I didn't see the episode 117 but I'm on holiday so I am doing it later.
No AI slop shownotes (as is now tradition) because I did this edit in two parts. But basically Jack sees off his mate Denis Ryan who listeners will know was a Ballarat detective who fought the church to stop child sex offending and was harshly punished for his good deeds. We also look at the idiots saying the Minnesota assassinations were 'left wing violence'. We discuss the relevance of cookers which brings us right to Monica's latest grift - the hollow and pointless private prosecution of Dan Andrews. And then we have SovCits, MAGA paedos and BABET!
Big week folks. Enjoy!
This episode of "The Two Jacks," with Jack the Insider and Hong Kong Jack, covers a range of topics including the struggles of free-to-air television in Australia, the proposed superannuation tax on high balances, the complexities of housing affordability and development approvals, and the political landscape in the United States, particularly regarding immigration and the actions of the Trump administration. They also touch on the passing of author Frederick Forsyth, the controversial Gaza Freedom Flotilla with Greta Thunberg, and lighter topics like the "Dull Men's Club" and AFL updates.
Timestamped Events:
This episode of 'The Two Jacks' features Jack the Insider and Hong Kong Jack discussing a range of topics. A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to the story of former Victoria Police detective Denis Ryan and his fight for justice against clerical abuse, detailed in the book Unholy Trinity. They also touch upon Australian and international politics, including sectarianism, the current state of the Labor and Green parties, the situation in Tasmania, and US and UK politics with commentary on Elon Musk, the Democrats, and Sir Keir Starmer. The episode concludes with a discussion on sports, specifically AFL, NRL, and cricket.
PS - THESE SHOWNOTES ARE AI GENERATED
AI slop shownotes. This one gets spicy on Israel and Palestine!
Podcast Episode: Two Jacks – Episode 114
Post-Production for Recording 1
Run Date: 30 May 2025
ShownotesIntroduction (0:00)
United Kingdom:
Poland:
United States:
Australian Rules Football (AFL):
Rugby:
Soccer:
Cricket:
State of Origin Rugby League:
Thank you for tuning in to Two Jacks!
Email Jack the Insider: [email protected]
Subscribe to Hong Kong Jack on Substack for updates!
In this episode of The Two Jacks, Jack the Insider and Hong Kong Jack tackle the latest in Australian politics, global media developments, and international affairs. It's a fast-paced discussion of the political landscape, leadership upheavals, cabinet shakeups, pressing policies, and more. Tune in for sharp observations and witty takes!
Key Topics CoveredHave feedback, questions, or topics you’d like covered in a future episode? Reach out:
Join us for Episode 113 of The Two Jacks for bold takes, sharp critiques, and a few laughs along the way!
MORE UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY AI SLOP SHOWNOTES. Peter Hoistead? Thanks Gemini.
Thanks listeners. We love you. Buy CBCo it's excellent beer.
The Conditional Release Program - Episode 185: Federal Election 2025 Post-Special
Hosts: Joel Hill & Jack the Insider (Peter Hoistead)
Overall Theme: A deep dive into the results and implications of the 2025 Australian Federal Election, focusing on Labor's historic victory, the Coalition's catastrophic loss, and the performance of minor parties and independents.
Key Segments & Talking Points:
(Part 1 - Approximate Timestamps based on original transcript, subject to adjustment)
(Part 2 - Timestamps restart from 00:00:00 but are a continuation, add ~1 hour 36 mins 50 secs to these for continuous flow)
More AI notes for y'all. They're not bad!
Episode Link: Find this and other episodes at The Conditional Release Program on RedCircle.
Recorded: May 5, 2025 (two days after the Australian Federal Election)
Hosts: Jack the Insider & Hong Kong Jack
In this episode, The Two Jacks dissect the stunning Australian federal election results, explore a surprising political turnaround in Canada, ponder the next Pope, and touch on global political shifts from the UK to Germany, and the latest from Trump's America.
(00:00:00) Introduction & Australian Election: An Orderly Affair Jack the Insider and Hong Kong Jack kick off by praising the smooth and festive nature of the Australian federal election, highlighting the efficiency of the Australian Electoral Commission (AEC) and the beloved "democracy sausage."
(00:02:21) The Pre-Poll Phenomenon A discussion on the increasing trend of pre-polling, with over half of Australians casting their vote before election day. The hosts debate the merits of shortening the pre-polling period, with Hong Kong Jack lamenting the decline of traditional Saturday voting.
(00:06:06) Betting Blunders & Historic Results Labor's remarkable journey from $15 outsiders to $1.07 unbackable favourites to form government is reviewed. The episode highlights key historical markers:
(00:09:17) Seat Swings, Mea Culpas & The Greens' Tumble The hosts reflect on their pre-election predictions against the reality of significant swings to Labor (e.g., a 10% swing in Bennelong). Labor is projected to win around 90 seats.
(00:13:38) A UK Perspective & Labor's Resurgence Hong Kong Jack shares insights from the UK, where observers noted Labor's landslide and the "leaderless, rudderless, pointless" state of the Coalition. This challenges the narrative that incumbents always lose, citing recent Canadian and Australian results.
(00:16:27) Liberal Campaign Catastrophe: A "Don't Do This" Case Study A deep dive into the Liberal Party's "dreadful campaign," marked by:
(00:22:46) Trump's Take & The Muted MAGA Effect Donald Trump's reaction to the Australian election (congratulating "Albert" while feigning ignorance of Dutton) is discussed. The hosts agree that MAGA influence was minimal, with Albanese's message of "kindness is not weakness" resonating more strongly.
(00:25:13) The Liberal Party's Existential Crossroads A critical analysis of the Liberal Party's future, having lost traditional heartland seats and failed to broaden its appeal beyond an aging demographic.
(00:39:58) Senate Snapshot: Stability Prevails An overview of the projected Senate makeup across the states:
(00:42:25) Who Will Lead the Liberals? A Party in Search of Direction Speculation on the future leadership of the Liberal Party, with few obvious candidates emerging from a depleted frontbench. Dan Tehan is mentioned as a possible moderate caretaker, though the path back to government looks long and arduous.
(00:45:58) Albanese: The New "Labor God" & Chalmers' Contribution Anthony Albanese is lauded for his historic achievement, with Jim Chalmers highlighted as a key performer and media operator for Labor, despite Hong Kong Jack's gentle ribbing about his lengthy essays.
(00:48:56) Canadian Politics Upended: Liberals' Shock Comeback A look at the Canadian election, where the Liberals achieved a stunning turnaround, with Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre facing a potential seat loss. Donald Trump's inflammatory rhetoric towards Canada is seen as a contributing factor to this shift.
(00:52:12) Vatican Watch: Speculating on the Next Pope With Pope Francis's papacy in its later stages, the hosts discuss potential successors. Italian cardinals like Pietro Parolin are frontrunners, but names from Africa and the Philippines also surface. Hong Kong Jack references Morris West's The Shoes of the Fisherman for insights into papal conclaves.
(00:55:52) Sir Tony Blair on Net Zero & The Reality of Fossil Fuels Former UK PM Sir Tony Blair's call for a rethink of Net Zero policies due to cost implications is examined. Global fossil fuel consumption continues to rise (gas +2.7%, coal +1%, oil +0.8%), underscoring the challenge of the energy transition.
(01:00:24) Trump's First 100 Days (Again): Low Approval, Tariff Troubles & Papal Attire Donald Trump's second term hits the 100-day mark with historically low approval ratings (39%). The economic impact of his tariffs is starting to bite (LA port imports down one-third, US economy shrinking). Adding to the unusual, Trump has been pictured in papal robes on the White House website, even expressing a desire to be Pope.
(01:05:49) UK Political Fragmentation: Reform's Rise, Tories' Fall The UK's political landscape remains volatile. Recent local and by-election results project a national vote share that would see the Reform party at 30% and the Conservatives decimated to around 15% and potentially only five seats.
(01:08:44) Germany Considers Banning Far-Right AFD Germany is contemplating a ban on the far-right AFD party, the largest single party in the Bundestag. The hosts discuss the problematic nature of banning popular political movements, arguing it often backfires.
(01:11:21) Jay Rayner on Media: Mainstream vs. Social Food critic Jay Rayner's comments on the state of media are discussed, questioning the perceived universal informedness of mainstream journalists and acknowledging that both traditional and social media produce "rubbish."
(01:15:29) AFL Round-Up: Carlton's Collapse, Collingwood-Geelong Classic
(01:22:18) Cricket News: Indian Prodigy & Vale "The Buzz" A 17-year-old Indian cricketer makes waves in the IPL with a century. The hosts pay tribute to Carlton AFL legend Peter Bosustow ("The Buzz"), who passed away after a battle with cancer, remembering his electrifying impact on the game.
(01:27:27) NRL Update & Women's State of Origin Shines The Bulldogs continue their strong NRL run, while the Panthers finally notch a win. The NRL is praised for its successful promotion of the women's game, with the Women's State of Origin proving highly watchable.
(01:29:51) An Ode to Whale Waste: Ecological Importance Hong Kong Jack shares a fascinating environmental tidbit on the crucial role of whale excrement and urine in ocean ecosystems, highlighting a baleen whale's impressive daily urine output of 950 litres.
(01:32:10) Wrapping Up: A Transformative Election & How to Connect Jack the Insider concludes that Australia has witnessed a significant political transformation, with Anthony Albanese poised to be a long-term, impactful leader.
Listeners! It' election day and I cannot be bothered so it's AI shownotes this week. Enjoy!
Hosts: Joel Hill & Dave (Cooker Watcher Supreme)
(00:00:00) Introduction & Welcome
Joel welcomes listeners and introduces guest host Dave, replacing Jack the Insider.
Shoutout: CB Co Beer for election night viewing. Mention of a competition involving a boat trip.
Election Calls to Action:
Vote 1 Fiona Patton in the Victorian Senate, preference 2 Purple Pingers.
(00:01:48) Tinfoil Tales Follow-Up: The Next Pope?
Discussion on cooker theories about the next Pope (King Charles?).
Lindsey Graham's tweet suggesting Donald Trump for Pope.
00:02:38 Dave reads the tweet.
Trump's blue suit vs. Obama's tan suit controversy revisited.
Brief thoughts on the late Pope's legacy and potential successor.
(00:04:37) Dave's Cooker Report: Cessnock & CPAC
Dave attended a meeting with Joel Jammal ("Eyebrows") in Cessnock (his 8th visit).
Jammal debriefed the local unnamed "Freedom Group" (often linked to One Nation) on his CPAC trip.
Local Candidates Present:
Stuart Bonds (One Nation candidate for Hunter).
Jennifer Stefanak (Trumpet of Patriots Newcastle) - Flat Earther, aliens are fallen angels, won NCAT case after dismissal from child services. Not allowed to speak despite attending.
Mysterious Host: Christine Stevens, credited by Jammal as "brains behind the Wollongbae Road campaign" (a local road widening project used by cookers).
Stevens now campaign manager for Stuart Bonds (referred to as "boss"). Possible links to broader far-right organising.
Joel Jammal's Gifts: Rolled-up maps for Cessnock's 6 cooker councillors showing ALP vs. Voice 'No' vote intersections. Maps available for purchase from Jammal.
Jammal's CPAC Trip: Won the trip via the "Shark Bites Pitching Contest" at CPAC Australia (Sky paywall).
Winners expected to produce content upon return.
Included a communication seminar with Steve Bannon.
Stuart Bonds' Candidacy (Hunter):
Odds discussed ($10 on Sportsbet).
Labor's Dan Repacholi favoured ($1.15).
Bonds' history: 21% primary in 2019, left One Nation, rejoined. Consistent far-right vote in the region.
Bonds' desire to "start a conversation about coal mining" (already ongoing).
Discussion on Labor's telehealth plan and cooker opposition.
(00:24:07) Trumpism & Dutton's Campaign
Discussion on the "blueprint for Trump 28".
Chris LaCivita (Trump advisor) reportedly helped Peter Dutton's campaign. Joel questions the effectiveness given global trends.
Mainstream media's difficulty rallying behind Dutton.
(00:25:52) Cooker Report Part 2: Gosford & MyPlace
Dave attended the Lisa Bellamy independent campaign launch in Gosford.
Follow-on from "Coasties Who Care" (MyPlace environmentalist council ticket).
Shadowy Figure: Kate Mason (anti-renewable circuit, IPA/Advance events). Launched Bellamy's campaign.
Campaign barely mentions climate change, focuses on opposing Aboriginal Land Council developments.
Key Figures on Stage:
Jake Cassar (musician, prepper).
Lisa Bellamy (MyPlace coordinator, seen at Convoy with Kate Mason).
Vicki Burke (MyPlace food/water security organiser, believes in aliens/other planets).
Group suggests increased One Nation vote would benefit them. Bellamy received ~3000 votes previously.
Kate Mason's Agenda: Reshaping the environment movement to focus on conspiracies (15-min cities, anti-meat).
Shapeshifted from anti-vax (IMOP) -> Voice 'No' -> Anti-artificial food/Bellamy campaign.
Significant Telegram following despite "gobbledygook" posts.
Rally vs. Darkinjung Land Council/Woolworths Development: Focus remains on Land Council projects. Racist undertones ("love the land as much as we do").
Links to Garingai (now potentially split/rebranded). NRL Welcome to Country discussed.
Jake Cassar Deep Dive: Constant self-promotion, minimal concrete environmental vision beyond opposing the Land Council. Attacks Labor/Greens. Right-wing presence at events. Ballarat missing person search (found dog with SES). Yowie encounter at Woy Woy tip. Lack of accountability in Facebook environmental groups (anti-immigration/Aboriginal rhetoric).
(00:40:33) Monica Smit's Private Prosecution of Dan Andrews
Monica plans a private criminal prosecution against Dan Andrews (and Jacinta Allan).
Website Quote: "The wait is over righteous justice begins now" - Monica Smit.
Topher Field involved as cheerleader/promoter.
Basis: "New evidence" (Document 34 FOI email) allegedly showing curfew decision made before consulting CHO Brett Sutton. Implication: tyranny, not health advice.
Joel suggests it was likely capitulation to police enforcement ease.
Fundraising: Claimed $124,605 raised (via manually updated widget). Monica paid herself $1000/week stipend already.
Monica's Justification ("Why me?"): Stood toe-to-toe and won, relentless energy, prison time (refused bail), won appeal, resisted database handover, won unlawful arrest case (appealing costs decision), claims past refund integrity, lives simply, no distractions (children/friends).
Bender (@SpambotX) Twitter Thread: Brutal takedown of Monica as a "despicable con woman".
Highlights Consumer Affairs conviction ($66k pocketed from unregistered fundraiser).
Accuses Topher Field of seeking a cut.
Details legal failures, self-orchestrated "martyrdom", $250k legal bill after rejecting settlement.
Criticises "journalism" and book ("Cell 22").
Predicts prosecution failure and abandonment once donations dry up.
Bender's Legal Analysis (Round 2):
Private prosecution (Crimes Act s 321) needs prima facie case, not conspiracy.
Document 34 likely inadmissible hearsay.
Misconduct charge needs proof of knowing, malicious law-breaking (R v Quach).
Lockdowns upheld (Loielo v Giles), backed by Public Health Act & CHO advice.
DPP can shut down frivolous cases (Public Prosecutions Act s 22).
Previous treason case tossed out.
Criticises fundraising transparency (Fundraising Act 1998), $52k/year salary.
Highlights past legal issues (incitement charges dropped, health order conviction, Judge Tran's comments).
Past Precedent: 2021 private prosecution for treason (Anthony Herman) recalled - chaotic online hearing.
Monica's Timeline & Updates:
Initial plan: Assemble legal team by April 24, first meeting April 30.
Reality (May 1): No team announced. Video claims it will take "a few weeks" to pick lawyers.
Met with a lawyer ($500/hr, 2 hours booked).
Posted picture near a waterfall instead of legal updates ("reset and reload").
Now targeting Jacinta Allan as well.
Promises refund of remaining balance if no prospect of success.
Discussion on cooker lawyers (Matouk, Buckley). Monica's motivation seen as attention/clout chasing.
(01:17:54) Return to The Cali (Caledonian Hotel, Singleton)
Dave attended Pauline Hanson & Stuart Bonds event ($20 lunch that never happened).
Low turnout (~45 people in beer garden). Regulars, pensioners, Chris Sky filming, James Ashby present.
Stuart Bonds Guardian article discussed (misogyny, anti-vax, "Little Hitlers"). Worn as badge of honour.
Homeschooling attempt due to "woke trans agenda".
Red Ensign described as "real flag".
Unregistered campaign trailer incident.
Pauline Hanson: Speech built to "greatest hits" (Aboriginal industry). Mumbles less the longer she speaks.
Cali Update: Corruption Whistleblower book sold at bar (credit card accepted). Eureka beer on tap (FJB beer rebranded/gone?). Frenchies brewery connection? Pub seems to be returning to normal operations, but Red Ensign still flies. Food looks good, beer selection poor (Lion Nathan). No coal miners attended the event despite Bonds' background.
(01:36:30) Candidates Forum: Patterson (Port Stephens)
Dave attended forum; ABC filming due to anti-wind turbine mob presence.
Low turnout of protesters (~5 loud individuals). Meryl Swanson (Labor incumbent) well-prepared.
Marginal seat: Libs (Lawrence Ancliffe), aligned Independent, One Nation, Trumpet, Family First running against Swanson.
History of intimidation (boat incident during Mayoral campaign).
Betting odds discussed (Labor $1.66, Coalition $2.37). YouGov poll (Labor 51.8%).
Irony: Libs proposed nuclear plant at Port Stephens in 2007.
Bizarre Moments:
Trumpet candidate Peter Arena: Wind turbines interfere with missile detection; mentioned fighting audience member over wife littering.
(01:42:37) Billy Bay vs GAP Feud Update
Dr. William Bay told people not to vote for GAP (Great Australian Party) despite running for them.
Rod Culleton's response.
Billy Bay's letter to Culleton: Mock SovCit style ("Office of Vexatious Litigants and Spiritual Audits"), demands apology, foot kissing, $8 trillion. Full of threats (librarian grievance, livestream in lab coat, seizing karma balance). Written on GAP letterhead.
Feud background (payment disputes) covered previously by Tinfoil Tales.
(01:46:51) Amelia Hamer (Liberal, Kooyong) vs The People
Recap: Fake renter scandal (owns 2 properties + trust fund beneficiary).
A-Frame sign spamming controversy vs Monique Ryan (Teal MP).
Council imposed one-sign limit due to safety/obstruction complaints.
Liberals took council to Supreme Court over implied freedom of political communication.
Court upheld freedom but allowed council safety enforcement (opaque outcome).
Likely outcome: confrontations over sign placement. James Patterson claiming victory. Joel predicts local backlash.
(01:51:08) Election Odds & Predictions
Sportsbet: Labor $1.05, Coalition $9.50.
YouGov: Labor 53 / Coalition 47 (2PP). Projecting 84 seats for Labor (75 needed for majority).
Dickson (Dutton's seat): YouGov 50.2% LNP / 49.8% ALP. Sportsbet has Dutton favourite ($1.28 vs $3.35).
Joel laments betting ban but expresses optimism for Labor win, potential Dutton loss.
(01:53:29) Wrap Up & Outro
Joel thanks Dave for his "invaluable" and "brave" cooker reporting.
Standard Patreon plugs etc. skipped.
Sign off & enjoy the election.
AI shownotes again. I'm sure they are totally accurate.
Recorded: ANZAC Day (Australian Public Holiday)
Hosts: Jack the Insider & Hong Kong Jack
Introduction & ANZAC Day Reflections (00:00:01 - 00:01:17)From the publisher's feed
Welcome to The Conditional Release Program, a podcast that delves into the netherworld of cults, crims and con artists.
Who would have thought a spicy chest cough would turn everyone so…
Our weekly show covers the conspiracy theorists that created a 'shadow pandemic' of political idiocy and violent ideation within the fringe of politics.
From time to time we get our hands even dirtier with true crime deep dives. Jack is a seasoned expert in the true crime genre, having written and spoken extensively about Roger Rogerson, Stan 'the man' Smith and, of course, the Fine Cotton Fiasco. In various episodes he guides us through the dark underbelly of Australian crime in his trademark storytelling style.
The world is getting weird and we are getting weird with it. Let's watch as democracy crumbles into a smouldering heap - and take note of the kids carrying the matches and the metho.
Hosted by Jack the Insider and Joel Hill with an occasional rotation of guests that generally share our distaste toward the lunatic fringe.

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