On April 30, Eclipse Season begins with a solar eclipse in Taurus. Are you prepared for what these lunations have in store for you? In this final episode of the astrology podcast, snarky-yet-savvy astrologer extraordinaire, Cosmic Cannibal, gives you the lowdown on 2022 eclipse season, including how to survive it. Well, sort of. Mostly, she just talks about the transits--Venus conjunct Jupiter, Pluto Retrograde, Neptune trine Lunar Eclipse--and the eff those mean for you during this next round of eclipses. 

Want more astro-logic from Cosmic? Check out Cosmic on her website, cosmiccannibal.com.

This episode originally aired as part of the subScribe Podcast. 

Music Credits:

Mars and the Moon come together (not really) to make for an active weekend, and snarky-yet-savvy astrologer Cosmic Cannibal has your forecast for it all. In this episode of the comedy astrology podcast, Cosmic rambles about 2022 Mars in Pisces (and why it kinda sucks) as well as the Libra full moon (ditto the prior parenthetical). She also talks a bit about the romantic compatibility of Gemini and Libra and–this is the best part–there’s a special appearance from the one-and-only Tony the Tiger. It’s a hilarious and odd episode that’s sure to get you lol’ing. Plus, there's lots of disco muzak... 

This episode originally aired as part of the subScribe podcast

MUSIC CREDITS:

Yep, Venus has entered Pisces and snarky astrologer Cosmic Cannibal is here to tell you what the hell that means and why you should care. In this episode of the one-and-only comedy astrology podcast, Cosmic covers all aspects of Venus in Pisces, from the love planet's rulerships and Pisces' fetishes, to that oh-so ~fancy~ exaltation. Oh, and did we mention there are extended Venus in Pisces horoscopes? Because there are extended Venus in Pisces horoscopes. And disco muzak. Lots and lots of disco muzak...  

To read the O.G. horoscope article, visit https://cosmiccannibal.com/

MUSIC CREDITS:

Ready for an ambition resurrection? The 2022 Aries new moon is sure to revive and reanimate your goals, and snarky-yet-savvy astrologer Cosmic Cannibal has your hilarious horoscope for how. In this episode, Cosmic reports on everything you need to know about the 2022 Aries new moon, from all the transits (including the Chiron conjunction), to why it’s an effing perfect day to start anew. There’s also gratuitous rambling about Aries Mariah Carey, ranting about Will “bitch slap” Smith, and plenty of groovy disco muzak. It's sorta like Chaucer's General Prologue for the astrological new year. 

MUSIC CREDITS:

Predicting the future is hard work, which is why snarky yet savvy astrologer Cosmic Cannibal doesn't do that. She especially doesn't do that in this episode of the humorous astrology podcast, which reports on all that's happening on and around the 2022 Virgo full moon. Did the full moon already happen? Yeah, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't heed Cosmic's coverage of the lunation. There's also some hilarious (and deliberately vague) horoscopes for each of the 12 zodiac signs and upbeat #disco muzak. Need we say more?

A version of this podcast originally aired as part of the subScribe podcast. 

Music Credits:

What do Dua Lipa, Abraham Hicks, Cinderella and Ayahuasca have in common? They’re all part of this wacky, whimsical and slightly satirical horoscope for the March 2022 Pisces New Moon. In this short and sweet report, snarky astrologer Cosmic Cannibal tells you everything you need to know about the new moon and why it’s a primo night for making wishes. 

MUSIC CREDITS:

Get ready to dive into your feeling these coming weeks, because it’s finally Pisces Season. In this episode of the astrology podcast, snarky-yet-savvy astrology satirist Cosmic Cannibal has your hilarious forecast for Pisces season 2022. Join her as she reports on all this season’s transits, including, but not limited to: Venus conjunct Mars, the Pisces New Moon, Venus/Mars in Aquarius and the Virgo Full Moon. There's also gratuitous crying (hey, Cosmic is a Pisces Moon, layoff), upbeat disco muzak and some jazz. Need we say more?

This episode originally aired on the subScribe podcast. 

Music Credits:

In an a very un-Leo-like way, snarky astrologer Cosmic Cannibal has your stripped down, unvarnished, unplugged Leo full moon horoscope, sans disco music. Is this is a new trend for the satirical astrology expert? Nah. She was just too busy to do any sound mixing. #holla

Feel like reading your horoscope? Check them out at https://cosmiccannibal.com/2022/02/15/your-2022-leo-full-moon-horoscope/

After a rather long break, snarky-yet-savvy astrology satirist Cosmic Cannibal is back and has your February forecast covered. In this episode of the astrology podcast, Cosmic reports on all the planetary transits taking place this month, including, but not limited to: Mercury in Aquarius, the Leo Full Moon and Pisces season. There's also horoscopes for each of the 12 zodiac signs and upbeat #disco muzak. Need we say more?

This episode originally aired on the subScribe podcast. 

To read more astrology articles and horoscopes like this, visit https://cosmiccannibal.com/

Music Credits:

After a brief holiday break, snarky astrologer Cosmic Cannibal is back with a bang--and a bang-up forecast for 2022 Aquarius season. In this short and sweet episode, Cosmic covers all the transits happening this Water Bearer season, from Mars in Capricorn and Mercury in Aquarius, to the Aquarius New Moon and much, much more. 

So...this is what, like, the first episode of season 3 or something? Yeah, sure. Just listen to it. You won't be disappointed. 

This episode is based on an article published in The Scribe. 

Music Credits:

Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License

http://creativecommons.org/licenses/b...