The Courageous Life

Jeffrey Hull, Ph.D. is an author, educator and consultant with over twenty years experience partnering with C-suite executives on issues of high performance leadership, change management, organizational strategy, structure and culture. Dr. Hull is a highly sought-after facilitator, keynote speaker and executive coach to both non-profit and for-profit global organizations. Dr. Hull is Director of Education & Business Development at the Institute of Coaching, McLean Hospital, a Harvard Medical School Affiliate. He is also a clinical instructor in psychology at Harvard Medical School and an adjunct professor of leadership at New York University. For more about Jeff, and his new book Flex: The Art and Science of Leadership in a Changing World, please visit jeffreyhull.com

In this episode Jeff and I explore:

• The current landscape of leadership and who is rising to the top
• Why agility and being able to flex your communication style is key to succeeding as a leader
• Practical strategies that will help you to flex 
• Stories of inspirational leaders Jeff has worked with
• Vulnerability as a form of courage 
• How to tap into creativity including practices that are supportive of innovation
• Jeff's latest thinking on the future of leadership and why compassion is at the core
• And more!

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Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman is a humanistic psychologist exploring the depths of human potential. He has taught courses on intelligence, creativity, and well-being at Columbia University, NYU, and the University of Pennsylvania. He is interested in using his research to help all kinds of minds live a creative, fulfilling, and self-actualized life. Scott's writing has appeared in The Atlantic, Scientific American, Psychology Today, and Harvard Business Review. In his latest book Transcend: The New Science of Self-Actualization, he presents a new hierarchy of human needs for the 21st century, one that allows for the fulfillment of individual potential as well as the actualization of transcendent purpose and peak experiences. Scott also hosts the #1 psychology podcast in the world, The Psychology Podcast. To learn more, please visit scottbarrykaufman.com

In this episode Scott and I discuss themes from his new book Transcend, including:

• His deep interest in the Abraham Maslow's work and motivation for writing Transcend
• The psychology of everyday saints
• The link between a "quiet ego" and self-actualization
• Acceptance as a form of courage 
• Practical strategies for living a more authentic and fulfilling life
• Finding meaning and joy in everyday experiences
• How setting personal boundaries can unlock a deeper capacity for compassion
• And more!

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Have you ever thought about us and them thinking, judgment,  tribalism, or blame as habits? If they are habits, can they be broken using the latest science of habit change? Dr. Jud and I dive deep into this question in this episode. We also explore: 

• A 3 step process for habit change developed by Jud and his team
• Why Jud believes curiosity is a superpower
• How to rewire your brain for greater kindness, curiosity, and connection
• The key to adopting a growth mindset
• What Jud's team found when they analyzed Anderson Cooper's brain during meditation
• How findings from Jud's neuroscience lab can be used to build bridges, counter tribalism, and foster community
• Practical ways to keep your heart open when it begins to close
• How mindfulness can be helpful in dealing with difficult emotions

About Dr. Jud:

Dr. Jud Brewer is passionate about understanding how our brains work, and how to use that knowledge to help people make deep, permanent change in their lives — with the goal of reducing suffering in the world at large. He is the Director of Research and Innovation at the Mindfulness Center and associate professor in psychiatry at the School of Medicine at Brown University. As an addiction psychiatrist and internationally known expert in mindfulness training for treating addictions, Dr. Jud has developed and tested novel mindfulness programs for habit change, including both in-person and app-based treatments for smoking, emotional eating, and anxiety. He has also studied the underlying neural mechanisms of mindfulness. He has trained US Olympic athletes and coaches, foreign government ministers and corporate leaders. His work has been featured on 60 Minutes, TED, Time magazine, Forbes, CNN, BBC, NPR, The Washington Post, Businessweek and others. You can find out more at drjud.com

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Show notes and more can be found at joshuasteinfeldt.com/podcast

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Samantha Novick is passionate about amplifying the voices of people with disabilities, creating connections and sharing kindness with others. She pursues these passions as a speech-language pathologist, owner of her private practice Bridge Therapy, and President of The Friendship Journey, a charitable organization that cultivates equitable friendships and experiences amongst people of all abilities. Samantha grew up in Parkland, Florida. After a violent mass shooting devastated her community, her passion for activism, social justice and philanthropy grew. Samantha is committed to honoring those who lost their lives to hatred through acts of love and meaningful action in their memories. This summer, The Friendship Journey partnered with Dylan’s Wings of Change of the Sandy Hook community to create a free virtual summer camp for teens and adults with disabilities through the Covid-19 crisis. Their camp motto this summer was “look for the good.” For more about Samantha please visit thefriendshipjourney.org

In this episode Sam shares:

• Strategies for finding joy when times are hard
• How she has developed a quality called equanimity, the ability to "hold it all", and how this has helped her during the pandemic
• The power of self-care and why she was resistant to it at first
• Highlights from Camp Wings of Friendship, a free virtual summer camp for teens and adults with disabilities she co-created this summer
• Why acts of kindness may be a key to resilience and thriving
• Why "looking for the good" can be a life-changing mindset
• And more!

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Fred Guttenberg began his public life after the murder of his beautiful 14-year-old daughter Jaime in the Parkland school shooting on Feb 14, 2018.  The day after the murder, Fred decided to attend a public vigil in Parkland.  While there, the Mayor asked him to speak.  His words shook a nation and he has not stopped since. Only four months prior to the murder of his daughter, Fred's brother Michael passed away in October 2017 from cancer related to his service in 9/11.  He was one of the original first responders at the World Trade Center with a team of doctors who got trapped in the building as it collapsed. Amazingly, the room that they hid out in did not collapse and Michael and his team of physicians spent 16 days at ground zero taking care of others. Following his involvement in these two distinct American Tragedies, Fred has traveled the country talking about both events but also talking about perspective, perseverance, and resilience.  He discusses pivotal moments in life and how we respond to those moments.  Fred uses his speech to inspire others. Learn more about Fred's work at orangeribbonsforjaime.org and pick up his book, Find the Helpers: What 9/11 and Parkland Taught Me About Recovery, Purpose, and Hope now.

In this episode Fred and I discuss themes from his new book Find the Helpers including:

• Who his helpers are and how they have helped him to deal with grief, transform pain into purpose, and find hope after Parkland and 9/11
• What Joe Biden taught him about grief
• How he has been able to respond to acts of hate from a place of compassion, and love
• The importance of community when it comes to being resilient
• Practical strategies for overcoming 'us and them' thinking
• More about his mission of reducing gun violence, and some of the incredible progress that has been made in terms of new laws and bills, including Jaime's Law that honors his daughter's death by continuing to save lives in her name
• Why it's not what happens to you, but your response that matters most
• And more!

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Sharon Salzberg is a central figure in the field of meditation, a world-renowned teacher and NY Times bestselling author. She has played a crucial role in bringing meditation and mindfulness practices to the West and into mainstream culture since 1974, when she first began teaching. She is the co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society in Barre, MA and the author of over ten books including NY Times bestseller, Real Happiness, her seminal work, Lovingkindness, Real Love, and her latest release Real Change: Mindfulness to Heal Ourselves and the World. Acclaimed for her humorous, down-to-earth teaching style, Sharon offers a secular, modern approach to Buddhist teachings, making them instantly accessible. She is a regular columnist for On Being, a contributor to Huffington Post, and the host of her own podcast: The Metta Hour. For more, visit www.SharonSalzberg.com.

In this episode Sharon and I discuss themes related to her new book Real Change including:

• How to deal with strong emotions using mindfulness
• Working with anger in a skillful way, harnessing it's benefits for action while not getting overwhelmed by it
• Finding joy today, in the face of these tumultuous times
• Why joy is a strategy for resilience
• Equanimity and how to find a sense of balance even in the face of tremendous challenges like the pandemic, election stress, or other adversity
• Moving away from us and them thinking by embracing common humanity
• Finding compassion for people we may disagree with or not like

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Tal Ben-Shahar is an author and lecturer.  He taught two of the largest classes in Harvard University’s history, Positive Psychology and The Psychology of Leadership.  Today, Tal consults and lectures around the world to executives in multi-national corporations, the general public, and at-risk populations.  The topics he lectures on include leadership, happiness, education, innovation, ethics, self-esteem, resilience, goal setting, and mindfulness. His books have been translated into more than twenty-five languages, and have appeared on best-sellers lists around the world. Tal is a serial entrepreneur, and is the co-founder and chief learning officer of Happiness Studies Academy, Potentialife, Maytiv, and Happier.TV. An avid sportsman, Tal won the U.S. Intercollegiate and Israeli National squash championships. Find out more about Tal at talbenshahar.com

In this episode we discuss:

• Perfectionism - what it is, how it works, and how to work with this tendency more skillfully in one's life
• How Tal works with perfectionism in his own life
• The power of acceptance and why this is such a powerful approach to working with perfectionism and finding happiness
• Details on Tal's approach to teaching and speaking. How he prepares, and thinks about connecting with his audience
• Why reminders are so critical to a happier and more optimal way of living and working
• Strategies and approaches for increasing gratitude, and for working with difficult emotions
• And more!

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For show notes and more visit joshuasteinfeldt.com/podcast

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Chris Germer, PhD is a clinical psychologist and lecturer on psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. In 2007, Chris began collaborating with Kristin Neff, psychology professor at the University of Texas, Austin, and pioneering researcher on self-compassion.  In 2009, he wrote the book, The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion, and, in 2010, Chris and Kristin co-developed Mindful Self-Compassion (MSC), an empirically-supported, 8-week training program for the general public.  The Center for Mindful Self-Compassion was established in 2012 and since then tens of thousands of people have learned MSC. Additionally, they have co-authored two books on MSC, The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook and Teaching the Mindful Self-Compassion Program. Chris spends most of his time lecturing and leading workshops around the world on mindfulness and self-compassion, supporting MSC teachers and students, and maintaining a modest psychotherapy practice. To learn more about Chris, check out chrisgermer.com

In this episode Chris and I explore: 

• How compassion meditation helped him overcome a long battle with public speaking anxiety
• How acceptance can be a powerful way to reduce suffering and stress
• Fierce compassion, and why compassion can be a form of courage
• What self-compassion is and what it's not
• The myths and misconceptions about self-compassion
• Why self-compassion helps build resilience, enhance motivation, and improve relationships
• The health benefits of self-compassion
• How self-compassion can be an antidote to shame
• Practical strategies for building mindfulness and compassion in one's life
• And more!

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Goalkeeper Stephanie Labbé has been part of the Canadian Women’s Soccer program since 2002. She made her Olympic debut at Rio 2016 where she started five of six games, allowing just four goals, as Team Canada won the bronze medal. Labbé was on the Canadian roster for the FIFA Women’s World Cup in 2011, 2015, and 2019 (starting all 4 games in 2019). Labbé played collegiate soccer for the University of Connecticut. In her senior year she was named the 2008 Big East Goalkeeper of the Year. Labbé is the current starting goalkeeper for the professional team the North Carolina Courage. Learn more about Steph at stephlabbe.com or on instagram @stephlabbe1

In this episode Steph shares: 

• Her inspiring story of walking away from the Canadian National Team to work on herself, and how she came back stronger, happier, and better than ever. 
• Tips and strategies for performing under pressure and boosting resilience
• How to learn from failure
• Mindset practices for dealing with uncertainty, particularly during COVID
• The importance of surrounding yourself with people who believe in you and allow you to be who you are
• Key learnings from her ongoing journey toward living a more authentic life 
• The importance of humor for getting through challenging times
• Tips for anyone looking to pursue really big dreams and goals
• And more!

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You can find show notes at www.joshuasteinfeldt.com/podcast

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When the Hockley family relocated from England to Connecticut in the winter of 2011 it was the realization of a family dream. Ian had visited the United States regularly since childhood, Nicole was from Rhode Island and Jake was born on the 4th of July; in many ways it was coming home.They moved to the idyllic town of Sandy Hook which Ian selected after touring the beautiful neighborhoods and meeting the staff at the elementary school, knowing Dylan especially would get a fantastic start as they made their new life. This bright beginning ran full force into the American nightmare on December 14th, 2012 when Dylan was shot and killed in his first-grade classroom alongside 19 of his fellow students and six educators in one of the worst mass shootings in recent U.S. history.

 Ian and Nicole created Dylan’s Wings of Change, dedicated to his memory with a mission to inspire empathy, courage & hope. everywhere. Working with experts the foundation created Wingman, a program of experiential learning activities that foster deeper conversations, stronger teams and more connected communities. Wingman is effective for humans of all ages and works especially well as a peer-led social and emotional learning program both in and out of schools.Ian now works full time for the foundation, serving as Executive Director, and is dedicated to spreading the message of acceptance and inclusion for all. He warmly shares Dylan’s story with the world, the 6-year old boy who had his own way of communicating, who radiated pure love and described himself as “a beautiful butterfly” to his mother. Ian addresses the epidemic of social isolation and exclusion today and the need for social and emotional programming everywhere.

In this episode we explore:

• More about Ian's story and the events that occurred on December 14, 2012
• His road to healing
• His motivation for spreading messages of love, kindness, and empathy after experiencing acts of hate and violence
• Details about the Wingman Program and Dylans Wings of Change
• How the Wingman Program promotes social and emotional learning, and positive leadership in schools 
• Why Ian views empathy as an antidote for our time
• Why it is so important to focus on the things we have, as opposed to things we don't, in the face of adversity
• And much more!

For more about Ian please visit Dylanswingsofchange.org

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Show notes can be found at joshuasteinfeldt.com/podcast

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