The Dildorks

We sat down with therapist and educator Aida Manduley to discuss the psychological model known as attachment theory – how it works, why it matters, and (of course) how it relates to non-monogamy and kink!

What Is Attachment Theory? | Insecure | Secure | Anxious-Preoccupied | Dismissive-Avoidant | Fearful-Avoidant | Caveats | Childhood | Abuse | What to Work On | Distress Tolerance | Different Manifestations | Becoming Secure | Feelings | Silence | How to Say No | Emergencies | Non-Monogamy | Kink | Bragging | Reinforcement | Context

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

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In preparation for Bex’s long-awaited top surgery, we had a conversation about his reasons for getting it, what he’s been doing to get ready for it, and what he thinks will happen during recovery and beyond.
 

Time Travel | Rude Questions | What Is It? | Deciding | Process | Risks | Fears | Pain | Recovery | Depression | Regrets | Saying Goodbye | Chest Hair | Looking Forward | Sex | Friends & Partners | Advice | Thirst Traps

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

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This week rounds out our 3-part series on breakups! We’re addressing some awkward post-split situations, like reclaiming your possessions, saying goodbye to your ex’s family, and dealing with passive-aggressive tweetstorms.
 

Getting Back Your Stuff | Impulsive Breakups | Taking a Break | Close Quarters | New Dates | Harping On | Friends & Family | Subtweets

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

We had more to say about breakups, so here’s another episode about the ends of relationships!

Grammar/Gender Rebel | Rebounds | Staying Friends | Small Talk | Best Breakup | Pre-Negotiation | Friend Breakups | Poly Breakups | Supporting Partners | D/s Breakups

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

How did it take us this long to do an episode about breakups? This week we’re discussing some of our worst splits, how we think they should be done, and what should happen afterward.

Which One Is Harder? | First Breakup | Text vs. In Person | Long-Distance | Teenage Bullshit | When Is It Time? | Downleveling | Clarity | Reasons | Safety | Location | Post-Breakup Conversations | Getting Better | Uncertainty | Grief | Time Heals All Wounds | Trauma | Attachment | Distraction vs. Processing | TV Marathons | Rorschach | Crying

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

This week we’re interviewing Dr. Liz Powell, psychologist, speaker, and author of our favorite book on non-monogamy, Building Open Relationships. We touch on polyamory struggles, love as a verb, and creating the relationships you want, among other things!
 

Building Open Relationships | Jealousy | Desire-Based Approach | Breaking Up | Downleveling | Hierarchy | Flexibility | Boundaries | Perfect Poly | Fucking Up | Monogamy Mindset Hangovers | Soulmates | Real Love | Transference

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Truth or dare? We DARE you to join us this week for a discussion of sex games: different types, ways to play them, and why they might be beneficial.

Travel Exhaustion | Why? | Mass Market Games | Excuses | Dulcinea Pitagora | Competition | Game Development | Strip Scrabble | Video Games | Roleplay | Reward vs. Punishment | Consent | Sex Dice | Truth or Dare | Intoxicants | Who Would You Fuck? | Gamification | Protocol | Habitica | Sticker Chart | Skill Equity | Group Sex | Making a Game | Dating Sims | OMGyes | Question Box

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

This week Bex interviews his friend and roommate, sex educator and queer pirate Jo Goforth, about finding identity through fandom, positive representations of masculinity, and their new sex ed comic, among other things.

Coworker Chart | Union-Busting | Fandom | A Song of Ice and Fire | X-Men | Black Sails | Resonant Characters | Quicksilver | Cosplay | Musketeers | Jake Peralta | Positive Masculinity | Queer Representation | Queer Utopia | Trans Generations | Transphobia | Coming Out | Shifting Orientation | Introspection | Sex Talk Comic | Trans Sex Ed

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

We’re back to smash more romantic myths this week! Hear our takes on unconditional love, jealousy, internet relationships, and more.

Femme Multitasking | Someone For Everyone | Commitment | Love Conquers All | Unconditional Love | Who’s the Man? | Center of Your Universe | Obsessed | Online Relationships | Jealousy | Political Views | Cheaters | Bodily Functions | Sharing a Bed | Dressing Up | Leagues

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

There’s so much bullshit discourse about dating and relationships out there, so this week we’re busting romantic myths! Hear us debate first-date protocols, compatibility adages, gender stereotypes, and more.

I Love You | 3rd Date | 3 Days | Hard to Get | Preserving the Mystery | Attachment Style | The First Move | Who Pays? | Mentioning Exes | Opposites Attract | Conflict | Love at First Sight | First Date | Self-Love | Happy Wife | Going to Bed Angry | Persistence | Bad Relationship Material | Virgins

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.