The Divorcing Religion Podcast

Jena Miyu is the co-owner of a YouTube channel called The Atheist Network Group “The Flavor” with her boyfriend, Oz. Jena was raised a Baptist Christian and has been an atheist for nearly 4 years. She has been part of the online atheist community for the same amount of time. Jena has co-hosted, produced, and run several different shows and channels.

In this episode, Jena shares some of the challenges related to rejecting Christianity as a Black woman, mourning losses without belief in gods, and rebuilding identity post religion.

FIND JENA:
YouTube: 
https://youtube.com/@ITSTANGGANG
https://youtube.com/@BlackFemaleAtheist
https://www.facebook.com/jena.miyu.3?mibextid=LQQJ4d
https://www.twitter.com/@jena_bfa

CW: Death of father, estrangement

Support this podcast on Patreon (starting as low as $2/month) and get access to bonus content: https://www.patreon.com/janiceselbie Thanks to my newest patrons: Lois, SatX, Carol, CMM, RL, and KD. Every dollar helps.

Recordings from the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference now 50% off here https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/register with discount code SPECIAL50

Tickets now available for CORT2023: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/

Subscribe to the audio-only version here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/religious-trauma-podcast
Follow Janice and the Conference on Religious Trauma on Social Media: 
Mastodon: [email protected]
Twitter: https://twitter.com/divorcereligion
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Wise_counsellor
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ComeToCORT
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DivorcingReligion
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@janiceselbie
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wisecounsellor/

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician.

Support the show

Daniella Mestyanek Young - Sex Cult Survivor

Divorced: The Children of God cult

TW: Discussion of CSA and military sexual assault

DANIELLA MESTYANEK YOUNG is an American author and speaker who was raised in the religious cult, Children of God.

She later served as an intelligence officer for the US Army for over 6 years, making the rank of Captain, and became one of the first women in US Army history to conduct deliberate ground combat operations when she volunteered to serve on a Female Engagement Team, and received the Presidential Volunteer Service Award. Daniella is a wife and mother in Maryland and holds a Master’s Degree in Industrial and Organizational Psychology from the Harvard Extension School.

In today’s episode, Daniella discusses escaping from the Children of God and trying to integrate into secular life, as well as parallels between all cultish groups (including the military).

For more from Daniella, join us online in October at CORT2023: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/

DANIELLA’S LINKS
https://www.amazon.com/Uncultured-Memoir-Daniella-Mestyanek-Young/dp/1250280117/ref=tmm_hrd_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667828324&sr=8-1

https://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/life-and-relationships/growing-up-in-a-cult-we-kept-our-pain-silent-20221214-p5c6be.html

https://www.mamamia.com.au/uncultured-book-daniella-young/

Support this podcast on Patreon for as low as $2/month to get ad-free episodes and bonus content: https://www.patreon.com/janiceselbie T

Thanks to my latest Patrons: Hayley, Lois, and SatX,.

Subscribe to the audio-only version here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/religious-trauma-podcast

Recordings from the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference now 50% off here https://www.shamelesssexuality.org/ with discount code SPECIAL50

Support the show

Dr. Ling Lam - Spiritual Refugee
Divorced: Fundamentalist Christianity

Dr. Ling Lam is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with a part-time practice in Palo Alto and San Francisco. He is also a Lecturer in the Counseling Psychology Department at Santa Clara University, where he teaches courses on Complex Trauma, Crisis Intervention, LGBT Counseling, Family Therapy, Couple Therapy and Multicultural Psychotherapy. 
 
In this episode, Dr. Lam discusses his own challenges with cultural shifts, spiritual awakenings, and embracing his sexuality as a member of the 2SLGBTQ+ community..

For more from Dr. Lam, join us at CORT2023. Tickets now available: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/

FIND DR. LAM:
https://www.scu.edu/ecp/faculty/counselingfaculty/ling-lam-phd/lam.html
https://www.therealling.com/
 
Support this podcast on Patreon (starting as low as $2/month) and get access to bonus content: https://www.patreon.com/janiceselbie Thanks to my newest patrons: Hayley, Lois, and SatX. Every dollar helps.

Recordings from the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference now 50% off here https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/register with discount code SPECIAL50


Subscribe to the audio-only version here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/religious-trauma-podcast

Follow Janice and the Conference on Religious Trauma on Social Media: 
Mastodon: [email protected]
Twitter: https://twitter.com/divorcereligion
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Wise_counsellor
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ComeToCORT
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DivorcingReligion
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@janiceselbie
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wisecounsellor/

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician.

Support the show

Erica Smith - Sex After Purity Culture

Erica Smith is an award-winning sexuality educator and consultant with over 20 years of experience. She has provided comprehensive sex education and advocacy to young women and LGBTQ+ youth in Philadelphia’s juvenile justice system, worked in abortion care, and supported HIV+ and transgender adolescents and their families.

Erica developed the Purity Culture Dropout™️ Program to provide the sex education we missed growing up in purity culture - a program that is accurate, queer inclusive, trauma informed, compassionate, and comprehensive.

On today’s episode, Erica shares some of the experiences that helped her see the need for programs tailored to those recovering from Christianity and purity culture indoctrination.

Erica was one of our speakers in 2022 at the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference – for which recordings are now available at 50% off!

For more from Erica, join us at CORT2023 online October 20-22. Get your tickets here: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/

FIND ERICA
www.purityculturedropout.com
https://www.ericasmitheac.com/
 
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Recordings from the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference now 50% off here https://www.shamelesssexuality.org/ with discount code SPECIAL50

Many sex-themed books are mentioned in the second half of this episode.

Support this podcast on Patreon (starting as low as $2/month) and get access to bonus content: https://www.patreon.com/janiceselbie Thanks to my latest Patrons: Lois, SatX, Carol, CMM, RL, & Kevin D!

Subscribe to the audio-only version here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/religious-trauma-podcast

Get your free consultation with Janice, book 1:1 sessions, or sign up for the Divorcing Religion Workshop here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/

Get your recordings from the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference here: https://www.shamelesssexuality.org/

Follow Janice and the Conference on Religious Trauma on Social Media: 
Mastodon: @[email protected] 
Twitter: https://twitter.com/divorcereligion
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Wise_counsellor
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ComeToCORT
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DivorcingReligion
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wisecounsellor/
The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician.

Support the show

Angel De Santis - Surviving God’s Twisted Love 
Divorced: The Children of God cult

CW: CSA

ANGEL DeSANTIS 

Angel grew up in the apocalyptic Christian cult known as The Children of God. She managed to leave the cult about 14 years ago, and has been on a healing journey ever since, by building her brain and sharing her thought processes with others.

Angel is a mental health advocate, cult survivor, & storyteller, in addition to being a yoga teacher in LA.

She has a YT channel and has developed several courses to help others in recovery from religious and other forms of trauma. Links will be posted in the show notes for Angel’s resources.

In October of 2023, Angel will be speaking on a panel at the Conference on Religious Trauma (CORT) about CSA and child marriage.
https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/

FIND ANGEL
https://www.theprocessbyangel.com/
https://www.youtube.com/c/AngelDeSantis/featured

Support this podcast on Patreon (starting as low as $2/month) and get access to bonus content: https://www.patreon.com/janiceselbie Thanks to my newest patrons: Carol, CMM, RL, and KD! Every dollar helps.

Subscribe to the audio-only version here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/religious-trauma-podcast

For a limited time, purchase recordings from the 2022 Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference for 50% off here https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/register with discount code SPECIAL50

Tickets for CORT2023 now available: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/

Follow Janice and the Conference on Religious Trauma on Social Media: 
Mastodon: @[email protected] 
Twitter: https://twitter.com/divorcereligion
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Wise_counsellor
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ComeToCORT
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DivorcingReligion
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wisecounsellor/

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician.

Support the show

Tatyana Russell-Chipp
Divorced: Christianity

CW: Adoption, sexual assault 

Today on the Divorcing Religion Podcast we will be exploring adoption – particularly religious adoption – with all of its sticky tentacles and residue, especially for those adoptees who outgrow their adoptive parents’ religious beliefs.

Tatyana Russell-Chipp was adopted from Russia into a Canadian Christian family. She was a pastor and ministry leader for about 10 years but deconstructed her faith altogether following significant spiritual abuse. In this interview, Tatyana shares candidly about abandonment issues related to being relinquished at birth and then fearing additional abandonment by coming out to her parents as a nonbeliever who is also a member of the 2SLGBTQ community.

FIND TATYANA:
Tatyana Link Tree https://linktr.ee/totttttttttt

RESOURCES
Religion News Service Article: https://religionnews.com/2022/10/28/adoption-remembrance-day-adoption-awareness-monthon-oct-30-adoptee-remembrance-day-centers-adoptee-grief/

Books:
No More Faking Fine: Ending the Pretending by Esther Fleece
The Child Catchers: Rescue, Trafficking, and the New Gospel of Adoption by Kathryn Joyce

Support this podcast on Patreon and get access to bonus content: https://www.patreon.com/janiceselbie Thanks to my latest Patrons: SatX, Carol, CMM, RL, & Kevin D. Your support makes a big difference!
Subscribe to the audio-only version here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/religious-trauma-podcast
 
Get your free consultation with Janice, book 1:1 sessions, or sign up for the Divorcing Religion Workshop here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/

Get your recordings from the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference here: https://www.shamelesssexuality.org/ with 50% off when you use discount code SPECIAL50
Tickets for CORT2023 now available: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/

Follow Janice and the Conference on Religious Trauma on Social Media: 
Mastodon: @[email protected] 
Twitter: https://twitter.com/divorcereligion
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Wise_counsellor
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ComeToCORT
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DivorcingReligion
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wisecounsellor/

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician.

Support the show

Mary Byler 
Divorced: Traditional Amish lifestyle and beliefs

CW: CSA

My guest today is advocate, podcaster, and newly published author Mary Byler. 

Mary grew up Amish, and since escaping has focussed attention on the child sexual abuse that plagues many Anabaptist and other closed religious communities, including Amish ones.

Her new book is called Reflections and Memories of an Amish Misfit.
Mary will be joining us as a speaker at CORT2023 in October: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/

RESOURCES
Mary’s book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BPQJNT7K

Petition for Children’s Rights: http://surl.li/frhaw

Research paper: https://www.themisfitamish.com/research

Amish Unbaptism: http://surl.li/frhbg

What’s beneath the Amish dress: https://www.tiktok.com/@the.misfit.amish/video/7116610172088274222?is_from_webapp=1&web_id=6968095332241737222

Support this podcast on Patreon (starting as low as $2/month) and get access to bonus content: https://www.patreon.com/janiceselbie Thanks to my newest patrons: SatX, Carol, CMM, RL, and KD. Every dollar helps.

Recordings from the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference now 50% off here:https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/register with discount code SPECIAL50

Tickets now available for CORT2023: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/

Subscribe to the audio-only version here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/religious-trauma-podcast
Follow Janice and the Conference on Religious Trauma on Social Media: 
Mastodon: [email protected]
Twitter: https://twitter.com/divorcereligion
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Wise_counsellor
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ComeToCORT
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DivorcingReligion
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@janiceselbie
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wisecounsellor/

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician.

Support the show

Zorah Khan - My Leap to Freedom
Divorced: Islamic cult

*I apologize for some background noise in this episode from my noisy furnace – but it’s worth listening to this amazing story of hard-won freedom!

Zorah Khan understands both cultural oppression and religious indoctrination, having grown up in an Islamic cult from childhood. In addition to being deeply fear-based, the cult also endorsed the suppression of joy, freedom, and segregation from wider society.
In her own words: “My opinions and freedom were always in the hands of someone else. This conditioning ran so deep that I couldn't even gain an understanding of the situation until I escaped and had space.”
 
Life looks very different for Zorah these days. Viewing herself as an intuitive healer, her passion now is to hold space for people moving through personal transformation. Today, Zorah opens up about life inside a repressive Islamic cult and what moved her to escape.

FIND ZORAH KHAN:
https://www.zorahkhan.com/

RESOURCES MENTIONED:
https://www.journeyfree.org/leaving-the-fold/
https://www.journeyfree.org/
https://poets.org/poem/autobiography-eve
Support this podcast on Patreon (starting as low as $2/month) and get access to bonus content: https://www.patreon.com/janiceselbie Thanks to my newest patrons: Carol, CMM, RL, and KD! Every dollar helps.

Subscribe to the audio-only version here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/religious-trauma-podcast

Follow Janice and the Conference on Religious Trauma on Social Media: 
Mastodon: [email protected]
Twitter: https://twitter.com/divorcereligion
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Wise_counsellor
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ComeToCORT
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/janice.selbie
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DivorcingReligion
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ConferenceOnReligiousTrauma
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@janiceselbie
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wisecounsellor/

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician.

Support the show

Marie LePage - PSYCHEDELICS: THE UNF*CKENING
Divorced: Evangelical/nondenominational Catholicism

*Note* Do not try psychedelics without first conferring with your doctor. For some people, it is never safe to use psychedelics. Use of psychedelics is not legal in many states and countries.

MARIE Le PAGE describes herself as a life doula, life coach, community organizer, and plant-medicine sitter. Marie understands personally the pain and trauma of growing up in an emotionally neglectful and spiritually abusive household. Upon discovering plant medicine, Marie started their awakening and integration experience. They now find joy in coaching others who are also awakening, whether it’s processing their spiritual abuse, their journeys into non-traditional relationship structures, or any other deconstruction and healing path.

Marie recently spoke at the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture online conference about remedial consent for former fundies and hosted the More Than Monogamy Panel, of which I was a member. Today, Marie shares candidly about her use of psychedelics to aid in personal unf*ckening related to trauma.

Get your tickets to the Conference on Religious Trauma/Shameless Sexuality Conference 2023: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/

Watch Marie's talk at the Shameless Sexuality Conference in 2022 with a resource ticket: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/register

FIND MARIE:
https://www.marielepage.com/
RESOURCES MENTIONED:
Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference. Recordings available for purchase here: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/register

Subscribe to the audio-only version here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/religious-trauma-podcast
Get your free consultation with Janice here: http://calendly.com/janice-selbie
Book 1:1 sessions with Janice or sign up for the Divorcing Religion Workshop here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/
Support this podcast on Patreon (starting as low as $2/month) and get access to bonus content: https://www.patreon.com/janiceselbie 
Thanks to my newest patrons: EC, CMM, RL, and KD. Every dollar helps!

Follow Janice and the Conference on Religious Trauma on Social Media: 
Mastodon: [email protected]
Twitter: https://twitter.com/divorcereligion
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Wise_counsellor
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ComeToCORT
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/janice.selbie
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DivorcingReligion
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ConferenceOnReligiousTrauma
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@janiceselbie
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wisecounsellor/

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician.

Support the show

Willie Cartwright - Saved to Sane

Divorced: Christianity

WILLIE CARTWRIGHT is a speaker, entrepreneur, author, and advocate. Willie is a professional person, having received a B.S Degree in Finance and earned an Executive MBA.Though he and his wife now own several successful businesses, Willie and his sister were raised by a single mother in the public housing neighbourhoods of Birmingham, Alabama.

As a child, he was relentlessly bullied due to his thick glasses and stutter. His stepfather was so verbally abusive that Willie threatened to kill him.Raised in a strict Christian household deep in the Bible belt, Willie walked away from organized religion and Christianity in 2015.

After doing exhaustive research on the topic, he wrote his most recent book: From Saved to Sane: My journey away from Christianity and how it has adversely affected the African American Community. Today, Willie shares about the impact his deconversion had on family relationships and why he is so passionate about educating on religion and critical thinking.

Get your tickets to the Conference on Religious Trauma: https://www.religioustraumaconference.org/

FIND WILLIE CARTWRIGHT
https://www.williecartwrightspeaks.com/
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCktoA5hQZBI03PIQAOoS2nQ
https://www.facebook.com/WillieCartwrightSpeaks/?fref=ts
https://twitter.com/wocartwright

RESOURCES MENTIONED
Dr. Darrel Ray at CORT2021 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GgclZY5X6B4 
Jeremiah Camara http://jeremiahcamara.com/
Mandisa Thomas https://blacknonbelievers.org/
Candace Gorham https://twitter.com/ebonyexodus
https://www.seculartherapy.org/
https://www.shamelesssexuality.org/

Follow Janice and the Conference on Religious Trauma on Social Media: 
Mastodon: [email protected]
Twitter: https://twitter.com/divorcereligion
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Wise_counsellor
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ComeToCORT
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/janice.selbie
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DivorcingReligion
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ConferenceOnReligiousTrauma
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@janiceselbie
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wisecounsellor/

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician.

Support the show