The Everyday Human

May: On Love

May 20

Today's reflection was inspired by a quote from Jonny Cash.

It’s an interesting thing, this idea that paradise is somewhere out there waiting for you. And I blame the travel industry and marketing. You’ve been sold this idea that where you live and where you are isn’t paradise, and that you need this idea of paradise to be happy, but as the old saying goes, “wherever you go, there you are.” 

Are you going to buy into it? When what they’re really selling you is this idea of escape?

They’re just other places, after all, right? The people there have their own visions of paradise or escape, maybe. It’s really a matter of perspective and choice. 

So, will you let paradise be another place? Or will it be anywhere, wherever you are and with the loved one you’re next to?

• Reflection title: Let’s Meet Up Again in Paradise
• Creative inspiration: Johnny Cash
• Reflection Question: Where is my paradise and who is there with me?

May: On Love

May 19

Today's reflection was inspired by the poem "Once I Passed Through a Populous City" by Walt Whitman.

So what is it that endures through time? What will the ruins of the places I visit and live in now look like 3000 years into the future? Will some soul wander through and imagine the lives and love that existed millennia ago? Perhaps . . .

What endures these ages later is not the purpose of buildings, the utility of them or the practicality of the streets, but the enduring power of human will and connection, and the ghosts of love.

• Reflection title: What Will Remain?
• Creative inspiration: Walt Whitman, "Once I Passed Through a Populous City"
• Reflection Question: Where have I been where no memories remain but the love I felt? Where will I go next and with whom?

May: On Love

May 18

Today's reflection was inspired by a quote from the video game Unravel Two.

There will come a time when you reach a wall that only your partner has the strength to climb. Or you come to a crevasse that only you have the skill to leap across. 

They climb the wall, turn with a smile, and pull you up after them. You make it across to the other side and tell them to jump—to trust that you’ll pull your string, giving them the extra speed they need to get across.

These strings—these bonds—do not hold you back. These bonds of love are sometimes the only thing you’ll have to make it out of those inevitable times of hardship and darkness. Because you’ll go through them, and your loved one and me and everyone else. 

Just don’t forget to tug your string, asking for help when you need it. And don’t forget to wait for that tug from someone else and be ready to offer your hand.

Climb higher together. Build anew. And love, love, love.

• Reflection title: Tie Those Knots
• Creative inspiration: Unravel Two
• Reflection Question: Have I been looking at my bonds all wrong—as though they were holding me back when really, they’re there to lift me up?

May: On Love

May 17

Today's reflection was inspired by a quote from Martin Luther King Jr., in particular from A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches.

If you’ve been hurt or wronged, choosing love can be one of the most difficult things to do. 

Choosing compassion over judgment, empathy over resentment, kindness over cruelty might seem a herculean task. Or to some, even idealistic. 

But it is possible. 

Look at those who have come before and faced far worse brutality and inhumanity and still found it in their hearts to love. Yes, it is possible. But it is also a choice—one that does not come easy or without deliberate teaching, studying, training. 

And it is also a choice that is worth it. One that will send ripples into the world far beyond what you’ll ever be able to see. 

Choosing to love can be one of the most difficult things to do, until it isn’t.

• Reflection title: Keep the Tree Alive
• Creative inspiration: Martin Luther King Jr., A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches
• Reflection Question: What must I put down so that I can carry more love?

May: On Love

May 16

Today's reflection was inspired by a poem by Matsuo Bashō.

You live your life, you think, according to what you want to do, or perhaps should do, or what others tell you to do. This goes with being an active participant in society.

But when was the last time you slowed down enough, left your screens and job and whatever might demand your attention for a time to just be? If only even for a minute or two. If only for a moment?

When was the last time you made time for the important things in life, like snow-viewing with the ones you love? 

Are you spending too much time on things that just . . . don't matter?

• Reflection title: Watch the Snow
• Creative inspiration: Matsuo Bashō, 132
• Reflection Question: Am I making time for the important things—like snow-viewing—with the ones I love? Or am I spending too much time doing things that don’t really matter?

May: On Love

May 15

Today's reflection was inspired by a quote from Thomas Merton's book No Man Is an Island.

Sometimes it takes a lot of trial and error to figure out the secret: that love—real love—is a radical acceptance of your friend, family member, or partner. It’s not liking the same things. It’s not running in the same crowd. It’s not about sharing the same physical space day after day. It’s not loving someone for the potential you believe they have, or for the expectations you’ve set for them in your mind. It’s not about trying to reshape them to better fit your personality or your needs. It’s loving them for who they are. Right here and right now.

And besides, if you really loved them, why would you want them to be more like you? Why would you want to change them?

You wouldn’t.* 

*Unless, of course, they were actively harming themselves or others.

• Reflection title: Love Them for Who They Are
• Creative inspiration: Thomas Merton, No Man Is an Island
• Reflection Question: Do I love my partner, my friends, my children, and my family for who they are now—not for who I want them to be? Not for who I imagine they could become if they just changed this or that?

May: On Love

May 14

Today's reflection was inspired by the poem "A Dandelion for My Mother" by Jean Nordhaus.

The resilient and unassuming dandelion. A symbol of love and life.

It holds more love in it than the diamonds mined from the bowels of the earth by exploited hands.

It will hold strong in the face of poison and death and find ways on the wind to new life.

It will offer the chance to wish to a little child, for it exists for all such natural things.

• Reflection title: It Will Be So
• Creative inspiration: Jean Nordhaus, "A Dandelion for My Mother"
• Reflection Question: What can I learn of love and life from the stubborn resilience and beauty of the dandelion? What event in my life needs resilience and love to endure and overcome?

May: On Love

May 13

Today's reflection was inspired by a quote from Final Fantasy VIII.

Unlike Keats’ Bold Lover from yesterday, you can’t make time stand still. You can’t live eternally in anticipation, but seeing that and knowing it is a gift, because you can recognize the moment when it’s here—each and every moment. The meeting. The seconds leading up to the kiss. The kiss itself. And the parting. Each is sacred. Each is a sentence on a page in the book of your life. So when you have those special moments with your loved ones, recognize it—say the words: I want the present to stand still, knowing full well it will never happen, but you can relish in the fact that you even experienced it in the first place. 

It’s the fleeting nature of the moment that makes it so special—so accept that it won’t stay, but don’t let it slip away either.

• Reflection title: You Don’t Have To Let It Slip Away
• Creative inspiration: Final Fantasy VIII
• Reflection Question: Do I acknowledge the wonderful and fleeting moments in my life with those I love? Or do I take them for granted, believing I’ll always have more?

May: On Love

May 12

Today's reflection was inspired by John Keats' poem "Ode on a Grecian Urn."

What if it’s neither the journey nor the destination? 

In Big Panda and Tiny Dragon by James Norbury, Big Panda asks, “Which is more important, the journey or the destination?” To which Tiny Dragon replies, “The company.” So you have to ask—would Keats’ Bold Lover be satisfied living frozen in time just nearing the kiss if it weren’t with someone they loved? Someone they couldn’t stand the thought of not kissing? 

And what would your journey through life toward death be like without those you love along for the ride? You might travel to beautiful places, savor delicacies, or hear the sweetest melodies—which is all well and good—but wouldn’t it be better if those you love were right there with you?

• Reflection title: Journey? Destination? Or Something Else?
• Creative inspiration: John Keats, "Ode on a Grecian Urn"
• Reflection Question: Have I been too fixated on the destination? Or a destination and not enough on the ones I love who are with me?

May: On Love

May 11

Today's reflection was inspired by a quote from Terry Pratchett's novel Sourcery.

Love—it’s what makes the world go round. And it’s what allows us to survive on that same world made of rock and water, hurtling around the sun at 67,000 mph. 

Love is a beautiful thing to have, and some of the pragmatists or cynics out there might say, “Eh, it’s fine. But it’s a luxury. You don’t really need it.” 

And to that, I say, “Nay, it is essential in how it binds us together socially, emotionally, and even biologically. It’s how we survive this—whatever this is. It’s what makes life worth living.” 

• Reflection title: Where Would We Be Without It?
• Creative inspiration: Terry Pratchett, Sourcery
• Reflection Question: What will I do to spread the love today?