“Tommy Doyle could have just gone to therapy, but we’re glad he didn’t.”

This week’s scariest horror movie is... Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers. This film has everything: children wielding knives, planets slowly coming into alignment, and one of the best places to give birth to a demon child. If you love Dr. Myers OBGYN, Religious Cults, and bringing a knife to a slap fight, this episode’s for you!

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Up Next: ThanksKilling (2008)

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“It’s like an angsty teenager blew up because it was forced to shower.”

This week’s scariest listener request movie is... Alien 3. This film has everything: A soon to be star director getting screwed by the studio, An unsexy prison monk scenario, AND that prison is still somehow safer for Ripley than any church. If you love industrial dread, prison monks, and men in rubber suits, this episode’s for you!

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Up Next: Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)

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“You might say those two guys have a hand job.”

This week’s scariest meta movie is... Wes Craven’s New Nightmare. This film has everything: a murderous Thing hand, terrible sex toy suggestions, And the craziest Mangione theory you’ve ever heard. If you love runaway limbs, ill-advised bedroom gadgets, and the truth finally getting out there, this episode’s for you!

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What did you think of our episode on Wes Craven’s New Nightmare? Tell us on social media @HorrorVirgin or @RomancingThePodShow on Facebook and Instagram, or @HorrorVirginPod / @RomancingPodSho on Twitter.

Up Next: Alien 3 (1992)

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“I don’t remember A Bug’s Life having this much religion in it.”

This week’s scariest horror movie is... Exorcist II: The Heretic. This film has everything: a locust DJ, a shaman/scientist in a lab coat. a vibe that is way to much star wars to be as bad as it is. If you love bug-fueled bangers and shamanic science whiplash this episode’s for you!

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Up Next: Wes Craven's New Nightmare (1994)

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“All I saw was a feel-good film about an aunt who loved her nephew so much she’d stop at nothing to plan a sleepover for him.”

This week’s most chaotic PTA-nightmare horror movie is... Weapons. This film has everything: heat-seeking children, Thumbs Up Seven Up, And the strangest fast food theories since everyone stopped using the playplaces but know one talks about why. If you love feral playground energy and fast-food lore gone wrong, this episode’s for you!

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Up Next: Exorcist 2: The Heretic (1977)

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This week’s wiggiest horror movie is... Van Helsing.

This film has everything: a wig that out-monsters the monsters, an electrical Wonka, And a that might be having a little bit too much fun. If you love catastrophic hair, candy-coated mad science, and truly maximalist nonsense, this episode’s for you!

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Up Next: Weapons (2025)

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“This is the first time that Nicolas Cage has ever been stopped by a circle of cocaine.”

This week’s nastiest toxic-boss horror movie is… Renfield. This film has everything: Corporate Dracula, Welcome-Mat Vampire Law, and the most truthful line ever yelled at the police at the beginning of a chase. If you love quitting your immortal boss, doormat loopholes, and Ben Schwartz on pharmacy time, this episode’s for you!

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Up Next: Van Helsing (2004)

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“He is just shipping himself with snacks.”

This week’s bougiest coffin-cruise horror movie is… The Last Voyage of the Demeter. This film has everything: a vampire who mails himself across Europe with provisions. Blood bag wisdom brought to you by Snapple. And an idea for a Dracula movie so brave it will never happen… again. If you love bougie undead meal prep and blockbuster pitches that should absolutely not be greenlit, this episode’s for you!

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Up Next: Renfield (2023)

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“This is why we shouldn’t have made women wear corsets.”

This week’s prettiest fever dream is… Nosferatu. This film has everything: a naked blood-circle fax machine. Some of the absolute worst period-accurate hair. And a villain that edges so hard when he final gets what he's after it, literally kills him. If you love moody gothic vibes, unexplainable vampire etiquette, and horny morality tales, this episode’s for you!

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Up Next: The Last Voyage of the Demeter (2023)

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“My dick is encased in wax. It’s the ultimate condom.”

This week’s horniest fire hazard of a horror movie is House of Wax. This film has everything: wax-on-wax violence, Quentin Tarantino’s evil twin, and smoldering chemistry only ruined by shared parentage. If you love incestual tension, foot trauma, and the slowest wax-based final fight in horror history, this episode’s for you!

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Up Next: Nosferatu (2024)

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