Lunchables may be bad for you, kids have about a half hour attention span, we all fall for tourist traps and don't buy sex toys off of Facebook!

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Tax day baby! Guys need to do better with our oral hygiene, golf season has started, apparently we want to sleep with robots and our pets give us all the joy apparently. 

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O.J. died, chocolate will soon only be for the elite, working out in the evening may be just what you need and bro, we eat some serious grilled cheese in this country. 

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Some of us haven't felt healthy in a year, writing down your anger might help you out a bit, we have a new pickle treat, Panera is making huge menu changes and being lonely could lead you down a darker path....one that could end in having your own radio show!

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iPhone privacy is not a thing, Nature Made had made gummy vitamins even less attractive, Walmart was caught overcharging, I finally got a lawnmower and it turns out, mathematically retirement may be impossible!

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Morgan Wallen had a rough weekend, Pat Sajak has hosted his final show, Crocs and Kellogg's have teamed up for clown shoes, Borat is single and man, how about that eclipse?!

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Back after vacation! If you know one thing about this show it's that we NEVER miss an eclipse!

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Just a quick programming note: We're off until April 8. Your regularly scheduled Index will be back rested, relaxed and in full mediocrity! 

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The stock market is up, Diddy is having a pretty bad time these days (lol), Crown Royal Blackberry is a thing and man oh man if I hit the Powerball this is your last index ever!

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Kevin Bacon is doing something cool for 40 years of "Footloose," we love our snacks and we're loyal as Hell to them, church is down, the Mega Millions tonight is up. Way, way up. 

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