Thirty years after The Five Love Languages reshaped how we talk about relationships, Dr. Gary Chapman joins John and me to revisit the core question that matters most: Do the people you love actually feel loved?

This episode kicks off our month-long series with Dr. Chapman—a deep dive into the love languages that becomes a master class in how we give and receive love.

We unpack the five love languages, the idea of the “love tank,” and why good intentions aren’t enough. This episode sets the foundation for the entire series and reframes how we think about love, connection, and effort.

Life Happens. Let’s talk about it.

Listen in to learn more:

[0:00:34] Timeless Impact of the Five Love Languages
[0:07:59] The Five Love Languages, Clearly Defined
[0:11:31] The Love Tank and the 5:1 Magic Ratio
[0:16:19] How to Check Your Partner’s Love Tank Level
[0:18:07] Simple Ways to Discover Someone’s Love Language

In this episode, we are diving into an overview of the five love languages, why it is important to know your love language, how to figure out your partner’s love language, the love tank metaphor and why it matters, the magic ratio of negative to positive interactions with your loved ones, one check in question to ask your partner, and the love language that matters most.

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We want to protect our kids from the awkwardness, heartbreak, and intensity of teen dating. But what if avoiding it altogether is actually doing more harm than good?

In this episode, I’m joined by therapists Sissy Goff and David Thomas to make a compelling case for why healthy, age-appropriate dating is necessary—not optional—for emotional and relational development.

We talk about dating as skill development: learning how to communicate, set boundaries, handle rejection, pace relationships, and maintain a sense of self. These are skills kids don’t magically acquire in adulthood—and when dating is delayed or forbidden, many are left unprepared.

We also unpack how parents can stay appropriately involved while we’re still close enough to guide them.

This is a reassuring, practical conversation for all of us parents who feel conflicted—wanting to protect their kids, but also wanting to prepare them for real life. 

Life Happens. Let’s Talk About It. 

Listen in to learn more:

[3:39] The Dating Age Debate 

[11:10] Dating Builds Life Skills

[29:48]Tech, Texts, and Emotional Tangles

[41:15] Healthy Boundaries & Family Rules

In this episode, we are digging into wisdom for starting teen dating conversations, a healthy approach to intimacy, practicing relationship building skills, concerns about teen dating, teaching our kids how they deserve to be treated in friendship and dating relationships, having realistic expectations of teen relationships, relieving pressure from teen dating, healthy boundaries for teen dating, appropriate pacing in relationship and developing social skills, helping teens foster healthy friendships, and modeling healthy relationships for our kids of all ages.

LINKS

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The teen mental health crisis can no longer be ignored. Anxiety, depression, attention issues, and suicidal ideation are rising—and the science is increasingly clear about the role screens are playing in reshaping our kids’ brains.

As we continue to revisit our most talked-about conversations from 2025, this remains one of the most shared and downloaded.

In this episode, I’m joined by Sissy Goff, therapist and Executive Director of Daystar Counseling, and Niro Feliciano, cognitive psychotherapist, wife, and mom of four. Together, we break down how technology and algorithms hijack neurochemistry, create unhealthy dopamine cycles, and impact attention, sleep, and emotional regulation.

We also talk about what parents can do—how to set healthy boundaries, what warning signs to watch for, and why there is real reason for hope. 

I also share why I’m choosing not to give my youngest a phone—and why just because you did it with one child doesn’t mean you have to do it again.

This is an empowering, practical conversation for anyone raising kids in a world that never logs off.

Life Happens. Let’s Talk About It. 

Listen in to learn more:

[4:13] Gender Differences & Social Media Effects

[7:06] Developmental Setbacks from Tech and Pandemic

[12:43] Dopamine Deficit and Screen Time

[27:44] Parental Strategies and Boundaries

In this episode, we are diving into how anxiety presents differently for boys and girls, the impact of technology on teen social and emotional development, the correlation between teen mental health issues and technology, what technology and social media are doing to teen brains, signs and symptoms of mental health concerns in teens, research on dopamine and brain chemistry, navigating conversations around social media and phones with teens, making changes to how you handle phones and social media within your family, and healthy boundaries for social media and technology.

LINKS :

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https://www.instagram.com/sissygoff/?hl=en 

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https://www.instagram.com/niro_feliciano/?hl=en

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January is our “greatest hits” month—and this conversation with Dr. Jen Ashton and Aarti Sequeira remains one of the most shared and talked-about episodes of 2025.

Perimenopause is messy, misunderstood, and wildly under-discussed—even though it can last a decade or more and affect nearly every system in the body. I’ve been going through it for 12 years…and counting! 

In this episode, we get real about what perimenopause actually looks like in real life: brain fog, sleep disruption, rage, hormone chaos, and that unsettling feeling of “I don’t feel like myself anymore.”

Dr. Jen explains why the most significant changes happen during perimenopause—not after menopause—and why women deserve better information, better research, and better care. We also explore why this season can be both destabilizing and deeply empowering. It’s not about fear. It’s about reclaiming agency in a phase of life that too often goes unexplained. 

If you’ve ever wondered, “Is this normal?” or “Why didn’t anyone tell me about this?”—this conversation is for you.

Life Happens. Let’s Talk About It. 

Listen in to learn more : 

[0:00:57] - Changing Perceptions of Perimenopause

[0:01:05] - Consistency and the Connectivity Challenge

[0:06:36] - Hormonal Changes During Perimenopause

[0:12:03] - Gender Equity and Research Funding

[0:22:47] - Challenging Perimenopause Victim Narratives

Listen to the entire Perimenopause Series here: 

Ep 1 Perimenopause: The real change

Ep 2  Perimenopause: How to prepare 

Ep 3  Perimenopause: What no one is saying about GLP-1’s

Ep 4  Perimenopause: Is Testosterone the game-changer women need

Ep 5 Perimenopause: Why ages 45-50 are so risky for women and how to get help

In this episode, we are diving into honest conversations about perimenopause, three major changes a woman goes through in her lifetime, why the changes in perimenopause feel so monumental, current research on women’s health, the pros and cons of western medicine and the American healthcare system, advocating for ourselves, and taking responsibility for our own health.

LINKS

Get Paula’s Personal Newsletter  

https://www.paulafarisofficial.com/newsletter 

Connect with Paula on Instagram 

https://www.instagram.com/paulafaris/?hl=en 

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Meet Dr Jen

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What if midlife isn’t a slow fade into invisibility, but the most confident, ridiculous, and joyful chapter yet?

All month long in January, we’re revisiting the best of our most downloaded, most shared, and most talked-about conversations from 2025—and this episode is a true greatest hit.

In this laugh-out-loud conversation, I’m talking with the wildly relatable Peaches of Peaches and Diesel 104, the Instagram phenom who’s turned Gen X midlife into must-watch comedy. From menopause mishaps and rogue eyebrow hairs to empty nesting, friendship, marriage, and saying “yes” to absolutely absurd ideas (Dateline murder binders, wedding dress try-ons, goat yoga—yes, really), nothing is off-limits.

Peaches shares how her platform unexpectedly blew up during the pandemic, why women in midlife are more powerful (and less apologetic) than ever, and how humor and friendship can carry us through big transitions—menopause included. 

Life Happens. Let’s Talk About It. 

🎧 Bonus tip: This episode includes plenty of visual “show and tell,” so be sure to watch it on YouTube for the full experience!

Listen in to learn more: 

(3:15) Midlife Isn’t Decline — It’s Confidence, Freedom, and Trying New Things

(8:40) Laughter and Levity Are Essential Tools for This Season of Life

(24:30) Empty Nesting Requires Investing in Your Marriage, Not Just Your Kids

(37:50) Menopause & Perimenopause: Normalize the Symptoms and Stop the Shame

(52:10) Friendship in Midlife Matters More Than Ever — Seek Connection and Say Yes

In this episode, we are digging into the power of saying yes and trying new things, stepping out of your comfort zone, embracing what makes you unique, finding humor and joy in midlife, what it’s like to be an empty nester, encouragement for navigating menopause, staying healthy and having fun as we age, and the importance of friendship in midlife.

In this episode, we are digging into finding humor and joy in midlife, what it’s like to be an empty nester, saying yes to things that bring you joy, being willing to try something new, navigating menopause, and the importance of friendship in midlife. 

My Favorite Weighted Vest

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As we head into the season of gathering, giving… and gritting our teeth at the dinner table, we’re revisiting one of my most popular conversations — with Harvard happiness expert, Professor Arthur Brooks. The research is clear: the happiest people in the world have one thing in common — strong family connections.

But what if your family drives you nuts? What if the group chat is a minefield and you’re already bracing yourself for Aunt Marge’s political monologue?

If you struggle with family dynamics, you’re not alone. It’s normal.

In this episode, we unpack why we need our families even when we don’t always like them, the neurobiological wiring that keeps us connected, and why conflict doesn’t mean failure. If you’re heading into this season with mixed emotions, this one will help you navigate the tension. 

Life Happens. Let’s Talk About It. 

Listen in to learn more

(0:30) — Family dynamics

(1:40) — Happiness / “science of happiness”

(10:30) — Neurobiological connection / sense of self

(14:50) — “Love without liking”

(25:30) — Conflict vs. schism (estrangement)

SUMMARY

In this episode, we are diving into estrangement in families, expectations in parenting and family relationships, the differences between family connections and friendships (and why we need both!), the science of how family connects us to a sense of self, how much effort you should put into family relationships, common challenges that make family life complicated, the difference between conflict and schism in relationships, a call back to intergenerational living, and advice for managing conflict in family relationships. 

Sponsor : Cozy Earth – Luxury Bedding and Loungewear 

Cozy Earth offers luxury bedding and loungewear known for its incredible softness and temperature regulation. Browse today. Never worry about sleeping hot again!

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Connect with Professor Arthur Brooks 

 ​​https://arthurbrooks.com/meet-arthur 

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In part two of our annual Ask Us Anything series, John and I tackle your questions about the messy world of parenting, surviving the holidays, and what life really looks like after stepping away from TV.

We get into all of it — how we handled (and mishandled) the sex talk with our kids, why the teenage years nearly broke us (and what ultimately helped), and the backwards parenting advice we wish we could give our 30-year-old selves. We also talk holiday traditions and how unprepared we actually are every December.

It’s very us — flannels, real talk, and all. 

Life Happens. Let’s Talk About It. 

Listen in to learn more :

(04:30)  How to Handle “The Sex Talk” With Kids

(12:00) Holiday Stress, Traditions & the Reality of Being Unprepared

(20:30) Parenting Advice for Your 30s: Let Them Fail Forward

(30:30) Surviving the Teen Years & Planned Emancipation

(44:30)College Search, Leaving New York & Life Reset Reflections

In this episode, we are digging into holiday prep and holiday traditions, parenting advice for parents in the little years, tough parenting seasons and coming out on the other side, parenting as partners, helping our teens make college decisions, and taking the risk to start over in a new place.

Sponsor: Cozy Earth – Luxury Bedding and Loungewear 

Cozy Earth offers luxury bedding and loungewear known for its incredible softness and temperature regulation. Browse today. Never worry about sleeping hot again!

Head to ⁠cozyearth.com⁠ and use my code PAULA for up to  40% off!

Want to advertise on my show? Link HERE

Sign up to receive Paula’s email, where she keeps it real about what it’s like being a parent in America. And, if you’re a working mom, make sure you’re getting The CARRY ALL email, the load-lessening newsletter for and by working moms. 

Connect with John

Please donate today to Mercy Ships. 

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It’s that time of year again—our annual Ask Us Anything episodes, where John and I answer your questions with zero prep (on his part), lots of honesty, and the usual amount of chaos. In Part 1, we tackle everything from marriage in midlife to Michigan football, GLP-1 meds, the best trip we took this year, and the places we still dream of traveling.

You’ll hear why I refuse to watch Michigan–Ohio State with other humans, the memoir John believes he’s writing, my experience with GLP-1s, and how we’re navigating big changes together.

It’s unfiltered, unscripted, and very us: a little marriage therapy, a little sports talk, a little midlife crisis, and a lot of laughter.

Part 2 drops next week!

Life Happens. Let’s Talk About It. 

Listen in to learn more: (06:20) College Choices and Family Dynamics 

(13:54) Considering Weight Loss and Inflammation 

(19:24) The Importance of Perseverance 

(24:25) Navigating Marriage Challenges and Intimacy 

(29:08) “Quality Time “

In this episode, we are digging into the best way to watch the Michigan-Ohio State rivalry game, our favorite travel experiences and places we dream of going, the pros and cons of GLP-1s, why commitment is key to a strong marriage, the power of forgiveness, how to keep your relationship strong after many years together, and what women wish men knew about intimacy. 

Sponsor: Cozy Earth – Luxury Bedding and Loungewear 

Cozy Earth offers luxury bedding and loungewear known for its incredible softness and temperature regulation. Browse today. Never worry about sleeping hot again!

Head to ⁠cozyearth.com⁠ and use my code PAULA for up to  40% off!

Want to advertise on my show? Link HERE

Sign up to receive Paula’s email, where she keeps it real about what it’s like being a parent in America. And, if you’re a working mom, make sure you’re getting The CARRY ALL email, the load-lessening newsletter for and by working moms. 

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In the final episode of our midlife series, John, Liz, and I dig into what it looks like to not just add years to our life, but to add more LIFE to our YEARS.

Liz introduces this fascinating idea of social health—and trust me, it’s not what you think. According to the research, your relationships may matter more to your longevity than your workout routine, your diet, or even your genetics!!

We explore stretching your mind, body, and yes…your comfort zone. And of course, we settle the burning question: who’s going to outlive whom: Me or John? (Spoiler: the debate gets heated.)

If midlife has you rethinking how you want to show up, this episode will give you a hopeful, practical place to start.

Life Happens. Let’s Talk About It. 

Listen in to learn more: 

(01:41) Midlife Revelation 

(05:40) Memory, Experience, and Communication Skills 

(14:35) Numbing Pain With Consumption and Technology 

(20:06) Preparing for Quality Last Decade 

(25:37) Improving Cognitive and Social Health 

In this episode, we are diving into abilities that improve with age, one surprising factor that influences the length and quality of lives, why our social health and relationships are as important as our physical and mental health for longevity, why independence is not always a good thing, and how to continue to build resilience as we age. 

Sponsor : Cozy Earth – Luxury Bedding and Loungewear 

Cozy Earth offers luxury bedding and loungewear known for its incredible softness and temperature regulation. Browse today. Never worry about sleeping hot again!

Head to ⁠cozyearth.com⁠ and use my code PAULA for up to  40% off!

Want to advertise on my show? Link HERE

Sign up to receive Paula’s email where she keeps it real about what it’s like being a parent in America. And, if you’re a working mom, make sure you’re getting The CARRY ALL email, the load-lessening newsletter for and by working moms. 

Connect with Liz Bohannon

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Some people call it a midlife crisis. I’m calling mine a midlife evaluation. 

Continuing our month-long series on MIDLIFE, we’re sharing the unexpected (and slightly hilarious) ways our “evaluations” have shown up: from tattoos, to a concealed weapons permit that’s never been used, and a Jeep lifted high enough to require a stretch routine.

Liz, John, and I unpack why this season hits so hard—especially for women—and why the language we use to describe it actually shapes how we experience it. Instead of imagining midlife as the beginning of the end, we talk about reframing it as the beginning of the good stuff: the part of the rollercoaster where the ride gets fast, wild, and surprisingly fun.

Life Happens. Let’s Talk About It. 

Listen in to learn more :

(00:00) Midlife Surprises and Laughter 

(10:01) Avoiding Midlife Crisis Through Reflection 

(12:42) Nervous Anticipation of Kids Leaving 

(23:48) Numbing Midlife Unraveling

In this episode, we are digging into defining a midlife crisis, things that can trigger a midlife crisis, the importance of reflection and taking time to reevaluate our lives, cultural changes in how we think about aging, why the stories we tell ourselves matter, reevaluating what success looks like, and why a midlife crisis is not always a bad thing. 

Sponsor: Cozy Earth – Luxury Bedding and Loungewear 

Cozy Earth offers luxury bedding and loungewear known for its incredible softness and temperature regulation. Browse today. Never worry about sleeping hot again!

Head to ⁠cozyearth.com ⁠ and use my code PAULA for up to  40% off!

Want to advertise on my show? Link HERE

Sign up to receive Paula’s email, where she keeps it real about what it’s like being a parent in America. And, if you’re a working mom, make sure you’re getting The CARRY ALL email, the load-lessening newsletter for and by working moms. 

Connect with Liz Bohannon

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