This week Kati talks about the ripple effects of being a parentified child, and how that can leave us wanting to not become an adult. She also addresses recovery after a suicide attempt, major life decisions and our mental health, and whether or not we can trust repressed trauma memories. She also explains dissociation, processing trauma when therapy was what traumatized us, and touch aversion in autism and relationships. Finally, Kati discusses whether or not attachment and intimacy issues can be self inflicted, how to get out of a marital rut, and whether or not mental illness is a choice. Hopefully some of her insights and thoughts on these issues are helpful in your own life journey!

Ask Kati Anything ep. 128 | Your mental health podcast, with Kati Morton, LMFT

Audience questions:

1. How do adults who suffered childhood emotional neglect, abuse and parentification deal with being an adult, taking responsibility and being self-reliant, things that are potentially triggering and throw you back into childhood patterns? It feels like taking responsibility and being self-reliant was...

2. Could you talk about recovery after a suicide attempt please? Even if you are glad you survived, all the factors in your life that caused you to get to that point still exist so how is it possible to get better? Especially since it seems impossible to tell anyone about what happened...

3. I am wondering how do you make major life decisions that impact your future while you’re struggling to take care of your mental health in the present? For my specific example, how do I know if staying in university is worth my rapidly declining mental health? I have been taking my...

4. I hope your day is going great. My question is about repressed trauma memories. How can we tell if they are real or not? For context, I have a very strong imagination and tend to imagine myself in bad situations, or make up scenarios where bad things happened to me as a...

5. I want to ask about dissociation during sexual assault! I was sexually assaulted by my brother years ago. He was 1 year younger than me.. I was sleeping and had a freeze response (I was 15) and didn’t do anything about it. He doesn’t even know that I know:), he didn’t do it again, but he...

6. I am autistic and sometimes worry about how my sensitivity to touch could potentially affect future intimate relationships. I have never dated anyone and question if it’s okay to engage in intimate acts despite not really desiring sex just to please your partner. Are there any damaging...

7. Can attachment/intimacy issues be unintentionally self-inflicted? Why or why not, and what would the healing process be? My parents are great and I feel genuinely blessed to have them, but I get angry when they offer any kind affection, attention or show concern for me in any way. This...

8. I feel like I’m in such a rut with my husband. I’m by no means a short tempered person, but lately my fuse is nonexistent. We’ve been financially secure until recently when the prices of everything skyrocketed. We no longer have funds to do things or go places...

9. How do I begin to heal from a trauma when it was therapy itself that was traumatizing? In January, after an involuntarily hospitalization that shouldn't have happened (was never suicidal, homicidal, or psychotic) I was given a BPD diagnosis (despite having no history of active suicidality, self harm, or anger issues, due to CPTSD not being in the DSM) and "dumped" by...

10. Where is the line between mental illness and choice? We can't choose what happens to us, but we are reminded over and over that we can choose how we respond to what happens to us, that we can choose our attitude and choose our behaviors. If this is true, then isn't my "mental illness"...