The Rum Runnas Podcast

On this week’s episode Jarred and Kyle discuss the weirdest and most interesting news articles from all over the internet, covering everything from: A Floridaman disrespectfully eating a Key Lime Pie and then getting into a food fight with his elderly roommate (Also a really good recipe for Key Lime Pie), AU woman runs tries to run boyfriend over for trying to eat her chips (he takes full responsibility for his mistake though), nearly invincible super pigs from Canada are invading the US, and an Irish chicken with a violent past killed it's owner (or his roommate did it and framed the poor John Wick of Chickens, people don't ask enough questions).

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Featured Stories / Sources:

How does one eat pie disrespectfully / NBC:

https://nbc-2.com/news/weird/2023/02/17/fort-myers-man-arrested-after-disrespectfully-consuming-key-lime-pie/

Don't Touch the Ladies Food / 9News:

https://www.9news.com.au/national/woman-faces-court-accused-of-trying-to-run-down-partner-in-adelaide-after-argument/7df3fc86-5ed7-48df-9001-e06e12edf96e

Invincible Super Pigs / Popular Mechanics: 

http://popm.ch/oblX5GI?fbclid=IwAR25g-DJrGnKkWhvXBSIcsaeSw__al5Pq668LlyNypCixhxnMZgR_64Kq00&mibextid=Zxz2cZ

I’m a Rooster with a Bad Attitude and Checkered Past / Fox News:

https://www.foxnews.com/world/irish-rooster-violent-past-kills-man-attack-back-leg-court.amp?fbclid=IwAR1SmsMqkjBvOY2W6gjDfrh0U5GIqaqDb6f1PX6XnMXnSfhSl8MujwinitU

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On this week’s episode Jarred and Kyle discuss the weirdest and most interesting news articles from all over the internet, covering everything from: A brand new drug free pill that vibrates to cure constipation (we honestly don't know how it works but it must feel like swallowing bees), a TN man uses a cat to attack officers that attempted to arrest him, a Brazilian Lawyer Doctor gets shot by his own gun due to an MRI (4 working theories ranking from Embarrassment, Final Destination, Vengeful Ghost, or Invisible Hit Squad...all equally valid), and WI woman that killed and dismembered her boyfriend attacks her lawyer (either helping or hurting her mentally incapable plea). And have we mentioned #FuckWendy's!

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Featured Stories / Sources:

How Does This Butt Pill Work?! / WSAZ:

https://www.wsaz.com/2023/02/08/drug-free-relief-chronic-constipation-may-come-form-vibrating-pill/?utm_source&fbclid=IwAR0giBJoidJCuYyvuZ7UUvy-YS-acnjKExSTfojMSQ1Hj2QmetVsSVPHM40&mibextid=Zxz2cZ#lea6puxj5wh4lhp1az

Activate Attack Cat / WSMV:

https://www.wsmv.com/2023/02/09/man-uses-cat-attack-officers-downtown-nashville-police-say/?fbclid=IwAR18wfNBwRUrz1-Nj-Svk4e8Hgh4ZvObTeFv5RGupEEI71qy6FGcN_Tuxgw&mibextid=Zxz2cZ#lea6qk41ihkd8yu0aei

Final Destinationed / MSN:

https://www.msn.com/en-us/health/medical/lawyer-dies-after-gun-triggered-by-hospital-mri-scanner/ar-AA17inns?ocid=msedgntp&cvid=afb85a47d5204e97986315135a1f3192&utm_source&fbclid=IwAR2qeDxeQ-Rr4t85gOAqeXvv898P1vjlpG3cYO39UKJ-klgITOZsv91l22M&mibextid=Zxz2cZ

She's Crazy But This Probably Wont Help / MSN:

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/woman-accused-of-decapitating-lover-attacks-own-attorney-in-court/ar-AA17ux8y?fbclid=IwAR0hcxomrB7SdEO0ypWbIX2rvwaTPPwKcFsZpHZMA1eoBBq4RWNe18ME7RI&mibextid=Zxz2cZ

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On this week’s episode Jarred and Kyle discuss the weirdest and most interesting news articles from all over the internet, covering everything from: Japan cracking down on anime counterfeit illegal body pillow cover sales, the Royal Navy kinda mad about one of their nuclear subs being fixed with glue (Maybe it was Flex-Seal), Floridaman bites the head off of a python during a domestic disturbance (play our favorite Floridaman Game: Meth, Flakka or Bath Salts), and a Teen boy wanted to experiment and decided the best tool for the job as a golf ball and it didn't go well (Don't stick stuff up your butt that doesn't have a handle).

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Featured Stories / Sources:

Not the Waifus / Japan Today:

https://japantoday.com/category/crime/japanese-police-file-charges-against-illegal-anime-girl-huggy-pillow-cover-seller-1?mibextid=S66gvF

Flexseal can fix any Damage / The Guardian:

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2023/feb/01/royal-navy-orders-investigation-into-nuclear-submarine-repaired-with-glue?CMP=Share_AndroidApp_Other&fbclid=IwAR2MRctdR65rsANaaVTJpY-e4Yu_8rqPCBc67P15lT4nA3LBLMmGxyB_ICg&mibextid=Zxz2cZ

Floridaman Decided Snakes for Dinner / Local 10 News:

https://www.local10.com/news/local/2023/01/31/cutler-bay-man-bites-off-pythons-head-in-domestic-dispute-police-say/?utm_source&fbclid=IwAR1vcqIZb_sm7clLxFtI6ggsP--IrUAlNaP5laJ640p_lmWkOzg_Geo7e_E&mibextid=S66gvF

Butt Hole in 1 / The NY Post:

https://nypost.com/2023/02/01/teen-lands-bizarre-hole-in-one-in-his-butt-how-docs-got-it-out/amp/?fbclid=IwAR3EcKuUEaCHTOBv4B5nnmEzQ30lj1BTvPyrXRRkKvL0l1ecJtyP3uV4q5M&mibextid=Zxz2cZ

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On this week’s episode Jarred and Kyle discuss the weirdest and most interesting news articles from all over the internet, covering everything from: Fish using their owner's switch to steal their credit card information (also they are Streamers and can beat Pokemon), an Australian mining company losing radioactive materials somewhere over 1400km (definitely getting even scarier Australian animals from this), a Chicago woman is in trouble for stabbing 4 random people right after getting out on bail for stabbing a random person (if at first you don't succeed stab stab again), and tech company CEO is in hot water after quoting MLK in an email laying off 7% of their workforce (for doing such a good job and proving how good of a leader she is).

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Featured Stories / Sources:

Fish Crimes/ Techspot: 

https://www.techspot.com/news/97334-pet-fish-commits-credit-card-fraud-owner-using.html?fbclid=IwAR2N7Zf90AsbrPq3vwBexmDWcQX6c2NPPxpBwb3cKdiw5YEtkUOUmfePczE&mibextid=Zxz2cZ

If you find it please don’t touch/ AP News: 

https://apnews.com/article/science-oddities-australia-government-perth-western-d44bde9c94e68ff4e22820474b67e832?fbclid=IwAR2EW9TYXKSlIvoZdpScC4Cf-Bywik3WDzWi_CGtBU2RCQJdA8utP0VGDj0&mibextid=Zxz2cZ

If at first you don’t succeed / CWB Chicago:

https://cwbchicago.com/2023/01/chicago-woman-randomly-stabbed-4-people-while-on-bail-for-randomly-stabbing-a-woman-in-bucktown-prosecutors-say.html?fbclid=IwAR0O7YG-c3utBgOsNR5EHEY8Lgl24D0Q6drFzFXqtq1oUnOXz5QDAn3_T50&mibextid=Zxz2cZ

I had a dream that none of you worked here / Fox 29: 

https://www.fox29.com/news/pagerduty-ceo-apologizes-for-quoting-martin-luther-king-jr-in-layoff-email-to-staff?utm_campaign=trueanthem&utm_medium=trueanthem&utm_source=facebook&fbclid=IwAR0iQ6cAEFvr25H_Ef7FF2LeXvdH9qyd7BIShLFBh6SqpcYV9ujXV60SxAo&mibextid=Zxz2cZ#ldnf21zo4lkfhf5hitx

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On this week’s episode Jarred and Kyle discuss the weirdest and most interesting news articles from all over the internet, covering everything from: IN man gets a true Happy Meal when he receives $5 in his McDonald's bag (oddly suspect and no one seems to be asking any more questions), MODOT is claiming unborn baby is employee to try to avoid lawsuit (apparently you can have more work experience than life experience), PA man threatens to blow up a courthouse and eat a sheriff (not even at a courthouse or talking to a sheriff we don't know why he even mentioned it), KS man is shot in the back by a dog (apparently not in his truck, not his dog, not his gun, not his day...Also there was a witness that was equally unhelpful. Pretty sure its a K9 assassin), Canadian Woman is suing arena for getting drunk and blowing up houses after crashing and causing $15Million in damage (Yeah it is that crazy!). Also Kyle has a brand new exciting and terrible business proposition; are you willing to invest in a mandatory and involuntary Sobering Room to be installed in all bars in America? Yeah didn't think so!

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Featured Stories / Sources:

5K Happy Meal / WSBT:

https://wsbt.com/news/local/elkhart-mcdonalds-mistakenly-gives-customer-5k-with-food-viral-video-tiktok-fast-food?utm_source&fbclid=IwAR3DVwfop7Pq8m2cDG1yhb_sKWAkvAy4QNXwgGY7siKdQqZRYvB9_fUuCMM&mibextid=Zxz2cZ

Apparently Not Too Young for Government Work / Fox News:

https://fox2now.com/news/fox-files/modot-argues-unborn-baby-in-fatal-work-zone-was-state-worker/?fbclid=IwAR1F2EtI6EVauhI6NiaaeLQapjDhMrCp8k9JHKM4A2whp5eoQw9Gjv0EuBM&mibextid=Zxz2cZ

Bomb Threat & Eat the Sheriff / WJACTV: https://wjactv.com/news/local/man-charged-for-threatening-to-blow-up-bedford-county-courthouse-eat-sheriff-psp-say?utm_source&fbclid=IwAR0sgwQ2H6BDWY_Wb_uZu0TDGj3xK60w5fbbF176_Z_jGntn7WBcln8GEGQ&mibextid=S66gvF

Doggy’s got a gun / SKY News:

https://news.sky.com/story/kansas-man-dies-after-being-shot-by-dog-in-truck-police-say-12794977

Why would you make me do that / Local 12:

https://local12.com/news/nation-world/woman-sues-concert-venue-drunk-driving-arrest-explosion-house-injuries-damages-destroyed-daniella-leis-shawn-budweiser-gardens-arena-london-ontario-marilyn-mansen-show?fbclid=IwAR1L_UFs7lLi9pRonIMGCzdqrUER4a4YzlmLREv67Vv0hFzOrapsPS4DtEg&mibextid=S66gvF#

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A special crossover episode between Rum Runnas Podcast, Dark Rum Podcast and Talk Shonen! Jarred, Kyle and Matt come together to talk about and give their opinion on a movie near and dear to Kyle's Heart: The Wraith (1986)! The guys discuss this 80's B-Movie starring Charlie Sheen all while reacting to it and rewatching it in real time as the show goes on. Hear their opinions, likes dislikes, gut reactions and reactions upon revisiting to this genre bending Horror/Sci-Fi/Action Revenge/Racing/Love Story. Full of cool 80's cars, ridiculous gang members, completely unnecessary nudity, little explanation, magic space alien tech, 80's SFX, and terrible brothers!

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Rum Runnas is currently in a time of transition and during that time production is bit more difficult, but here is a re-release of one of our hilarious previous episodes to hold you over until we're back up and running so check it out if you missed it the first time around or just revisit and enjoy.

On this week’s episode Jarred and Kyle discuss the weirdest and most interesting news articles from all over the internet, covering everything from: PETA making children's nursery rhymes more inclusive and aware of animals, MI 5th grader brings in weed gummies to the same school a kindergartner brought margaritas a few weeks earlier and a mother loses her mind over it and is now on a war path (all reason is out the window), OK woman tries to frame her husband by downloading child porn onto his old phone in an attempt get custody (long story short: don't do that it hasn't gone well for her), a 60 year old man dies of a heart attack while trying to dispose of the body of a woman he just killed in an act of instant universal karma or they were spies and the CIA got them (new theory Rum Runnas Razer the most complicated explanation must be correct), and a cybernetics company gave 350 people suffering from different levels of blindness new cybernetic eyes (yay!) but now they can support the eyes anymore and those people are going blind irrevocably blind! Also more math than has ever been on this show about the plausibility of the Matrix human battery idea!

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Featured Stories / Sources:

Woke Nursery Rhymes / Express:

https://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/1609168/nursery-rhymes-vegan-makeover-peta?fbclid=IwAR3V8gr6Cm1ycKW1gDVSDeWOwmtytHEjLKccgn6Rdse81u46hthwfllUmvY#l3605qz14diwis90nb

Elementary School Parties Hard / Fox News

https://www.fox2detroit.com/news/5th-grader-brings-weed-gummies-to-livonia-school-that-kindergartner-brought-margaritas?fbclid=IwAR2jhuN1gcEvcogZjEnytdhb-juQzyViBSUoCVifjijd9p40FKvbfQ5CZy4

Don't Frame Your Husband / PennLive:

https://www.pennlive.com/crime/2022/05/wife-filled-husbands-phone-with-child-porn-in-attempt-to-get-custody-of-children-oklahoma-police-say.html?outputType=amp&fbclid=IwAR3rvvDwALzYg918P2z5BrMUrqQViyy8P5SdmrWOWA-U0aeYTp8DS142yck

Instant Karma / Tri-City Herald:

https://www.tri-cityherald.com/news/nation-world/national/article261301452.html?fbclid=IwAR0OiHCWVapnL-NsmjUHogOS-vgRtjJivD95bjRHmGISAoxVezl3LNau4uU

Pure Evil / Futurism: 

https://futurism.com/neoscope/bionic-eye-implants-expire?utm_campaign=trueanthem_AI&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook&utm_term=futurism&fbclid=IwAR38o_6VtXiLwD-rikupO3fi4yoxuGAyAmO_Zeu0v7qH9TEosDICGsnZAuI

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On this week’s episode Jarred and Kyle discuss the weirdest and most interesting news articles from all over the internet, covering everything from: LV man takes a camel through the drive thru at in-n-out for fries probably for the camel, NJ mall is thrown into a panic after people think a popcorn machine is gunshots, Welsh cancer fund manager invests hundreds of thousands into a giant dragon statue, TX high school golf team is greeted by strippers on the course but then the coaches made them leave, and AU woman just learns how to walk and immediately is hit by a rollercoaster! Also what are your thoughts: are abandoned kids orphans or should they get their own title?

We Read The Click Bait So You Don't Have To!

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Featured Stories / Sources:

Camel Drive Thru / ABC:

https://abc7.com/las-vegas-camel-caught-on-video-in-n-out-burger/12297173/?fbclid=IwAR3rQgdGq0n1ATdb2_jzEfCbIAEorU0nbsOaNz0OSI7i3mAABrxmLeP5iyU

Popcorn Gun Shots / NJ.com:

https://www.nj.com/hudson/2022/10/social-media-runs-rampant-with-claims-of-active-shooter-at-jersey-city-mall-but-it-was-only-a-popcorn-machine.html?utm_source&fbclid=IwAR3y_kZ2XQAHL9R4eJxZdOTpZZIb0x_F9HzD-zRVU2TVjFjMIGtebC1tDXE

Terrible but are they making Dragons / BBC:

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-wales-63071584?at_medium=RSS&at_campaign=KARANGA&fbclid=IwAR2_XbRjnPS9cX6n_FQBEMPDjoGOZ5WLdJKNBgjnRVM5AlKC24xErxC0g8k

Strippers for the High School Golf Team / Fox News:

https://www.fox4news.com/news/adult-entertainment-club-event-austin-texas-golf-course-high-school-team-vista-ridge?fbclid=IwAR331idPaAfTdaOZX9zUCdDNa7YUuV8XQXfwXOmYPLJ5VGEvUbPSU1k0kqw

She Just Learned To WALK / AL.com:

https://www.al.com/life/2022/09/woman-who-just-learned-to-walk-after-car-crash-hit-by-rollercoaster-after-being-on-track-video-shows.html?utm_source&fbclid=IwAR1qdZYIOsgDfezHu4qUI6KLOUBqQT_qQPvid_pE4fHI-Bv_EtqXQJWuiqQ

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On this week’s episode Jarred and Kyle discuss the weirdest and most interesting news articles from all over the internet, covering probably one of the most perplexing sets of stories they've ever read everything from: A LA bound flight is the scene of a fight when one man said "no more will our ability to use the bathroom be determined by our financial standing in life" and one flight attendant said "you shall not pass" (they couldn't get along till they hopped off the plane at LAX), Vancouver City Council Candidate was a buyer because many people buy things and he's bought things in the past so it's ok to poop in your tenants house to establish dominance, villagers in India take 30 people hostage to either fix or build a road in front of a gas station that may or may not have been on a road, Accidental real news from Detroit where a man that should have been definitely charged with something previously but wasn't killed and ate a man (who unfortunately was named) Kevin Bacon, and finally a Woman got real sick cause her Dog diarrhea'd in he mouth.

We Read The Click Bait So You Don't Have To!

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Featured Stories / Sources:

1st Class Toilet Fight / The Liberty Line:

https://thelibertyline.com/2022/09/22/passenger-punches-flight-attendant/?fbclid=IwAR2Lwev2E9yYWFoaHy2-UIu6rXfkxda-G1qkvXRtvAEl8ghBhOe-Wxc8oFQ

ESTABLISH DOMINANCE / Vancouver is Awesome:

https://www.vancouverisawesome.com/bc-news/take-a-poop-to-assert-ownership-during-eviction-says-vancouver-city-council-candidate-5833670?fbclid=IwAR0gAMO8H3Myk4RaQL0bxVuZF0uMGBGyLjNc5FGyNRWjUc2xmWDAN9CbQpA

The Road Patch Incident / India Times:

https://www.indiatimes.com/trending/wtf/gurugram-villagers-force-authorities-construct-road-at-gunpoint-580468.html?fbclid=IwAR1-CtE5L2I0j3ASrGnqJJTzuW0h50UJXudrVQHYTnb2sCggh3-ToXLrazU

The Eating of Kevin Bacon / Fox News 2:

https://www.fox2detroit.com/news/michigan-cannibal-mark-latunski-pleads-guilty-to-murder-of-kevin-bacon?fbclid=IwAR1D36GUJHR9soQJ0eylvHQpofRj1Q_1VhoXLDUep7TPImDQ5KgF6aMPWfw#l8kb388apzydyioxwr

Dog Poop Doesn't Digest Well / Indy 100:

https://www.indy100.com/viral/woman-hospital-dog-poo-face?fbclid=IwAR1TuoIg9A_i0K1fMqOo8-R0ihULCYOB42AJtQ2ZzxZJCYlCQgCIN_lrkRw#l8kb25xdwydwibi05fj

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On this week’s episode Jarred and Kyle discuss the weirdest and most interesting news articles from all over the internet, covering everything from: a 66 year old woman sets a terrible world record for most batteries that needed to be removed from inside of her, COO of Beyond Meat ironically takes a bite out of a man after a fight in a parking lot (#EatPlantsNotPeople), CA woman fakes her kidnapping to get back with her ex (apparently it worked for awhile at least), Man in India gets an 8in deodorant can stuck up his butt (phallic things really need a stopper at the end), and Ghana man "cuts off his own" penis while dreaming about slaughtering a goat his wife was away when it happened but things aren't adding up.

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Featured Stories / Sources:

Not a good World Record/Huffington Post:

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/doctors-remove-46-batteries-from-woman_n_63260a7ae4b027aa4066ae8e

Eats Plants Not People / Fox News 24:

https://www.nwahomepage.com/news/beyond-meat-coo-arrested-for-biting-mans-nose-near-razorback-stadium/?fbclid=IwAR1AksaU9KsgdiX_zWMbQSv_18WIJDSSuwMcyrhzrxSGF52N-RpTWHAPSfc

I was Kidnapped Take Me Back / NPR:

https://www.npr.org/2022/09/20/1124104521/sherri-papini-kidnapping-hoax-sentence

Stop Putting Cylindrical Things In Your BUTT / New York Post:

https://nypost.com/2022/09/15/man-had-8-inch-deodorant-can-lodged-up-butt-for-3-weeks/?fbclid=IwAR2FQxmDmJyTER8kTEuWjJP5UFz8cl5Q-HuCbXGSEKbB24ikMoYHkKfRPzc

Obligatory Penis Story (from last week) / ABC News:

https://abcnews4.com/amp/news/nation-world/man-chops-off-his-own-penis-during-dream-about-slaughtering-goat-reports-say-ghana-kofi-atta-wofa-atta-assin-fosu-genitals-bleeding

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