Deathly Hallows chapter 24. With absolutely nothing going on in the real world, we immerse ourselves in a backlog of Wizarding World news. Last week we watched the midpoint film; this episode, we continue reading the novel, and learn all about Harry's sudden discovery of labor as a political concept and (second? third?) bout of religious mania. Two paths diverge in a wood, and our hero must choose which order to talk to two C-list characters who will dump pages upon pages of very important lore and worldbuilding, as well as highlight some of the more collar-tug worthy instances of Meaningful Storytelling. Would it surprise you to learn that the house elf and goblin stuff in this series is still insanely fucked up? Can the fandom remember that the elves are literally slaves? Please??

Finally, we catch up with our hero, Spartan 117...

Deathly Hallows Part 1 film. As is tradition, we spend longer than the runtime of the actual film walking through and breaking down the first of the two movies based on The Deathly Hallows! Where does it rank compared to the other adaptations? What does it do with the awful source material? Did it really need to be split into two films, and do we believe the producer's claims that it wasn't a money-motivated decision? (no)

We also take a little adventure at the end of the episode that you won't want to miss!

Deathly Hallows chapter 23. We receive an update from an anonymous benefactor regarding the Harry Potter pin collecting scene before we check in on an unfortunate Yahoo op ed about whether or not it's okay to play the video g- sorry, whether it's okay to wear a halloween costume. Then we chat about the continuing Fantastic Beasts production drama before diving into a true Clusterfuck Chapter tour de force. That's right, we have the grandaddy of all Hagrid's Hut style chapters here that transcends space, time, and distance, and drops a bunch of new random lore to justify its ticking clock structure. And, of course... we say goodbye to that funny little guy we all love.

Deathly Hallows chapter 22. We investigate the Wizarding World brand's Halloween plans for this year and end up stumbling into some incredible Christmas lore instead before discussing a chapter that finally honors the REAL heroes: podcasters. We also chat about the ever-unraveling state of the story's theology, worldbuilding and politics before taking an accidental deep dive into the world of official Harry Potter pin collecting... in 3D!

Deathly Hallows chapter 21. After checking in with Buzzfeed to see how they're handling Harry Potter clickbait these days, we finally learn all about the Tale of the Three Brothers: a wizarding world story so common, why, everyone knows of it! We also learn about a bunch of aphorisms and other cultural artifacts that surely anyone would recognize, because they've been part of the wizarding world this whole time and definitely not pulled entirely out of the author's ass just now. Finally, we head over to reddit and quora for a grab bag of third segment goodies.

Deathly Hallows chapter 20. We catch up with Eddie Redmayne and the WB Game Studios statements on Rowling before making our way through an absolutely dire chapter where all of our heroes are unrecognizable, even by the shifting standards of book 7. Arguing about what 'rook' means, having youth pastor chats, and holding extremely strong opinions about the role of the press for teenagers--that sounds like the golden trio alright! (?) Then we head on over to the subreddit to learn about more Game Ideas.

Deathly Hallows chapter 19. We chat about JKR's t-shirt and the dogshit TERF-etsy she is boosting, contemplate the impending (perhaps already complete?) merger between radfems and the far right, and wonder if WB will ever actually do anything (they won't, but it's fun to think about). Then we go long on a chapter that feels like a story reaching its climax, but with all of the buildup completely missing--with multiple sexy holograms and a reveal of the Deluminator's function so baffling we once again have to extend our sympathies to the people who thought this book was fake when it leaked once upon a time. Finally, we try to roast a Harry Potter website "for serious readers" but ended up crashing it, so we check in with the Hogwarts Legacy subreddit instead to see how well they're managing their expectations for a licensed video game.

content warning: lots of unpleasantness discussing JKR's shirt and the heinous TERF store she is promoting--to skip straight to the book stuff, head to 50:45.

Deathly Hallows chapter 18. We discuss *inhales* the Vancouver billboard funded by hateful people riding a hateful billionaire's coattails, the initial Troubled Blood review that got things kicking off this week, the continued Troubled Blood reviews from The Guardian that revealed how it's actually WORSE than the initial review made it sound, the pile of pre-existing Known Stuff about the Strike series, the misogyny and transmisogyny common in crime fiction generally, the Fantastic Beasts filming news, and... the announcement of Harry Potter Skyrim. On top of all that, we have a completely out of pocket chapter that pushes the already-strained boundaries of our previously well-defined cast of characters to ludicrous levels in an attempt to tell a very (even for this book) ham-handed story about Harry's crisis of faith. Crisis of 'Braith, get it? Never mind.

It goes without saying but just in case: content warning for All Of JK Rowling's Business, as well as the related shit of classic fiction like Psycho and Silence of the Lambs and so on. If you want to skip the news segment, the chapter stuff starts at 1:14:15!

Surprise! Here's our mega-length news segment for this week, hot and fresh. Didn't seem fair to make people pay up to hear it early. We discuss *inhales* the Vancouver billboard, the initial Troubled Blood review that got things kicking off this week, the continued Troubled Blood reviews from The Guardian (very helpful, thanks!), the apparent pile of pre-existing Known Stuff about the Strike series, the misogyny and transmisogyny common in crime fiction generally, the Fantastic Beasts filming news, and... the announcement of Harry Potter Skyrim (which is actually continued in our third segment this week, so if you want to hear us talk more about it or think we missed an important topic, hold tight--it's probably in the full episode to be released later)

It goes without saying but just in case: content warning for All Of JK Rowling's Business, as well as the related shit of classic fiction like Psycho and Silence of the Lambs and so on.

Deathly Hallows chapter 17. Oh my god, an actually good chapter? It sounds too good to be true, but we had a blast reading this oddly self-contained story that starts as a spooky horror movie and ends with an outrageous and strangely endearing Voldemort sequence. We also learn all about The Butterbeer Bosses, engage with a listicle trying its best to navigate Harry Potter clickbait in a post-mask-off-JKR world, and more! Finally, we visit the Slytherin common room, which proves to be far more blessed than we could have imagined.

(mild content warning for the first segment: if a listicle bumbling through elements of the series' transphobia/racism/etc doesn't sound fun to you right now, start at 14:00!)