Smiling Sundays - #302 The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

I Do My Homework

How do you go about the tests in your life? Do you just show up to your life unprepared, do you hope that things will work out without getting ready, do you not participate and put your head on your desk in your life class tuning it all out…not taking notes or doing what’s required in preparation of being your best in the moment. We live in a society where it’s said that if you got an “A” then you knew the subject. We put more merit over a grade rather than mastery of a subject matter.

And when I took classes in college, I knew how to fake my way through them, I knew how to study the last moment to get the right answers…and then forget them right after the test. We go about our lives thinking that we should get what we want because we showed…even though we didn’t do the work. That we as human beings deserve things just because. We have become a society that has become entitled, thinking that being here… means that we should be given whatever we ask for.

I recently got a message on my Instagram account for someone to be a guest speaker on my podcast. Here’s how the message went.

Him: Would love to be a guest spot on your podcast my man. Private message me.

I replied… Have you listened to my podcast?

Him: I believe I’ve heard it. And checking out your feed it seems as if we’d be a good match for a killer episode. I would love to come on and talk about the grind and a small interview if you are interested sir.

I will talk about my last response next, but I want to preface this first. I am not downing this gentleman for reaching out to me. I’m glad he had the courage to do so. I think it’s great that he’s reaching out to put himself in the hot seat and share his knowledge…

But where I was turned off is I asked him if he had ever listened to my podcast and he said he “believed” he did. The reason I asked him that question is because my podcast isn’t an interview podcast. I have not had one guest on… EVER…as this is a short 5-7 minute podcast of affirmations and my after thoughts on the meaning of the affirmation.

He didn’t do his homework. I know he just searched in the key words for the word “podcast” or some other similar hashtag and sent everyone a scripted message. He didn’t do his homework. He had nothing to share with me why he would be good for my podcast, why he would be a good fit, he didn’t even take the time to listen to one, and when I asked him the question if he listened to it because I wanted to give him a chance to come up with a good response…he didn’t even try to listen to it…he just said he believed he did…which that lie turned me off right away.

So I nicely said to him, you might want to do your homework before you go pitching yourself. You might want to learn a little more about the podcast and the person before you go sending out as many spam messages as possible. Yes it will take more time and work, but it will reap more benefits for you.

And I am not chastising him for his effort, I hope he learns from his attempts, and maybe I might be the first lesson for him. We want to get to the top as quickly as possible, but we don’t want to put in the research, we don’t want to put in the time, we don’t want to put in the effort to bring something great to what we have. We want it to be given to us and we think if we just ask for something it will be handed to us on a golden platter.

Now don’t get me wrong here in thinking I am saying don’t jump without thinking first. Sometimes we need to make these mistakes so we learn from them, sometimes we need to get burned so we pay attention to the signs. It’s like the book I’m writing right now. My accountability partner that I skype with weekly talk about this lesson every time. He is writing a book as well, and we talk about how we want our book to be perfect how it will be the one thing that will launch us, and if we do it wrong it’ll be over.

But it’s ludicrous to think that way. We both have had the courage to send each other our rough drafts to read over and critique honestly. We had to let go of our pride and to send our work to other people to have it be analyzed not to be torn apart, but for us to let go of the notion of perfection and hold onto the realization of bringing our ideas into the world. For I believe both him and I have something great to share with the world, but the more we hold onto something without getting it out there…mistakes and all…then we will never learn from it…and others will never hear the great message we have to share with the world.

So do your homework, put in the time, put in the effort to put your best exertions out there…and be willing to jump before the time is just perfect.

I am never saying don’t do your best, but get to the point where you have put in good effort and then get it out there to be analyzed and criticized. Get it out there to be molded into something better. Be willing to fail repeatedly until you have crafted the work that you meant to…not a work of perfection…but a work of helping people see something different. Have your life be an example, have your works be a placeholder for others to be challenged, and have your homework be done with the notion that it’s not about getting an “A” but it’s about becoming the best version of yourself that you can be.

You have a great purpose, you have great ideas to share, and you are meant to be challenged and challenge others by the preparation you put into your life. So do your homework, do your research, and put your works into the world ready and willing to be criticized. Not because you need to be torn down…but to know that what you said mattered. There will always be someone who will try to tear your work apart, and that’s ok because they’ll make it better, they’ll make you stronger, they’ll make your skin thicker…and know when they’re doing it—that there are some who will mean well, and there will be some who will try to tear it down because you’ve hit a nerve or a belief system they may not want to address. And that’s ok, because it’s not your mission to change everyone with your life and your works. It’s your mission to reach the people who are ready…to help hold the hands and support the ones who are willing to do something different. I know I get so caught up in trying to reach as many people as I can that I forget that my mission isn’t to reach a billion people…my mission is to reach as many people as I can…one person at a time.

So let us stand out not just try to fit in and half ass our way towards things…let us do our homework and put in the hard work to be prepared for the life we want to live.

Today’s Personal Commitment:
Where are you falling short in doing your homework? Are you just showing up to work doing the bare minimum? Are you giving just enough minimal effort knowing it will keep you off your bosses’ radar? Are you showing up in your relationships just being there instead of being proactive in them?  

What can you do that can not only makes your life works better but makes you better as a person. So, look at your life and ask yourself where are you falling short. And then ask yourself, how you can do the homework necessary to begin changing the places of why you aren’t reaching the potential that you truly desire for your life.

I Do My Homework

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by:
- Zest by basematic (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
- I Have Often Told You Stories (guitar instrumental) by Ivan Chew (c) copyright 2013 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

Synergy Saturdays-#301 The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

I Make Every Moment Come Alive

I’m Alive in The Moment…I don’t take what I have for granted, I don’t take the people in my life for granted, and I don’t take my time for granted. While I’m always looking to better every situation, I am alive in the moment and thankful for what I have…because I know that to get to where I want, I have to be in appreciation of what I have. So many people look for something better while never really enjoying what they do have, and when you live like this…no matter what you get…it will never be enough…and they will be on an endless journey of un-satisfaction.

I was in a coffee shop doing some work, and as I sat at the counter I was facing a set of couches. I looked up from my computer and I saw two young gals sitting with each other. One had her arm around the other girl and pulled her closer to her, as they had such wonderful smiles on their face, as they took a selfie together. Seeing that love they had for each other made me smile, and it made me pause for a moment and ask…am I loving and living in my moments like these girls were?

We think we need someone to brighten our moments…and they can…but if we don’t know how to brighten our moments alone then we can’t really be totally in the moment with anyone else. We look for something else to fulfill us, to give us what we need or want…and things can accentuate our situations…but they are not what changes our moments. Our attitude of gratitude will. And the happiest people I’ve ever known weren’t satisfied by what they had, they were fulfilled by life.

I was listening to a podcast about a child who sold maps to tourists in Afghanistan on a road called Chicken St. I don’t think I’ll ever forget a road like that…but the person asked the child why he did what he did. He told his story about his father being older and sick so he had to take care of his family. His father passed away and so he was the sole provider now. And during their conversation they were talking about a movie where a child couldn’t be what he wanted to be…and the interviewer ask the young map seller if his life was like that actor in the movie…and the child said, no his life was better because in the movie the kid was trapped where he was…he couldn’t follow his dreams.

And it really hit me hard, this young kid who was selling maps said he loved his life and was blessed. He told the interviewer that his dream was to be a pilot, and he said he would make it happen. I always am amazed when I hear about people in other countries who have the worst situations that we can’t even imagine, and they are smiling all the time, they are living their life making the most of it, and still dreaming of what they want. All the while we have the easiest of lives, and when we have some tiny adversity…we give up.

Being on social media, it’s endless how much complaining I see…how school is taking too long and they aren’t done yet, how they had to wait an extra few minutes to get their coffee or food and it was the end of the world, or how any change in the temperature is a major inconvenience for them. Yes, I get people want to express how they feel, but when does it become a habit of always complaining about the small things?  How can we enjoy every precious moment? How can we not want our time to come before we are ready? There’s a quote I like that reminds me of this… “I found I didn’t get the experience until after I needed it.” Are you willing to go through the harder times to get the experience needed, or are you going to wish for it to be easy and not grow from each moment?

So how will you live in the moment, how will you come alive in the moment, how will you love what you have so you can accept and attract what is to come your way…how will you be fulfilled? You deserve a great life…but that will only happen if you choose to allow it to happen. It will only happen if you make every moment come alive.

Today’s Personal Commitment:
How do you make your moments come to life? I’m sure you may be going to work or doing some sort of repetition that you did yesterday. Instead of looking it as hum drum and boring…what if you were to ask yourself, how can I make this moment come alive? How can I find the beauty in the moment and truly appreciate it? And how can I make it last throughout the day? Find more awareness during your day to keep asking this question to change your day. I know when I worked in a pretty mundane job I found ways to make my work fun, to see how fast I could do it and time myself, to find the stories behind the people I was doing the work for, and just to connect with as many people as I could in my work. It not only made me more aware of how great the moment was, but it also made me more creative during my work to become better at it. So what can you do to make your moments come alive, and how can you keep asking that question all day?

I Make Every Moment Come Alive

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by:
- Zest by basematic (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
- I Have Often Told You Stories (guitar instrumental) by Ivan Chew (c) copyright 2013 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

Fantastic Fridays-#300 The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

I’m Willing To Be Alone Than Be With The Wrong People

We are so afraid of being alone. We are petrified to be alone with ourselves as we always have to have the TV running in the background, some music distracting us on our drive, or having to always be out at some happening event because we are bored. These are not bad things of themselves, they can be wonderful things, but I find that they can separate us from ourselves. We always have to have some noise, or something distracting us from the conversations in our heads.

I spent years chasing after the wrong people. Hoping that they could give me the love I needed when we were together, and even though they couldn’t give me what I needed I still tried to make it work…and when they left I begged for them to come back. I told myself that if people left then it was something to do with me. That I was the reason for their leaving, and at times I was… as I didn’t believe I deserved love, so I found ways to sabotage relationships consciously and subconsciously… and I found ways to begin to believe that for my worth to be proven I had to have everyone love me.

There are people that you just aren’t meant to be with. And it says nothing bad about them and it says nothing bad about you…you both just have different roads to take. And when we can see our worth, and we can see the other person’s worth as well…to be able to see the differences that don’t work…then we can make the hard choices to be alone rather than trying to make something work that’s broken. We have the hopes that people will change, we have the hopes that we will change because of them… and that can happen, but if we can’t truly assess a person and their issues and our issues together then we will keep trying to make things work that aren’t meant to.

We will keep trying to build relationships on fear. We will look for people who fit a certain type…they are good looking, they might be nice at certain times, they are fun…or whatever thing you look arbitrarily for in a relationship in the beginning…but the thing is not everyone will be worthy of our time. That’s not a slight and saying we are better than anyone, it’s just saying we have limited time, and we are the CEOs of our life. Are we going to settle for subpar people in our personal organization…or are we going to build a better network of people who resonate with us.

I want to build a place with people who create better feelings inside of me, people who challenge me, people expect more of me, people who support me and build me up, and people who live beautiful lives. I’m not looking for people who create more anxiety in my life. And yes, NO ONE creates anxiety in us...but people can bring an atmosphere with them…and we don’t have to be part of their chaos.

I would rather be alone than be with people who bring me down, I would rather be alone then be with people who create more chaos for me, and I would rather be alone while I work on myself to become better for the people I’m meant to be with….and while that may be harder…it’s my hope that you will be willing to put in the work in yourself to not only become the person you’re meant to be…but that you attract the right type of people for your life as well.

You are worthy of great relationships…so begin acting like you deserve it…and know that being alone isn’t something scary. It’s a time to reflect, it’s a time to grow, and it’s a chance to change your life if need be…you only have so much time. Are you willing to take the time to understand what you need…instead of rushing blindly somewhere because of the fear of being alone? We attract what we think we are worth, but we also accept what we think we deserve.

Today’s Personal Commitment:
Take some time to be quiet and to be alone with yourself. Whether that be meditation, whether it be shutting the radio off in the car on your drive to work, or whether it be going for a walk alone to just enjoy your company. You are going to have to live with yourself for the rest of your life, so you should probably learn how to love yourself more, and how to be your best friend. If you can’t be happy with yourself, how can you ever be happy with anyone else? So find more ways to take time for yourself to hear the voices in your head and have conversations to work them out…or to get out and be active with yourself to shut off those voices at times. I find there are times where we need to analyze things, and there are times where we need to get out of our heads…find time to do both this week purposefully.

I’m Willing To Be Alone Than Be With The Wrong People

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by:
- Zest by basematic (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
- I Have Often Told You Stories (guitar instrumental) by Ivan Chew (c) copyright 2013 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

Thoughtful Thursdays-#299 The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

I Love The Person In The Mirror

What do you see when you look in the mirror? What’s the first thing you think of or say when you see yourself? Are you kind to yourself…or do you find a way to see and comment on all your so called flaws?

Do you have eyes that look at yourself as someone who admires who you are, do you have eyes that see the beauty within yourself, do you have eyes that convert your flaws into seeing them as beautiful? Yes, I know there’s always more we can be. We could be a little thinner, we could have less acne or circles under our eyes, we could be taller, we could be shorter, we could be smarter, we could be prettier, we could have more hair, or less hair, we could be something more that we wish for…but when we look to see our flaws as problems, when we can’t love ourselves in the situation we’re currently in…then we cannot become the people we’re meant to be.

Being in the personal training industry people seem to only focus on two merits towards change…and those things are food intake and your workout output. And yes they can be good factors in change…but they are only part of the equation. The first part of change begins with a shift of emotion…it’s putting out what I like to call intention….an intention to love ourselves as we are first.

It’s not that you are accepting your physical self as it is forever, but when we focus on what we don’t like or what we hate about ourselves we create resistance. We create emotions that create anger, upset, or despair…and thus we create a different chemical composition within our bodies. We create stress and thus it creates more cortisol which has been linked to fat increase within our bodies.

I get it, changing usually started with the awareness of being somewhere we don’t want to be. And so we should be awake and mindful, that the place we‘ve come to in life isn’t our best self. And I think we don’t change, because that’s the place we stay. We understand we aren’t living our best life and we judge our actions as not being up to par with being our best self…and then judge ourselves on a whole as despicable people…not just our actions…but us as humans as being unworthy of who we reallyw ant to be. And so we continue the vicious cycle that got us here in the first place, we think that if we become our own bullies and beat ourselves up… that we will get upset enough and begin that change.

And some people do change, but usually that change is temporary. Even if that change is for 5 years, I see people coming back to where they were because it was never truly about loving themselves, it was about changing themselves because they felt they were never enough. You are enough, even in your faults. Your faults are not who you are…they are not the parts about you that you have deemed wretched. The more we look in the mirror and see our physical faults, the more we look at the things we hate about our personality traits or things that make us different with distress… then the more we keep ourselves stuck…and unable to move.

Transition starts with the intention of self-love. It starts with seeing the beauty within first.

Think about someone you’ve encouraged…did you tear them apart and tell them they are a piece of crap? Has that ever worked before, by making someone feel so bad about who they are…so they could change??? Probably not, and I bet you wouldn’t do it even if it had the chance of working…and the reason being is because deep down you know there’s a better way. It’s a way of encouraging, loving, and supporting people. So what if you were to look in the mirror each morning with eyes of kindness, with eyes of support, and seeing the beauty within you as you would for someone you really want to encourage?

Don’t accept mediocrity…but don’t crucify yourself for not being enough. The only way to become the best person you can be is to love yourself first. Love changes everything, and when you start with a great intention of love towards yourself… you will see the beautiful person who has always been right before you…in front of the mirror every day. You will have taken off your blinders…and you’ll begin seeing the changes you wish to happen naturally because you focused on what was good in you rather than always seeing what was wrong with you.

Today’s Personal Commitment:
This week look in the mirror and say out loud 5 amazing or beautiful things about yourself. They can be physical things and they can traits. Try to have a bit of both in your mirror confessions because I want you to see the full beauty of who you are. What if you were to start your day off with a little more self-love? And at night write down how your day was different by starting your morning off this way instead of finding fault and just rushing from one morning ritual to the next.

I Love The Person In The Mirror

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by:
- Zest by basematic (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
- I Have Often Told You Stories (guitar instrumental) by Ivan Chew (c) copyright 2013 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

Wisdom Wednesdays-#298 The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

What I Reach For, I Make Mine

To have what you want, means having to do what others will not. There are many pathways we can take, we can take the one of conformity…the one of ease and giving up our dreams for a life of comfort…a life of acceptance by others instead of going against the grain, instead of not having everyone like you, and maybe even being alone. 

We can take the path of resistance and fight tooth and nail for everything that we want. We can forge our way ahead and work to try and become something more. Maybe even something we may not have been destined for…but we dreamed and wanted to it make ours no matter what.

Or we can take the middle road, that path that straddles both these ideas. As sometimes being successful, means failing.

For life is not about fighting everything that comes our way, and it’s not about taking everything without hesitation or thought on what’s best. The middle road isn’t the easiest road…in fact it may be the hardest road because it’s about giving up on dreams sometimes because they may not be right for us, and other times it’s about chasing after ideas that scare us. It’s a balancing act on listening to your intuition and knowing when the right time to chase and the right time to give up is. The middle road is the hardest road because it isn’t settling for the hard way or the easy way…it’s finding the balance in both.

Abraham Lincoln said, “Things come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.” And so we go about our lives waiting for things to be handed to us, the left overs, instead of being in a controlled hustle to make every moment ours. Instead of taking the middle road and deciding what pursuits are worthy of our time. We can reach for anything and make it ours, but it’s about a higher calling than lusting over what we want…it’s a calling to ask what is truly worthy of our time. For everything is possible in life. But what is truly worthy of your time, what is truly worthy of pursuing, and are you willing to hustle like you never have before?

The greatest rewards took time, but they also were measured by how willing I was to hustle, how willing I was to give my life to the cause, how willing I was to fail and get back up…to reach further than I had before into the depths of darkness waiting to be consumed by the demons and fears I had known not yet. And while I still was afraid…the things worthy of my time…were worth pursuing still.

So while traveling that middle road will be the scariest, hardest, and most uncertain path you’ll ever take…it will be the most worthwhile…it will be the most rewarding, and it will be the most uplifting …because reaching for more in life is what the human condition is about. We are not meant to lay idle to the wastes of life, we are meant to grow, we are meant to build, we are meant to clean up our messes and learn from them, and we are meant to struggle, die, and find out our purposes along the way. I don’t know your beliefs in life, and it doesn’t matter for we will all come to an end and will be able to pull the curtain back and understand our journey…but I hope that you do understand it is a circle of life…that there is no end…there is only the path that we take, there is only the lessons that we learn along the way, and there is only the choice of our lives to grow while we move…or to be afraid and remain idle. Each path will end the same…but only one path will be the most fulfilling while you travel it. Choose wisely. I hope you choose the middle road. I hope you hustle in your life, and I hope while you hustle that you have the patience to continue the path for the rewards revealed upon your journey. I hope that your reach will always be further than your grasp.

Today’s Personal Commitment:
What path are you traveling? Take a look at your life and ask if you’re traveling the easy road, the hard road, or the middle road?

Which road sounds like the best road for you?

We all have a different purpose, and I can’t tell you yours…only you can do that. But you have to be willing to ask what it is that you need, and what it is that you want…and what it is that you’re willing to do to make it a reality. I hear so many people talking about how they won’t settle…but yet they aren’t willing to do the personal work on themselves first. They expect their partners to be the answer, they expect the activity to bring their fulfillment, and they expect life to come to them… yet a beautiful life is not one that is waited for in the expectation it will be given to them…a beautiful life is one that is hustled for, it is one that is earned by being willing to become the people we want to be first… before we expect anything else to come unsettle our lives.

What I Reach For, I Make Mine

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by:
- Zest by basematic (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
- I Have Often Told You Stories (guitar instrumental) by Ivan Chew (c) copyright 2013 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

Tag Me Tuesdays-#297 The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

I Find Happiness in What I Already Have

I remember a Christmas when I was somewhere around 5 or 6 years of age. I’ve never wanted anything in my life. I’ve had parents who loved and supported me in whatever I wanted to do. We were a middleclass family so I never worried about if there would be food on the table, I lived in a safe neighborhood (although I passed a few sections of town where gang members hung out when walking to school each morning), and I really had everything and more I could ever need and want.

I don’t have children, but one thing I have seen with parents…is wanting their children to not want or struggle like they did when growing up. And the same was true with my parents. So on Christmas, after we went to morning mass, I remember waiting in anticipation to be able to open up the plethora of presents before me. Heaven had come early and I couldn’t wait to tear open the wrapping paper as if I was a wild animal devouring my prey.

For our Christmas rituals, my brother and I would open our presents first and we would switch back and forth on who opened the next present. Our parents knew we didn’t care about anyone else’s presents, so they just let us get ours out of the way so they could enjoy their Christmas in peace without our whining.

On this Christmas morning I decided a new tactic.  I was going to pick the bigger present and open it first. Rays of light emitted from this present as it was a gift from the gods for a 5 year old. It was a big plastic case, that had a handle like a briefcase so you could carry it around. It was a light khaki brown color and when you opened it…angel trumpets played as it unveiled a miniature city that you could ride your Hot Wheel cars around in. It had a police station, a multiple level car parking lot with an awesome ramp, and many other businesses in the city… I was in love.

I got my Hot Wheel cars out so I could play with it immediately as the other presents no longer mattered to me. I was in heaven.  Hot Wheels was my favorite toy to play with, as my brother and I used to race each other, play demolition derby, and many other cool car activities.  I felt burdened because I had to watch my brother open his lame presents…and then pause from my new city to open socks, underwear, or any other uncool present for a 5 year old. It was truly a miracle I didn’t go mad from having to wait to get back to my city

I finished opening my presents and my brother had one last present to open. My brother was different than me. He was the sibling that seemed to have all the luck. He was more talented than me growing up, he was smarter than me, and he seemed to be better at everything else than I was. And his method of opening presents was to open the bigger ones last as he wanted to save the best for last, where I was the kid who wanted dessert first before dinner. I didn’t want to prolong the good stuff.

And so he opened the last big present and he had a similar case like mine…but it was a dark dirt brown color… and it caught my attention immediately. I stopped playing so I could check out what he had. And when opened his case, it was a construction site town… it looked so beautiful. He had more hills on his, and how bumpy and fun they would be to have a Hot Wheel car one…where mine were all smooth and boring. Dang!!! His so much cooler than mine...that dark brown was so enticing. And even though I didn’t know what the word meant at the time…I lusted for that toy as I wished that it was mine.

I screamed out loud almost immediately at how upset I was. How he got the cooler Hot Wheel town than me. I was such a little brat. I don’t know how my parents didn’t murder me after my 10th birthday. They must have been saints. I put up such a huge fit as I cried so loudly. And not a pretty cry, it was one of those snot bubble cries. The one where the kid has a fit on the floor pounding his feet and hands on the ground like he’s having a seizure.

I’m sure I calmed down after about 10 minutes, but everything went dark for me as I only say red from the anger and lust for the other toy my brother now had. I don’t remember much else during my fit except acting like a wild banshee. 

The funny thing is my parents knew us both. They knew how my brother loved construction stuff and I didn’t. My brother was one of those kids who would be left outside to wait for the bus...and as he sat on the curb, he had a radar for finding mud puddles to jump and play in. And so his clothes would be filthy, and my mom would have to change him quickly again, before the bus came for school.

He loved dump trucks and back hoes. He even had a bunch of Hot Wheel Construction vehicles. They knew that’s what he really liked… I didn’t like construction. I wasn’t a kid who played in the dirt, I wasn’t a kid who liked insect or other dirty things… and so they knew exactly what type of Hot Wheels town we both wanted…but I saw how cool his looked and I thought his might be better than mine and so I lost it…like the little brat I was.

I got exactly what I wanted, I got exactly what my parents knew I’d love…but I let my lust for someone maybe having something better than me…and I became sad because of that. I was ecstatic when I opened my present, and then by comparison I became extremely upset seeing someone had something different…and that I equated that they might have something better. And I think we still do this as adults. We lust for what other people have, we see their grass and think it’s nicer over there. And there’s a quote I love that says the grass isn’t greener on the other side…both have the same potential…it’s just that on the other side the person cultivated it. They took care of it. And if we took care of our grass on our side, it would be just as beautiful.

So how can you cultivate your yard better…and what I mean by yard, is how can you take better care of yourself. How can you stop lusting for what others have, how can you love what you have, how can you find the beauty on your side, how can you work on yourself and your compulsions to see the wonderful things you have, and how can you enjoy the moment? How can you live fully in the moment never upset by what anyone else gets or has? How can you know that you have something beautiful…and can create a better situation by cultivating your yard.? The grass isn’t greener over there…the potential is equally the same on both sides…how will you cultivate yourself, how will you become better inside first to make your grass greener on your side?

Today’s Personal Commitment:
What are the things in your yard that are killing your grass? What in your life have you allowed to keep you from your peace, from sharing your kindness with the world, and from having happiness and joy for your place in life? We all have some sort of poison in our lives that’s killing our yard. Whether it be the unhealthy distractions we gravitate towards when we’re upset, whether it be sabotaging things in our lives that we don’t think we deserve, or whether we focus on negative thoughts that keep us down and keep us from moving forward in our lives.  I think we’ve forgotten what’s important in life, and have focused more on the poisons in our lives. So take a pen and paper out and at the top write Poisons In My Life, and list all the poisons or things that are killing your grass.

The first part to changing your life is by becoming aware. And once you write them down, next ask yourself what fertilizers in your life are you using right now, and which ones could you use instead of the poisons that are keeping you from having the green yard you desire? Write down a plan on how you can use your 3 greatest fertilizers every day. Change starts out small, and change starts out with consistency. Let’s cultivate our yard, so we have the green grass we want, instead of coveting what our neighbor has. Because if we get our neighbors yard, but didn’t learn how to cultivate green grass…it soon will be just like our old yard.

I Find Happiness in What I Already Have

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by:
- Zest by basematic (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
- I Have Often Told You Stories (guitar instrumental) by Ivan Chew (c) copyright 2013 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

Mindful Mondays-#296 The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

I See Your Soul Before I See Your Face

How do you see people? What do you first see when you see someone?

We are physical beings and we usually are attracted to the things that are pleasing to our eyes. I’m not talking about just a romantic attraction…but we seem to gravitate towards people and things that we find pretty physically.

What if you were to see someone’s soul before you saw their face, their body, or wherever your eyes first gravitate to? We miss the beauty of people by seeing the physical first and then making a judgement on that.  Maybe this might sound crazy to some, but I’ve always wished I could see people’s auras. That’s if we really do have them. I bought a book a while ago on being able to do this…now, whether it’s a bunch of crap I don’t know I guess I have to read it and work on practicing it. But I think it would be cool to see people’s energies first. They say everything is built of atoms, energies vibrating at different frequencies…so if we could see deeper why, wouldn’t we be able to see more in a person? Why wouldn’t we be able to see the depths of a soul and get to know the true essence and beauty of a person?

I was having a discussion with a friend about lust and respecting people…and he brought an awesome idea to my attention. He said what if we were to see people’s souls instead of the lust in the physical. And while I’m not a perfect person, I hope that I can see the souls in the people before me, I hope I can learn to not judge and to see the deepest parts of people, and I hope I can be open to giving people the chances to show themselves to me…rather than seeing what I don’t like right away.

I wonder if we saw deeper in people that they might live up to their potential…I wonder if we saw people’s soul we might become better individuals ourselves. But even if we can’t see aura’s or any other spiritual essence in a person…I believe we can look deeper than a person’s physical appearance. I believe we can take our time to truly know who a person is… beyond what our eyes tell us…and maybe that comes from practicing being a part of more than just one realm. It’s about being in the physical, the mental, the spiritual, the emotional, and the environmental. We sometimes are so one dimensional that we miss out on all the beauties of life

So I challenge you today, to see the souls in people. To not just trust your eyes first, but to use a deeper intuition...to use a different set of eyes in truly seeing people today. Maybe the world would be a better place if we looked deeper at people first…I like to think so…and I’m willing to take the rest of my life in building up that ability to find out. I hope you are too.

Today’s Personal Commitment:
Today, instead of seeing people with your eyes…try to see them on a deeper level. See if you can pause your judgement for a moment and hear their soul. Not just hear what someone says, but to hear the deeper parts of that person, so you can feel their energy, and experience that person on a different level. It’s easy to let our eyes do all the work, but what if you were to open your intuition today purposefully, to work on bettering it, and to use all your senses in getting to know people on a deeper level. Step out of ONLY living in the physical and connect with the other 4 realms of emotional, spiritual, mental, and environmental…and see what’s different about your day and the people you interact with.

I See Your Soul Before I See Your Face

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by:
- Zest by basematic (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
- I Have Often Told You Stories (guitar instrumental) by Ivan Chew (c) copyright 2013 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

Smiling Sundays - #295 The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

I Make NO Apologies For Being Myself

There’s a quote that’s attributed to Oscar Wilde but it’s thought this exact quote comes from somewhere else unknown at the moment…and the quote says, “Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.” I think it’s easy to apologize for who we are. We think we aren’t perfect, we think we have faults, and we think people can see all of that inside of us…and so we want to apologize to others for not being enough. But that’s the lie we tell ourselves, that we have to be perfect to be worthy, that we have to have it altogether at all times to be accepted or known as something great.

We put people on pedestals…raising them up high…and then when they fall we judge them for not being the perfect people we expected them to be. We’re upset by what we made them out to be. Look at Tiger Woods and his infidelity issue that was on public display and how people judged him for his private family matter, or how vice president Dan Quayle misspelled potato. He was crucified for making a mistake…which to tell you the truth I would have misspelled it too. In fact when it happened I was like…you mean there’s no “E” at the end?

I was looking at the back story for Dan’s misspelling mistake for this podcast, and they said he was part of an elementary school spelling bee. He had a que card that was given to him for the correct spelling of the word…and Dan’s card actually had the word spelled incorrectly as well… it had an “E” at the end of it… so someone else had made that mistake as well, but Dan was the one who corrected the student from the card.

For me, it just seemed so crazy at how people wanted to crucify him for making a simple mistake. We do this with presidents and politicians, especially the ones who don’t line up with our political leanings, as we expect them to be perfect, to be amazing speakers, to have all the answers…and it’s because we expect these people to BE our answers…instead of understanding that WE ALL are the answers. We want the best people to become president, to be perfect, as they are running the country…but we put unrealistic expectations on people. Celebrities or higher ups…they are human just like us, they make mistakes just like us, and we feel it’s ok to crucify someone for making a mistake.

I took a non-credit course at the University of Tennessee this past month and it was a crash course into stand up comedy. A friend of mine and I figured it would help better our public speaking as people want to be entertained more than just told they need to change…so if you can entertain people while enlightening them, the change can be more powerful

The class was 5 weeks followed by an open mic night on the 6th week …and I’m pretty sure I bombed my open mic performance. My first joke, there actually were crickets in the audience after I told it…and I was like, “oh no this isn’t going to end too well.”

And after my act I felt bad after because you want to do amazing, you want your first time to be where people give you a standing ovation…but that’s not realistic. I’ve heard that at famous stand-up comedy clubs it’s hard to get in to do a small skit for a comedian unless they’ve been doing an open mic night every week for 2 years. And so when I went home and was done crying myself to sleep from failing… ok not crying maybe just weeping silently…I felt good the next day because I faced my fear. I faced the chance of being heckled, and it made me more conscious of how to be a better speaker and how to think about adding entertaining elements in different spots purposefully. It got me thinking more creatively.

And so while I could’ve been crucified for even trying to get up there… I was proud that I did it. I was proud that I failed and had a new perspective, and I was proud that I didn’t apologize for being me. So no matter what anyone thought about me that night…I really don’t care. I don’t care whether they loved me or hated me…sure I wanted them to like it…but that event wasn’t about them…it was about me…and if they were entertained…well, then that was a bonus. And I’m not going to appologize for being myself. I giggle at my silly stupid jokes all the time, and I giggled up on stage at them when I told them. So I made the most important person laugh I wanted to…me…I make no apologies for being me…and I hope you make no apologies for being you.

Today’s Personal Commitment:
How can you accept yourself unequivocally today? How can you feel comfortable and confident in being the person you are? I know sometimes when a person passes me that I respect I may compare myself to them… which makes me feel bad…so instead of comparing or criticizing yourself for not being perfect today…what if you were to pivot from that negative thought and congratulate yourself for getting up and trying today? What if you were to not apologize but to thank yourself for being you? No one’s perfect, and no one’s asking you to be perfect except yourself…so find a saying that resonates with you about loving yourself today…whether it be…I’m glad I am me, and I’m glad I am growing every day from my mistakes…or you find another one that resonates more with you.

Today I ask you to NOT to apologize to anyone, even yourself…for being you. You are amazing.

I Make NO Apologies For Being Myself

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by:
- Zest by basematic (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
- I Have Often Told You Stories (guitar instrumental) by Ivan Chew (c) copyright 2013 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

Synergy Saturdays-#294 The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

I Am A Gift

I spent years sabotaging myself thinking I didn’t deserve anything. I spent years on an exhaustive journey of trying to work to earn things that I felt I didn’t deserve…Because I felt I didn’t deserve ANYTHING. I had to change my perception about myself to change what I earned. And when you learn to love yourself first before the work…and then put in the hard work, you will see that things will happen not because you’re lucky but because you are worthy.

You are a gift, you aren’t a burden, you are worthy to have wonderful things in this life…not just because you will work for them…but because you will love yourself while you work for them. And that’s why I had so much trouble moving forward, because I believed I didn’t deserve certain things, and I believed that if I struggled then maybe I could be happy. …which shut off the Universe from giving me more because I always found a way to shut the door to what was coming my way.

Sometimes I think that we believe if something happens easily for us that maybe we aren’t deserving it. And I do believe we should be industrious and work hard, but when we work hard for a period of time things do get easier for us.  So I think hard work should be a habit we naturally gravitate towards, but also we accept the gifts that come our way because of our collected efforts. When you live a life of scratching tooth and nail to get what you want, it doesn’t feel right to have things happen easily for you or having things handed to us on a silver platter.  It seems too good to be true as we are waiting for the other shoe to fall…we don’t want to get our hopes up and be disappointed…again

But you are worthy for great things, it’s good to put in the hard work to make something happen, but it’s also good to accept what comes into your life without putting expectations on yourself. When you love someone in your life unconditionally, whether it be your children or your parents…would you ever say…sorry but you aren’t getting my love currently…you didn’t earn it today? 

You probably wouldn’t…so why are you treating yourself that way then?

You are a gift, you are a blessing, you are worthy, you are worth the effort…and you are what this world needs. Put in your time, but know that you are worthy to accept what the Universe brings your way. You deserve great things not just because you did the work…but because you are you…and that’s an amazing thing. Be you, and know you are a blessing.

Today’s Personal Commitment:
Reward yourself today… just because. What is something that’s unique and something you’d enjoy in your life that you could give to yourself? Have it be something you normally don’t reward or do for yourself.

I Am A Gift

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by:
- Zest by basematic (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
- I Have Often Told You Stories (guitar instrumental) by Ivan Chew (c) copyright 2013 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

Fantastic Fridays-#293 The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

Every Monkey Wrench Is Secretly A Blessing

I was on my daily walk, and there’s a runner that I see almost every day, and we always say hello and cheer one another on as we pass each other. Some days when I’m feeling energetic enough I will jog with him a few times around the outdoor loop. He’s such a kind individual, and on our talk the other day he told me that we all have gifts. Like how a smart person can open a book and get the concept of it right away, and he said “that’s not me…but I can look at any day and find the beauty in it. There’s something to be learned in every moment.”

I hadn’t seen him for a few weeks, and on our recent talk I asked him where he’d been, and he said he was healing up an injured hamstring. He said he could’ve been upset about the injury, but he saw it as an opportunity to work on other areas that he’s weak in.

And I think that’s what we do, we have expectations of performing how we did yesterday, and some people would look at a hamstring injury as putting a monkey wrench in their plans…but he found a way to see the beauty in it.

He’s one of those individuals who lives a different life. He doesn’t own a cell phone and doesn’t use a lot of technology. He has lived a full life as he has owned multiple businesses, and is now retired at a young age from that, and only does day trading now.

As we continued to jog, he went on to tell me how the days will fly by so quickly, that him and his wife have a joke about it… as they’ll say, “it’s Friday already where did the time go, and then the next day they will say it’s Saturday…where did the time go?”

Further into our conversation he said there’s a lot of time in the day to do the things we want. He didn’t even bat an eyelash when he said this to me… “I ran 30 miles in 3 hours and 30 minutes yesterday. I could run 200 miles in a week if I just put in the time to do it…it’s amazing how much you can accomplish when you put your attention on what’s important to you…that there’s so much time in this life to do so many things.”

After he told me this I knew I was actually talking to superman. But he was on to something so profound and so simple…that what makes us come alive, if we put in the time we can do amazing things. The hours are going to pass us regardless, so where do you want to accumulate your hours? Do you want them to be on things that you despise and hate, or will you see the beauty in your day as you focus on what you truly like in the moment?

As he said earlier, that there are gifted people who can look at a book and decipher the message immediately, I told him that he can look at any situation and decipher the beauty within it…and I think that’s his super power. He doesn’t look at all the miles he has to run, he just finds a pretty trail or outdoor running loop and just enjoys his time on it.

We spend so much time in our lives thinking about where we don’t want to be, focusing on what we don’t want to be doing, and being upset at where we are…which then…we miss the beautiful place of where we truly are. My running friend told me how I’ve changed his life…and I was floored because I don’t do anything except wave to him and say some encouraging words from time to time when we chat…But the funny thing is his kindness does the same to me.

The people we stumble into upon the trails of our lives can change our lives if we allow them to. They help us to see a different view, they help us to step out of our shoes and see that there’s beauty in every moment…and that for every monkey wrench, there’s a lesson or chance that’s helping us to work on something else we are weaker in…until we heal and are ready to come back to what we’re strong in.

Today’s Personal Commitment:
What monkey wrench has come into your life that you’ve seen as a curse…and how can you pivot and see it as a blessing? Get a pad of paper out and take a look at the hard things that have happened to you over the past 5 years…

• Write about how it affected at that time, and how you saw the event when it was happening. Write what you remember in going through it.
• Then write about how that event brought you to somewhere better. And if it didn’t bring you to a better place or you’re still struggling with it, then write how you would like to see it and how it could be the lesson and blessing that you need?

Every Monkey Wrench Is Secretly A Blessing

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by:
- Zest by basematic (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
- I Have Often Told You Stories (guitar instrumental) by Ivan Chew (c) copyright 2013 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license.
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide