The Struggles Podcast

Welcome back to another episode of The Struggles with Sean Li and James Park!

Ever caught yourself standing in front of your wardrobe for way longer than you'd like to admit, trying to decide what to wear? You're not alone. In this episode, we’ll share some unique hacks to simplify your daily decisions so you can have more time and energy to focus on what truly matters!

From what to eat or wear to more pivotal life decisions, we'll walk you through our strategies and experiences. Hear about our recent personal and professional triumphs that include adventures across the globe and a recent move to Las Vegas. Be prepared for an engaging conversation as we reflect on our roller-coaster journey over the past two months. 

Whether you're a golfing enthusiast, a seasoned traveler, or someone looking to simplify daily decision-making, there's something for everyone in this episode. Tune in for an engaging discussion about eliminating inconsequential decisions from our lives to make room for ones that matter. 

*Struggles podcast is produced by Ventures FM.*

On what he has learned after a year of being a sales associate

James: Honestly, this job is one of the hardest jobs I've ever had. I don't know how much longer I can do it, but I know that I have a higher goal, right? A higher purpose. Sometimes it feels like I'm going backward. It feels like I'm regressing in my skills to be able to talk to people, to be able to cold call people, and it doesn't actually ever get easier. You think that at some point, it's going to get easier, but you become more, I guess, comfortable with the uneasiness. I don't know if this really relates to a golf swing, but for every swing, you have to focus. You can't just not really think about your swing. At any point you could fuck up. So, it's not necessarily that things get easier, it's just you become more comfortable with your routine, your process. You just keep swinging. I'm at a point where I'm still swinging, but I do have to take a step back and think about how I'm approaching a lot of my swings now, a lot of my cold calls. Slowly improving there, but I still think I have a lot to improve on.

Life is a grind.

Sean: One thing to keep in mind is a lot of things in life is a grind. It's a grind until it gets better. Some certain things might seem like it's more enjoyable than others from the outside, but it's still a fucking grind.

James: Maybe it’s that you like something enough that you're willing to go through the grind.

On sticking with things that matter

Sean: When I think about how I make my decisions to stick with something, there's definitely always a high-arching goal. That's how I stick with things. Not to say I stick with everything. But the things I do decide to follow through on, I'm very patient with it. There's always an overarching objective that keeps me going.

Welcome back to another episode of The Struggles with Sean Li and James Park!

After a month-long hiatus, we're excited to share our latest conversation with you all. This time, we dive into the reality of daily struggles and how embracing them can help us overcome life, business, and career challenges. From our own experiences to company-wide offsites, we discuss the importance of mindset and self-care when navigating life's obstacles.

We also explore the significance of finding meaning and identity outside of our work. We touch on the inspiring stories of our coworkers who have cultivated their passions while maintaining their careers, such as a world champion skydiver and a talented musician. We believe that having a greater purpose or passion outside of our jobs can fuel our motivation and make our daily struggles more bearable.

Lastly, we discuss the power of perspective and the role it plays in our personal growth. Whether it's involving kids in food choices or adjusting to different time zones during work trips, a shift in perspective can make all the difference. Join us as we share valuable insights, personal stories, and practical advice on navigating life's daily struggles.

Pursuing your passion outside of work/Do not let your career define your identity

James: I think a lot of people kind of go through the struggle of when they have a job, and they're trying to figure out why am I still doing this job? What's important is to have some motivation aside from just the work. You should be doing something aside from your main job. And for a lot of people, it comes down to family and relationships, but it can also be your hobbies, your passion, whatever you're truly passionate about, whatever you truly really want to do with your life, what you enjoy doing, and I thought that was really cool. I kind of grew up with the identity of I'm someone who just works, and I'm slowly starting to get out of that kind of mindset where I rely on work to define who I am.

Golf as a business tool

Sean: I used to feel guilty about playing so much golf, but I realized it is something that I wanted to commit to, and maybe there's an excuse that I'm giving myself, but I do think it's a reality for me, where it's like a tool that I want to have in my bag and my tool belts. And I want that because, from a business perspective, I want to be able to hang with people that play golf and talk business. I think that's why I'm just so committed to it.

Sean and James have been traveling for the last few weeks, and this episode is a quick recap of what's been happening. 

They talked a little bit about work (Let's congratulate James for hitting his quota for the first time!), vitamins and supplements (Do they really work?), and the struggles of traveling with kids and how to overcome them.

They also discussed ways to measure your life - celebrating the small wins leading up to the bigger ones.

Struggles on feeling you are doing enough

James: There's some kind of very thin line between feeling okay with where you're at, being enough, feeling that you're doing enough, and the feeling that you should be doing more. That's a constant struggle.

On traveling with kids

Sean: Take it easy. Don't hold expectations for what kids should be doing or what you should be doing. Just go with the flow.

Sean recently finished the book, A Course in Miracles Made Easy: Mastering the Journey from Fear to Love. And this is the center of today's episode.

We deep dive into the idea of living in fear versus living in the state of love. How does someone live without fear? How do you live in a state of love despite judgment? Is love just the absence of fear? Let’s uncover these questions one by one.

• Enlightenment is constantly choosing to live in a state of love and not in a state of fear.
• You are enough as yourself in this moment. 
• Beware of your fears.

On living without fear

Sean: It’s a constant practice. Every time I get frustrated, it's an opportunity to evaluate and interrupt myself. I still don't know how to be in a state of love, but what I've been practicing is how to not be in a state of fear.

James: It seems almost like once you get down to the fear and realize that it's something you don't have to worry about, that is actually when the state change into love. Or is there another step there? Eliminating fear is one thing; is living in love just by identifying what your fear is, is that all that is?

Sean and James talk about communication and the importance of staying in touch with family, friends, and people who matter to you. But how do you determine who they are? 

If you struggle with being intentional about who you want to stay in touch with, tune in and enjoy the episode. 

• Communication is key in any relationship.
• Even within family, there are misunderstandings.
• Just because you grew up with someone, even if you're blood-related, doesn't mean you have a given relationship to hold onto. You still have to work on it. 

What is communication debt?

Sean: This is a theme that I am very passionate about. We kind of just assume our parents and family know what we're up to, or know what we're thinking. Or they assume that we know what they're thinking and what they're up to, what they're going through. And the reality is we don't. And so, it's even more important to communicate more with family so that know exactly what you're thinking and what you're going through. Because when you don't, then just like any friendship, it creates distance, it creates an information gap where there's an immense amount of room for misunderstanding. 

"Investing" in relationships

James: I think at some point, you no longer have to deposit into that fund, especially if you feel that there's gonna be no return. The reason why I say this is because there are definitely people that I no longer try to keep in touch with anymore because after some time you just realize that they don't want to be part of the relationship. It's a choice that you make at some point where you'll invest elsewhere. Your time is limited.

Managing your expectations when trying to build relationships/communicate with new or old people in your life

James: For anyone that is in a place where they're struggling with some relationship or trying to either revamp one or bring one to light or to make a new one or to reach out to a friend that you haven't reached out to in a while, I think, one, you just have to expect that you can get nothing in return because that is the worst outcome. And then the best outcome would be that they reply and they give back. But you can't expect that. And who is receiving your effort just changes over time.

Sean and James talk about gratitude and how they shape their worldviews.

Sean shares about his first personal annual update to his close friends and how he turns some struggles as a parent into a practice of gratitude. 

They talk through their different points of view on patience and trust, and how trust is foundational to a lot of things that we do in life.

Side note from Sean and James: We decided to drop “Startup” in our title and just go with “The Struggles.” Our topics have grown to include more than just the difficulties of a startup, and we thought this title was more fitting!

• The challenge in parenting is not the child. The child is just being the child. 
• Patience depends on trust.

Sean on patience and trust in relation to anxiety

A lot of times with a lot of things that we experience in life, the whole basis of anxiety is that you don't feel patient. We don't have the patience to see it out. To let the fears play out. And we don't have the patience because we don't trust the process. We don't trust that things are gonna be fine.

James on having patience and trusting the process

Having patience means that you are trusting that you'll eventually get to where you need to get to. It does mean that you have to be putting in the work. And it might take much longer than you actually ever thought with adjustments that you have to make, lessons that you learn every single day, and changing your process slightly to be more effective and efficient.

No matter how far along you get in life or how many successes and failures you go through, there's always a reason to be discontent. How do we combat that?

In this episode, James and Sean catch up on what happened last week and review how they did on their weekly goals. They discuss contentment in their day-to-day activities and Sean gives the latest update about Clever.

• Shift your perspective and find contentment by zooming out instead of zooming in.
• The path to success is paved with failures.
• Success is not about what you get done today. Success is what you do slowly, little by little, every single day. 

Sean on having the right perspective when doing comparisons

You can't not compare, but you can also choose what to compare and what to compare it to. It's really about trying to find the right perspective. I think that's a muscle to exercise mentally. 

Sean on why people don't get to reach their yearly goals

People tend to overestimate what they can accomplish in a day and underestimate what they can accomplish in a year. That's the anxiety that I feel like a lot of people these days live with. They feel like they need to get so much done in a day, but then that anxiety ends up being detrimental. They don't end up getting that much done in a year because they're just paralyzed every single day.

James on how to build the habit of finishing tasks

I think the idea for creating a habit, or even creating a task for you to take care of, is that the task should feel so simple you know exactly what to do. It needs to be way more specific and action-oriented and you should be able to take that action without having to think about it. 

In this episode, Sean and James discuss the plague of trying to do too much and the paradox of choice.

They talk about why this can be difficult and some ways to work around it like prioritizing. 

Taking all the essential stuff out, if you only had one hour of free time just for yourself, what would you do? 

• Priority should be a singular word.
• Trying to accomplish too much creates a large barrier where you don't even wanna start. Start with just one thing that you want to accomplish in a set duration of time. 

On picking only one thing to prioritize

Sean: With a limited time, you honestly should just pick one to work on. It's been really helpful for me to do that. I feel a lot less stressed and happier about it because I'm able to just improve one thing at a time.

How does someone choose what they're prioritizing?

Sean: I think it shows by your actions. What do you keep doing of all the things that you listed, right? What are you consistently doing? Even two or three days out of the week and then just stick to that for now. 

James: I think what you could do, if you're struggling with a paradox of choice and having way too much to do you don't feel like you can get to all of it, maybe practice picking something for your mind, picking something for your body, and picking something for your soul.

This episode is about life satisfaction.

It's the beginning of the year, and maybe you’re already behind on your new year’s resolution and feeling dissatisfied. Listen to Sean and James talk about their own dissatisfactions and how they work with these feelings.

• Comparison can cause dissatisfaction. Be intentional about what you're comparing in life. 
• Actively choose what you want to be dissatisfied about and work on it.

James on satisfaction

No matter what I surrounded myself with, if I was not satisfied with myself and how I am now, nothing would change that. It all comes down to kind of a mindset. You have to be satisfied with where you are now.

Sean on accepting this moment in time

When we accept something, we're just accepting the “here and now”. We're not accepting “here and now” in the future. I think the common misconception is that our acceptance seals our fate.

In the very first episode of this year, 2023, Sean and James talk about new year resolutions.

Although they both don't like it, they agree it is a helpful tool. They talk about routines and how we can change the new resolutions to work for us and how to have more grace for ourselves.

• New year resolutions need to start with the right mindset and expectations.
• Resolutions can be large or small, each with its own unique approach towards accomplishment.
• Resolutions can start any day of the year.

James on starting now

It sounds like a great idea. Fresh start gives you something to look forward to, work towards, but it's a constructed time. If you really want to achieve something or if you really want to change your life or anything, you can start now. It doesn't matter at what point of the year it is. 

Sean on no better day than today

What bothers me about it is like, well, if you think you can delay changing, then you'll always think you can delay changing. You start the resolution, you're like, you know what? I don't feel like it this month. I'm gonna change next month. You can always procrastinate change, and I think that's what New Year's resolution bugs me the most, this perpetual procrastination delay of change. It instills this idea that you don't have to change yet if you don't want to. Obviously, you don't have to change if you don't want to, but if you really want to make a change though there's no better day to start than today.