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Covid vaccine + medieval torture devices = good times in Romania; It's like West Side Story... but Cats; If Donald Trump were still president, we'd have sauce; Bezos' new yacht comes with an extra yacht.
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A copious amount of babies is delivered by a woman in Mali; a Japanese town funds its priorities; the cicadas are coming, and they're ready for a good time.
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Joe Biden doesn't actually want to take away your hamburger; Justin Bieber appropriates black culture with the approval of black culture; An Arkansas man affiliated with the Capitol Insurrection can't spell; Rick Santorum needs a history lesson.
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Demi Lovato, froyo activist, takes a stand for what really matters; Chilean vets try some unorthodox vaccination methods; NASA are cowards and made a wimpy helicopter; a Grizzlies fan throats tacos at his own risk.
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Alien sightings sweep the U.S.; Prince Philip is a god; an Alabama government official gets kinky.
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Mitch McConnell likes Coca-Cola and he can fly; if it wasn't already, Florida is about to be a radioactive wasteland; Vladmir Putin continues his human rights campaign; a Tennessee woman tries new tactics to speed up the drive-thru.
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Benjamin Brown has an alarming new fashion statement, and an even more alarming religious awakening; The Arab authorities are cracking down on adult drinkware; Both Benjamin and the Suez Canal are backed up this week; The Earth should be in the clear for the next 100 years.
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Surprise! The chemicals in plastic are bad for you; It started with a simple picture on Twitter, and now General Mills, Topanga from "Boy Meets World", and the scientific community are all at odds; The President of Poland and his party have fragile egos... and are all morons.
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Seven sharks find freedom after being held captive in New York basement; The Taliban sees 12 year old girls singing as a threat; Benjamin Brown and Joseph Bransworth have big plans for the stimmy.
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Obese Baptist pastor tells women to stop being fat; Elon Musk colonizes Texas; Papa John can't stop saying the 'N-word.'
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From the publisher's feed
Are you tired of the news? Are you berated by booshwash? Are you downright done with this decade? If so, join co-anchors Joseph Bransworth and Benjamin Brown for a novel news experience like no…

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