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Some of you will love this one. Some will still need a bit more nudging. :)

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Day 4 - The quiet leap from “wish” to “promise” can turn a cheerful list into a Christmas morning flashpoint. We explore how kids interpret lists as expectations, why that creates friction, and the simple language you can use to keep the joy high and the drama low. Drawing from real family moments, we break down a short pre-holiday conversation that validates hope, sets loving boundaries, and gives you room to surprise. You’ll hear how to introduce clear limits without sounding harsh, and how to use the top-three method so your child feels heard while you stay realistic about budget and values.

By the end, you’ll have a simple toolkit for expectation-setting, prioritizing, and designing an unwrapping sequence that feels fair and fun. If you’re ready to swap uncertainty for clarity and keep the magic intact, press play and try the script with your kids tonight. If this helped, follow the show, share it with a friend who’s staring at a mile-long list, and leave a quick review to tell us your favorite expectation hack.

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Day 3 includes a bit of crafting. Again - pick this one up if it feels right. And don't if it makes you feel like you wanna pull your hair out. :)

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Day 2 is all about counting down. And even though we are just a few days away, your kids might still need this one!

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Hey there friend. I am re-posting this year for a few tips - but rather than one at a time, I am posting 5 today and then 5 each day between now and Christmas Eve. Take what feels right. Leave what doesn't. It's all about what matters most for you and your family this season. :)

Enjoy Day 1.

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Hey friends. This holiday season, I am grateful to share a story that is quite vulnerable for me. My hope in sharing is that someone needs this encouragement today - like I have needed in so many moments over the last decade. Thank you for loving me well and following along the podcast!

The story starts with a single itchy spot and unfolds into a decade-long battle that touched every part of life—body, mind, and spirit. I share what it felt like to spiral each evening, why secrecy fed my shame, and how a simple, brave choice to let people in began to change the experience. As a psychologist, I understood the importance of support, yet I still fought the very human urge to hide. That tension, and the relief that followed, set the stage for a turning point I never saw coming.

We walk through the medical odyssey—clean blood work, reassuring biopsies, and the maddening feeling of being told I was “healthy” while my skin told a louder truth. I talk about the resilience it takes to keep calling specialists, the discouragement of repeated insurance denials, and the quiet faith that carried me through nights when hope felt thin. Then the plot twists: a nudge to check for a cancellation, a dermatologist who immediately recognized the pattern, and a new biologic that promised help with minimal side effects. The approvals didn’t come easy, but when the phone finally rang on my birthday, everything shifted.

You’ll hear about the first injection and the immediate relief, the joy of taking a hot bath without fear for the first time in years, and the gratitude that comes when daily suffering finally loosens its grip. This is a conversation about chronic itching and dermatology, yes—but more than that, it’s about persistence, self-compassion, and faith in the face of setbacks. If you’re navigating a chronic condition, fighting shame, or searching for answers, I hope this encourages you to keep going and to let someone walk with you. If the story resonates, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs hope, and leave a review to help others find their way here.

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Sharing another one of my favorite episodes from Kids These Days...

Depression in kids doesn’t always look like sadness. Often it shows up as irritability, anger, “I don’t care,” and a slow fade from hobbies, friends, and motivation. In this candid, practical conversation, Dr. Beth Tremell walks through the clearest signs of youth depression, how they differ from adult patterns, and the simple phrases parents can use to open a safe, direct conversation—without making things worse.

We unpack real-world red flags like drastic sleep shifts, appetite changes, chronic fatigue, harsh self-talk, and school or friendship struggles. You’ll hear calm, evidence-aligned ways to ask about suicidal thoughts—questions like “Do you want to die or stop hurting?”—and why bringing this up reduces isolation rather than creating risk. Dr. Beth shares how to respond when a child says “maybe I should just die,” how to stay steady in the moment, and what details matter for getting the right level of help.

Support is both emotional and practical: being physically present to counter the “island” of depression, setting gentle routines, and connecting with professionals. We outline when to call the pediatrician, how to find a therapist, and why school-based services—counselors, social workers, school psychologists—can be vital when community waitlists are long. Throughout, you’ll get clear, compassionate guidance for gauging severity by impact on grades, friendships, and daily life, plus small steps that build momentum back.

If you’re a parent, caregiver, or educator trying to tell the difference between a rough week and something deeper, this conversation gives you language, structure, and next steps. Listen, share with someone who needs it, and subscribe for more practical mental health guidance. If there’s a topic you want us to cover next, reach out and let us know.

This podcast is meant to be a resource for the general public, as well as fellow therapists/psychologists. It is NOT meant to replace the meaningful work of individual or family therapy. Please seek professional help in your area if you are struggling. #breakthestigma #makewordsmatter #thingsyoulearnintherapy #thingsyoulearnintherapypodcast

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health concerns, please contact 988 or seek a treatment provider in your area.

If you are a therapist or psychologist and want to be a guest on the show, please complete this form to apply: https://forms.gle/ooy8QirpgL2JSLhP6

Feel free to share your thoughts at www.makewordsmatterforgood.com or email me at [email protected]

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Sharing some of my favorite throwback episodes from Kids These Days...

What if the first second of your response could change how your teen handles anxiety? We unpack a practical, compassionate approach to big feelings that begins with a steady face and ends with stronger connection. No jargon, no lectures—just a clear framework you can use tonight.

We start with the counterintuitive move that lowers the temperature fast: fix your face. Learn why a neutral, grounded expression and tone signal safety to a nervous system on high alert—and how to repair quickly if your surprise or frustration slips out. Then we pivot to co-regulation, using short prompts and shared breathing to slow runaway thoughts. Instead of shutting worries down, we draw them out with simple questions that shrink vague fears into specific, manageable pieces.

With calm restored, we shift to consent. You’ll hear scripts that honor autonomy: “Do you want my take?” and “What should we do together?” When teens say yes, we offer concise, doable steps instead of lectures. When they say no, we respect the boundary—and keep the door open. We also map out the follow-up rhythm that builds trust over time: a light touch the next day, a check-in later in the week, and a watchful eye for changes in mood, sleep, school, and friendships. Finally, we cover how and when to seek professional support, frame it as teamwork, and navigate waitlists while keeping momentum at home.

If you’ve ever wondered how to help without hovering, how to listen without minimizing, or how to advise without taking over, this guide to teen anxiety gives you the tools. Expect practical language you can borrow, evidence-informed reasoning for each step, and a steady reminder that presence beats perfection. If this helped, share it with a friend who’s supporting a worried teen, subscribe for more science-backed parenting strategies, and leave a review to tell us which step made the biggest difference.

This podcast is meant to be a resource for the general public, as well as fellow therapists/psychologists. It is NOT meant to replace the meaningful work of individual or family therapy. Please seek professional help in your area if you are struggling. #breakthestigma #makewordsmatter #thingsyoulearnintherapy #thingsyoulearnintherapypodcast

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health concerns, please contact 988 or seek a treatment provider in your area.

If you are a therapist or psychologist and want to be a guest on the show, please complete this form to apply: https://forms.gle/ooy8QirpgL2JSLhP6

Feel free to share your thoughts at www.makewordsmatterforgood.com or email me at [email protected]

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Sharing some of my favorite episodes from Kids These Days... 

Ever find yourself locked in a standoff with a kid and wondering why your go‑to lines aren’t working? We dig into three everyday phrases that seem efficient but quietly sabotage trust and cooperation, then share simple replacements that calm the room and still get things done. As a licensed psychologist and educator, I unpack why “Because I said so,” identity‑tinged labels, and “There’s no reason to cry” can escalate conflict and seed shame—and what to say instead.

We start by reframing authority with short, honest reasons and shared routines that reduce pushback. You’ll hear how a family code word creates a clean pause, how first‑time listening agreements take shape, and why the brain shifts from fight to think when expectations are clear. From there, we replace character attacks with crisp I‑statements that name impact without wounding identity, then build a habit of de‑escalation: state the feeling, give space, return to problem solving when everyone’s calm.

Finally, we tackle emotional validation. Tears are data, not defiance. Learn how to meet big feelings with simple noticing, offer language like sad, embarrassed, or hurt, and guide kids toward faster recovery and stronger self‑awareness. Along the way, we point you to blog resources with more phrases and scripts you can use right away. If you’re a parent, teacher, or caregiver who wants fewer power struggles and more connection—without giving up boundaries—this conversation is your field guide.

If these ideas help, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs a reset, and leave a quick review so others can find it. Tell me the most unhelpful phrase you’re retiring and what you’re replacing it with—I’d love to feature your ideas next time.

Check out THREE MORE UNHELPFUL things we say to kids at:
www.bethtrammell.com/blog
Blog — Beth Trammell

This podcast is meant to be a resource for the general public, as well as fellow therapists/psychologists. It is NOT meant to replace the meaningful work of individual or family therapy. Please seek professional help in your area if you are struggling. #breakthestigma #makewordsmatter #thingsyoulearnintherapy #thingsyoulearnintherapypodcast

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health concerns, please contact 988 or seek a treatment provider in your area.

If you are a therapist or psychologist and want to be a guest on the show, please complete this form to apply: https://forms.gle/ooy8QirpgL2JSLhP6

Feel free to share your thoughts at www.makewordsmatterforgood.com or email me at [email protected]

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Joined by my friend from Core Essential Values, Leslie Bolser, we dig in to TRUST!! 

Trust doesn’t arrive with a grand gesture; it’s built in the tiny moments we repeat. We dive into what makes a parent truly dependable and why predictability—not perfection—is the foundation kids need to feel safe, open up, and keep coming back to us when it matters most. If you’ve ever wondered how to start building trust today, we break it down into moves you can use before the next pickup line ends.

We begin by reframing trust for families as dependable confidence and explain why predictability beats the myth of always-on consistency. Life shifts, energy dips, and answers vary, but our kids can still know how we’ll respond. That steady pattern creates safety, and safety is the gateway to trust. We share a simple language tool—the “circle of trust”—that sets clear boundaries for private conversations and empowers kids to ask for confidentiality with respect. You’ll hear how this phrase travels with children as they grow, helping them make wiser choices about what to share and with whom.

From there, we move into everyday practices. Think presence over performance: put down the phone, make eye contact, and let their agenda lead during re-entry moments after school or practice. Learn to attune to the emotion beneath the story—loneliness, embarrassment, pride—before you offer perspective. And when you miss it, repair out loud. Owning your missteps models accountability and actually deepens trust over time. Along the way, we connect these ideas to school, sports, and family dynamics, showing how steady responses help kids navigate relationships, set expectations, and feel grounded even when life is busy.

If you’re ready to trade perfection for reliability, this conversation gives you clear steps and warm encouragement. Subscribe for more practical episodes on parenting, communication, and emotional health, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review to help others find the show.

This podcast is meant to be a resource for the general public, as well as fellow therapists/psychologists. It is NOT meant to replace the meaningful work of individual or family therapy. Please seek professional help in your area if you are struggling. #breakthestigma #makewordsmatter #thingsyoulearnintherapy #thingsyoulearnintherapypodcast

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health concerns, please contact 988 or seek a treatment provider in your area.

If you are a therapist or psychologist and want to be a guest on the show, please complete this form to apply: https://forms.gle/ooy8QirpgL2JSLhP6

Feel free to share your thoughts at www.makewordsmatterforgood.com or email me at [email protected]

Support the show

www.bethtrammell.com