Unconsoleable

Surprise, surprise, Jessica is still not happy about Apple’s featuring changes. Will nothing satisfy her? Maybe only things with candy can do that. That’s right, Jessica may have gone deeper down the Candy Crush rabbit hole this week. But don’t judge her! Or judge her a lot, your choice! ;-p

We also hear about Jessica’s adventure’s in VR-land, Anna’s misadventures with another arty game, Monument Valley Year Two numbers, and much more!

Please rate and review us on iTunes, follow us on Twitter (and follow Jessica and Annatoo), like us on Facebook, buy our merch, and email us if you have even more hilarious name ideas for games King can make with Blizzard or Activision IP.

Stuff we mentioned:

• Candy Crush Jelly Saga (iOS & Android)
• HTC Vive
• Omega Agent
• Catlateral Damage
• Fallen London (iOS only)
• Rare Sloth
• Land Sliders (iOS & Android)
• Love You to Bits (iOS only for now)
• NO THING (iOS & Android)
• Uncharted accessibility
• Lost Journey (iOS & Android)
• Disney Tsum Tsum (iOS & Android)
• Slide the Shakes (iOS & Android)
• Mekorama (iOS & Android)
• King/Activision/Blizzard merger
• King looking to make games w/Blizzard IP
• Ustwo posts more Monument Valley data
• Thailand military coup good for mobile games
• Casual Connect

This episode was sponsored by Drobo, a family of safe, expandable, and simple-to-use storage arrays. Visit them now to learn more and be sure to use the discount code UN100 to save $100 on your purchase of a Drobo Mini, Drobo 5D, Drobo 5N, or any 8-drive or 12-drive Drobo in the Drobo Store.

Anna thinks things are looking up as there were some great games out this week, but Jessica finds cause to complain about the way Apple is handling featuring lately. And the complaints don’t end there!

Both your hosts also try to make peace with the fact that we didn’t drop Candy Crush Soda Saga as swiftly as we expected to. This week’s hot topic was a piece that claimed that the gaming industry is aging us out. Is it? Elsewhere, should no one have been surprised that Nintendo’s mobile games will be free-to-play? We dig into all this and more.

Please rate and review us on iTunes, follow us on Twitter (and follow Jessica and Annatoo), like us on Facebook and email us if you know how to get cat hair off a Drobo or… anything else :-p

Stuff we mentioned:

• Candy Crush Soda Saga (iOS & Android)
• Nowhere: Lost Memories (iOS only)
• Disney Tsum Tsum (iOS & Android)
• King Rabbit (iOS only)
• New Instagram icon (there was some brouhaha)
• Bushido Bear (iOS & Android)
• Runaway Toad (iOS only)
• Leap Day (iOS & Android)
• Nitrome
• Rust Bucket (iOS & Android)
• Cracked article on gaming aging you out
• The Cat Lady
• Ori and the Blind Forest
• Miitomo (iOS & Android)
• Pocket Gamer Biz column about Nintendo
• Apple might make a car (!!!!)
• App review times cut to a day
• Check out our merch!

Games are BLAH lately; where is the excitement?? INKS is great, but we’ve been playing it forever now and nothing else interesting seems to be coming out. We are boooooored.

Trying to find something new and fun, Anna bravely wades back into the featured games and finds out that yep, they still suck. Meanwhile Jessica gives the Uncharted mobile game a whirl, and both of your hosts admit to something they aren’t proud of.

The news is full of depressing stuff, Anna has to be bleeped for the first time ever, and much, much more awaits you!

Please rate and review us on iTunes, follow us on Twitter (and follow Jessica and Annatoo), like us on Facebook and email us if you live in a foreign country we can possibly move to come November :-(

Stuff we mentioned:

• UNCHARTED: Fortune Hunter (iOS & Android)
• Candy Crush Soda Saga (iOS & Android)
• Fallen London (iOS only)
• Boombit
• Ball Escape gameplay video (out May 12)
• Black Hole Joyrider (iOS only)
• Super Smash the Office (iOS & Android)
• INKS (iOS only)
• Out There (iOS & Android)
• Trump's Wall (iOS & Android)
• Mobile games implicated in German rail accident
• Our episode with Barry
• ZeptoLab
• Kotaku story about this
• ZeptoLab "apologizes"
• Bioshock Infinite
• Gamasutra post by ZeptoLab
• Impact of featuring is decreasing
• App Store search was down
• Nielsen will rate mobile games

Choose evil

Hang onto your hats, ladies and gents! Anna and Jessica played one of the Candy Crush games. You can pick your jaw up off the floor now and have no fear, we played other stuff too :)

In other news, it turns out there are some good reasons for why touch controls can be so bad. But we’re not letting developers totally off the hook just yet.

And can the founder of Atari make great mobile games? He certainly seems to think so, but what do we think?

Please rate and review us on iTunes, follow us on Twitter (and follow Jessica and Anna too), like us on Facebook and email us if you think you can save mobile games so Nolan Bushnell doesn’t have to :-p

Stuff we mentioned:

•  Fallen London (iOS only)
• Sunless Sea
• Runaway Toad (iOS only)
• Adam & Bex Saltsman
• Finji
• Vine w/the Saltsmans' daughter
• Canabalt (iOS, Android & Steam)
• Shadow Bug (iOS only)
• Til Morning's Light (iOS only)
• Looty Dungeon (iOS only)
• INKS trailer
• State of Play
• Disney Crossy Road (iOS, Android & WinPho)
• Sling Kong (iOS & Android)
• Whitaker Trebella
• Candy Crush Soda Saga (iOS & Android)
• Puzzlepops trailer
• Layton Hawkes
• List of female-hosted podcasts
• Science explains bad touch controls
• Nolan Bushnell will make mobile games
• Nintendo investors not happy
• Next Nintendo mobile games announced

I should apologize for this creepy potato but I won't –Jessica

Things haven’t been easy this week, but we’re here for you dear listeners, and the show goes on!

We played some good games—even ones we might be a little, err, ashamed of, and discussed a few truly bizarre news items. One of them is guaranteed to make your jaw drop, we promise.

Please rate and review us on iTunes, follow us on Twitter (and follow Jessica and Annatoo), like us on Facebook and email us if you can throw away things with faces 'cause we might need your help at Jessica’s house :-D

Stuff we mentioned:

• Sarah McLachlan ASPCA commercial
• Harmony remote  
• Lady Meow Meow
• Neko Atsume (iOS & Android)
• Shadow Bug (iOS only)
• Looty Dungeon (iOS only)
• Shooty Skies (iOS & Android)
• Discobeard
• Train Conductor World (iOS only)
• Sara and Death (iOS & Android)
• Chrome Death (iOS only)
• Michael Mann
• A Good Snowman is Hard to Build (iOS & Android)
• Doomsday Clicker (iOS & Android)
• Ryan at Pik Pok
• Article about peaceful games
• Boy cuts off his finger
• Cracker Jack does away with prizes
• PAX East
• Tubbs cosplayer
• We are on Google Play Music

This is not our preferred gaming face

This week we discover who the Real Gamer is on the podcast as Jessica dominates in a game that Anna can barely play.

Anna also wades into the dangerous territory of the top charts on the App Store and samples an arty game (they do exist on mobile!) that may or may not be awful. You’ll have to listen to find out.

And, of course, as is often our way, we have some important anger to share with you. You don’t have to agree with our anger of course. But you do have to listen to it :)

Please rate and review us on iTunes, follow us on Twitter (and follow Jessica and Annatoo), like us on Facebook and email us if you’re on the super secret App Store team so we can tell you what to do :D

Stuff we mentioned:

• iKlear cleaning solution
• Disney Crossy Road (iOS, Android & WinPho)
• Shadow Bug (iOS only)
• Jessica's video to help Anna
• Mutant Mudds (iOS only)
• Radiation Island (iOS only)
• Crashlands (iOS, Android & Steam)
• Evo Explores (iOS & Android)
• Sara and Death (iOS & Android)
• Killscreen article
• Ingmar Bergman's The Seventh Seal
• Our episode with Matt Ditton
• App Store secret team
• The defunct iAd
• Most people play mobile games to waste time
• Rust Bucket (iOS & Android)
• Tanya's piece on Dark Souls 3
• Manveer Heir
• Brandon Williamson
• #notGDC
• Chrome extension to replace Dark Souls
• Nerd gatekeeping sucks t-shirts

Gone fishin'

Games, games, and more games! If you’ve ever wanted to hear us spend a ton of time talking about what we’re playing, this is the episode for you!

Suuuuure, much of that time is taken up by Disney Crossy Road, but hey, what do you expect? It’s new and adorable and we’ve predictably been playing it a lot.

But don’t worry! We played lots of other games too. Some are out, some aren’t, but we have important opinions about all of them and think you’ll probably want to check them out.

We also touch on some news and along with that, what sort-of game is Jessica boycotting and why? All this and more so get to listening!

Please rate and review us on iTunes, follow us on Twitter (and follow Jessica and Annatoo), like us on Facebook and email us if your Game Center is also working now and we’ll PLAN A PARTY! :-D

Stuff we mentioned:

• iOS public beta sign-up
• Our friend Jenni
• Disney Crossy Road (iOS, Android & WinPho)
• Epbot
• Cake Wrecks
• Mekorama
• Odd Bot Out (iOS & Android)
• Martin Magni
• Looty Dungeon (iOS only for now)
• Taco Illuminati
• Miitomo (iOS & Android)
• The Alison Rapp debacle
• Pktball (iOS only for now)
• Laser Dog
• Shadow Bug (iOS only for now)
• Our friend Steve
• King Rabbit (iOS only for now)
• Furdemption (iOS only)
• Pocket Gamer top 100 mobile games list
• A Tiny Game of Pong (iOS only)
• Mobile is the biggest platform
• Facebook pays out a lot of money to game developers
• Dreadsteed (not Hearthsteed, oops!)
• Dan Gray talks to Pocket Gamer
• Til Morning's Light (iOS only)
• HTC Vive

Crossy Haunted Mansion!

At long last we bring you a chat with our awesome friend, Unconsoleable #1 fan, possibly the best Australian Matt, and oh yeah, game developer of some note, Matt Hall!

Disney Crossy Road is now out everywhere, and we talk to Matt about how this dream team-up with Big Mouse came about, what players can expect, and much more!

Matt also turns the tables and interviews Anna about her recent sojourn at GDC, and we all ponder why extreme commercial success turns into a nightmare for some developers.

Keep in mind that this episode was recorded a few weeks ago, so if there's some stuff said that doesn't make sense, that's why :-)

Please rate and review us on iTunes, follow us on Twitter (and follow Jessica and Anna too), like us on Facebook and email us if you want to apply to be our (unpaid, natch) community manager ;-p

Stuff we mentioned:

• Matt's last episode
• Our new chicken friends (just imagine plushies of this)
• Tom's excellent fashion sense
• Andrew from Spryfox
• Sam Izzo
• Flash Backward: 30 Years of Games
• Zootopia
• Haunted Mansion
• Tangled
• Big Hero 6
• Ryan Langley
• Picross 3D
• Fez
• Indie Game: The Movie
• Terraria
• Factorio
• Factorio trailer
• Stardew Valley
• Clash Royale (iOS & Android)
• Supercell
• Retry (iOS & Android)
• Our mutual friend, Liam
• Matt Ditton's episode
• Droppy Balls (iOS & Android)
• Inside Out
• Wreck-It Ralph
• iOS nightshift mode
• The Division
• Josh Boggs
• Framed (iOS & Android)
• The Unsatisfied Mind
• Edmund McMillan
• JW from Vlambeer
• Land Sliders (iOS & Android)

Cool as a capybara

It’s kind of back to normal with this episode; no more husbands and still no Matt Hall. Patience please, you’ll eventually hear the dulcet tones of that Aussie accent :-p

We did play some new games though and some of them were even good! Jessica is in the thrall of a bunny while Anna doesn’t know what to make of an adventure game she’s playing and tries to understand why people like idle clickers.

So sit back, enjoy and please don’t stalk people on LinkedIn, mmmkay?

Please rate and review us on iTunes, follow us on Twitter (and follow Jessica and Anna too), like us on Facebook and email us if you love the PS Vita (but sorry, no one cares).

Stuff we mentioned:

• Totem in Crossy Road
• Jaguar in Crossy Road
• The largest rodent on earth
• A Tiny Game of Pong (iOS only)
• Sling Kong (iOS & Android)
• King Rabbit (iOS only)
• Furdemption (iOS only)
• We made fun of the devs on this episode
• Sinless (iOS, Android & Steam)
• Doomsday Clicker (iOS & Android)
• Clicker Heroes (iOS & Android)
• Miitomo is doing well
• Get an App Store feature by being a creep
• Disney head of mobile interview
• Sony opens new mobile studio
• PS Vita

Note: not the actual men of Unconsoleable

We know you were expecting an episode with our friend Matt Hall, but hey, sh*t happens and being the pro podcasters that we are, we rolled with it.

Not only did we record a replacement episode for you, dear listeners, at the eleventh hour, but we also managed to snag the awesomest, the most amazing, the most famous guests EVAR. That’s right! Put your hands together for Anna and Jessica’s husbands, Jim and Reuben! (oh, and some guy named Moises was there too ;-p)

Finally getting their turn at the mic, the fellas gave us the lowdown on what being married to world-famous podcasters is like, divulged behind-the-scenes secrets, talked about what kinds of gamers they are, and much, much more.

So please enjoy and don’t worry, you’ll still hear Matt’s episode eventually, we promise!