What happens when counseling — something meant to bring healing — actually makes your relationship feel more fragile?

In this episode, I share my story of what it was like when my boyfriend went to counseling on his own and came back more distant. I’ll be honest: I felt powerless, angry, and confused. How could someone he’d only met for a few hours have so much influence over the future of our relationship?

We’ll unpack this heavy topic through two powerful lenses: Dr. Aaron Beck’s insights on how our thoughts shape our feelings and actions (CBT), and Dr. John Gottman’s research on how fear and defensiveness play out in relationships. And then I’ll give you something super practical: a concrete script you can use when you feel defensive, powerless, or unsure what to say.

If you’ve ever wrestled with fear that counseling might be pulling you apart instead of drawing you closer, this episode will remind you of God’s truth, give you tools for calm connection, and bring hope that what feels like a setback can actually become the setup for deeper trust.

What You’ll Learn:

• Why counseling can sometimes make your partner feel more distant instead of closer.
• What to do when fear, frustration, and powerlessness creep into your relationship.
• How to respond with faith and connection instead of panic and defensiveness.

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