Life With Herpes

133 - You Can Have Herpes & Intimacy With Your Partner


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Ok on this episode my husband, Bill, joins me to talk about our relationship, sex life, and intimacy.

Bill shares his point of view about being intimate with me and how it’s not really a big deal at all. The only time me having herpes comes up in our intimate relationship is when I have an outbreak. It’s so easy to crawl into a hole and pretend like you don't have an outbreak or get super angry and mad at the world. This helps nobody. It doesn’t help you it doesn’t help your partner and it doesn’t help your sexual relationship.

We handle it by having a conversation about it. That’s it. I just let Bill know that I either feel like one’s coming on or I have one or sometimes I don’t know what’s going on. But the point is I let him know what’s up.

Bill share’s how it’s no big deal at all and there are ways that we get creative if there is the physical need. Because let’s face it...sometimes there are needs. Right?!

Just because it’s not “traditional” sex doesn’t mean that it’s not sex or doesn’t mean it’s not intimate. So get that thought out of your mind.

Then Bill and I go on to share a concept when it comes to sex. Ok so hear me out… Sex is like a sneeze!!!

I know you’re going what???!!!

So when you think about it sex is about 20 minutes. Right? Give or take a bit but in all seriousness, on average it's about 20 minutes. Well, that’s like a sneeze!!! Everything else is intimacy. Everything else is the sexy part. So that means it’s the look, its the touch, its the fun life things you do together. It’s flirting, it’s putting on some sexy lingerie, cooking together or whatever it is. That's the real intimacy part!!! All that stuff is foreplay!!!

So get it out of your head that sex is just the verb. There’s so much more to sex than the act. Intimacy is fun!!!

Bill share’s a story about how I tease him by putting on my little sexy outfit...you’ll have to watch or listen to hear his story.

I then go into talking about how having herpes it doesn’t make me feel less sexy, less desirable, less like a woman. It doesn’t have an effect on our marriage or our sex life.

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Oh yea, remember to subscribe to the Life With Herpes newsletter and get The 5 things  I wished she knew before I was diagnosed with herpes sent directly to your inbox + weekly updates.

 

Xoxo,

Alexandra



Just in case…

Learn about the Herpes Outbreak Toolkit:

Need to talk confidentially about herpes?

Oh Yea and in case you need Herpes Outbreak Essentials

 

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Life With HerpesBy Alexandra Harbushka

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