Navigating Miscommunication and Misunderstanding

Jen helps me process through a communication blip I had with my son. My husband & I have very different styles when talking to our boys, & I felt inadequate, and I sometimes struggle to attune. We talk about context when communicating, projection, who is a safe person to get angry at, & I talk about my own reactivity and confusion at my reaction. Jen reminds me that my family sticks with hard conversations. We also talk about having neuro-normative standards, & how that constantly leads to disappointment.

CO-HOST

Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC

HIGHLIGHTS

Summary

In this conversation, Patricia and Jen discuss their experiences with burnout and the importance of leaning into rest. They explore the challenges of pushing boundaries, asking for what you want, and allowing others to say no. They also discuss the impact of neuro-normative standards and the power of dropping expectations and starting from zero. The conversation delves into the dynamics of communication within families and the difficulties of attuning to different perspectives. They emphasize the importance of staying connected and working through bumps in relationships, while also acknowledging the need for space and the reality of being imperfect humans. The conversation concludes with a reminder to have grace and humility in relationships and to express love and appreciation for one another.

Takeaways

Leaning into rest and embracing the new norm during burnout can be a powerful tool for recovery.

Recognizing and respecting boundaries, both for oneself and others, is essential for maintaining healthy relationships.

Challenging neuro-normative standards and embracing individual differences can lead to greater understanding and acceptance.

Taking space and allowing for imperfection in relationships can foster growth, connection, and grace.

Additional points discussed:

1. Challenges in attuning to one's child compared to a spouse.
2. Contextual factors influencing communication breakdowns.
3. Impact of burnout on family dynamics.
4. Struggles of young adults balancing independence and parental support.
5. Importance of preparation in family communication.
6. Patterns of miscommunication and receptivity.
7. Emotional release and support in times of conflict.
8. Feeling disempowered in communication dynamics.
9. Need for open dialogue and understanding in relationships.
10. Misinterpretation of messages leading to conflict.
11. Defensive reactions in communication breakdowns.
12. Family dynamics during conflict resolution.
13. Neurodivergence and emotional dysregulation.
14. Rupture and repair work in relationships.
15. Acceptance of human imperfections in communication.
16. Parenting challenges and self-awareness.
17. Generational differences in perspectives on communication.
18. Emotional availability and its impact on relationships.
19. Perfectionism and its hindrance to authentic communication.
20. Importance of self-care and emotional readiness in conflict resolution.

Chapters (please adjust time for addition of introduction)

00:00 Introduction and Checking In

00:48 Coming Out of Burnout and Leaning Into Rest

02:06 Pushing Boundaries and Asking for What You Want

03:27 Navigating Setbacks and Embracing Patience

04:02 Valuing Autonomy and Allowing Others to Say No

05:22 Challenging Neuro-Normative Standards

06:05 Dropping Expectations and Starting from Zero

07:19 Powering Down and Restoring the Brain

08:26 Communication Challenges with Children

09:17 Recognizing Different Perspectives and Values

11:21 Navigating Family Dynamics and Emotional Activation

14:10 Miscommunication and Misunderstandings

15:41 The Impact of Words and Different Perspectives

18:08 Feeling Inadequate and Wounded

19:20 Staying Connected and Working Through Bumps

22:24 Empathic Communication and Paving the Way

25:01 Taking Space and Being Imperfect Humans

26:27 Staying in Relationship Through Messiness

30:20 Having Grace and Humility in Relationships

32:01 Accepting Imperfection and Being Present

35:15 Wrapping Up and Expressing Love

PODCAST HOST

Patricia was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller. Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion. She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges. Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you

CO-HOST BIO

Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC has been a psychotherapist for 20 years. She specializes in helping Highly Sensitive People thrive in love, work, and parenting Highly Sensitive Children. Jen is passionate about using mindfulness and compassion-based approaches to ameliorate human suffering.

LINKS

Jen's Links

Email: [email protected]

Jen's website: https://heartfulnessconsulting.com/

Patricia's Links

Neurodivergent Online Course-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/neurodivergent-online-courses/

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Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com