I should be clear... I don't struggle with this. The stories I share about my pride in this episode are a complete rarity. Almost never happens. ​I also don't struggle with lying... :D (Just kidding :) I need this learning as much as anyone... which is why I'm excited to share what God is teaching me!

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"My spouse needs to change..."

"[He is / She is] doing so many bad things...so many..."

"There's nothing I can do unless [he / she] changes..."

I knew this was a disempowering mindset that I saw often.

But it wasn't until this week when God confronted me with my pride, that I learned that "self-pity" is the sin of pride.

Ouch.

But true.

(I learned this through the book by R. T. Kendall's The Power of Humility. I highly recommend it.)

Wallowing in your pain isn't God's way.

"But I don't deserve to be treated like this!"

I hear you.

Job didn't deserve his suffering either.

His suffering was profound.

Maybe yours is too.

Job started out strong. Even when others encouraged him to deny God's goodness, he stayed faithful to God and honored His faithfulness regardless.

But eventually, he succumbed to self-pity, he was severely corrected for his wallowing in self-pity.

I hope you and I will heed what God said to Job. And that we would respond the way Job did to His correction.

I encourage you to lean into His discipline.

He is a good Father who disciplines His children.

God is kind to bring us to repentance.

And don't worry... I needed this episode too. Let's draw near to God. Lay down our pride and acknowledge and seek Him as Lord and King.

Love, Belah

PS - We'd love to help you with your marriage, go to delightyourmarriage.com/cc for a free Clarity Call.

PPS - If you're wondering how healthy your marriage is right now to give you insights on what needs to change and the first steps in how to with free resources... go to delightyourmarriage.com/health to take the Marital Health Assessment.

From another recent graduate: Before the men's program: "Struggles - Arguing, lack of trust, loss of peace frequently, little laughter, lack of joy, lack of fun. I was worried that if I didn't change, my wife might leave me after the kids leave for college.

After:"Getting compliments and thanks from my wife (I would get them so so rarely). My wife hugging and kissing me and being playful. Holding hands and walking together when outside in public. Peace at home, laughter between us and with kids. We are in love again." Final thoughts: "It's the best life changing thing that happened to me. Its changed my view about my wife, about women, it helped me change to understand my wife and women better, helped with my relationship with my kids, my mother and sister. My relationship with my mom and sis was very bad, it's improving now. Trying to use the CIRQUE, No arguments, gratefulness, compliments at work and other relationships. It's worth a million bucks!!!!" Glory to God! We'd love to help you too! Find out more on a free Clarity Call: http://delightyourmarriage.com/cc