I Have Said It 700 Times! I Can't Say It Anymore!

Episode #398 with Jenni Poulos

Your team members’ success is your success. So, how do you ensure they succeed? One way is by communicating clearly, and Kirk Behrendt brings back Jenni Poulos to share expert advice on having clarity with your team. If you're tired of not having your expectations met, and you're tired of repeating yourself, remember one thing: before you point the finger, turn your thumb! To grow as a leader so you can help your team be successful, listen to 398 of The Best Practices Show!

Main Takeaways:

Clarity is usually the issue, not the team member.

Overcommunicate your expectations.

Don't do drive-by communication and expect results.

Always ask the three clarifying questions.

Listen to understand. Don't listen with an agenda.

Quotes:

“The real issue here is clarity. I have had this thought process myself as a leader and a manager 700 times, and I talk about this every day with coaching clients, ‘Why aren’t they doing it? Why isn't it happening? I thought we agreed to this.’ There's usually one common denominator, and it’s rarely the team member.” (4:24—4:52)

“When I want something to be executed, when I need something to be done, when I need expectations and reality to be in alignment, I have to overcommunicate so clearly what my expectation is, what I want to be done, how I want it to be done, so that the team member can move forward confidently. We fail to ask people if they understand what our expectation is of them, and this is a big gap.” (6:19—6:55)

“When we are coming to an agreement, or when I am asking something of someone, I don't want drive-by communication. I run by someone at five million miles an hour and I tell them that I want something done, and I just expect it to be done, and they maybe heard five percent of what I've said. So, whose fault is that? It’s not their fault. So, I'm going to slow down, ‘Sally, I need you to do X, Y, and Z. Are you good with that? What did you hear? Do you have what you need? When is it going to be done?’” (6:56—7:38)

“I always am going to ask these clarifying questions when I'm communicating with someone. I want to know, ‘Did you hear clearly?’ I want to make sure that I was clear in my communication. So, ‘What did you hear? Do you have what you need to do this? Do you have what you need to be successful?’ You will learn so much from this question across all levels of communication with your team. And then, ‘When are you going to do it?’ Tie it to a time. That's how we get things done. That's how we build habits.” (7:52—8:35)

“I love to tell all of my team members, ‘Listen, your success is my success. So, it only serves both of us to have this open, honest communication and for you to tell me, hey, I'm not clear on this. I didn't understand.’ Because if they're not successful at their job, I'm not going to be successful at mine.” (10:32—10:54)

“Before you point the finger, turn the thumb.” (17:58—18:02)

“When you are communicating with team members, trying to figure out what's going on, when they are talking to you or telling you what's happening, please listen to them. Because if there is an actual instance in which they need more learning or they don't understand and you're not actually listening, you're not going to work through that.” (19:20—19:42)

“Listen to hear, not to respond. Listen for understanding. You will learn by listening to [your team members]. So, please; it is a very important piece of this. When you ask a question, you need to actually listen to the answer.” (19:46—20:04)

“We always want to look externally at what the issue is. It’s always the team members “not getting it.” It’s always something with someone else. Because the hard learning, the hard thing is looking at yourself and...