Mom and Mind

449: Behind the Sessions: 2 am Pep Talk, Part 3: Middle-of-the-Night Self-Care


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In Part 1 of this series, we discussed how heavy and burdensome things can feel in the middle of the night when you are alone with your baby, struggling to function and feeling exhausted. 

In Part 2, we ventured into what it’s like when anxiety and intrusive thoughts pop up in the middle of the night. Today’s focus is on the importance of taking care of YOU, even in the middle of the night. You could feel “touched out” and overwhelmed, forgetting that you need self-care, too. You need to actively and intentionally have a plan. Let’s explore this topic further!


Show Highlights:

  • Your options in the middle of the night may be limited. 

  • Think ahead and plan for water/snacks while taking care of the baby. Have them available nearby.

  • Consider your personal comfort: blankets, socks, a sweater, or a small fan

  • Plan for other options for music/noise besides doom-scrolling on your phone.

  • After tending to the baby's needs, do some gentle stretches to help your neck, shoulders, and arms relax and release tension.

  • “Are there small do-able things I can do to inject a little more self-care and attention into that hour or so in the middle of the night?”

  • The magic in a slow, deep breath in and out to regulate your nervous system

  • Feeling physically tired and “wired” at the same time

  • Self-care is NOT selfish!

  • Enlist your partner to help—before bedtime. (Dr. Kat shares tips about asking for help in the right way.)

  • If you have that feeling of dread about the middle of the night, find one thing that brings you comfort and calm; add it into your middle-of-the-night practice.

  • Consider using affirmations and meditation for grounding and self-compassion.

  • Give yourself the same kindness that you would give to a friend. 

    Resources:

    Call the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-TLC-MAMA or visitcdph.ca.gov.

    Please find resources in English and Spanish at Postpartum Support International, or by phone/text at 1-800-944-4773. 

    There are many free resources, like online support groups, peer mentors, a specialist provider directory, and perinatal mental health training for therapists, physicians, nurses, doulas, and anyone who wants to be more supportive in offering services.

    You can also follow PSI on social media, including Instagram, Facebook, and other platforms.

    Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/for information on the grief course. 

    Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today! 

    If you are a California resident seeking a therapist in perinatal mental health, please email me about openings for private pay clients. 


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    Mom and MindBy Katayune Kaeni, Psy.D., PMH-C

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