Real Recovery Talk

501: Loopholes, Reservations, and Unrealistic Expectations: Why They Lead to Relapse


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In this episode, we dive into the subtle but dangerous ways people sabotage their recovery by trying to find loopholes—justifying behaviors, bending the rules, or searching for “safe” ways to still get high without calling it a relapse.

We talk about what it looks like when someone isn’t truly solid in their sobriety, and how setting unrealistic expectations for themselves—like needing to be perfectly healed or have everything figured out—can set them up for disappointment and, ultimately, relapse.

We also discuss the topic of hidden reservations—those quiet little “what ifs” in the back of someone’s mind. “If it gets too hard, I can always use.” Often, these reservations aren’t obvious to the people around them, but they’re dangerous and real.

Finally, we break down why it’s so important to build a strong foundation in early sobriety, and how having a clear reason—and desire—to stay sober is what truly makes the difference. If you’ve ever struggled with being half-in or noticed someone you care about slipping without fully falling, this episode is for you.

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Real Recovery TalkBy Tom, Ben, and Dr. Tambini

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