Blended Family Breakthrough

61. How to Partner Well as a Stepparent — Even if You Feel Stuck on the Outside (Part 1)


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Stepparents, you want to be a part of the team — in your marriage and in your family.

But it can often feel like you're stuck on the outside of the "allegiance" that's formed between your spouse and his or her kids.

That's when the frustration, hurt or anger sets in and you end up in the danger zone of allowing "easy wrong turns" to dictate your attitude.  It's these easy wrong turns that actually rob you of the teamwork and unity you're actually looking for.

And there are some simple things you can do to positively influence that parent-child allegiance happening between your spouse and their kids.  And each one starts with making sure your mindset is in the right place.

I (Mike) know how hard this can be, and over time, I discovered that my mindset and attitude was keeping me stuck.  And when I tweaked my perspectives just a little bit, I started showing up better and Kim actually started to respond to me differently.

If you can relate to any of this, I can't wait for you to join us for the next couple of episodes!  Why?  Because we're going to share the most critical shifts I had to make in my mindset over the years — and we've seen these same mindset shifts help the stepparents we've coached to experience the teamwork they've been looking for all along.

Don't wait — let's dive into the episode…

You'll Discover:

  • How unrealistic expectations can force your partner into feeling like they have to choose between you and their kids
  • The difference between labeling behavior and labeling character — and why getting it wrong leaves you feeling hopeless
  • How easy it is for stepparents to jump into an authoritarian parenting-style and why it doesn’t work

Resources from this Episode:

  • Episode 26:  Are You Stuck in a "Competition" with Your Step Kids?
  • Episode 21:  What is the Stranded Stranger & Trapped Teammate Experience?
  • Blog:  What's the Best Way to Blend and Build Family Bonds
  • Episode 40:  Uncover the Unspoken Feelings of Kids in Blended Families
  • Episode 37:  Why do Kids Struggle to Accept their Stepparent?
  • Episode 4:  Can You Overcome Your Parenting Style Differences?
  • Blog:  How to Parent as a Team and Steer Clear of Power Struggles

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Now if you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)

Want to Support the Show?

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Blended Family BreakthroughBy Mike & Kim Anderson

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