Pamela Anderson was everywhere in the 90s, as a sex symbol and an object of ridicule. And none of her projects is more forgotten than V.I.P., the show where she bumbles into starting a bodyguard agency for the stars. And now, you, can fulfill your lifelong dream of playing a barely interactive video game adaptation of her adventures!

Support Abject Suffering

If you go anywhere used games are sold, you’ll see shelves choked with DS and Wii shovelware. And this week’s game, Wonder World Amusement Park, is emblematic of everything about that phenomenon. But of course, Gary picked this game to have an excuse to talk about his trip to the Oregon State Fair, which featured a real life reenactment of The Zoo Race.

Support Abject Suffering

Gonna be honest, it’s weird to record an episode that stays on topic like this one does. Everyone remembers the Eternal Champions, right? A franchise beloved enough that it got two character-specific spinoffs before Mortal Kombat got even one? X-Perts (unrelated to the X-Men) is in the running for one of the worst beat-em-ups we’ve covered for the show, which is really saying something.

Support Abject Suffering

Behold, the Nega-Bear. It exists within and without our dimension. Do not try to shut your eyes, as the Nega-Bear moves faster when it is not perceived.

Support Abject Suffering

I hate to say, but sometimes you just have to respect somebody with that many muscles.

Support Abject Suffering

Now to play a nice relaxing game where cops beat up... the incarcerated. Hmm.

Support Abject Suffering

Here is a list of your sins: You never used that coupon. Your wallet smells funny. You don't clean your phone.

Support Abject Suffering

Well, I don't see why the devs had to make it sexual.

Support Abject Suffering

I... I'm told this is a fashion game, somehow?

Support Abject Suffering

Spies! Snowboarding! Uh... yeah, we don't get it either.

Support Abject Suffering