Aging & Raging

Guys stay with us! This week we are talking about teeth. When it comes to brushing our kids teeth it seems like there are only two options: abuse or neglect. When it comes to our own teeth it seems like there’s only one option: dentures. because we just can’t make it to our regular checkups anymore. Wtf why are teeth so hard.

Hi mamas!!! We got a treat for you! This week is a very special episode : Ali’s tells the story of her first son’s Hawaiian home birth. It’s a beautiful and fascinating story involving long walks, Vince Vaughn movies, wet cats and you guessed it...coconut oil.

Hi Mamas!!! We are back from spring break!!! We went to Senor Frogs, won a wet shirt contest and got some sick new tats. Kidding we hosed our kids off in the yard and did all the screen time and we’re so glad it’s over because we missed you!! This week we answer your burning questions with...more questions. And Chriddys fail redefines the phrase, “Stoney silence.”

Yes, yes it’s wonderful when they first sleep through the night, try solids for the first time, babble mama or take those first wobbly steps. But get real: what are the milestones that really rock your world and make motherhood that much easier? We’re talking using the remote , putting on their shoes, and the holy grail of milestones : wiping their own asses. Plus kate’s epic fail as a helicopter mom on steroids.

Hey mamas, what kind of birth control are you using? The pill? An IUD? Your baby's screams and your building resentment of your partner? We've tried them all! This week we chat about what's worked for us in the past and what we're relying on now. Plus someone let their kid walk around Disney with no shoes and get sick. GUESS WHO? Rhymes with Dolly.

Ok kids, you want the truth?!? Your artwork sucks, your bedtime story is annoying, if you don’t eat your dinner you won’t actually shrink until you disappear, Santa ain’t real, ditto the Tooth Fairy. Mommy’s phone has plenty of battery but you still can’t watch it, the park is open, but we ain’t going. You need to wear your coat bc I care more about what strangers think of my parenting than your personal preferences, the condom broke, ETC. ETC. See, children? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!! And neither can we, which is why we fib to our kids alll day long. Listen up as we tell the truth about all our lies. UGH!

When I have kids, I’m gonna feed them organic food, read to them every day, make sure they get plenty of creative stimulation and...slam the door in my husbands face, yell at him at the top of my lungs, go passive aggressively silent, exchange nasty texts, and terrorize the kids with our screaming matches SAID NO MOTHER EVER. And yet. Couples fight. And couples with kids have more to fight about than ever bc this shit is STRESSFUL. This week we are coming clean about fighting in front of kids. Our fuckups and our efforts to improve. But plz let the record reflect: he started it.

Guys! What Should I Do? (2nd Edition) :
Surprise! The real moms of Nursing & Cursing don’t know what the eff they’re doing! 👍😃 This week, join us for another round robin discussion and weigh in on some parenting dilemmas we’re having: From the life changing magic of Daniel Tiger, to overnight diaps... Not to spoil it, but “Dig deeper, this too shall pass” will most likely solve all of them.

V-Day Special! Who let the Dads out?!!? WHOOP WHOOP (its a dad joke, get it?) This week we have some verrrryyy special guests: OUR HUSBANDS! Join us as we discuss what they miss about their pre-baby lives n wives and we ask them the hard hitting questions like: wtf even is wrong with you?!?!?  Listen as they come clean with their #nails and #fails. Leave a comment and let us know if we should ask for joint custody for Valentine's Day. omg KIDDING!

Extracurriculars, enrichment activities, after school. Whatever you call it, it equals more time and more money. And more signing them up and more dropping them off and more picking them back up and more more MORE. So why do we do it, why do we do music classes and gymnastics and swimming and soccer and a bunch of other extra shit? Is it mom guilt, pressure to keep up, or is it possible one of us is raising the next musical prodigy and just one more piano lesson  and his talent will be obvious?!? Plus Molly’s got another gross or fail. DUH.