Friendship IRL: Real Talk About Friendship, Community, and What It Actually Takes

Are Low-Maintenance Friendships Actually Low Maintenance? (Plus, Tips on How to Make Them Work Better For You!)


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Are low-maintenance friendships all they’re made out to be?

So many of us are trying to live in this impossible zone of wanting friendship to be little effort but not neglectful. The effort of staying in this bubble can make maintaining a friendship more difficult, and it also denies many of our inherent needs.

Today I’m going to talk about why this mainstream current definition of “low maintenance” friendship is not serving us. How can we think about low maintenance friendship differently and make it work for us?

Friendship should be a reprieve, not a burden; let’s make it easier on ourselves by focusing on consistent, simple connections. Think breadcrumbs, not bread loaves.


In this episode you’ll hear about:

  • The language we use about “low-maintenance” friendship and the fine line that defines them – you want “low attention” but can’t be neglectful
  • How so much of low-maintenance friendships is denying that we matter, that we want to be seen, that we have needs
  • The amount of energy we spend staying in the exact right zone of a low maintenance friendship – which in the end isn’t very low maintenance!
  • The importance of having conversations about how we each are able to show up in friendships
  • How to leave “breadcrumbs” instead of bread loaves through scheduling hacks, reoccurring meet-ups/texts/calls, voice messages, etc.


Resources & Links:

Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!

Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!


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Friendship IRL: Real Talk About Friendship, Community, and What It Actually TakesBy Alex Alexander

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