Attuned

Recently a spur of existential questions & doubt led me to thinking about expectations - the internal ones we place on ourselves and the external ones that others place on us. In this episode I unpack and discuss how a) expectations can get a bad rep but they're not inherently bad,  b) the theory of The Four Tendencies which is about how we all respond to expectations differently,  and c) that the internal and external expectations we have of ourselves and other people change and shift as we grow and evolve, but sometimes not at the same time. None of us operate in a vacuum, we exist in relationship with other people. So expectations can be messy and are far from black & white. Hopefully this episode gives you some insight into how you respond to expectations and filter through what's pushing you forward and what's holding you back. 

Episode references:
The Four Tendencies Quiz & Info

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@attunedpodcast

In a continuation of last weeks episode I deep dive into why tuning into your unique energy and rest cycle is super important and can help you do the following: 

1. Stop comparing yourself to other people and their levels of productivity
2. Work with your energy instead of against it
3. Unravel your worth from your productivity
4. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself

I break down each of the points and use tangible examples to explain how to do this for yourself. Doing less does not mean you are less, and doing more does not mean you are more, so honor your energy cycle and trust that everything you want to do and achieve will happen the way it's supposed to the more attuned you are to yourself. xx

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@attunedpodcast

The past few months I've been doing, creating, socializing and putting out new projects back to back. On one hand it's been exciting and exhilarating, but on the other hand I'm tired af. And I don't think I'm the only one feeling that. Especially with so many covid restrictions lifting now and life being mostly "back to normal" we are all doing so much more than we've done in the past two years. Some of it is necessary because of external expectations we have to meet, and a lot of it is unnecessary and self-imposed. In this episode I talk about tuning into your unique energy cycle so you can work with it instead of against it, taking the pressure off yourself in real ways, and pouring back into your own cup by surrounding yourself with people and environments where you feel safe and contained. xx

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@attunedpodcast

Don't let your fear of looking cringey and lame get in the way of doing the things you really want to do. Don't let other peoples  opinions rob you of the life experiences you are supposed to have. You deserve to do what's on your heart no matter how it may be perceived. xx


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@attunedpodcast

Hey guys, coming to you again after a little hiatus, with one last episode to cap off Season 1. I recorded this episode on March 21, 2022 which is exactly one year from the day I had my "meltdown that changed my career path" - the title of the very first episode where I tell the story of what happened when I made the decision to walk away from my seven year design career. It felt significant to sit down and reflect on where I'm at exactly one year later and how much my life has changed, how much I have changed since then. I feel like a different person and more aligned and in tune with myself than I ever have been before. I also talk about two mantras that I always go back to especially when I'm in a period of transition - "you don't have to know the how" and "your whole life can change in a year." We really can't predict the future, all we can do is know ourselves and follow wherever it takes us, even if it's totally and completely unexpected. xx

References...
Lil Nas X Video 

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@attunedpodcast

"Doing the work" or doing anything as vulnerable as prioritizing your mental health and healing can get muddy sometimes. It's easy to  get lost in the process and discouraged by things we read, see or hear. That happened to me last week and in response, I found myself writing a list in my phone notes of things to remind myself while going through this process. I wanted to share those ten things today (and one bonus at the end) in the hopes that they might be reminders that other people need to hear too.

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@attunedpodcast

Today we’re talking about one of my favorite topics, the Subconscious Mind. I have an amazing guest on, Katrina Ramos, who is a certified Hypno therapist, expert on the subconscious and has gone through her own really profound transformation from self sabotaging throughout her 20’s, to loosing her dad at the beginning of the pandemic, to now being in a place of peace, deep worthiness and real genuine love and compassion for herself. You can hear it in her voice as she speaks and it was really inspiring to me. 

Throughout the episode she helps me dive into the subconscious and educate us on what it is, how its different than our other brain states and why it’s so so powerful for healing. Our conversation is super educational but at the same time, as we always do on this podcast we share real life examples and stories of our own problematic behavior patterns and how we worked on healing them by tapping into our subconscious minds. She sheds so much light on all of this in ways that I could never articulate on my own. 

She also walks us through what she does as a Hypno therapist and how hypnosis is one of the best ways to use our subconscious and facilitate deep healing work at the root. She describes what she does in her sessions and the transformations she’s seen her clients go through. I even had a session with her myself a few weeks ago, which was amazing. 

I truly believe that our subconscious holds the key to healing emotional wounds we might not even know we have. Sometimes you might wonder “why it’s so hard, almost impossible to love myself, believe in myself, do the things that I really want to do, find my people, find my person?" the list goes on. Most of the time, when things aren’t aligning for us because there’s deep shit, blocks in our subconscious that we aren’t aware of - or we are aware of but don’t know how to heal them. This episode will hopefully give you some answers and it will definitely give you some insight. I love our conversation and I hope you guys enjoy. 

Katrina's info...
Work with her at Healing Hypnosis
Follow her at @healinghypno.space

Resources...
To Be Magnetic Manifestation Workshop

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@alexandrascadiz
@attunedpodcast

Today I’m sharing a talk I gave recently for an organization called Cultured Kids Cuisine who have a series on Empowering Women Entrepreneurs. It’s founded by young women of color who are carving out their own space in the world and their mission is to build cultural awareness and empathy among young kids through cooking events and workshops. They also offer networking and career-building resources to girls and women including this speaking series. When they reached out to me a few months ago to invite me to be one of their speakers, they said I could pick any topic for my talk. I asked them what it was about me that made them reach out and they said it was the fact that I did so many things. This was surprising and also validating to me because one of my big fears with being so multifaceted is that I’ll confuse people and scare them away. But my multiplicity was exactly what drew them to me. So I decided to make my talk about the topic you guys know I love most - embracing your multidimensional self.

This episode is in two parts, the first part is my talk and the second part is a Q&A. In the Q&A I answer amazing questions from the girls about architecture & interior design, business & entrepreneurship, navigating my cultural identity, taking care of myself and tools I use to tap into my authentic self & get to know myself deeper. They also ask about what I do to take care of myself, how I use journaling as a self help tool, my take on “networking”, the importance of friendships and having people in your life who see you and support you, learning about myself by getting knocked down so many times, and much more. 

This was all on Zoom so the quality isn’t the best but bear with me because I know there’s some gems in here and I just loved getting to connect with these young women and share my story. 

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Resources mentioned...
The Five Minute Journal
We're Not Really Stangers Game
Autocad
Sketchup
Headspace

Today we’re having a conversation about body image. My guest is Finley Trocmé, a friend of mine and an advocate. She has been through so much with her body, her mental health, and societal pressures and expectations around her body. She used to be a trainer at Equinox, has battled an eating disorder, body dysmorphia, sexual assault and so much more. But has now gotten to a place in her late 20’s where she’s reframed the way she sees herself and built a super strong foundation of confidence and self love that she uses every day to reinforce that new narrative. 

Whether you’ve also experienced some of those things, or haven’t at all, this conversation is so relatable. We talk about having agency over your body, and a deep connection to self, but how that be really difficult in our patriarchal society and takes a lot of intention and unlearning. We talk about body image in relationship to ethnicity and culture, and our bodies in relationship to our essence and spirit. We go into specifics and share anecdotes from every day life that I’m sure most of you will find very familiar. Finley is so knowledgeable and drops some facts that I never knew of before, so there’s just a lot of good information in this episode too. 

I do want to say that we are two straight white/half white women having this conversation so we don’t intend to represent everyone who’s ever struggled with body image, we’re just sharing our own stories in the hopes that you’ll be able to connect. It’s a long one but I promise it’s worth it and I hope you take something meaningful away from our conversation. 

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Connect with Finley at...
https://www.instagram.com/infinniet/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/finleytrocme/

Healing and liberating ourselves go hand in hand. Most people walk through the world unknowingly ruled by their subconscious, playing out the same damaging patterns over and over, and constantly projecting onto other people. We can't be free until we break our patterns and let go of external expectations, and we can't break our patterns and let go of external expectations until we heal our deeper wounds. 

To me, freedom is a clear path to do what I want when I want, a deep knowing that I can be exactly who I am and the world will accept me. It's giving myself permission to feel joy, fun & pleasure as well as sadness, hurt and anger. It's allowing myself to be messy and rough around the edges, to not have everything figured out. These are all things that I rarely allowed myself to do before, because I was so busy upholding a version of myself that I thought I needed to be to be loved & accepted- the good daughter, sister, friend. The girl who always has her shit together and never lets anything fall through the cracks. But I'm human. And I am messy, complicated, multifaceted, contradictory, and that's ok. 

In this solo episode I break down why freeing ourselves from external expectations is necessary for reaching our full potential and becoming our most magnetic selves. I list five strategies for taking inventory of where you might be holding yourself back in different parts of your life, and use my own experiences to explain. I also share three questions that I ask myself when I'm trying to figure out where I need to loosen control and free myself a little more. This episode will help you do that for yourself, and reflect on the places where you're feeling stuck or keeping yourself small. When you liberate yourself, you free others too, and it's a beautiful ripple effect. 


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Things referenced in the episode...
TBM Manifestation workshop: https://tobemagnetic.com/
Untamed book by Glennon Doyle: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07Z44CWFM/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_2XTQ55WHX0AM8BW44FYC