SuperPsyched with Dr. Adam Dorsay

#158 Big Talk: The Antidote for Small Talk | Kalina Silverman


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Have you ever left a social event and, after talking all night to various people, felt like nothing real was said? Sure, if a transcriptionist followed you, there was lots of dialogue. But as you considered the meaning of the dialogue, it felt empty.

This would not be problematic if we humans didn’t chase meaning throughout our lives. As SuperPsyched guest, mythologist, Michael, Meade says, “We are not just Homo sapiens, we are homo symbolicus,” which I think is a super cool way of saying that we are creatures who need meaning in life.

Unfortunately, most schools don’t teach us how to engage in meaningful conversation. Instead, most of us go through life engaging in small talk, and not knowing how to connect with others about things that really matter to us. And because we are social creatures, much of how we learn about who we are, ourselves, occurs in a space of conversation. So not only does that keep us from knowing others, it keeps us from knowing ourselves more deeply.Doing this takes vulnerability and courage but the payoff is huge.

I’m so grateful my guest, Kalina Silverman (https://www.makebigtalk.com/), started on what was meant to be a two-year journey to help us with the skill of Big Talk. She’s now in her eighth year and she doesn’t appear to be stopping anytime soon because there’s such a need for it. Being a fan of Kalina’s work is definitely not a lonely experience. Her TEDx talk has garnered over 6 million views and her Big Talk cards that facilitate good questions, sell in large volumes. Her work has been incorporated into large corporations, the military, schools, and even jails to improve the quality of life of the stakeholders there. Clearly, Kalina and Big Talk has struck a chord with what people are wanting and needing.

And, please note, she is not speaking out against small talk. You’ll hear in our conversation that small talk has a place in our lives. But you’ll also hear that when it’s our only move, we miss out on so much.

So, listen in as Kalina and I talk about Big Talk: why we need it and how to do it.

To Purchase Big Talk Cards: https://tinyurl.com/2s448997

Kalina’s Website: http://www.kalinasilverman.com/


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