ADHD has been well understood in the classroom. For a long time, ADHD has been well understood in children and treated for optimal growth in their maturing years. What about adults? What does ADHD look like later in life? How should we understand its effect on life and relationships? How do we treat the disorder for optimal living in the mature years? 

Show notes: 

What is ADHD? 

• ADHD stands for Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorder. It is a brain disorder. Individuals with ADHD might find it difficult to focus, stay on task, calm and quiet themselves. 

What is the neuroscience behind ADHD? 

• ADHD is a delay in brain development. When certain neurotransmitters are unable to be balanced in the brain, ADHD will result. Two significant neurotransmitters out of balance in the ADHD brain are dopamine and norepinephrine. Dopamine promotes focus, motivation and reward. Norepinephrine regulates judgement and control. 

When does ADHD show up? 

• When ADHD is present, it will show up in childhood. However, the disorder does persist into adulthood. How ADHD is manifested through the aging process differs. For example, hyperactivity which manifests itself outward in youth is still present in an adult but is often experienced more inwardly. ADHD adults have an advantage over ADHD children because they have more control over their environment. For example, the classroom is imposed on the life of a child but a career conducive to an ADHD adult is within their control. 

How is ADHD diagnosed? 

• ADHD can be diagnosed at any point in a person’s life. Two methods for diagnosis are available: 

• A clinical diagnosis happens when a professional evaluates the presence of the disorder by interview. Through a holistic battery of questions to the client as well as those who live and work closely with them an ADHD determination can be given.  

• A neuro-psychological evaluation can be given by a professional. This approach includes cognitive skills assessments. 

• It is important to note that before “ruling in” ADHD, many things need to be “ruled out.” There are many confounding matters such as anxiety and depression that conflate the ADHD diagnosis.  

If someone suspects ADHD, should they get a diagnosis? 

• Yes and no. 

• Knowing what is contributing to pain is helpful in working through and finding remedies for it. If what an individual suspects to be ADHD is causing ongoing pain in their relationships and responsibilities, a diagnosis has purpose.  

• If very mild ADHD is present but not causing ongoing life disruption and pain, then a diagnosis may not be necessary. 

What are some “helps” for those with ADHD? 

• Two routes can be taken for assisting those with ADHD: 

• Therapy can be helpful in learning good coping, lifestyle management and relationship skills. These skills can help mitigate the pain ADHD can cause. 

• Because ADHD is an imbalance of neurotransmitters, medication is available to help bring balance where imbalance is present. 

Is having ADHD only negative in a person’s life? 

• Fortunately, many have lived well with their ADHD. Their brain is able to take in a lot of stimuli at the same time. Their activated state can produce many benefits such as creativity and ambition. 

The thyroid gland is the master gland of the body. From this command center, hormones are dispatched. Those hormones send marching orders for our bodies to follow. The marching orders orbit closely to those matters that preserve and propagate life. While this bustle of activity happens beneath the boundary of our skin, effects surface in our thoughts and emotions. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Lynne Streitmatter, a professional in women’s hormonal care talks with Kathy Knochel a clinical therapist about the intersection of our bodies with our emotional, relational and spiritual lives.

A lot goes into a thriving marriage. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kaleb Beyer uses the research of Dr. John Gottman to place his finger on the components of a marriage that not only lasts, but flourishes.

View the Sound Relationship House Model here

What is normal? In a world of air brushing and curated content, it can be illusive. Yet, having a good compass toward knowing normal goes a long way toward good mental health. Studies have shown that supernormal stimuli can have a damaging effect on our brains.  In this episode of Breaking Bread, addiction specialist, Jacob Feucht, teaches us what supernormal stimuli are, how to spot them and unwind their influence.  

Show Notes: 

Definition:  

• Supernormal Stimulus – Exaggerated characteristics in normal stimuli.  

Problem:  

• Studies have shown that humans can begin to crave what is not natural or real at the expense of what is natural and real. 

Examples: 

• Diet: We can crave unnatural foods at the expense of natural foods. 

• Attention: We can crave unnatural rapidity of stimuli and addict ourselves to distraction because we resist the “slowness” of reality. 

• Pornography: We crave sexual stimuli and addict ourselves to unnatural characteristics at the expense of healthy biblical sexual relations. 

Healthy living: 

• Seek after, linger in and live in the real world. Learn to love what God created and what He created them for. 

Bullying is as old as the hills. Yet it has gained more thoughtful attention in recent days. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Craig Stickling, a middle school counselor, provides much needed insights into this broken relational posturing between people.

Conflict does not spell doom in the marriage relationship. However, how we do conflict might. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kaleb Beyer shares four behaviors that need to be avoided when “working things out” with your spouse. Kaleb explains what they are and how they can be avoided. 

Show notes: 

• Four negative behaviors that spell trouble for marriages and how they can be avoided. 

• Criticism  

• • Criticism often starts with “You.” “You always...” or “You never...” These statements are personal, labeling and strike at the identity of the other. 

• • To avoid criticism, try using “I” statements. These look inward and communicate your reality and surface the need at hand. “I am disappointed that ...”  

• Defensiveness  

• • Defensiveness often is provoked by criticism and leads to criticism. It denies and shrugs off the need underlying criticism. 

• • To avoid defensiveness, accept the reality of the other. Take responsibility for your part in the conflict.  

• Contempt  

• • Contempt is disdain for the other. An inner dialogue that is continually negative. It can grow out of unrelenting criticism over time. 

• • To avoid contempt, friendship needs to be nurtured and grown. 

• Stonewalling 

• • Stonewalling occurs when the nervous system is so heightened reasoning goes “offline.” Individuals experience a “flooding” of the senses in a way that shuts them down. 

• • To avoid stonewalling, take 20 minutes of body and mental calming.  

Note: These negative behaviors have been highlighted from the research work of Dr. John Gottman. 

Both the secular and the religious tout mindfulness and meditation. It’s no wonder, because they promise a great deal of health to the one who practices them. Does mindfulness and mediation, however, look the same across the secular and religious worldviews? To answer this question, Kaleb Beyer and Isaac Funk speak to both the therapeutic and Christian uses of these practices.  

Show Notes: 

• Mindfulness – attentive to the present moment. 

• Meditation – focused attention. 

• Therapeutically these practices help a person have cognitive flexibility. The freedom to allow more into their experience than the one painful script that is running. In this way, mindfulness and meditation help a person uncouple themselves from mental distress in such a way that allows for a felt reality that is informed by accuracy and truth.  

• Spiritually, in a Christian sense, this uncoupling allows for a recoupling with God. The goal is not a disembodied state nor an abandonment of self. It is not an emptying but a filling. Not defined by absence but by presence. It allows for a life to be lived with God in the body and in the mind. 

Sadness is a universal emotion that touches every life. Life's challenges often bring moments of deep sorrow. As Christians, how can we navigate these feelings while staying anchored in God's promises? Whether you're in the midst of sadness or supporting a loved one through their struggles, this episode offers encouragement as you seek to find God's light in the midst of dark days. 

• Sadness is an uncomfortable emotion that alerts us of a loss.

• Sadness is an important emotion that prompts us to grieve. 

• Grief is the process we walk through to make peace with our loss. 

• Grief is unique to the individual but has a few common elements. 

• • Protest – fighting with the loss. 

• • Despair – mourning the loss. 

• Grief ends with acceptance of the loss.  

• Healthy living includes walking forward with both the loss and the sadness. Alowing these to be a lifegiving present feature in your life.   

Children love to grow. They know it is slow. They know it is for the better. Adults sometimes lose the growth mindset that children have. We forget that growth is for us too. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Isaac Funk and Arlan Miller reinvigorate the growth mindset for the spiritual life. 

• Spiritual Growth – Becoming more like Jesus.
• Growth Mindset – Understanding our responsibility and capability to improve.
• Spiritual Growth Mindset – Understanding our responsibility and capability to improve into more Christlikeness. 

Words said, cannot be unsaid. They remain. When these words come from a place of goodness, this has beautiful consequences. However, when they come from a place of malintent, they can have devastating consequences. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Craig and Jacki Stickling take up the topic of gossip and give us timely warning and instruction.

Show notes: 

Bridling the tongue is a learned skill. It is a matter of deep transformation in our hearts. The mature believer learns how to THINK before they speak: 

• T – speaking Truth. 

• H – using words that are Helpful. 

• I – using speech to Inspire. 

• N – saying those things that are Necessary. 

• K – always being Kind.