Friendship IRL: Real Talk About Friendship, Community, and What It Actually Takes

Breaking Through One-Sided Connections With Chrissy Marie


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Have you ever felt like you’re ALWAYS the one giving a shoulder to cry on – but don’t have one to cry on yourself?

I think it’s a common issue among friends. Personally, I used to brag about how I’d drop everything to help a friend in need – but I eventually discovered it wasn’t sustainable, and my friends didn’t reciprocate in quite the same way.

Today’s guest, Chrissy Marie, experienced similar issues, having always been the “space holder” or “fixer” for other people but never sharing the depths of her own emotions – which consequently led to one-sided connections.

Here, Chrissy – who is also a trauma-informed embodiment practitioner and founder of The Art of Aliveness podcast – shares her journey of unraveling these patterns and offers tips on how to build a diverse support network that holds space for ALL of you – no fixing required.


In this episode you’ll hear about:

  • Chrissy experience being the “space holder” for other people and the watershed moment that cracked her open
  • The fear of losing a friendship if you decide to pull back (and my own personal experience with this)
  • Why, sometimes, being the “fixer” isn’t actually supporting people in the way you think it is
  • The difference between allowing people to know something about you vs. allowing them to see your feelings and emotions about it
  • Fire circles, reparenting the child inside you, a brilliant structure for a Zoom call, and filling the gaps with professional support


Resources & Links:

Be sure to follow Chrissy Marie on her website and listen to her podcast, The Art of Aliveness.

In this episode I mentioned Episode 49 about small talk; Episode 91, about taking charge of your guest experience; Episode 74 about small intimacies; and Episode 85, about shifting people-pleasing patterns.

Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok!

Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!

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Friendship IRL: Real Talk About Friendship, Community, and What It Actually TakesBy Alex Alexander

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