Burnt Pancakes: Momversations | Conversations for Imperfect Moms, Chats About Mom Life & Interviews with Real Mamas

Burnt Pancakes: Momversations | Conversations for Imperfect Moms, Chats About Mom Life & Interviews with Real Mamas

By Katie Fenske - Mom of 3 | Potty Training Coach | Former Teacher | Mama Mentor | Boy Mom | Imperfect Mom | Lover of Mom ChatsHealth & FitnessMental HealthEducationSelf-ImprovementParentingKids & Family
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Burnt Pancakes: Momversations | Conversations for Imperfect Moms, Chats About Mom Life & Interviews with Real Mamas episodes

  • 164. Wait... You Let Him Do WHAT?! How Birth Order Changes Parenting

    Why does your first kid get all the rules while your youngest seems to get away with everything? 😂

    In this episode, I'm talking about birth order and how differently kids can experience the exact same family. Having three boys has made me realize just how different childhood can look depending on where you fall in the birth order.

    Maverick, my youngest, is six and already playing video games, watching shows with his brothers, wearing PSD and Ethika underwear, and throwing around words like "bruh" and "chud." Meanwhile, at the same age, his oldest brother Ronin was wearing Elmo underwear, watching little-kid shows, and I was horrified when he came home from preschool saying "what the heck." 😂

    I talk about:

    •  Why firstborns often get the strictest version of us 
    •  Being the "guinea pig" parent with your oldest 
    •  How parenting changes as we gain experience 
    •  Why younger siblings are exposed to older kids, language, technology, and freedoms much earlier 
    •  Why Maverick's childhood looks NOTHING like Ronin's did at the same age 
    •  How our rules around bikes, technology, independence, and screen time evolve 
    •  Why being treated differently doesn't necessarily mean being loved differently 
    •  The unique experience of being the middle child 
    •  Why middle kids may become adaptable, independent, or learn to find their own identity 
    •  How easy it is for the "easy" child to get overlooked 
    •  Why three kids can grow up in the same house but have completely different childhood experiences 
    •  And the realization that maybe our firstborn wasn't just our first child... they were also the child who taught us how to be parents 

    Because let's be honest: the first kid gets the rule book, the middle kid gets lost in the shuffle, and the youngest gets raised by the other two. 😂

    And somehow, we're all going to turn out okay.

    Listen, laugh, and then tell me...

    Where do you fall in your family, and do you think your birth order affected who you became?

    And if you have multiple kids: Are you parenting your youngest differently than you parented your


    📺 Watch the episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpw5ui4uxJHx0tLFVtpnfSkpObfc4d-K

    You can find Katie at:
    website: burntpancakes.com
    YouTube: @burnt.pancakes
    Instagram: @burntpancakeswithkatie
    Email: [email protected]

    🚽 Did you know Katie is also a Certified Potty Trainer? 🚽

    ☎️ Schedule a 1:1 chat today: Schedule Here
    💻 Digital Potty Training Course HERE
    📖  Potty Training E-Book HERE
    🆓 
    FREE potty training resources HERE
    Instagram: @itspottytime
    Tiktok: @itspottytime_

    Some episodes include affiliate links at no cost to you. 

    32 min
  • 163. Detachment Parenting: How to Stop Trying to Control Your Kids with Anya Jensen

    What if one of the hardest parts of parenting isn’t figuring out how to control our kids’ behavior, emotions, and choices… but learning to let go of that control?

    In this episode, I’m talking with writer and mother Anya Jensen about her philosophy of detachment parenting.

    Anya found herself struggling with the emotional demands of parenting teenagers and the growing tension in her relationship with her daughter. She eventually realized that some of her heartache came from trying to control things that were never actually hers to control.

    We talk about what detachment parenting really means, why moms can feel responsible for their kids’ emotions, and how we can love our children deeply without taking on every emotion, problem, or disappointment they experience.

    And while Anya’s work focuses heavily on teenagers, I think this idea applies to motherhood at every stage: We can support our kids without trying to control them.

    In this episode, we talk about:

    •  What “detachment parenting” actually means 
    •  Why moms feel responsible for their kids’ emotions 
    •  The emotional exhaustion that can come with parenting teenagers 
    •  Learning to accept the limits of our influence 
    •  Parenting our kids without trying to give them the childhood we wish we had 
    •  What detachment can look like in everyday parenting 
    •  Loving our kids without losing ourselves 

    Connect with Anya:
    Tiktok: @detachmentparenting
    Substack: Notes by Anya
    YouTube: Notes by Anya

    The takeaway: Detachment doesn’t mean caring less. Sometimes it means learning to love our kids while letting them have their own feelings, make their own choices, and become their own people.


    📺 Watch the episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpw5ui4uxJHx0tLFVtpnfSkpObfc4d-K

    You can find Katie at:
    website: burntpancakes.com
    YouTube: @burnt.pancakes
    Instagram: @burntpancakeswithkatie
    Email: [email protected]

    🚽 Did you know Katie is also a Certified Potty Trainer? 🚽

    ☎️ Schedule a 1:1 chat today: Schedule Here
    💻 Digital Potty Training Course HERE
    📖  Potty Training E-Book HERE
    🆓 
    FREE potty training resources HERE
    Instagram: @itspottytime
    Tiktok: @itspottytime_

    Some episodes include affiliate links at no cost to you. 

    44 min
  • THROWBACK: Why It's So Hard For Moms to Find and Maintain Friendships with Brenda Ridgley

    This is a Throwback episode from September 2024. I sit down with Brenda Ridgely, an author and podcast host, to discuss reclaiming individuality and fostering deep, meaningful friendships amidst the demands of motherhood and professional life.

    Brenda shares her personal journey through midlife discontent and offers valuable insights on how to overcome the silent epidemic of losing one's sense of self. Together, we explore the importance of genuine connections beyond superficial social media interactions and the challenges of making and maintaining friendships while managing family and career responsibilities.

    Brenda's practical advice on creating empowering friendship circles will help you rediscover your identity and combat loneliness.

    In this conversation, we also delve into the concept of building your personal tribe as adults. Discover the significance of having a core group of close friends, the importance of local connections, and the necessity of stepping out of your comfort zone to meet new people.

    Brenda provides practical tips for transforming casual friendships into deeper, more meaningful connections and emphasizes the value of one-on-one time. Whether you're an introvert or extrovert, busy mom, or career woman, this episode offers strategic advice for fostering connections, rediscovering past interests, and designing your ideal tribe to bring the right people into your life.

    Listen in and find out how to build and nurture empowering female friendships that will support you through all stages of life.

    You can find more about Brenda on her
    Website https://www.brendaridgley.com/
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brendaridgley/
    YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC73PSKAWMaEvXS0SaH7NDaA



    📺 Watch the episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpw5ui4uxJHx0tLFVtpnfSkpObfc4d-K

    You can find Katie at:
    website: burntpancakes.com
    YouTube: @burnt.pancakes
    Instagram: @burntpancakeswithkatie
    Email: [email protected]

    🚽 Did you know Katie is also a Certified Potty Trainer? 🚽

    ☎️ Schedule a 1:1 chat today: Schedule Here
    💻 Digital Potty Training Course HERE
    📖  Potty Training E-Book HERE
    🆓 
    FREE potty training resources HERE
    Instagram: @itspottytime
    Tiktok: @itspottytime_

    Some episodes include affiliate links at no cost to you. 

    35 min
  • 162. What Moms Should Know Before Labor and Delivery with Gina Mundy

    Giving birth is one of the biggest and most unpredictable experiences of motherhood. We spend so much time preparing for the baby, setting up the nursery, buying tiny clothes, and reading about newborn sleep, but how much time do we really spend preparing for labor and delivery?

    In today's episode I sit down with Gina Mundy, a childbirth attorney, bestselling author, speaker, podcaster, and mom of three. Gina has spent more than 23 years analyzing labor and delivery cases to better understand why birth injuries happen and what families can do to become more informed and prepared.

    This conversation isn't about creating fear around childbirth. It's about helping expecting parents understand that preparation can provide knowledge, confidence, and a greater sense of calm when entering the delivery room.

    In this episode, we discuss:

    •  What expecting moms often don't know about labor and delivery until it's too late 
    •  What Gina has learned from more than 23 years of reviewing childbirth cases 
    •  Common patterns surrounding birth injuries and birth trauma 
    •  How to prepare for labor beyond simply creating a birth plan 
    •  Why understanding the labor process can help parents feel calmer and more informed 
    •  How to ask questions and participate in decisions about your care 
    •  Ways moms can advocate for themselves without feeling like they need to know everything 
    •  How to prepare for the unexpected while still feeling empowered about birth 
    •  The biggest takeaway Gina hopes every expecting mother learns before going into labor 

    Whether you're pregnant with your first baby, preparing for another birth, or know someone who is expecting, this episode offers an important conversation about feeling informed, supported, and prepared for the delivery room.

    Connect with Gina:

    https://www.tiktok.com/@ginacmundy?lang=en
    https://www.instagram.com/ginamundy/
    https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100093989808329
    https://www.linkedin.com/in/gina-mundy-70318554/
    https://www.youtube.com/@thechildbirthattorney
    www.ginamundy.com


    📺 Watch the episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpw5ui4uxJHx0tLFVtpnfSkpObfc4d-K

    You can find Katie at:
    website: burntpancakes.com
    YouTube: @burnt.pancakes
    Instagram: @burntpancakeswithkatie
    Email: [email protected]

    🚽 Did you know Katie is also a Certified Potty Trainer? 🚽

    ☎️ Schedule a 1:1 chat today: Schedule Here
    💻 Digital Potty Training Course HERE
    📖  Potty Training E-Book HERE
    🆓 
    FREE potty training resources HERE
    Instagram: @itspottytime
    Tiktok: @itspottytime_

    Some episodes include affiliate links at no cost to you. 

    1 hr 5 min
  • 161. Oh No… Am I Officially Old?

    At what point do you officially realize you’re getting old? Is it when a 7:00 movie suddenly feels way too late? When you start saying, “They don’t make music like they used to”? Or when you’re out on a walk and hear a bird and immediately tell your husband to pull out his bird identification app?

    In this  episode I share all the signs that my husband and I may have officially entered our “old” era.

    From Jake's unexpected love of birds, history biographies, nonfiction, and researching vacuums our their collection of vitamins and  inability to commit to a movie that ends after 9:30, getting older is starting to look a lot different than we expected.

    Katie also shares the hilarious results of our Spotify ages. 

    But despite the bird apps, early bedtimes, vacuum research, vitamins, and throwback playlists, there’s something really great about this stage of life. Because even though we might be getting older, we can still feel young and maybe getting older just means becoming more comfortable enjoying exactly what we enjoy.

    In this episode, we talk about:

    •  The moment Katie realized she and Jake might officially be old 
    •  How Jake unexpectedly became a bird person 
    •  Why a 7:00 movie now feels dangerously late 
    •  Saying “They don’t make music like they used to” and realizing the music from high school is almost 30 years old 
    •  Jake's surprising obsession with researching vacuums 
    •  The growing collection of vitamins in their house 
    •  Jake's Spotify age being in his 60s thanks to history, biographies, and nonfiction 
    •  Why Katie’s Spotify age was around 16 because her boys hijacked her account 
    •  Why getting older doesn’t necessarily mean feeling old 
    •  Finding the humor and joy in this stage of marriage and life 

    Question for you: What was the moment you realized you were officially getting old? Was it getting excited about a new appliance? Going to bed early? Complaining about today’s music? Or having strong opinions about your thermostat?


    📺 Watch the episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpw5ui4uxJHx0tLFVtpnfSkpObfc4d-K

    You can find Katie at:
    website: burntpancakes.com
    YouTube: @burnt.pancakes
    Instagram: @burntpancakeswithkatie
    Email: [email protected]

    🚽 Did you know Katie is also a Certified Potty Trainer? 🚽

    ☎️ Schedule a 1:1 chat today: Schedule Here
    💻 Digital Potty Training Course HERE
    📖  Potty Training E-Book HERE
    🆓 
    FREE potty training resources HERE
    Instagram: @itspottytime
    Tiktok: @itspottytime_

    Some episodes include affiliate links at no cost to you. 

    19 min
  • 160: What Happens When Your Birth Doesn't Go According to Plan? with Toni Curtis

    In this episode I sit down with maternal and women’s health practitioner Toni Curtis for an honest conversation about birth, postpartum recovery, maternal advocacy, and letting go of the idea that there is one “right” way to give birth.

    Toni shares her own traumatic first birth experience, when her concerns and requests were ignored and she suffered a hemorrhage that nearly took her life. That experience led her to dedicate nearly 30 years to helping other women have more support, information, and agency throughout pregnancy, birth, and postpartum.

    We discuss why so many women feel like they have “failed” when their birth doesn't go according to plan, what moms really need to know before entering the delivery room, and how to speak up when you feel like you're not being heard.

    They also get into the realities of postpartum recovery that many women aren't prepared for, navigating expectations around breastfeeding, and why your birth story—no matter how it unfolds—does not determine your worth as a mother.

    In This Episode, We Discuss:

    •  Toni's traumatic first birth and how it shaped her life's work 
    •  Why no birth experience makes you a failure 
    •  The pressure and expectations surrounding birth plans 
    •  What every pregnant woman should know before going into labor 
    •  How to advocate for yourself when you feel unheard 
    •  What to do when you disagree with your medical team 
    •  Why postpartum recovery deserves more preparation and attention 
    •  The realities of breastfeeding and letting go of shame 
    •  How Toni's maternal health model is improving outcomes for moms 
    •  The most important message Toni wants every pregnant mom to hear 

    Connect with Toni Curtis:

    https://birthwisedoulas.com/

    https://www.linkedin.com/company/BirthWiseDoulas

    https://www.youtube.com/@birthwisedoulas

    https://www.instagram.com/birthwisedoulas_/


    📺 Watch the episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpw5ui4uxJHx0tLFVtpnfSkpObfc4d-K

    You can find Katie at:
    website: burntpancakes.com
    YouTube: @burnt.pancakes
    Instagram: @burntpancakeswithkatie
    Email: [email protected]

    🚽 Did you know Katie is also a Certified Potty Trainer? 🚽

    ☎️ Schedule a 1:1 chat today: Schedule Here
    💻 Digital Potty Training Course HERE
    📖  Potty Training E-Book HERE
    🆓 
    FREE potty training resources HERE
    Instagram: @itspottytime
    Tiktok: @itspottytime_

    Some episodes include affiliate links at no cost to you. 

    46 min
  • THROWBACK: Bittersweet Moments: A Mother's Feelings on the First Day of School

    This is a throwback from August 2024

    Join me this week on Burnt Pancakes as I return from a rejuvenating summer hiatus to share the emotional rollercoaster as my youngest, my baby, starts school. Hear my candid thoughts on the developmental differences and the internal debates I faced about early academics, and why, despite my reservations, we ultimately decided this was the best move for our family.

    With all my kids now in school, I find myself entering an exhilarating new phase of motherhood. From the anxiety of that first drop-off to the unexpected freedom of having more time to focus on myself, I reflect on this transformative period. . Plus, I'll be sharing some heartwarming encouragement for moms with younger kids and inviting you to join me for virtual coffee dates to build a supportive community. Get ready for a sneak peek at some incredible interviews lined up for future episodes, and let's navigate this new chapter together!



    📺 Watch the episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpw5ui4uxJHx0tLFVtpnfSkpObfc4d-K

    You can find Katie at:
    website: burntpancakes.com
    YouTube: @burnt.pancakes
    Instagram: @burntpancakeswithkatie
    Email: [email protected]

    🚽 Did you know Katie is also a Certified Potty Trainer? 🚽

    ☎️ Schedule a 1:1 chat today: Schedule Here
    💻 Digital Potty Training Course HERE
    📖  Potty Training E-Book HERE
    🆓 
    FREE potty training resources HERE
    Instagram: @itspottytime
    Tiktok: @itspottytime_

    Some episodes include affiliate links at no cost to you. 

    26 min
  • 159. Summer Mom Survival: Can I Admit I'm Ready for School to Start?

    Summer is supposed to be magical, right?

    Lazy mornings. Family adventures. Beach days. Pool days. Popsicles. Making memories with our kids.

    So why do so many of us find ourselves counting down the days until school starts?

    In this episode of Burnt Pancakes: Momversations, I'm getting real about the less glamorous side of being a summer mom. I had visions of creating this amazing, carefree summer with my boys, but the reality has been a little different. I'm tired. I'm overstimulated. I'm spending a fortune on snacks. My house is constantly messy, and I feel like I'm saying the same things over and over again.

    "Close the door!"

    "Flush the toilet!"

    "No, you can't have a snack. We just had breakfast!"

    "Get off the video game!"

    "Go outside and play!"

    "Stop bothering your brother!"

    And then there's the complicated part of wanting my kids to have the freedom to just go outside and be kids, while also worrying about neighbors, accidents, arguments and whether they're bothering anyone.

    I'll share a story about my boys riding bikes in the neighborhood, a situation where a neighborhood kid got hurt while playing with my kids, and the guilt and anxiety that followed—even though it was an accident.

    I'm also talking about the pressure to keep kids academically engaged over the summer, my attempt at summer schoolwork that quickly became a battle, the never-ending snacks and grocery bills, screen-time struggles, preteen attitudes, sibling fighting, and the guilt I feel when I admit that sometimes...

    I just want school to start.

    Because maybe we can love our kids, cherish these years and appreciate summer while also admitting that we're exhausted.

    In this episode, we talk about:

    •  The summer we imagine vs. the summer we actually experience 
    •  The endless snacks and grocery bills 
    •  The constant noise and overstimulation 
    •  The never-ending summer mess 
    •  Parenting preteens during summer break 
    •  The things moms say on repeat all summer 
    •  The constant battle over screens and video games 
    •  Wanting our kids to go outside and play—but worrying about neighbors and accidents 
    •  The guilt that comes when another child gets hurt while playing with our kids 
    •  Why giving older kids freedom can still come with a huge mental load 
    •  The pressure to make summer educational 
    •  Why I gave up on summer schoolwork 
    •  Feeling guilty for wishing school would start 
    •  Why loving summer and being exhausted by summer can both be true 
    •  Letting go of the pressure to create the "perfect" summer


    📺 Watch the episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpw5ui4uxJHx0tLFVtpnfSkpObfc4d-K

    You can find Katie at:
    website: burntpancakes.com
    YouTube: @burnt.pancakes
    Instagram: @burntpancakeswithkatie
    Email: [email protected]

    🚽 Did you know Katie is also a Certified Potty Trainer? 🚽

    ☎️ Schedule a 1:1 chat today: Schedule Here
    💻 Digital Potty Training Course HERE
    📖  Potty Training E-Book HERE
    🆓 
    FREE potty training resources HERE
    Instagram: @itspottytime
    Tiktok: @itspottytime_

    Some episodes include affiliate links at no cost to you. 

    21 min
  • 158. Decoding Gen Alpha (Because... Bruh.)

    Your sweet little kid is suddenly spending all their time in their bedroom, doesn't want to participate in family activities, and somehow speaks a language you don't understand.

    Welcome to raising a preteen! 😂

    In this episode we're talking about the weird, funny, sometimes emotional transition from having a little kid to raising a preteen. It's a stage where our kids are becoming more independent, craving privacy, and sometimes acting like hanging out with their parents is the absolute worst thing they could possibly imagine.

    And then there's the language...

    Because what exactly does "bruh," "buns," "cheeks," "chud," and "twin" mean?!

    And if your preteen tells you "W Mom," congratulations! You've officially earned a win. 🙌

    We'll also talk about the phrase every preteen mom knows all too well:

    "In a sec."

    Need them to get dressed?
     "In a sec."

    Take out the trash?
     "In a sec."

    Get in the car?
     "In a sec."

    And somehow, "in a sec" can mean anything from 30 seconds to approximately three business days. 😂

    In this episode, we talk about:

    •  Why your preteen suddenly doesn't want to hang out with you anymore 
    •  The emotional side of watching your little kid become more independent 
    •  Why they would rather be in their bedroom than participate in family activities 
    •  How to stay connected when your child doesn't seem interested in connecting 
    •  Why preteens seem to develop their own language overnight 
    •  Decoding bruh, buns, cheeks, chud, and twin
    •  What "W Mom" means—and why getting one feels like a parenting trophy 
    •  Why "in a sec" is apparently not an actual measurement of time 
    •  How preteens can seem so grown up one minute and still so little the next 
    •  Finding new ways to connect with your child as they grow 
    •  Why this stage can be bittersweet but also really fun 

    The preteen years can be confusing. We're learning how to give our kids more independence while still reminding them that we're here when they need us.

    And yes, we're also trying to figure out what the heck they're talking about.

    Because apparently we're raising kids and learning a new language at the same time.

    If you're in the preteen stage too, you're definitely not alone!


    📺 Watch the episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpw5ui4uxJHx0tLFVtpnfSkpObfc4d-K

    You can find Katie at:
    website: burntpancakes.com
    YouTube: @burnt.pancakes
    Instagram: @burntpancakeswithkatie
    Email: [email protected]

    🚽 Did you know Katie is also a Certified Potty Trainer? 🚽

    ☎️ Schedule a 1:1 chat today: Schedule Here
    💻 Digital Potty Training Course HERE
    📖  Potty Training E-Book HERE
    🆓 
    FREE potty training resources HERE
    Instagram: @itspottytime
    Tiktok: @itspottytime_

    Some episodes include affiliate links at no cost to you. 

    21 min
  • 157. Talking About Puberty Doesn't Have to Be Awkward


    Many parents dread "the talk," but what if we've been thinking about it all wrong?

    In this episode, I sit down with Amy Streavel and Faviola Mercado from Planned Parenthood of Orange and San Bernardino Counties to discuss how parents can confidently navigate conversations about puberty, body changes, relationships, and sexual health with their children.

    Together they share why these conversations should start earlier than most parents think, how to create an open and judgment-free environment, and how to help kids separate facts from the misinformation they encounter online.

    Whether you're raising young children, tweens, or teens, this episode offers practical tips to help build trust and keep communication open throughout every stage of development.

    In this episode, we discuss:

    •  Why "the talk" should be an ongoing conversation instead of one big discussion 
    •  When parents should begin talking about puberty 
    •  Five important puberty topics every child should understand 
    •  How to reduce awkwardness and answer difficult questions 
    •  Helping teens build confidence and healthy communication skills 
    •  Navigating misinformation on social media 
    •  How to become your child's trusted source for accurate information 
    •  Tips for parents who don't feel prepared for these conversations 

    Connect with Amy and Faviola

    • Substack: @pposbc
    • Twitter/X: @PPOSBC 
    • Instagram: @plannedparenthoodosbc 
    • Facebook: @plannedparenthoodosbc
    • TikTok: @pposbc_


    📺 Watch the episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOpw5ui4uxJHx0tLFVtpnfSkpObfc4d-K

    You can find Katie at:
    website: burntpancakes.com
    YouTube: @burnt.pancakes
    Instagram: @burntpancakeswithkatie
    Email: [email protected]

    🚽 Did you know Katie is also a Certified Potty Trainer? 🚽

    ☎️ Schedule a 1:1 chat today: Schedule Here
    💻 Digital Potty Training Course HERE
    📖  Potty Training E-Book HERE
    🆓 
    FREE potty training resources HERE
    Instagram: @itspottytime
    Tiktok: @itspottytime_

    Some episodes include affiliate links at no cost to you. 

    35 min

About Burnt Pancakes: Momversations | Conversations for Imperfect Moms, Chats About Mom Life & Interviews with Real Mamas

From the publisher's feed

The Burnt Pancakes Podcast is here to remind you that in motherhood, EVERYONE BURNS THEIR FIRST PANCAKE. I’m Katie Fenske, a (not so perfect) mom of 3, and I’m inviting you to join in on my…

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