This episode is brought to you by Green Frog Delivery, the only people more reliable than Ian’s casino luck. Use promo code DAMMIT at greenfrogdelivery.com for up to 40% off. And the price you see? That’s it. Taxes are already cooked in. Boom.

The crew is back with the first of TWO episodes a week. What could go wrong?

• We kick things off with the Patreon Party and That Damn Night Out – karaoke disasters, Ian’s casino luck, Thunder Cover murdering the stage, Stroke rolling in late, and yes…the cops showed up.

• Voicemails bring us everything from OD's in Stockton CA stories to a hype man who might be our new intro guy. And Jesse is back!

• Then it’s Netflix time: we rip into Unknown Number: The High School Catfish. The story of a Michigan mom who spent over a year catfishing her own teenage daughter. Naturally, this leads to our Top 10 Shittiest Parents breakdown.

• Creepy or Crazy is back with minimalist hookups, fate-obsessed texters, and mirror sex. (Don’t ask.)

• WTF News with Jenn drops gems about doctors warning you not to poop-scroll, a fugitive in a Speedo, and a Santa Barbara clinic scandal that’ll make you bleach your eyes... We have the video

• And of course, the Urban Dictionary Game nobody asked for

It’s a lot. It’s dumb. It’s us.

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Thursday, we’re taking you from heavy to ridiculous:

• 🛩️ 9/11 – we start serious with a clip to “never forget” and our own memories.
• 👽 Then it flips into the Top 10 Harmless Conspiracies people actually believe 
• 🙏 Damn Confessional – anonymous sins from the Dammits that’ll make you feel better about your own life.
• 🐊 Florida Man – back with another round of gator-loving stupidity.
• 🍆 CraigsLust – the horniest corner of the internet, read out loud so you don’t have to.

From dark to dumb in one episode. Subscribe now so you don’t miss it.