Chapel Probation

Like many of us, Sarah Henn Hayward did everything she could to remain a christian. She read books, she asked questions, and she learned to be inclusive and affirming. And everything she did to remain helped her deconstruct all the way out of christianity. It's not so much a "slippery slope" as it is a snowball succumbing to gravity as it rolls down a hill, gathering mass and momentum. And it's a glorious ride.

Chapel Probation is part of the ⁠⁠Dauntless Media Collective⁠⁠

Join the ⁠⁠Dauntless Media Discord ⁠⁠for more conversation with all the podcast communities.

Scott's book, ⁠⁠Asian-American-Apostate- Losing Religion and Finding Myself at an Evangelical University⁠⁠ is available now!

Music by Scott Okamoto, ⁠⁠Jenyi⁠⁠, ⁠⁠Azeem Khan⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠Shin Kawasaki⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠Wingo Shackleford⁠⁠

Join the ⁠⁠Chapel Probation Patreon ⁠⁠ to support Scott and for bonus content. 

Join the ⁠⁠Chapel Probation Facebook⁠⁠ group to continue the conversations.

Follow Scott on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠Twitter⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠Substack⁠⁠

You can subscribe to Scott's newsletter and learn more about the book, the blog, and performances at ⁠⁠rscottokamoto.com⁠

Ryan "RL" Stollar is an invaluable online presence, writing about homeschooling and child liberation theology on his blog and for many online publications. His new book, The Kingdom of Children, is a must-read for those of us interested in fighting the fundamentalist christian parenting movements that seek to indoctrinate children with harmful ideologies. With resources like Ryan, we can use the Bible against the evangelicals.

The bonus segment is a rendition of an old blog post I did when my kids were young. In it, I decry parenting norms and call for an end to Christmas. You know. That whole thing.

Chapel Probation is part of the ⁠⁠Dauntless Media Collective⁠⁠

Join the ⁠⁠Dauntless Media Discord ⁠⁠for more conversation with all the podcast communities.

Scott's book, ⁠⁠Asian-American-Apostate- Losing Religion and Finding Myself at an Evangelical University⁠⁠ is available now!

Music by Scott Okamoto, ⁠⁠Jenyi⁠⁠, ⁠⁠Azeem Khan⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠Shin Kawasaki⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠Wingo Shackleford⁠⁠

Join the ⁠⁠Chapel Probation Patreon ⁠⁠ to support Scott and for bonus content. 

Join the ⁠⁠Chapel Probation Facebook⁠⁠ group to continue the conversations.

Follow Scott on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠Twitter⁠⁠ and ⁠⁠Substack⁠⁠

You can subscribe to Scott's newsletter and learn more about the book, the blog, and performances at ⁠⁠rscottokamoto.com⁠

I met Simon Graham during my last year at UC San Diego, and though we've rarely seen each since that year, we've kept in touch, marking our growth as people, as husbands, and as fathers in this complex world. And Simon is one of the finest humans I've had the pleasure of knowing. In the past year, we've talked about our views on race, gender, patriarchy, and all aspects of life, and I knew I wanted to have a conversation with him on Chapel Probation. Think of this as an adjacent conversation to our usual talk of religious deconstruction. We're skipping ahead from religion and just focusing on what it takes to be a good human on this planet. And Simon is winning.

Here is a link to his daughter Zeta's Youth Ted Talk.

Chapel Probation is part of the ⁠Dauntless Media Collective⁠

Join the ⁠Dauntless Media Discord ⁠for more conversation with all the podcast communities.

Scott's book, ⁠Asian-American-Apostate- Losing Religion and Finding Myself at an Evangelical University⁠ is available now!

Music by Scott Okamoto, ⁠Jenyi⁠, ⁠Azeem Khan⁠, and ⁠Shin Kawasaki⁠ and ⁠Wingo Shackleford⁠

Join the ⁠Chapel Probation Patreon ⁠ to support Scott and for bonus content. 

Join the ⁠Chapel Probation Facebook⁠ group to continue the conversations.

Follow Scott on ⁠Instagram⁠ and ⁠Twitter⁠ and ⁠Substack⁠

You can subscribe to Scott's newsletter and learn more about the book, the blog, and performances at ⁠rscottokamoto.com

I bonded with Jo Luehmann last year over our shared love of comedian Atsuko Okatsuka, and I even had the honor of introducing Jo to Atsuko. Two epic women for sure. In this bonus episode while I'm on vacation, Jo and I talk about our books while sitting on a bench in Central Park just a stone's throw from one of Turmp's towers. Jo's forthcoming book, Predatory God is due out next year, and she's currently in the editing phase, which can be a soul-crushing part of the writing process. From the haunting voices of our past selves to the patriarchal and White-dominated world we all live in, it can be tough to fight through our traumas to write a book. But Jo is doing it. She even wrote one of the endorsements for my book.

As we talked about our books, we get deep into our lives and our processes, and I hope you enjoy this candid, vulnerable conversation between to friends and writers.

Chapel Probation is part of the ⁠Dauntless Media Collective⁠

Join the ⁠Dauntless Media Discord ⁠for more conversation with all the podcast communities.

Scott's book, ⁠Asian-American-Apostate- Losing Religion and Finding Myself at an Evangelical University⁠ is available now!

Music by Scott Okamoto, ⁠Jenyi⁠, ⁠Azeem Khan⁠, and ⁠Shin Kawasaki⁠ and ⁠Wingo Shackleford⁠

Join the ⁠Chapel Probation Patreon ⁠ to support Scott and for bonus content. 

Join the ⁠Chapel Probation Facebook⁠ group to continue the conversations.

Follow Scott on ⁠Instagram⁠ and ⁠Twitter⁠ and ⁠Substack⁠

You can subscribe to Scott's newsletter and learn more about the book, the blog, and performances at ⁠rscottokamoto.com⁠

Ben is a friend I first met at the epic PDX meetup last year. He had told me a little about his past as an evangelical who wanted to be a pastor or some kind of biblical scholar, but I had no idea how far he had come from his early adulthood. It's really an honor to bring you this story that goes all the usual places with problematic evangelical culture and dodgy theology and ends up with Ben just trying to heal and be the best father and partner he can be. I was moved by Ben's willingness to be his authentic self and talk about his life.

Chapel Probation is part of the ⁠Dauntless Media Collective⁠

Join the ⁠Dauntless Media Discord ⁠for more conversation with all the podcast communities.

Scott's book, ⁠Asian-American-Apostate- Losing Religion and Finding Myself at an Evangelical University⁠ is available now!

Music by Scott Okamoto, ⁠Jenyi⁠, ⁠Azeem Khan⁠, and ⁠Shin Kawasaki⁠ and ⁠Wingo Shackleford⁠

Join the ⁠Chapel Probation Patreon ⁠ to support Scott and for bonus content. 

Join the ⁠Chapel Probation Facebook⁠ group to continue the conversations.

Follow Scott on ⁠Instagram⁠ and ⁠Twitter⁠ and ⁠Substack⁠

You can subscribe to Scott's newsletter and learn more about the book, the blog, and performances at ⁠rscottokamoto.com⁠

Back at APU with another of the badass Sisters 9 writing group. Kristin Luna, aka K-wing, was such an important person to me. She was part of the group of students who saw me and welcomed me in as a fellow fringe/bad person at APU. I remembered my mentor professors who let me into their personal lives at UC San Diego, and I allowed myself to be that professor with them. And Kristin being an amazing writer meant we spent a lot of time workshopping her work and talking about life. I saw her go through some of the toughest times of her life, but I also saw her meet her now husband Nik. I even went to their wedding in the Bay Area.

But we've never really talked much about the christian stuff before, so this was an amazing chance to unpack all the turmoil and all the great times we had as we went through it.

At the end, there is a special "Band of my Deconstruction" segment with Sugarcult, who Kristin and I went to see once in Bakersfield, where she was living with her father at the time.

Chapel Probation is part of the Dauntless Media Collective

Join the Dauntless Media Discord for more conversation with all the podcast communities.

Scott's book, Asian-American-Apostate- Losing Religion and Finding Myself at an Evangelical University is available now!

Music by Scott Okamoto, Jenyi, Azeem Khan, and Shin Kawasaki and Wingo Shackleford

Join the Chapel Probation Patreon  to support Scott and for bonus content. 

Join the Chapel Probation Facebook group to continue the conversations.

Follow Scott on Instagram and Twitter and Substack

You can subscribe to Scott's newsletter and learn more about the book, the blog, and performances at rscottokamoto.com

I spend way too much time trying to figure out how fundamentalist, conservative White folks become enlightened and caring of the world around them. We may never know, but meeting Tim Cooper has given me hope. Tim deconverted slowly over time and taught himself to interrogate first his faith and then his worldview. And in a relatively short time, he has become an incredible human being, far from his religious and White-centered past. As recently as 2022, he was still trying to live as a christian, but no more. After going to Masters College, he asked all the questions even as he repeatedly doubled down on his faith. And then he decided to stop doubling down. And the world is better for it.

Sketch-Alert: After hearing Tim talk about how Masters is known as a school that is "serious" about the bible, I let some King Louie inspire me to come up with a sketch based on Monty Python moments. A bunch of christian college admins go on a talk show to decide whose school is the most serious about the bible. CONTENT WARNING: The usual offensive material we are known for.

Chapel Probation is part of the Dauntless Media Collective

Join the Dauntless Media Discord for more conversation with all the podcast communities.

Scott's book, Asian-American-Apostate- Losing Religion and Finding Myself at an Evangelical University is available now!

Music by Scott Okamoto, Jenyi, Azeem Khan, and Shin Kawasaki and Wingo Shackleford

Join the Chapel Probation Patreon  to support Scott and for bonus content. 

Join the Chapel Probation Facebook group to continue the conversations.

Follow Scott on Instagram and Twitter and Substack

You can subscribe to Scott's newsletter and learn more about the book, the blog, and performances at rscottokamoto.com

I was a guest on the podcast, This Is Not Church with Jon and Nat Turney a few months ago, and we had a great time talking about my book and rock music. Sometimes you meet people, and immediately click, and this was the case with me and the Turney boys. So when I heard that Nat was publishing his book, The Seeds of De(Con)struction, I messaged him to come do time on Chapel Probation. And we had an epic conversation about life, theology, and living life constantly searching for truth.

You can hear my episode of This Is Not Church here.

And definitely check out Nat's book, The Seeds of De(Con)struction.

Chapel Probation is part of the Dauntless Media Collective

Join the Dauntless Media Discord for more conversation with all the podcast communities.

Scott's book, Asian-American-Apostate- Losing Religion and Finding Myself at an Evangelical University is available now!

Music by Scott Okamoto, Jenyi, Azeem Khan, and Shin Kawasaki and Wingo Shackleford

Join the Chapel Probation Patreon  to support Scott and for bonus content. 

Join the Chapel Probation Facebook group to continue the conversations.

Follow Scott on Instagram and Twitter and Substack

You can subscribe to Scott's newsletter and learn more about the book, the blog, and performances at rscottokamoto.com

Jon Carl Lewis went to Princeton, but he sought out the repressive Christian elements he grew up with, hoping to "pray the gay away." But, he deconstructed after some horrific and lonely times to progressive forms of Christianity, eventually finding his way to leather bars in Boston and a life of sexual liberation. He has written and taught about sex and sexuality, even in largely White spaces like the Wild Goose Festival, using all of his life experiences to help others deconstruct their guilt-ridden purity culture pasts find liberation through their bodies and their sexuality.

Here are links to Jon Carl's work:

https://linktr.ee/joncarllewis

https://joncarllewis.substack.com/ - Ramblings (of a Queer, Christian Contemplative)

https://calendly.com/joncarllewis - I'd like to let people know that I'm available to talk about anything they'd like to explore spiritually (and sexually--but not with me). First hour is free. And that's often all some people want, although I'm open to providing professional spiritual companionship on an ongoing basis.

Bonus Segment: Songs of My Deconstruction

I look back at a moment that and a concert that changed me as a young college student for the better. The Indigo Girls, "Closer to Fine."

Chapel Probation is part of the Dauntless Media Collective

Join the Dauntless Media Discord for more conversation with all the podcast communities.

Scott's book, Asian-American-Apostate- Losing Religion and Finding Myself at an Evangelical University is available now!

Music by Scott Okamoto, Jenyi, Azeem Khan, and Shin Kawasaki and Wingo Shackleford

Join the Chapel Probation Patreon  to support Scott and for bonus content. 

Join the Chapel Probation Facebook group to continue the conversations.

Follow Scott on Instagram and Twitter and Substack

You can subscribe to Scott's newsletter and learn more about the book, the blog, and performances at rscottokamoto.com

Xeres survived APU as a neuro-divergent Filipina woman and went on to explore personal and generational healing through community activism and explorations into the mystical aspects of religion. Leaning into her culture and her identity have helped her to find ways to help others with her project, The Estuary Moments. And I've had the privilege of knowing and witnessing Xeres' development from her freshman year to now, almost 15 years later. She is a staff member of the beloved Tuesday Night Cafe, an arts and activism space in Los Angeles.

You can read more about Xeres' work in Inheritance Magazine.

Chapel Probation is part of the Dauntless Media Collective

Join the Dauntless Media Discord for more conversation with all the podcast communities.

Scott's book, Asian-American-Apostate- Losing Religion and Finding Myself at an Evangelical University is available now!

Music by Scott Okamoto, Jenyi, Azeem Khan, and Shin Kawasaki and Wingo Shackleford

Join the Chapel Probation Patreon  to support Scott and for bonus content. 

Join the Chapel Probation Facebook group to continue the conversations.

Follow Scott on Instagram and Twitter and Substack

You can subscribe to Scott's newsletter and learn more about the book, the blog, and performances at rscottokamoto.com