Happiness is an internal state that has nothing to do with relationships, money, or external validation, yet many women mistakenly define their happiness through others, particularly romantic partners.

• True happiness comes from within and is defined as "the state of being happy," not dependent on another person
• Many women get into relationships for convenience without ensuring they genuinely like their partner's personality and values
• Maintaining separate interests and friendships outside your relationship is crucial for personal fulfillment
• Motherhood shouldn't be your entire identity; children naturally separate as they grow, leaving moms who haven't developed themselves feeling lost
• Real friendships involve accountability and genuine care, not just people who agree with everything or gossip partners
• Online connections aren't substitutes for real-life friendships with face-to-face energy exchanges
• Self-care isn't just about massages—it's about knowing yourself and understanding your personal needs
• Money, relationships, and status don't guarantee happiness; even millionaires and celebrities struggle with unhappiness

Allow your passion to propel your purpose. Like, share, subscribe, and engage with me on Instagram @CNShep_chronicles.

When my vegan fitness trainer friend suffered a sudden heart attack despite doing everything "right" for his health, it crystallized something I've observed for years: men are carrying an invisible burden of stress that's literally killing them. Behind the mask of strength and stoicism, many men—especially Black men—are navigating life without safe spaces to process their emotions.

The alarming reality is that even men who check all the physical health boxes—clean eating, regular exercise, supplements—remain vulnerable when emotional health goes unaddressed. As a therapist, I've witnessed a promising shift in recent years with more men embracing therapy and emotional wellness, but we're still far from where we need to be. The cultural expectations placed on men to constantly provide, protect, and perform leave little room for vulnerability or decompression.

For women in relationships with men, this presents both a challenge and an opportunity. Many women unintentionally add pressure by demanding constant communication and attention without recognizing that men often process stress differently—through solitude and space. The most loving thing you can do might be counterintuitive: give him room to breathe. Whether it's letting him play basketball with friends on Saturday morning, enjoy his gaming time, or simply be alone with his thoughts after work, creating this space isn't abandonment—it's care. When you allow a man to decompress without demands, you're actually creating the conditions for him to return to you more present and connected. Your relationship deserves this balance of togetherness and independence, where both partners can show up as their healthiest, most authentic selves.

Have you ever felt deeply hurt when someone didn't acknowledge you in a room, only to discover later they were on an important call? Or perhaps you've been on the other side—completely unaware you've offended someone until weeks later when the damage is already done.

Drawing from my experience working with autistic high school students, I explore the fascinating parallel between their black-and-white thinking and how easily neurotypical adults take offense in everyday interactions. The student who couldn't understand why he should apologize for being misunderstood mirrors our own adult tendency to create entire narratives about others' intentions without checking the facts.

Our upbringing shapes our threshold for offense—growing up in a direct, "call-it-like-it-is" family made me straightforward in ways that sometimes unintentionally ruffle feathers. But what's most revealing is how frequently the "offender" remains completely oblivious while the "offended" person builds resentment, shares grievances with others, and damages the relationship without ever addressing the issue directly.

As a therapist who's definitely offended people unintentionally (yes, therapists are human too!), I've learned that feeling slighted usually reveals more about us than about the person who supposedly wronged us. The next time you feel that sting of being ignored or disrespected, pause and ask yourself: What are the actual facts? Could there be another explanation? And most importantly—can you simply use your words and ask, just as we teach children to do?

Your relationships will thank you for choosing direct conversation over silent resentment. And remember, before posting that vague grievance on social media, talk to the actual person involved—it's the adult thing to do.

Ever wondered how embracing your flaws could lead to unparalleled success in your relationships? Join me, Cassandra Shepherd, as I share my journey of self-discovery, where being perpetually late became a launching pad for refining my leadership skills. In this episode of Chronicles of a Therapist, I discuss how acknowledging my own quirks, like my infamous tardiness, has transformed both my work and family life, allowing me to stand firm against manipulation and leverage my strengths for personal and professional growth.

Through honest communication and self-reflection, we explore the art of nurturing healthy connections. By identifying personal triggers, such as the aversion to unpleasant odors, we can steer clear of unnecessary disputes and foster understanding. Let your passions illuminate your path and join me in an ongoing conversation about self-awareness and communication on Instagram  @CNShep_Chronicles. Here, the journey doesn't end; it only evolves.

What if adulting isn't about ticking off a societal checklist but about navigating a never-ending journey of growth and self-discovery? Join me, Cassandra Shepard, as I unravel the myths surrounding adulthood. Through my own stories of unmet expectations and real-life lessons, I challenge the belief that reaching traditional milestones like financial success or marriage signifies maturity. Instead, let's redefine adulthood by looking at mental, physical, and spiritual wellness as ongoing pursuits. You'll learn to measure success not by societal standards but by your own self-awareness and personal fulfillment.

Resilience and the power of a strong support system play a pivotal role in how we handle life's hurdles. Embrace the emotional rollercoaster of adulthood, from tears to anger, and discover how to pivot when plans falter. I'll share insights on the need for proactive support systems that do more than just nod in agreement. They're about offering real solutions and opportunities that inspire belief in each other's potential. By the end of our discussion, you'll be encouraged to let your passion fuel your purpose, with an open invitation to connect with me on Instagram for ongoing inspiration.

This episode tackles the essential but often romanticized concept of adulthood. Through personal anecdotes and reflections, we explore the critical responsibilities of adulting, the need for open conversations with teens, and the importance of fostering emotional resilience. 
• Confronting the myth of adulting as freedom 
• The significant role of parents in shaping maturity 
• Importance of realistic expectations for teenagers 
• Emotional regulation and resilience challenges in modern youth 
• Necessity of completing high school education for future opportunities 
• Encouraging open discussions to prepare teens for adulthood 
• Advocating tough love as a key to responsible upbringing

Have you ever felt a pang of anxiety when a favorite app goes offline? Join me, Kazandra Shepherd, as we unravel the emotional chaos triggered by a temporary TikTok shutdown that left many in despair. It’s a modern-day tale akin to losing old digital friends like AOL and MySpace. We’re not just talking about the inconvenience of a momentary glitch; this is a wake-up call about our deep-rooted dependency on digital platforms and how it's reshaping our emotional landscapes. By drawing intriguing parallels with "The Truman Show," I invite you to question whether our virtual lives are overshadowing the real-world connections we desperately need.

We also turn our focus to the delicate task of safeguarding our children amidst the digital whirlwind accelerated by the pandemic. The rise of social media has redefined the boundaries between reality and virtual spaces for both young and old, presenting challenges like online disputes, privacy concerns, and the mirage of digital friendships. There's a crucial conversation here, urging parents to be proactive in their children's online worlds. By nurturing open dialogues and setting mindful boundaries, we can guide the younger generation toward healthier tech relationships. Tune in as we tackle these pressing issues head-on, offering insights to help bridge the gap between the digital and the tangible.

In this episode of "Chronicles of a Therapist," Cassandra Shepard dives into the challenges of parenting and the emotional toll it can take on parents, which she refers to as "PTSD from parenting." Although she is not a parent herself, Cassandra shares insights from her experiences with friends, clients, and parents at her workplace. She discusses how modern parenting differs from previous generations, highlighting issues such as emotional detachment, instability, and the struggle to connect with children who often feel entitled and believe they know everything. Cassandra emphasizes the importance of emotional connection, self-care, and finding creative ways to bond with children. She encourages parents to seek support and to remember that parenting is a journey filled with trial and error. Tune in for practical advice on navigating the complexities of parenting and maintaining mental health. 

**Chapters:**  
00:00 Introduction  
01:30 The concept of "PTSD from parenting"  
03:00 Differences in parenting across generations  
05:00 Emotional detachment and instability in parents  
08:00 The importance of self-care for parents  
10:00 Creative ways to connect with your child  
12:00 Seeking support and building a parenting village  
14:00 Conclusion and encouragement for parents

Welcome back to Chronicles of a Therapist with Cassandra Shepard! In this episode, Cassandra dives deep into the concept of self-sabotage and how it can manifest in our lives without us even realizing it. She discusses the fear of happiness, the struggle with intense emotions, and the importance of problem-solving skills. Cassandra shares personal anecdotes and practical advice on how to recognize and combat self-sabotaging behaviors. Learn how to set goals, reflect on your life, and surround yourself with supportive people to break free from the cycle of sabotage. Don't miss this insightful discussion that encourages you to take control of your life and pursue your passions! 

**Chapters:**  
00:00 Introduction  
01:15 Understanding Self-Sabotage  
03:30 The Fear of Happiness  
05:45 Managing Intense Emotions  
08:00 The Importance of Problem-Solving  
10:30 Recognizing Negative Patterns  
12:00 Setting Goals and Making Plans  
15:00 Surrounding Yourself with Supportive People  
17:00 Conclusion and Encouragement  
18:30 How to Connect with Cassandra  

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In this episode of "Chronicles of a Therapist," Cassandra Shepard discusses her personal struggle with seasonal depression, also known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). She shares her experiences with the winter months, the impact of gloomy weather on mental health, and the importance of recognizing the signs of seasonal depression. Cassandra offers practical strategies to combat this condition, including the benefits of vitamin D, planning trips to sunny locations, maintaining a healthy diet, staying hydrated, and ensuring adequate sleep. She emphasizes the need for self-care and encourages listeners to seek help if they experience severe symptoms. Join Cassandra as she navigates the challenges of winter and provides valuable insights for managing seasonal depression. Don't forget to connect with her on Instagram @CNShep_Chronicles and subscribe to her YouTube channel, "Chronicles of the Therapist."