Church of Lazlo Podcasts

Have you ever wondered why those nude Greek statues have small packages? I haven't either but one woman on Tik Tok seems to think it's probably something we've thought about and she explains why you never see Dirk Diggler on display at the museum. *A lot of people said they would jump at the opportunity to have a clone of themselves and they would put that clone to work immediately. *Doomscrolling!! Amber Heard and Johnny Depp are still stealing all the headlines. A teenager died after being buried in sand at the beach. A mom gave away free burgers on Facebook after her toddler got ahold of her phone and ordered 31 through Door Dash. Was I not supposed to crawl inside the spider monkey exhibit at the zoo and feed the animals Cheetohs? I gotta blame ignorance on this one. I had no idea that was wrong. *What do One Direction, Shania Twain, and Missy Elliot all have in common? None of them can write a hit. *Get To Know Us! This week we are tasked with choosing tattoos for our coworkers and Snowcone really comes out on top. *Didn't we already talk about things that used to be great but aren't anymore? Why can't the internet come up with anything new for us to use? *Thanks for listening! Follow us on Twitter and Instagram @churchoflazlo and join our subreddit r/churchoflazlo See you tomorrow. -Everybody Wang Chung!!

Another round of Get To Know us! If you would like to ask us a question, head on over to our subreddit www.reddit,com/r/churchoflazlo

Artists you would be surprised haven't had a number one song

All of the news you can ever use in one place

Slimfast finishes getting us caught up on the news

Slimfast gets us caught up on the news

Apparently there's a reason all those Greek statues have small dicks

Is Cara Delevingne doing okay? Was she under the influence of something? Also, who is Cara Delevingne? *Moving on. Is Neil Patrick Harris okay? Why is he in trouble for something he did twelve years ago? Why did he have a cake made to look like the corpse of Amy Winehouse? I'm beginning to think that 2011 was a lot longer ago than it sounds. *Accepting the painful realities of life can be difficult but that's just the way it is. Life sucks, get over it. *Doomscrolling!! Congress wants to know if those UFO's have any baby formula on board. The Johnny Cash water tower is now the Johnny Cash water fountain. Johnny Depp's lawyer says Amber Heard never donated money to any of the promised charities. Amber points out that she did in fact pledge the money to charity. Depp's lawyer reminds Amber that "pledge" and "donate" are not the same thing. Amber points out that they are to her. *Remember Field Days in elementary school? Yeah, those were awesome. *Nick Wright is on the program! He's got NFL picks for the 2022 season and a few assesments about Julia's sobriety. *Women on Tik Tok are taking some time to point out how two-faced and disgusting men can be. A lot can change in 11 days. *Thanks for listening to the podcast. Don't forget to follow us on Twitter and Instagram @churchoflazlo and head over to our subreddit www.reddit.com/r/churchoflazlo and get your questions in for GTK tomorrow. -Everybody Wang Chung!!

The harsh realities of life

Neil Patrick Harris is in trouble again for a cake (or meat tray) he had made of Amy Winehouse