Someone bought Lazlo a bag of booze and a picture of Lindsay Lohan. That's the good part. The bad part is, Lazlo wasn't here so the person dropped the package off with the first person they saw in the parking lot. Turns out, that person was our boss and he had to hand-deliver the package to Lazlo today. *Let's say you make a dinner reservation only to be told by the hostess that you're still going to have to wait ninety minutes for a table? Would you throw a hissy fit and ask to speak with a manager or would you walk out and drive straight to Taco Bell? *It's National Singles Awareness Day or S.A.D. If you're single and can't seem to find the right person, it's probably because all the great singles are busy crying over their exes. *Doomscrolling!! People are pissed because the Russian figure skater is being allowed to compete after failing a drug test. The FBI tells Americans to be on the lookout for SIM Swaps. Is Russia going to attack or not? Violent crimes are up in the US. An American nuclear engineer has pleaded guilty to attempted espionage. The CEO of Delta has asked the DOJ to institute a no-fly list for unruly passengers. A woman discovers she can lactate from her armpit. Avocados from Mexico have been temporarily banned in the United States. James Blunt is not Josh Bay. *Lazlo apologizes to Julia for blasting The Who in the studio. *Lazlo and Julia take two BuzzFeed Euphoria quizzes to figure out which character they are from the show. *A DoorDash driver on tik tok shows what happens when people don't tip. *Kurt Cobain's daughter is dating Tony Hawk's son. Lazlo recounts the time he and Slim interviewed Frances's ex. *That's a wrap! Thanks for listening and have a great day. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram @churchoflazlo Join our subreddit r/churchoflazlo and check out our website www.lazlo.church -Everybody Wang Chung!!!!