Black Marriage Therapy

Communication | 3 C's of Marriage Series

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Before you get married most people will tell you that communication is foundational and super important to the success of your relationship. But what is communication? how can you communicate effectively? and what do we do when communication has gone off the rails and we are in conflict?. In this episode, we discuss all of these things and help to offer a new perspective on communication that can help it not seem like such a daunting task.

Podcast Mentions

Dr. John Gottman: The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

Libby Audiobook Library: https://www.overdrive.com/apps/libby/

BetterHelp: https://www.betterhelp.com/

TalkSpace: https://www.talkspace.com/

CBT Thought Diary: https://cbtthoughtdiary.com/

Challenges to Communication

  1. Not communicating
  2. Fearing that things will get worse-conflict delayed is conflict multiplied
  3. Expecting your spouse to be a mind reader
  4. Trying to be right
  5. Getting Defensive or shuti8ng down-being triggered
  6. Bad Listening
  7. Aggressive


    8. Junior and Chris Rules of Engagement

    1. RESPECT
    2. Do not use absolutes (all, non, must, except, every, not, always, just, only, and never)
    3. Allow your spouse to try again.
    4. Cheat for your spouse- tell them what you expect from the conversation
    5. Be willing to be wrong
    6. Be accountable
    7. Don’t lie, be honest.
    8. “I” statements
      9. ...more
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