Conversational Counseling

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Have you ever heard someone argue that boundaries aren’t biblical? Have you ever struggled with feeling like having boundaries made you unloving?

In God’s Word, we see just the opposite. In fact, He’s been instituting boundaries from the very beginning!

Throughout Scripture, God institutes boundaries to protect His holiness and guard the dignity of His image bearers. In the Old and New Testaments, people who crossed His boundaries could be placed outside the covenant community — not in a spirit of hatred but one of love that encourages repentance. 

Scripture can be weaponized to argue against setting boundaries. We hear that loving people shouldn’t build walls between brothers and sisters. Yet when we look more closely at Scripture, we see that boundaries are necessary to live in peace with all people. We see that love doesn’t allow cruelty to continue or sin to abound. Instead, boundaries make love more sustainable, truthful, and God-honoring.

Resources:

S12 E2 Worksheet

“Yes!–And No.” by Dr. Curt Thompson

Season 12 of Conversational Counseling on “Boundaries.”

To sign up for free visuals and discussion questions for this season, click ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Our theme music is by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠As Isaac⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

This podcast is made possible by engineer and producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shane Selby⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, executive producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Meleah Smith⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠generous donors⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Conversational Counseling⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alex Kocher⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and Brenda Payne.

⁠>> Click HERE to get free visuals, handouts and discussion questions for Conversational Counseling sent straight to your email! <<⁠

You’re not too sensitive. You can just say, “NO!” 

In fact, saying “no” might be the most loving thing you can do!

But when we consider saying “no” and setting boundaries, we often think: Shouldn’t I show more grace? I thought I was supposed to turn the other cheek? I should be the bigger person and bear it, right? 

However, a boundary doesn’t imply a lack of love or grace; it instead invites others to remember that they are and we are image-bearers with God-given dignity, agency, purpose, and limitations.

When we don’t set a boundary, we are allowing another person to be less than God created them to be. Just like with a lot of good things, placing limits isn’t always easy, yet these boundaries can bear good fruit. They prevent harm, foster accountability, and model behavior that Jesus Himself demonstrates throughout His ministry on earth.

Resources:

S12 E1 Worksheet

Season 12 of Conversational Counseling on “Boundaries.”

To sign up for free visuals and discussion questions for this season, click ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Our theme music is by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠As Isaac⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

This podcast is made possible by engineer and producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shane Selby⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, executive producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Meleah Smith⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠generous donors⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Conversational Counseling⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alex Kocher⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and Brenda Payne.

⁠>> Click HERE to get free visuals, handouts and discussion questions for Conversational Counseling sent straight to your email! <<⁠

What do we do when God seems silent or even indifferent to our suffering? How should we pray when we feel God has told us to wait or even said “no”?

It’s easy to let doubt, disappointment, or shame creep in when God doesn’t answer our prayers. Sometimes we pray for decades — good prayers for salvation, wholeness, or restoration — and God still hasn’t answered.

But we’re reminded that God’s chosen people waited centuries for their Messiah, and we are even now in a season of waiting for the final restoration. 

When God says “wait” or “no,” His response comes from a place of love and a place of omniscience. He knows what is truly good for us. He knows that in the waiting, we can experience more growth and more hope.

Our questions and our doubts shouldn’t be barriers that keep us from Father. They are instead invitations to continue surrendering control and trusting God’s plan.

Resources:

Conversational Counseling S2: It’s Bigger Than Forgiveness

The Practice of the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence

Season 11 of Conversational Counseling on “Sacred Access.”

To sign up for free visuals and discussion questions for this season, click ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Our theme music is by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠As Isaac⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

This podcast is made possible by engineer and producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shane Selby⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, executive producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Meleah Smith⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠generous donors⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Known Ministries⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alex Kocher⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and Brenda Payne.

⁠>> Click HERE to get free visuals, handouts and discussion questions for Conversational Counseling sent straight to your email! <<⁠

What can you do when you feel weak or anxious? When your mind is racing and you don’t know what to pray? Guided scripture prayer gives us the support we need to pour our hearts out to God when we don’t know where to start. 

God’s Word is living and active and personal to us. The authors of Scripture were not only speaking to their original audience but also to us, thousands of years later. While we’re praying a passage to God, we can insert our name or someone else’s name to personalize this truth as we pray over the circumstances in our lives.

Guided scripture prayer encourages us to use passages of Scripture to speak to God so our souls can grow towards Him on the trellis of His Word. As we struggle to find the words to say to Him, this tool of imitation helps us to fill our minds with the truth of His character and His promises until these truths permeate our own voice.

Resources:

Guided Scripture Prayer Instructions

Lectio365

Hallow

Abide

One Minute Pause

Pray As You Go

Season 11 of Conversational Counseling on “Sacred Access.”

To sign up for free visuals and discussion questions for this season, click ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Our theme music is by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠As Isaac⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

This podcast is made possible by engineer and producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shane Selby⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, executive producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Meleah Smith⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠generous donors⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Known Ministries⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alex Kocher⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and Brenda Payne.

⁠>> Click HERE to get free visuals, handouts and discussion questions for Conversational Counseling sent straight to your email! <<⁠

We live in a culture of busyness, of doing instead of being. We might fear slowing down and sitting still because the anxiety or emotions we’ve been pushing down often rise to the surface.

But contemplative prayer encourages us to be still in the presence of the Lord. In this quiet stillness, we can find His beauty as we combat our inner restlessness. We’re not emptying our minds or turning inward but reflecting on the Word and sitting in silence with the Spirit before the Lord.

This prayer invites us to simply “be” and not “do” as God welcomes us into His presence like a parent welcomes closeness with their child. It reminds us that God loves us for who we are, not for our performance.

Resources:

AI Counseling Discussion

S11 Ep. 4 / Lectio Divina

Breath as Prayer: Calm Your Anxiety, Focus Your Mind, and Renew Your Soul by Jennifer Tucker

Season 11 of Conversational Counseling on “Sacred Access.”

To sign up for free visuals and discussion questions for this season, click ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Our theme music is by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠As Isaac⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

This podcast is made possible by engineer and producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shane Selby⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, executive producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Meleah Smith⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠generous donors⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Known Ministries⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alex Kocher⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and Brenda Payne.

⁠>> Click HERE to get free visuals, handouts and discussion questions for Conversational Counseling sent straight to your email! <<⁠

In His kindness, God invites us to grieve in His presence through prayer.

When we lament, we’re not complaining to God or blaming Him for the suffering in our lives; instead, we’re grieving with Him. We’re acknowledging that the world is not the way it’s supposed to be in the now and the not yet.

In our grief, we often shut God and others out. But prayers of lament and the tool of process journaling invite God into the messy and the hard so He can bring the comfort and change we so desperately need.

God is not offended by our grief or our anger. He knows our words and our thoughts before we even express them in prayer. He understands our weaknesses, and as we honestly approach God through prayers of lament, we can find hope in His promises.

Resources:

Lament and Process Journal Instructions

Conversational Counseling Season 5 on “Suffering”

Free Known Ministries Lament Class

S5 Ep. 3 / Carol Collier on Lament

Season 11 of Conversational Counseling on “Sacred Access.”

To sign up for free visuals and discussion questions for this season, click ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Our theme music is by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠As Isaac⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

This podcast is made possible by engineer and producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shane Selby⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, executive producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Meleah Smith⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠generous donors⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Known Ministries⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alex Kocher⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and Brenda Payne.

⁠>> Click HERE to get free visuals, handouts and discussion questions for Conversational Counseling sent straight to your email! <<⁠

If you enjoy guided prayer through Scripture or enjoy repetition, the Lectio Divina is the tool for you!

The Lectio Divina reminds us that Scripture is not just information but an invitation to encounter God as we interact repeatedly with a specific passage.

Our lives are full of to-do lists and endless busyness. But each section of the Lectio Divina encourages us to take a step back from our hectic days to reflect, respond to the Holy Spirit’s prompting, and rest.

Resources:

Lectio 365

Lectio Divina Instructions

Season 11 of Conversational Counseling on “Sacred Access.”

To sign up for free visuals and discussion questions for this season, click ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Our theme music is by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠As Isaac⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

This podcast is made possible by engineer and producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shane Selby⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, executive producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Meleah Smith⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠generous donors⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Known Ministries⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alex Kocher⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and Brenda Payne.

⁠>> Click HERE to get free visuals, handouts and discussion questions for Conversational Counseling sent straight to your email! <<⁠

We serve a God who wants to commune with us. He is not distant; He hears, He sees, and He acts on behalf of His people.

The Immanuel Journal helps us meditate on these truths and invite God into our experiences through speaking the words of God over our lives. When we engage with this journal, we’re not pretending to be God. Instead, we’re listening for how He might respond and drawing from Scripture, from His character, from His heart and from our honest experiences to remind our hearts that He is close to us, especially in our weakness.

Immanuel means “God with us,” and this journaled prayer reminds us that with Him, we are never alone.

Resources:

Joyful Journey: Listening to Immanuel by Dr. E James Wilder III, Anna Kang, John Loppnow, and Sungshim Loppnow

Immanuel Journal Handout

Season 11 of Conversational Counseling on “Sacred Access.”

To sign up for free visuals and discussion questions for this season, click ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Our theme music is by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠As Isaac⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

This podcast is made possible by engineer and producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shane Selby⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, executive producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Meleah Smith⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠generous donors⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Known Ministries⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alex Kocher⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and Brenda Payne.

⁠>> Click HERE to get free visuals, handouts and discussion questions for Conversational Counseling sent straight to your email! <<⁠

Do you want to build a habit of prayer but don’t know where to start? 

One of our favorite prayer tools is the Examen Prayer! This simple structure can help you establish a rhythm of prayer and help you daily refocus your attention on the Father.

This prayer has five steps: replay, rejoice, review, repent, and reboot. As you become familiar with the structure, you can mold this tool to fit your preferences and the flow of your day as you reflect on the day that has passed and the day ahead.

While you reflect on the joys, fears and sorrows of your daily life, this prayer encourages you to live in close communion with God in the real moments of your day.

Resources:

The Examen Prayer Instructions

Season 11 of Conversational Counseling on “Sacred Access.”

To sign up for free visuals and discussion questions for this season click ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Our theme music is by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠As Isaac⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

This podcast is made possible by engineer and producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shane Selby⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, executive producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Meleah Smith⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠generous donors⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Known Ministries⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alex Kocher⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and Brenda Payne

⁠>> Click HERE to get free visuals, handouts and discussion questions for Conversational Counseling sent straight to your email! <<⁠

This season, we’re diving into prayer and introducing simple tools to help all of us move into a deeper understanding of God’s presence! 

If we’re being honest, prayer can be a place of a lot of guilt.

We struggle to find time to pray. Often our prayers feel like an overly-structured task to be checked off our to-do list instead of a relationship. Sometimes we even wonder if prayer is worth it because our situation is just growing worse. 

But prayer is so much more than this. God created prayer because He wants to have a relationship with us. Through prayer, we all can find a sense of awe in the access Jesus has given us to the throne of God.

Wherever you are in your prayer life, we hope this season will expand your view of prayer and that the Holy Spirit will move in your life to increase your desire for prayer.

Season 11 of Conversational Counseling on “Sacred Access.”

To sign up for free visuals and discussion questions for this season click ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Our theme music is by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠As Isaac⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

This podcast is made possible by engineer and producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Shane Selby⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, executive producer ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Meleah Smith⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠generous donors⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Known Ministries⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ is ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Alex Kocher⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ and Brenda Payne.