Dear Family,

Jeanette Yoffe believes family is so much more than our blood relations. Her strong desire to become a trauma-informed psychotherapist with a special focus on adopted and foster care issues began with her own experiences of moving through the foster care system and being adopted. Jeanette lived with her birth family for the first year of her life until she was put into foster care due to her mother's schizophrenia. Her father was not willing to take care of his two young children and when he later had a new family, he never told them about his previous children, continuing the cycle of secrecy and shame surrounding adoption. After living with a few foster families, Jeanette was adopted at seven and a half years old. Although she feels lucky to have joined a loving family who adopted more children, she still suffered trauma that led to mental health challenges.

In 1999, Jeanette took her New York theater background and wrote a one-woman play about growing up in foster care and adoption called, "What's Your Name, Who's Your Daddy" which was later turned into a book and audiobook. With a desire to create what she wished she could have received as a child, she began to work tirelessly to help other families. Now with over 20 years of experience, she provides mental health education and support as a psychotherapist, foster care social worker, clinical director, and trainer for L.A. County Child & Family Services and the Department of Mental Health. She teaches parents, social workers, and therapists all about adoption and foster care challenges, trauma-informed parenting, the impact of pre-adoption trauma, grief and loss, and open adoption.

Jeanette provides support to adult adoptees searching for long-lost family members as well as assists in family reunification. She is a Court Appointed Reunification Expert for Los Angeles Superior Court in cases involving children at risk for separation. She is also the Executive Director and Founder of Celia Center (named after her birth mother), a non-profit support center that meets the critical needs of all those connected by Foster Care and Adoption and all those who serve the community of Foster Care and Adoption in Los Angeles and beyond. She's just published her first children's book, "What is Adoption? For Kids." Her YouTube channel, Jeanette-ically Speaking (with a J) is a fabulous resource for adoptive parents, biological parents, adoptees, and anyone looking to learn more about the foster care and adoption challenges and joys.

SHOW NOTE LINKS:

Jeanette-ically Speaking YouTube Channel

Jeanette Yoffe's Website

Children's Book- What is Adoption- For Kids

Celia Center

What's Your Name, Who's Your Daddy- A One Woman Play About Growing Up in Foster Care and Adoption

Jeanette Yoffe on Twitter

Jeanette Yoffe on Instagram

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Dear Ukrainian Grandparents,

When I watch the senseless human suffering in Ukraine with tears in my eyes, it's as if my dear Jewish-Ukrainian grandparents' history is being repeated. My family was the lucky ones who were able to escape as is evidenced by me, their granddaughter and great-granddaughter whose Ukrainian blood runs through me and is here today to be able to podcast/write this without fear of censorship.

Seeing mothers rushing out of Ukraine with babies in their arms fleeing harm to find safety and peace to live freely is exactly what my great-grandmother had to do with her son, my grandfather more than a hundred years ago. My beloved grandfather was born in a shtetl, a village on the outskirts of Kyiv. Think of Fiddler on the Roof and you'll get a good idea of the life his family led. Grandpa's family was forced to flee because of the Russian pogrom, creating a stream of refugees looking for a home, displaced people looking for a safe place to lay their heads at night without fear of massacre.

The Ukrainians are living through a crisis that shocks the system like no other. Reports of young children and even animals in zoos hearing sirens going off puts them into a state of pure fright, a heightened state of stress. As a mental health advocate, it goes without saying, but I'll say it anyway, war is very bad for everything, especially mental health. Plain and simple it's traumatic with a future of PTSD.

It's impossible to equate the experience of living through war to that of watching it unfold on a screen but the people in Ukraine and around the world are watching the crisis unfold through traditional news outlets and social media. The stream of information is powerful because it forces us to pay attention and it gives us a window into the experiences of the people there- but it's a lot to process and it is especially harmful to our youth. With footage and photos from Ukraine flooding social media and misinformation spreading rampantly, the implications for public health continue to grow and continue to need to be addressed.

As a granddaughter, daughter, and mother I know one thing for sure… family is everything. My heart is with all the grandparents, parents, and children of Ukraine. I can not begin to imagine the fear and grief gripping the families on both sides of this conflict and so I will continue to pray that this chaos stops and that one day the Ukrainians and Russians will know peace and be able to have children who all can write their own stories or letters without censorship.

Please listen to this short solo-podcast to hear what I'd like to tell my dear Ukrainian grandparents and great-grandparents and the current grandparents, parents, and children of Ukraine.

SHOW NOTE LINKS:

Rachel's Family Photos and Corresponding "Dear Ukrainian Grandparents" Personal Essay

Ways to Help the Ukrainians Now

Ways to Help the Ukrainians Now

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Clancey Cornell is an artist, mental health professional, memory worker, and advocate for the arts who considers herself a very nostalgic person. She grew up in a family that was very much about expansion and exploration, the daughter of creatives who raised her in Los Angeles before moving her to attend high school in Italy. She's traveled the world, volunteering in advocacy efforts to lift up the underprivileged where she always finds beauty mixed in the suffering. Clancey is keenly interested in the intersection of arts, advocacy, and memory. Since 2015, she's mobilized arts-centered non-profit efforts in Los Angeles and collaborated with grassroots initiatives advocating for more access to art spaces in the Skid Row neighborhood, the largest homeless population in America. She manages archival projects for the Los Angeles Poverty Department's Skid Row History Museum, an organization that creates artworks and exhibitions connecting the experiences of people living in poverty to the larger forces that shape their lives.

While remaining connected to community initiatives, Clancey is pursuing a Master's of Social Work with a focus on Adult Mental Health and Wellness. Since the start of her program, she's provided group and individual therapy for individuals living with co-occurring psychiatric and substance use challenges in both outpatient and hospital settings.

Clancey loves training in Capoeira (a Brazilian martial art form), dancing, and making music with her fiancé. Her enthusiasm is contagious.

SHOW NOTE LINKS:

Clancey Cornell Website

Clancey Cornell on Instagram

Studio 526

Skid Row History Museum & Archive ~ Walk the Talk Archive

Lost Angels Documentary

Los Angeles Poverty Department

Skid Row History Museum & Archive

Women's Voices Now- Films by Women

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Michael Zibilich is a commercial real estate executive who resides with his wife, Gayle Zibilich, in Atlanta, Georgia. Michael and Gayle had their only child later in life, an astonishing blessing. Keller was a dream come true and as good a kid as you could imagine- a combination of strength and kindness, very mature, an athlete and expert white water kayaker, highly intelligent, and well-loved by everyone. After a very painful relationship issue with his girlfriend, and that information being broadcast through social media, Keller had an uncharacteristic anxiety attack during his second semester of freshman year in college at LSU. Keller attempted to call five hospitals to get help with no luck. An hour after helping out a friend and hours before going to a wedding with his parents, Keller died by suicide, completely shocking his beloved family and friends.

Devastated by their inexplicable loss, Michael and Gayle have dedicated their time and resources to promoting suicide education and awareness to college students throughout America. With the help of family and friends, they partnered with the Sigma Chi Foundation to create a suicide prevention hotline and an in-depth suicide education and prevention curriculum, called Strong Arms, for all 17,000 active Sigma Chi's across the nation. Ridding shame and stigma, especially among men who are in fraternities, sports, and the armed forces who may consider talking about feelings as weak, has been an important topic of discussion during Michael's speeches. Michael is also a speaker for Active Minds, the nation's premier nonprofit organization supporting mental health awareness and education with young adults.

Losing a child is the hardest thing a parent can ever go through, pushing Michael and Gayle into a state of post-traumatic growth, where their world was rocked so profoundly they can't help but make the world a better place so others don't have to experience the same heartache. They've found comfort and new friendships with the young adults who are the recipients of a scholarship they've formed to honor their son, Keller's legacy. Michael and Gayle remind us we all must consider ourselves as first responders, in our own lives, and in the lives of those we know and love and that our mental health is so important.

SHOW NOTE LINKS:

Michael Zibilich at Greek Talks- Georgia Tech

Michael Zibilich with Active Minds

Tracy Hargen on Dear Family,

Suicide Prevention Hotline-1-800-273-8255

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Dr. Raghu Kiran Appasani is an Integrative Psychiatrist, Neuroscientist, and Social Entrepreneur focused on bridging the gap between western and eastern practices to create a wholesome society by taking a proactive approach to health. He was born and raised in the Boston area, living in rural India with his grandparents for two formative years when he was young. His father, a biochemist at Harvard Medical School, opened up his labs for him to do research before going to Wesleyan to study neuroscience. He graduated from The University of Massachusetts with his Medical Doctorate in 2018, where he received the Leonard Tow Humanism in Medicine Award. He is currently the Chief Resident of Integrated Care Services at LA County + USC Medical Center and in private practice taking a holistic integrative approach to care. Dr. Appasani is the Chief Medical Officer at PYM Health, which stands for Prepare Your Mind. Partnering with Robin Williams' son, Zak Williams, PYM is the first neurotransmitter company focused on nutritional psychiatry through mood chews that target the body's neurotransmitter and amino acid levels to decrease anxiety and stress.

Dr. Appasani is CEO of The MINDS Foundation, a mental health nonprofit he founded that has been globally recognized. Through his extensive scientific research, he's published over 35 peer-reviewed articles, edited five books, and is a sought-after speaker and writer on mental health, entrepreneurship, global health, and consciousness. Throughout his medical career, he's focused on the impact of mental health in physicians, developing initiatives at medical institutions to combat suicide and build resilience, working extensively with Graduate Medical Education leadership.

Clinically, Dr. Appasani is trained in Psychodynamic Psychotherapy, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Intensive Short-Term Dynamic Psychotherapy, Cognitive Processing Therapy for Trauma, Motivational Interviewing, Group Therapy, and Exposure Response Prevention. He's currently a Health Equity Scholar in the MAPS MDMA Psychotherapy Program. His clinical interests lie in mood disorders (depression, bipolar), addiction, anxiety disorders, OCD spectrum, eating disorders, trauma, and personality spectrum conditions.

His passion lies at the intersection of mental health literacy, consciousness, global psychiatry, mindfulness, digital health, personalized medicine, psychedelics, wellness, and social entrepreneurship. Dr. Appasani believes that we all have mental health and therefore believes that healing occurs through the integration of psychotherapy, medication management, supplementation with natural sources, nutrition, and physical fitness. Above all else, he believes building community is very important in his own and everyone's healing journey.

SHOW NOTE LINKS:

MINDS Foundation

PYM- Mood Chews

Dr. Raghu Appasani on Instagram

Dr. Raghu Appasani on Facebook

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When my daughter was about five years old, she announced, "I love myself the most." In generations past, her declaration may have been viewed as self-centered, selfish, or self-absorbed but I was beyond thrilled by her exuberant proclamation followed by her proud and genuine smile. The reason for my glee was because at her tender age, falling in love with herself would be the secret to her happiness and a fulfilled life. Her positive self-affirmation meant she would always put herself first, never let anyone walk all over her, and make sure she prioritized herself above anyone else. I can honestly say she is not and has never been self-centered, selfish, or self-absorbed and in fact, is just the opposite. She continues to love herself into her young adulthood, attracting like-minded loving people into her life, perpetuating a self-love cycle. She understood then, and she still does, that practicing self-love is the best gift she can give herself for a life well-lived.

Self-love is a state of being where you appreciate yourself. It grows from actions that support your physical, psychological, and spiritual growth. Self-love means having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness. Self-love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being to please others. Self-love means not settling for less than you deserve. Self-love, like self-care, is not selfish.

Self-love means accepting yourself as you are in this very moment and putting your physical, emotional, and mental well-being first. Self-love motivates you to make healthy choices in life because when you hold yourself in high esteem, you're more likely to choose things that nurture your well-being and serve you well, especially when it comes to having healthy relationships with others. There's a reason self-love, self-respect, and self-worth all stall start with the word "self." You can't find them in anyone else. You, yourself have to do the work, but it's always worth the effort and the dividends pay off.

If you were never allowed the space to grow up where self-love was encouraged and appreciated like my daughter was, when you start exercising self-compassion and self-love for the first time, you may experience some discomfort and grief. You may come to the realization of how much you've missed, how certain people failed you, and what the younger version of you actually deserved. I'm here to remind you, it's never too late and YOU DESERVE SELF-LOVE!

Self-love can mean something different for each person because we all have many different ways to take care of ourselves. Figuring out what self-love looks like for you as an individual is an important part of your mental health. To practice self-love (notice the word practice), start by being kind, patient, gentle, and compassionate to yourself. Self-love is a journey. Enjoy the ride.

Listen to Hear 24 Free Gifts to Practice Self-Love.

SHOW NOTE LINKS:

Read the Corresponding Article- The Best Gift is Self-Love- 24 Free Gifts to Give Yourself

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Jennie refers to herself as a millennial orphan after recently losing her mother and father to suicide. She's also a friend, a sister to a Buddhist monk, a future therapist, a present therapy client advocating for mental health, and so much more.

Born and raised in Los Angeles to two native Angelenos, her childhood was idyllic as she grew up by the beach, surrounded by a loving family, and a successful entrepreneur mother as a role model. Jennie had a brief love affair with New York while attending Barnard College at Columbia University where she studied economics, dance, and leadership. After graduation, sunshine and family called her home to California where she began her career in entertainment, media, and marketing. Most recently, Jennie led community and partnerships for the consumer health and biotech start-up Seed Health.

Shifting gears and finding purpose after losing both of her parents to mental illness, Jennie is now pursuing a Master's in Social Work at USC in the Adult Mental Health and Wellness department. She looks forward to continuing to advocate for mental health and bringing therapy practices to areas where mental health is often neglected. She champions the idea that mental health is health and that humanity depends on it being treated as such.

Jennie is deeply passionate about cultivating community and takes pride in her ability to connect people, places, and things with thoughtful care. She loves her family, big friendships, yoga, spending time in nature, pollinator spotting, neighborhood walks, breathing in the ocean air, pizza nights with friends, musical theater, the radio program This American Life, and watching all genres of television (but is especially into reality at the moment).

Jennie is dealing with the grief and loss of her parents by not being afraid to ask for help, to cry in public, and to turn to her community for support whenever she needs it. She is an incredible example of vulnerability mixed with strength to get through even the hardest of times by putting one foot in front of the other, being self-aware, and giving back.

SHOW NOTE LINKS:

Jennie's Article on the Local Optimist- Surviving Suicide Loss

Seed Health on Instagram

Didi Hirsch Mental Health Services/ Suicide Prevention

Rachel's Mom's Episode- Laurie Kallen Schwent- My Createive and Eccentric Bipolar Mother Whose Parents Both Died by Suicide on Why Life is Worth Living in Color

Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

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Katie Hanus is a mother and herbalist who some may say is not meant for our current modern cookie-cutter rushed world. She's the founder of The Handmade Life which offers herbal traditions, small-batch goods, consultations, and workshops. She shares her wisdom with us all today and on her blog, The Nature Wheel where she discusses her suburban homesteading and her two daughters' homeschool experiences with nature, food, ritual, and ceremony. Her connection with the natural world has played a key role in her most beloved life experiences. Both the Handmade Life and The Nature Wheel were born from a desire to share the abundance of joy and healing the natural world offers. Katie loves helping empower people as they build or refine their own unique paths to thrive.

Katie has trained to date with Sacred Journey School of Herbalism in Austin, Texas and with The Herbal Medics Academy in San Antonio, Texas with an emphasis on empowering healthy lifestyles in women and children. She's been supporting her own family's complex health, learning, and developmental needs for the past fourteen years through a variety of modalities and therapies. She holds certificates in permaculture design and nature-based coaching.

She practices sit spot, a sense meditation where you sit outside every day in the same spot and notice nature. It can be as little as five minutes a day and it has proven to be a true gateway to her emotional and mental well-being. Katie reminds us to notice, incorporate, and be grateful for the natural world and bring it into our homes and our everyday lives.

SHOW NOTE LINKS:

The Handmade Life Website

The Nature Wheel Blog

The HandmadeLife on Instagram

The Handmade Life on Facebook

Katie Hanus/ The Nature Wheel on Instagram

The Nature Wheel on Facebook

Mother's Quest Podcast

Fearless Farmers

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It's been said the two hardest days for parents are the first day home with their newborn and the first day home without their newborn adult. My oldest child has just flown the coop, left her nest, and started her own journey. She's in a new city two thousand miles from home, an independent young adult no longer under my roof. After moving her in and hugging her goodbye on her new campus, I'm here to report I cried like a blubbering baby in the rental car on the way to the airport without her. I also wouldn't want and can't imagine her being anywhere else.

Understanding the power of community, I organized a Care Package Party with thirty other families who had new freshmen who'd just left home. Knowing college kids love getting packages from home, they'd be even more excited to receive one with different items from so many families. The party was a success, mostly because all of us parents had time to be together, connect, and share. Before sealing up my daughter's box with a few things she needed from home, I wrote her an inspirational note I share on this podcast, initially hoping it would make her feel better but now also hoping it makes you feel better too. It sure made me feel better.

How bittersweet it is a parent's job is to teach their children not to need them anymore. The hardest part of this parenting gig is accepting your success. The moment my newborn's umbilical cord was cut, my goal was for her to create autonomy and have her need me less. It doesn't mean I can't remind my newborn adult I will always be there for her when she needs to rest her wings.

SHOW NOTE LINKS:

Corresponding Article- Newborn Adult- From Cradle to College to Care Packages

Grown and Flown Article on Care Package Parties

Project Dorm Room Website

Lisa Heffernan on the Dear Family, Podcast- Grown and Flown- How to Stay Close as a Family and Raise Independent Adults

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Thank you! Your support means the world to me. Wishing you love, happiness, and good mental health always.

Good mental health does not have to be expensive but ignoring it can be. There's no denying mental health conditions can require therapy and/or medication but a majority of achievement is within our own hands. Listen to this short-solo podcast on how laughter, dancing, hydration, friendship, exercise, the outdoors, rest, love and more are mood-boosters. The following are 10 of the best things in life (plus bonuses)that are free, make us feel better, and make us feel happier. Good mental health does not have to be expensive but ignoring it can be. May you live life to the fullest with good mental health and happiness.

SHOW NOTE LINKS

Read 10 Free Mood-Boosters for Mental Health and Happiness

(Related Dear Family, Podcasts):

In a Sea of Worry an All-Natural Stress Relief Life Preserver

The Importance of Friendship on Our Health and Happiness

Dancing Around the World and Creating a Mental and Emotional Toolbox

Laughter as Medicine- Laughter On Call for a Mother with Alzheimer's Becomes a Global Business

I'm a Failure and Proud of It

Trauma Specialists on Empowerment to Heal Your Body, Mind, & Spirit

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Thank you! Your support means the world to me. Wishing you love, happiness, and good mental health always.