Derate The Hate

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The Importance of Intrapersonal Empowerment in Bettering Civil Discourse

Today, I’m excited to introduce Erec Smith, another fellow member of the board of advisors at the ProHuman Foundation and a powerful voice for true empowerment and personal accountability, especially in today’s social climate. Erec is a research fellow at the Cato Institute and a former Associate Professor of Rhetoric at York College of Pennsylvania. His work explores how rhetoric influences our perspectives on anti-racism, activism, and the foundations of a free, pluralistic, and civil society.

But Erec’s reach goes beyond the classroom. He’s a co-founder of Free Black Thought, a nonprofit that’s challenging the status quo by celebrating viewpoint diversity within Black communities. Through their Journal of Free Black Thought, they share everything from poetry to scholarly work—bringing out the voices of artists, writers, academics, and public intellectuals often overlooked by mainstream media.

In today’s conversation, Erec and I dig into some critical ideas about personal empowerment and the dangers of a victim narrative. One of Erec’s key messages is the importance of choosing to be a “victor” in our own lives, rather than seeing ourselves as victims. He’s observed that the victim narrative, while powerful, often breeds resentment rather than resilience, which ultimately disempowers us.

We also explore some big questions: What does real equity look like, and can some equity efforts inadvertently lead to more division? Erec shares how outreach programs, when done right, prepare young people to navigate and thrive in college—not just to check boxes but to actually feel empowered.

Erec’s insights on intrapersonal empowerment really hit home. He believes that the path to civil discourse—and to bridging divides—is through strengthening the individual first. It’s only when we have strong, accountable individuals that we can come together with others to reach common goals and view no group as a monolith. At the heart of Erec’s message is this: through personal accountability and a commitment to working together, we can overcome almost anything.

Learn more about and connect with Erec Smith by checking out the full show notes for this episode at www.De

What have you done today to make your life a better life? What have you done today to make the world a better place? The world is a better place if we are better people. That begins with each of us as individuals. Be kind to one another. Be grateful for everything you’ve got. Make each and every day the day that you want it to be!

Please follow The Derate The Hate podcast on:

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Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or directly from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. Not on social media? You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our site’s contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact

If you would like to support the show, you’re welcome to DONATE or shop Amazon by going through our Support Us page and I’ll earn through qualifying purchases at no extra cost to you.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Send Wilk a text with your feedback!

Self-Love & Breaking A Cycle Of Self-Sabotage

Today’s guest, Judith Costa, brings a unique and powerful approach to something so vital in our lives: love. But it’s not just about love in the romantic sense—it’s about unconditional love, self-love, and taking responsibility for the relationships we have with others and, most importantly, ourselves.

Judith is an Unconditional Love Coach, Happiness Trainer, and speaker who has spent years helping people remove those inner blocks that keep them from truly embracing who they are. With a master’s degree in Analytical Psychology and Psychotherapy, she’s also a certified teacher of the Akashic Records and a Reiki Master. Her work spans a variety of areas, including self-discovery, past life regression, and even astrology, all geared toward helping people achieve happiness, abundance, and genuine connection.

In our conversation, Judith and I dive into what it really means to love yourself—how it’s a state of being, a decision we make to live authentically and fully. We talk about how often we hand over our happiness to others, how self-sabotage keeps us stuck, and why forgiving ourselves is essential to moving forward. Judith’s approach isn’t just about feeling good; it’s about understanding that love is always within our reach. She teaches that when we take ownership of our happiness, embrace our mistakes as learning opportunities, and become our own best friends, we can transform our lives.

Takeaways

• Unconditional love is a decision, not just a feeling.
• Self-love is essential for happiness and success.
• We often put our happiness in the hands of others.
• Forgiveness is crucial for personal freedom.
• Relationships reflect our relationship with ourselves.
• Self-sabotage often stems from a lack of self-love.
• Authenticity is key to healthy relationships.
• Every mistake is an opportunity for learning.
• Love is always available and never abandons us.
• Be your own best friend to transform your life.

Learn more about and connect with Judith Costa by getting the full show notes for this episode at www.DerateTheHate.com.

What have you done today to make your life a better life? What have you done today to make the world a better place? The world is a better place if we are better people. That begins with each of us as individuals. Be kind to one another. Be grateful for everything you’ve got. Make each and every day the day that you want it to be!

Please follow The Derate The Hate podcast on:

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Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or directly from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. Not on social media? You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our site’s contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact

If you would like to support the show, you’re welcome to DONATE or shop Amazon by going through our Support Us page and I’ll earn through qualifying purchases at no extra cost to you.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Send Wilk a text with your feedback!

Taking Back Your Health: Patient Advocacy in a Corporate Healthcare World

Today, I have another truly impactful guest joining me. Dr. Nikki Johnson is not only a physician with years of experience in pediatric critical care, but she’s also become a fierce advocate for patients navigating the modern healthcare system.

Dr. Nikki has seen firsthand how the doctor-patient relationship is often overshadowed by corporate healthcare interests and insurance demands. We’re diving deep today into some of the major challenges she’s witnessed – like how insurance companies and government policies are increasingly influencing which treatments patients receive. Dr. Nikki argues that these outside forces are eroding the core of patient care, where the focus should be on that personal bond between doctor and patient.

As the Interim Director of FAIR In Medicine, she’s leading efforts to educate and empower patients so they can take back control of their healthcare choices. We’ll be talking about her involvement with grassroots organizations like Free2Care and what it means for physicians and patients to unite against a system that can feel impersonal and, at times, restrictive. Through her work, Dr. Nikki is helping more people understand their rights and advocate for the quality, transparency, and choice that everyone deserves in their healthcare.

So, whether you've felt frustrated by healthcare decisions being made without you or just want to know more about reclaiming your power in medical care, stick around. This conversation with Dr. Nikki Johnson will leave you inspired and informed on what’s possible when we demand better from the system!

Takeaways

• Dr. Nikki Johnson emphasizes the importance of the doctor-patient relationship.
• Healthcare decisions are increasingly influenced by external forces, disrupting patient care.
• Insurance companies often dictate treatment options, complicating patient advocacy.
• The healthcare system's issues are often rooted in government policies and corporate interests.
• Physicians face challenges in speaking out against the system due to fear of repercussions.
• Advocacy for patients requires knowledge and understanding of the healthcare landscape.

What have you done today to make your life a better life? What have you done today to make the world a better place? The world is a better place if we are better people. That begins with each of us as individuals. Be kind to one another. Be grateful for everything you’ve got. Make each and every day the day that you want it to be!

Please follow The Derate The Hate podcast on:

Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , YouTube

Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or directly from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. Not on social media? You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our site’s contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact

If you would like to support the show, you’re welcome to DONATE or shop Amazon by going through our Support Us page and I’ll earn through qualifying purchases at no extra cost to you.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Send Wilk a text with your feedback!

Relationships Are The Foundation For Solving Our Common Problems

“Renewing our democracy has to start with rebuilding our relationships, and our trust, and our ability to lower the toxicity of our national conversation and our local conversations”

Friends, today I’m thrilled to bring you a conversation with someone who has spent decades working to bridge divides and bring people together—David Eisner. David’s career has spanned the worlds of business, government, and nonprofit leadership. He’s served as the CEO of the Corporation for National and Community Service under President George W. Bush, led the National Constitution Center, and formerly headed the Convergence Center for Policy Resolution. Throughout his career, David has been deeply committed to fostering dialogue and collaboration to tackle some of our nation’s most pressing challenges.

In our conversation today, David shares his journey into public service and why he believes that community engagement is essential in solving societal issues. We’ll also explore the role technology plays in polarization—it can connect us, but it can just as easily divide us—and discuss the erosion of trust in institutions as a result. David emphasizes the need for citizens to come together, build relationships, and work toward solutions, rather than relying on government alone.

We also touch on the unique role of faith leaders, who often find themselves navigating political divides, and the importance of their work in fostering dialogue and understanding. Ultimately, this is a conversation about rejecting toxic polarization, rebuilding trust through open communication, and finding hope in the growing movement against divisiveness.

Takeaways

• Community engagement is essential for solving common problems.
• Technology can both connect and divide communities.
• Polarization undermines trust in institutions and each other.
• Building relationships is key to effective community solutions.
• Faith leaders play a crucial role in fostering dialogue.
• There is a growing movement against toxic polarization.
• Citizens are beginning to reject divisive narratives.
• Trust is built through consistent values and open communication.
• Hope exists for a renewed focus on collaboration and unders

What have you done today to make your life a better life? What have you done today to make the world a better place? The world is a better place if we are better people. That begins with each of us as individuals. Be kind to one another. Be grateful for everything you’ve got. Make each and every day the day that you want it to be!

Please follow The Derate The Hate podcast on:

Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , YouTube

Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or directly from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. Not on social media? You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our site’s contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact

If you would like to support the show, you’re welcome to DONATE or shop Amazon by going through our Support Us page and I’ll earn through qualifying purchases at no extra cost to you.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Send Wilk a text with your feedback!

Forgiveness Is A Personal Journey Not Dependent On Others

Part of the ProHuman Foundation Board of Advisors Series...
learn more about the Prohuman Foundation at ProHumanFoundation.org

Today I’m honored to sit down with a fellow member of the ProHuman Foundation’s board of advisors, Dr. Fred Luskin. It’s a privilege to be in conversation with someone whose work in the field of forgiveness and emotional well-being has touched so many lives, and whose insights are invaluable for anyone looking to cultivate deeper happiness and emotional resilience.

Dr. Luskin has dedicated his career to the science of forgiveness, serving as the director of the Stanford University Forgiveness Projects and authoring bestsellers like *Forgive for Good* and *Forgive for Love.* In our conversation, we’ll explore how forgiveness and gratitude—cornerstones of Dr. Luskin’s research—are not just abstract ideals but teachable, actionable skills that can transform your life. From breaking free of the victim mentality to fostering personal responsibility and emotional health, Dr. Luskin’s work shows us that we have the power to reshape our emotional reality.

In this episode, we’ll dig into the science behind forgiveness, the dangers of labeling others, and why humility and vulnerability are essential for genuine healing. Whether you’re dealing with personal struggles or just striving for a greater sense of well-being, Dr. Luskin’s approach offers practical steps to move forward.

So, join me as we dive into this transformative conversation with Dr. Fred Luskin, and discover how you can take control of your emotional well-being through the power of forgiveness and gratitude.

Takeaways

• Forgiveness is essential for emotional well-being.
• Gratitude is the genesis of happiness.
• People often give power to their past grievances.
• Forgiveness can be measured scientifically.
• Victim mentality harms mental and physical health.
• Narcissism is often overused as a label.
• Self-centeredness is not the same as narcissism.
• Acknowledging vulnerability is crucial for healing.
• Forgiveness is a personal journey, not dependent on others.
• Humilit

What have you done today to make your life a better life? What have you done today to make the world a better place? The world is a better place if we are better people. That begins with each of us as individuals. Be kind to one another. Be grateful for everything you’ve got. Make each and every day the day that you want it to be!

Please follow The Derate The Hate podcast on:

Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , YouTube

Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or directly from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. Not on social media? You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our site’s contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact

If you would like to support the show, you’re welcome to DONATE or shop Amazon by going through our Support Us page and I’ll earn through qualifying purchases at no extra cost to you.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Send Wilk a text with your feedback!

How Personal Accountability Leads to Power, Freedom and Joy

Today, I’m sitting down with Robert J. Hunt, also known as 'The Accountability Guy.' Robert is a business owner, executive coach, and co-author of the book Nobody Cares... until You Do. He’s been running CEO groups in the Dallas/Fort Worth area since 2013, and let me tell you, this guy knows a thing or two about what it takes to lead with intention and accountability.

Look, we know the word 'accountability' can stir up all kinds of reactions, right? But Robert’s got a refreshing take on it that’s all about personal power, freedom, and joy. He’s not talking about someone else holding your hand and checking off your to-do list—no, it’s about you holding yourself accountable. That’s where real growth happens. We’ll be diving deep into how taking ownership of your life, your choices, and yes, even your mistakes, can actually unlock new levels of freedom and happiness.

Robert’s philosophy really resonates with me because it’s about transparency and vulnerability. It’s about being honest with yourself and owning your actions—something that’s easier said than done, especially in a world where it’s so tempting to fall into a victim mentality. But Robert believes, and I wholeheartedly agree, that shedding that mentality is the first step toward real personal growth.

Takeaways

• Accountability is about holding oneself accountable and taking ownership of one's actions.
• True accountability requires vulnerability and transparency.
• Victim mentality hinders personal growth and happiness.
• Accountability leads to power, freedom, and joy.

Learn more about and connect with Robert J. Hunt by checking out the full show notes for this episode at www.DerateTheHate.com.

What have you done today to make your life a better life? What have you done today to make the world a better place? The world is a better place if we are better people. That begins with each of us as individuals. Be kind to one another. Be grateful for everything you’ve got. Make each and every day the day that you want it to be!

Please follow The Derate The Hate podcast on:

Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , YouTube

Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or directly from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. Not on social media? You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our site’s contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact

If you would like to support the show, you’re welcome to DONATE or shop Amazon by going through our Support Us page and I’ll earn through qualifying purchases at no extra cost to you.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Send Wilk a text with your feedback!

Anger and Hate Are Rooted in Fear, The Cure is Found In LOVE...

Friends, I’m prepping and traveling this week for another speaking engagement, so I’m handing the mic over to my great friend and guest host, Julian Adorney. You may remember Julian from previous guest appearances on the DTH podcast. He is a writer, speaker and founder of the Heal the West, substack movement. Julian recently sat down for an insightful conversation with conflict resolution expert, Jamie Winship. 

Jamie has spent decades working in some of the most conflicted areas of the world, helping people and organizations resolve disputes in ways that go far beyond surface-level fixes. His approach focuses on understanding true identity, addressing fear and anger, and, most importantly, using love as a transformative force. 

In this conversation, Jamie and Julian explore what it means to engage in conflict with vulnerability and honesty, and why demonstrating love—even to those we perceive as our enemies—can lead to real change. They dive deep into how fear and anger are often secondary emotions, rooted in deeper issues, and how addressing those fears is the first step toward reconciliation. 

Julian did an incredible job guiding this conversation, and I think you'll find a lot of value in what Jamie has to say, whether you're navigating personal conflict or grappling with the larger divides in society today. 

Julian, thank you for stepping in and hosting this one. I know it’s going to resonate with our DTH audience."

Takeaways

• Conflict resolution begins with understanding true identity.
• Fear and anger are secondary emotions rooted in deeper issues.
• Love is the only thing that can take away fear.
• Humans respond to love and kindness, even from their enemies.
• Vulnerability is essential for honest communication.
• Demonstrating love can lead to transformative change.
• People often don't know how to articulate their fears.
• The first step in conflict resolution is addressing fear.
• Winning hearts is more effective than winning arguments.
• Everyone has the capacity to love and resolve conflicts. 

Learn more about and connect with Jamie Winship by checking

What have you done today to make your life a better life? What have you done today to make the world a better place? The world is a better place if we are better people. That begins with each of us as individuals. Be kind to one another. Be grateful for everything you’ve got. Make each and every day the day that you want it to be!

Please follow The Derate The Hate podcast on:

Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , YouTube

Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or directly from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. Not on social media? You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our site’s contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact

If you would like to support the show, you’re welcome to DONATE or shop Amazon by going through our Support Us page and I’ll earn through qualifying purchases at no extra cost to you.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Send Wilk a text with your feedback!

Leading Inclusion By Way of Personal Accountability

Friends, today I’m very excited to bring you a conversation that goes way beyond the same old talk about DEI – this isn’t just another conversation about diversity for diversity’s sake. My guest today, Delphia Howze, is someone who brings a fresh, real perspective on what it truly means to create inclusive environments, and as you’re about to hear, much of it starts with personal accountability.

Delphia is the CEO and Founder of D. Howze Solutions and serves as the Chief Inclusion Officer at a national laboratory. She’s been a driving force in the Diversity & Inclusion space for over two decades, with experience across industries – from banking to retail, to energy. Her approach is grounded in real-world results, helping organizations not just tick the diversity box, but truly harnessing the power of human capital to drive meaningful change.

We’re diving into her new book, Including You: Leading Inclusion from Where You Are, where Delphia takes a different route. She challenges each of us to look inward – to reflect on our own biases and understand how they affect the way we interact with others. It’s about more than just policies or training sessions. It’s about stepping up, having the hard conversations, and using something called ‘appreciative inquiry’ to really bridge divides and foster genuine understanding.

We’ll talk about why giving people the space to be themselves is the real key, instead of forcing our own expectations on them. And the best part? It’s not about pointing fingers – it’s about how we can all do better, one step at a time, and how that personal growth creates positive ripples around us.

If you’re ready for an honest, no-fluff conversation on what it actually takes to create inclusive spaces in your life and work, then stick around. This one’s going to shift your perspective.

Takeaways

• Personal accountability is key in creating inclusive environments.
• Self-reflection helps us understand our biases and how they impact our interactions with others.
• Engaging in dialogue and appreciative inquiry can bridge divides and foster understanding.
• Giving people the space to be themselves and not imposing our expectations on them is crucial for inclusion.
• Striv

What have you done today to make your life a better life? What have you done today to make the world a better place? The world is a better place if we are better people. That begins with each of us as individuals. Be kind to one another. Be grateful for everything you’ve got. Make each and every day the day that you want it to be!

Please follow The Derate The Hate podcast on:

Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , YouTube

Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or directly from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. Not on social media? You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our site’s contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact

If you would like to support the show, you’re welcome to DONATE or shop Amazon by going through our Support Us page and I’ll earn through qualifying purchases at no extra cost to you.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Send Wilk a text with your feedback!

Step Out, Step Forward, On a Better Path Forward

Joining me today is Rich Harwood, a man whose work and life experience have shaped the way communities across the country—and the world—solve problems and come together. Rich is the founder of The Harwood Institute for Public Innovation, and for more than 30 years, he’s been leading the charge to help communities rebuild trust, solve shared problems, and deepen people’s civic faith. But Rich’s journey begins with something deeply personal: growing up with a chronic illness and feeling like he wasn’t seen or heard.

Rich opens up about those early struggles and how they shaped his understanding of hope. He shares how setbacks in life—whether personal or community-wide—can either break us or build us into something stronger. For Rich, those challenges helped him see the importance of hope as a tool for resilience, something we all need, especially in times of uncertainty and division.

But this episode is about so much more than hope. Rich and I dive into the critical issue of civic engagement and the real, lasting impact of community-led change. We talk about the challenges of building trust, especially when it feels like our society is pulling apart. Rich emphasizes that the only way forward is through shared aspirations—finding that common ground where we can all come together and take collective action.

Takeaways

• Setbacks can shape us and teach us the importance of hope.
• Civic engagement and community-led change are crucial for addressing societal challenges.
• Conversations play a vital role in bridging divides and dispelling assumptions.
• The health of civic culture is a significant predictor of a community's progress. Rebuilding civic culture is essential for communities to thrive and effectively solve shared problems.
• Turning outward and understanding what matters to people is crucial in creating positive change.
• Politicians need to engage in a fundamentally different way and provide an environment for communities to solve their shared problems.
• Small actions can have a ripple effect and lead to transformational systemic change.
• Creating a culture of shared responsibility is necessary for a functioning community.

Learn more about and connect with Rich Harwood b

What have you done today to make your life a better life? What have you done today to make the world a better place? The world is a better place if we are better people. That begins with each of us as individuals. Be kind to one another. Be grateful for everything you’ve got. Make each and every day the day that you want it to be!

Please follow The Derate The Hate podcast on:

Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , YouTube

Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or directly from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. Not on social media? You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our site’s contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact

If you would like to support the show, you’re welcome to DONATE or shop Amazon by going through our Support Us page and I’ll earn through qualifying purchases at no extra cost to you.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Send Wilk a text with your feedback!

Confronting Racism by Dismantling the Illusion of Race

Our returning guest today is Dr. Sheena Mason, a powerhouse in the world of anti-racism and the author of the brand-new book, *The Raceless Anti-Racist*. If you’ve ever questioned the role of race in society or wondered how we can dismantle the structures that perpetuate racism, this conversation is going to challenge and inspire you. 

Dr. Mason is an assistant professor of English at SUNY Oneonta and holds a PhD from Howard University, specializing in Africana and American literature and philosophy of race. But what really sets her apart is her innovative approach to understanding race—or, more accurately, the illusion of it. In her new book, she takes concepts from her more academic work, *Theory of Racelessness*, that  you may remember us discussing back in DTH episode 127, and makes them accessible to a broader audience.

We’re going to dive into the heart of that theory. Dr. Mason and I will explore how the internalization of oppression affects us all, the very real material impacts of racism, and how tools like the 'Togetherness Wayfinder' and 'Raceless Translator' can bring people together. We’ll also tackle some tough questions: What role do media, government, and capitalism play in maintaining racial divisions? And how do we dismantle the illusion of race to truly confront racism head-on?

Takeaways

• Dr. Sheena Mason's new book, 'The Raceless Anti-Racist,' is geared towards a wider audience and introduces the concept of the Togetherness Wayfinder.
• Recognizing the internalization of oppression and the material impacts of racism is crucial in dismantling racism.
• The Togetherness Wayfinder aims to bring people together and find common humanity in the face of contentious issues. Racialization as white does not equate to experiencing anti-white racism, but rather the effects of anti-black racism.
• The media, government, and capitalism play a role in perpetuating divisions and maintaining hierarchies.
• The Raceless Translator is a tool that helps interpret race in terms of culture, ethnicity, social class, and the causes and effects of racism.
• Engaging in conversations and exposing oneself to different perspectives is crucial for bridging divides and promoting understanding.

Le

What have you done today to make your life a better life? What have you done today to make the world a better place? The world is a better place if we are better people. That begins with each of us as individuals. Be kind to one another. Be grateful for everything you’ve got. Make each and every day the day that you want it to be!

Please follow The Derate The Hate podcast on:

Facebook, Instagram, Twitter(X) , YouTube

Subscribe to us wherever you enjoy your audio or directly from our site. Please leave us a rating and feedback on Apple podcasts or other platforms. Not on social media? You can share your thoughts or request Wilk for a speaking engagement on our site’s contact page: DerateTheHate.com/Contact

If you would like to support the show, you’re welcome to DONATE or shop Amazon by going through our Support Us page and I’ll earn through qualifying purchases at no extra cost to you.

I look forward to hearing from you!