On Today’s Show:

Introduction

0:00.000

The Full Audio From The Interdimensional Crazy Person

2:33.978

TempleOS’s Terry Davis Has Thoughts About Linux

7:41.935

Crackpot Preacher Peter Popoff Is Still Selling His Miracle Water

9:44.531

Televangelist Leroy Jenkins Water Scam

13:01.651

That Time Aliens Blessed Us With Miracle Water

15:02.709

The Newest Water Scam – The Miracle Water Making Machine!

17:36.468

Talking To The Mechanical Sounding Spirit Of Bob Saget And Betty White

21:11.156

Sign Up For The Sideshow!

25:19.901

Stalking And Stabbing Yourself

26:26.201

Long Covid May Equal Short Penis

32:46.485

An Extended Blind Date Due To COVID Lockdown

37:14.195

Voicemail line: 206-666-4463 / Ending

40:07.846

Voicemail: 206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) 

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Quick And Dirty Transcript

 

On Today’s Show:

Introduction

0:00.000

Tribute To A Betty White

1:33.133

The Sex Sounds Of Nikacado: Man Boobs And Ball Skin

5:46.030

Gabrielle Chana Goes Racist And Makes Chicken

16:30.499

A Public Service Announcement About Crovid Ninden

23:37.783

Like DV? Consider Supporting This Stupidity!

27:17.325

White Girls Commit Crime With Glitter

29:06.649

A Doctor Branded Organs With His Initials

33:02.593

Snoop Is Getting In The Wiener Game

36:48.899

Voicemails: 206-666-4463 / Ending

40:30.914

Voicemail: 206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) 

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Quick And Dirty Transcript

Tim HensonFreaks it’s Wednesday, January 12, 2022 Coming up on the program today, batting man boobs around with a penis is a unique way to get off. Plus, Gabrielle Channa goes full racist. Make sure you get the Mandela vaccine for COVID Nintendo and a criminal glitter bombing. All this coming up tonight,

Tim HensonYes, dementin back here with you for the Wednesday podcast. At the top of the show, you heard my belated tribute to the late Betty White. I wanted to discuss it a few days ago, but I was just too emotional. I honestly didn’t think this would affect me as much as it did, but I was really broken up over the whole thing, and I was surprised to find that most of America joined me in mourning her passing. Honestly, I didn’t think people outside of Distorted View listeners even knew who Betty White was. Apparently, she had some mass appeal. It’s especially surprising because we didn’t really feature Betty White that much on the show. Usually it was her husband, Elton, that we featured for those few of you who don’t know what I’m talking about. Betty White, one half of the musical duo Elton and Betty White, has sadly passed away at the age of 99. She lived a good long life, and thankfully, she leaves behind quite the legacy. Oh, so many songs from Let Me Suck Your Coochie to Foreplay Before Love to Funky Stinky Love and Who Could Forget Menopause Mama. And this is the way I make love and your smell. While her body is now rotting in the ground, her amazing music catalog will live on. She was our kind of lady filthy, obsessed with sex, always horny, even though she would really prefer not to give oral sex. It’s just her preference, and she really hoped you’d respect that. Here’s just a little more from Betty White. This is Jack Off Time by Betty White. Jack off time, right? Beat that meat. You’d better be careful if you do it often and don’t have anyone. You’ll probably never get anyone kind of a depressing song like the Intel’s anthem. Keep Jacking Off. If you Jack off too much, though, and you don’t have sex, you’ll never get anyone. Sometimes it seems the only thing to do and you might think you’re all alone.

On Today’s Show:

Introduction

0:00.000

The Westboro Baptist Church Players

1:59.134

Tantric Urinary Orgasms

4:20.901

The Sensual Sting Of Pee In The Eye

13:07.061

Anal Desert Recipe – Butt Berries And Ca-Ca Cream

17:16.842

Checking In With Our Favorite Sub Slave Tit Pig

19:34.268

Sign Up For The Sideshow And Support DV

23:29.790

That Wasn’t Reindeer Poop On Your Patio Furniture

24:37.015

Overdosing On Tanning Injections

28:41.363

Mother Locks COVID Infected Child In Trunk

34:48.437

Voicemails: 206-666-4463 / Ending

38:33.209

Voicemail: 206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) 

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Quick And Dirty Transcript

TimIt’s Monday, January 10, 2022 coming up on the program today, urinary orgasms. Let the stream of pleasure flow through you. Plus another dessert recipe made inside your asshole. A dumb teenager overdoses on tanning injections. Santa’s reindeer took a big fat deuce on your patio furniture. And now to perform a patriotic song. Please welcome the Westborough Baptist Church

Yes dimension back here with you to start a new week programs. Got a great show for you today. At the top of the podcast, we played a little bit of Wicked Land of Sodomite from the Westborough Baptist Church. Always a feel good song. We’ve actually played it a few times, but it’s always been an abbreviated, shortened version. The song actually clocks in at over two minutes. I like to keep it tight, though I feel a little wicked Land of Sodomite goes a long way. Although the entire song is pretty great here’s a little bit that I cut out for the intro. I don’t know why I should actually include it.

TimWhat could possibly rhyme with wrong

Timif you don’t know or don’t remember the Westborough Baptist Church. They’re the God hates fags Church. They’re obsessed with gay people. They think all gay people eat crap. They try to incorporate at least a line or two of feces eating in most of their song. Parodies, honestly, I don’t blame them in the least. I try to include butts or poop in all of my song parodies. You may recall my classic Journey spoof.

TimI really thought I was going to go home with a Golden Yankavik at last year’s Yankees. Apparently the Academy is not a huge fan of poop humor. I thought the lyrics were actually pretty smart when I say Stretch that behold and I stretch out the word behold. I mean that works on multiple levels. Christ, come on, my poop and butt humor is for the thinking man. Listen, as I stated, I’ve got a great show for you today. I think we’re done with the poop and butt content for a while, but it’s going to remain gross. This is Distorted View daily. After all, we have featured countless piss porn clips on the podcast,

On Today’s Show:

Introduction

0:00.000

I Am Frost Bite: Superhero Breather

2:14.943

Anal Belching From Deep Within The Gape

7:29.631

Chattering Dentures Along The Shaft

10:06.954

Pervert Gets Caught And Wants To Call Mommy

12:29.721

Crab Legs And Oral – Dinner Is Served

16:51.037

What To Get A Liberal For Christmas

18:41.000

Go Against Trump, Go Against God

20:30.312

QAnon Shaman And The Advanced Underground Civilization

23:18.996

Get Sideshow Access Now!

26:29.154

Farting In A Jar Is Hard, Dangerous Work

27:35.405

Freakish Elderly Puppet Twins Die Of The Rona

32:47.522

North Korea Invented Burritos

38:11.024

Voicemails: 206-666-4463 / Ending

43:39.134

Voicemail: 206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) 

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QUICK AND DIRTY TRANSCRIPT:

TimmybooIt breaks its Friday, January 7, 2022. Coming up on the program today, the sound of loose dentures up and down the shaft of a penis. Plus calling your mommy when you’ve been caught curving on a child crab legs in oral sex, dinner and dinner, dessert. And when you fart too hard in a jar, all is coming up today.

TimmybooYes, dimension back here with you for the Friday podcast. I have a great show for you today. I went and did my stupid sleep study. Everything was fine. The ambient kicked in, did its job. I got a good, I don’t know, 5 hours of sleep. So the doctor’s got some usable data, got some REM cycles in there. That’s the good shit. The CPAP mask they chose for me was weird because it was just like, the nostril thing. Basically, it’s just like this mess that goes inside your nose and shoots jet streams of air. And I told the guy at the beginning I’m like, Look, I know when I go to sleep, I breathe through my mouth. I’m a mouth breather. It’s not appealing. Not attractive, embarrassing. But that’s how I sleep. And he was like, Well, most people aren’t actually mouth breathers, but they’re not getting enough air or whatever. So we’re just going to make you breathe through your nose later on in the night. We might change your mask if you’re really having a hard time. And I just assumed I’m just going to end up sleeping through my mouth. But you can’t really do that when air is being shot up your nostril. I’ve never been on oxygen or anything before. So this was all completely foreign to me. But when I went to open my mouth, even to talk, that jet stream of air would come out. It goes up through your nose. And I guess I never really thought of this, but, yeah, all the holes are kind of connected. So I went to talk and I just heard it was the air that was being shot at my nose coming out of my mouth. I kind of felt like a superhero, some sort of, like,

On Today’s Show:

Introduction

0:00.000

Back To The Sleep Clinic

1:19.135

A Chris Chan Call From Prison

3:32.019

A Couple Having Loud Bush Sex

8:28.996

A Family Friendly Segment: Let’s Learn Our ABCs

10:41.854

Indian Singer Uses The N Word. Is That OK?

14:59.099

French Canadian Woman Has A Problem With Asians

17:44.250

Angry Voicemail Feed Back Over Asian News Anchor Talking About Dumplings

19:18.063

Support DV And Get Exclusive Content

22:39.776

Pabst Wants Us All To Eat Ass

24:04.411

Lickable TV Screens

28:56.065

Another Inflight Temper Tantrum

34:06.556

Voicemails / Ending

38:45.951

 

Voicemail: 206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) 

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QUICK AND DIRTY TRANSCRIPT

Tim Henson:Breaks it’s Wednesday, January 5, 2022 Coming up on the program today, which beer brand is highly encouraging you to give rim jobs this month. Plus, I’m sick and tired of Asians bragging about their dumplings. Chris Chan calls from prison and the future of television is a lickable flavorful, flat screen. Distorted View Daily proudly presents great moments in gay sex. Oh, fuck

Tim Henson:the Distorted View show with Tim Hanson. The guy he’s in the dirty underwear or something. I don’t know. He’s never freak. I want to come while I eat your smelly, hairy, wet pussy. I just want to say, how dare you. Yes, dimension back here with you for the Wednesday show. Got a great program real quick before we get into audio short programming notes. Tomorrow’s show may be delayed or postponed because, yes, I got to go back and do another sleep study. They called and they thought it would be a good idea to do it as soon as possible because get this, I won’t have to take another COVID test because COVID tests are good for two weeks. Isn’t that the stupidest shit you’ve ever heard? A lot can go down in two weeks, right? I could get a covid test test negative, then go on a Carnival cruise and swing by Wuhan China fucking ground zero for Covet, then come back and take my sleep study all within a two week span. You know what I’m saying? Don’t get me wrong. I’m glad I don’t have to take another COVID test because I don’t want to jam that fucking swab up my nostril. But this idea that you’re like, after you take a test, you’re immune for two weeks is silly. I told you guys during my last sleep study, I had trouble sleeping. I only slept like 2 hours or something like that. So they prescribed some ambient. I’m going to be knocked the fuck out. I’m kind of looking forward to that. I’ll let you guys know how it all goes. The nurse on the phone today was telling me, even after I do this study, they will order the CPAP machine if I need it.

On Today’s Show:

Introduction

0:00.000

Glad To Be Back! / Christmas Recap

3:16.739

My Sleep Study Was A Disaster

6:28.750

New Ways To Get The Exclusive DV Content

14:03.583

A Very Meade Skelton New Years!

21:16.988

Neckbeard Is Still Missing His Anime Pillow Girlfriend

29:39.869

America’s Methed Out Princess Is Back For 2022

30:57.592

Galileo 2333 Has Another Pedo Theory

32:19.006

Sign Up For The Sideshow And Support DV!

34:29.166

When The Next Door Neighbor Whacks Off To Loudly

34:45.758

The Adult Diaper Trickster Is Back At It

39:06.050

A Psycho Squirrel’s 48 Hour Massacre

42:23.741

Voicemails: 206-666-4463 / Ending

46:58.090

Voicemail: 206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) 

Have Your Voicemail Played On The Show E-mail: [email protected] – Say hi, suggest news stories, videos, audio, etc. Discord: The DV discord server! Chat with like-minded monsters. The DV Subreddit: Share links to DV worthy audio/video and news stories

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Distorted Review 2021 (PART 3)

Voicemail: 206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) 

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Distorted Review 2021 (PART 2)

I Introduce You To Bean Porn

Listening To Child Predators Try To Get Dates On A Phone Service

When Mother Natures Gets Horny

The Origins Of Gotta Go Flamingo (Insensitive Reenactment)

Meade Shares His Tale Of Young Love And Restraining Orders

The Horrible Sounds Of a 2000 Episode Of Distorted View

Voicemail: 206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) 

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Distorted Review 2021 (PART 1)

Introducing AI Tim Henson Talking To A Family Vacationing In A Vagina RIP Child Predator/Crazy Person John Bulla Saint Fudgie Krinkles Bullying Plants / Tim Has A Therapy Breakthrough Glass Shards In Hot Pockets I Try To Become A Sigma Male Meade Skelton’s Man-Crush On A Lush-Haired Youtuber

Voicemail: 206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) 

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On Today’s Show:

Merry Christmas, Freaks! Let creepy uncle Tim read you the Distorted Viewified Version of Twas The Night Before Christmas

Voicemail: 206-666-4463 (206-66-OH GOD) 

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