Doing Relationships Right

Wishing you could live your life and love again, even though your partner died?

Does this sound familiar--

People keep telling you how "strong you are."

You feel stuck in your grief and don't want to stay there- feel like it's never going to end?

You want to believe a better future is feasible, but it's unimaginable without your person?

My guest, Krista St-Germain, knows grief all too well.

When Krista St-Germain lost her husband to a drunk driver, she was shattered. All of her dreams had included him; she desperately wanted to believe she could still have a happy, fulfilling life but wasn't sure how.

Then, she began to research grief, trauma and healing extensively. Krista studied cognitive behavioral coaching and read every book she could find. She combined what she learned about Post Traumatic Growth with cognitive science-based coaching tools and figured out how to turn her loss into a strategy for growth.

I barely made it through our conversation, trying to be as empathetic as possible but not capable of fully understanding the pain Krista endured. We spoke about HOW to talk about death, why we have such difficulty expressing ourselves on the topic, and how to overcome our fears.

This episode is not only for grieving the loss of a loved one but for ALL of us to learn how to cope and be more understanding when people we care about might be grieving. What an essential conversation around a topic that I know I have a tough time talking about- and so many others.

Thank you, Krista, for sharing your story and creating a safe space for me to ask the "strange and uncomfortable" questions surrounding death and grief that I've always felt so awkward asking. You are a brave (and yes, strong!) woman.

xo j

Get my FREE NON-negotiables collab with my sponsor SOBERLINK by clicking HERE!

Here's the link to my Online Dating Course: DOING DATING RIGHT!

Join the Facebook Group and leave a question for a future episode: https://www.facebook.com/groups/doingdivorcerightpodcast

Where to find me:

Website: https://jenniferhurvitz.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenniferhurvitzbiz/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doingrelationshipsright/

Youtube: CLICK HERE ♥️

TikTok: CLICK HERE!

Pinterest: click here!

You can connect with my editor, Next Level Podcast Solutions, at https://nextleveluniverse.com/

Get a copy of Jen's book, "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: A Divorce Coach's Guide to Staying Married" here.

Show notes:

[2:12] Krista's story

[8:04] The myths about grief

[17:53] Check out this excellent parenting tool: Soberlink (https://www.soberlink.com/partners/drr)

[18:57] Grief and dating

[20:53] The Widowed Mom Podcast

[26:40] Defense mechanism from grief

[29:26] Krista's How to Navigate Grief free course

[31:05] Moms Goes On coaching program

[31:27] What's the best thing to say to people who have just lost a loved one?

[33:40] Difference between grief after losing someone suddenly vs. being able to say goodbye

Let's cut the bullshit, shall we?

Enough is enough- dating can be frustrating enough without all the additional games. I'm a COACH, and even I'm baffled by what's going on in the dating scene! LOL!

But I do know this if you are perplexed and anxious or unsure what the hell is going on-- it's not the right person!

Listen now to Doing Relationships Right Just Jen as we unpack this and much, much more.

Here's the link to my Online Dating Course: DOING DATING RIGHT!

Join the Facebook Group and leave a question for a future episode: https://www.facebook.com/groups/doingdivorcerightpodcast

Where to find me:

Website: https://jenniferhurvitz.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenniferhurvitzbiz/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doingrelationshipsright/

Youtube: CLICK HERE ♥️

TikTok: CLICK HERE!

Pinterest: click here!

You can connect with my editor, Next Level Podcast Solutions, at https://nextleveluniverse.com/

Get a copy of Jen's book, "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: A Divorce Coach's Guide to Staying Married" here.

Show notes:

[2:14] There's a fine line

[3:40] If you're confused, anxious, or frustrated—it's not the right person

[6:55] Ask yourself: Does it make me feel good?

Are you physically and emotionally burned out? You are spent by all you have to do in a 12-hour day; can't wait to get to the weekend? By Tuesday, are you wishing it was FRIDAY? Ugh. Well, Joe Sanok has thought of the remedy for it all! "Think about it. We keep inventing things to save us time, yet in most cases, we're just cramming more' time savers' into 24 hours, instead of freeing up more time for personal discovery and life balance." This is where Joe comes in- Joe Sanok is the author of "Thursday is the New Friday: How to work fewer hours, make more money, and spend time doing what you want." It examines how the four-day workweek boosts creativity and productivity. Joe is featured on Forbes, GOOD Magazine, and The Smart Passive Income Podcast. He hosts the popular The Practice of the Practice Podcast, which is recognized as one of the Top 50 Podcasts worldwide, with over 100,000 downloads each month. Bestselling authors, experts, scholars, and business leaders and innovators are featured and interviewed in the 550 plus podcasts he has done over the last six years. We talk about taking control of your schedule, workload, and overall mental health to create the opportunity to do what you WANT and NEED. I loved this conversation and can't wait for you to hear it! Thank you, Joe, for sharing YOUR time and incredible energy with my listeners.

Joe Sanok helps private practitioners to find innovative ways to start, grow, and scale a private practice. For resources, go to: http://www.practiceofthepractice.com/resources

Grab a copy of Thursday is the New Friday here.

Connect with Joe at:

Website(s): www.joesanok.com

www.practiceofthepractice.com

LinkedIn

IG: @practiceofthepractice

Twitter: @OfThePractice

Listen to his podcast: https://thursdayisthenewfriday.libsyn.com/

Get my FREE NON-negotiables collab with my sponsor SOBERLINK by clicking HERE!

Here's the link to my Online Dating Course: DOING DATING RIGHT!

Join the Facebook Group and leave a question for a future episode: https://www.facebook.com/groups/doingdivorcerightpodcast

Where to find me:

Website: https://jenniferhurvitz.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenniferhurvitzbiz/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doingrelationshipsright/

Youtube: CLICK HERE ♥️

TikTok: CLICK HERE!

Pinterest: click here!

You can connect with my editor, Next Level Podcast Solutions, at https://nextleveluniverse.com/

Get a copy of Jen's book, "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: A Divorce Coach's Guide to Staying Married" here.

Show notes:

[4:25] Thursday is the New Friday

[9:33] Why we overvalue work and undervalue fun

[14:12] What is the flow state?

[15:49] Check out this excellent parenting tool: Soberlink (https://www.soberlink.com/partners/drr)

[17:22] The importance of setting firm micro-boundaries

[25:01] Saying no to one thing means saying yes to other things

[27:54] Where to find Joe

[28:42] Joe's big tidbit of wisdom

[30:43] Outro

Relationships are never easy but even more challenging to navigate when yours is under a microscope. Did I ask for it this way? Yes. I made a career out of my divorce- so it was MY decision. But when I met my boyfriend, Jim, I'm not quite sure HE came fully prepared for the "lime-light."

It's been an incredible five years, with high-highs and low-lows- like most couples; we have had our fair share of "shit." But Covid tested us; my auto-immune disease, close quarters, it all took its toll.

And last November, I ended things, and we were both wrecked.

Why am I sharing all this? Being vulnerable is what I preach, so I felt it was essential to practice it. And after some time apart (and some work), Jim and I got back together. Even coaches need coaching, y'all! I'm good at helping other people and their relationships, but why couldn't I figure out my own? Frustrating, right?

Wrong. It's okay. It's okay to be vulnerable, to need help from others...to do the work and get back together when you have a solid foundation worth fighting for. We do. And we are here to share our journey and struggles- so we can help others do the same.

Please be kind. It wasn't easy; I've asked a lot from Jim. He's putting himself out there, and while we LOVE to laugh (it's our favorite thing to do), it was tough to lay all our shit on the table.

Please, WATCH THE VIDEO VERSION on YOUTUBE! It's so good. You get to see our faces and expressions, which is best if you ask me. You're not, but I'm telling you anyway! Haha.

Love you all, and we appreciate any POSITIVE FEEDBACK you have for us. I will delete negative comments. No one should be judging- this took a whole lot of chutzpah. Thank you, Jim Healey, for taking the time for my listeners and me, for taking my "coaching," and loving me when I broke your heart. I promise never to do it again.

Peace, love, and truth

xo jennifer

Get my FREE NON-negotiables collab with my sponsor SOBERLINK by clicking HERE!

Here's the link to my Online Dating Course: DOING DATING RIGHT!

Join the Facebook Group and leave a question for a future episode: https://www.facebook.com/groups/doingdivorcerightpodcast

Where to find me:

Website: https://jenniferhurvitz.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenniferhurvitzbiz/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doingrelationshipsright/

Youtube: CLICK HERE ♥️

TikTok: CLICK HERE!

Pinterest: click here!

You can connect with my editor, Next Level Podcast Solutions, at https://nextleveluniverse.com/

Get a copy of Jen's book, "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: A Divorce Coach's Guide to Staying Married" here.

Show notes:

[2:35] Exciting summer-episode related announcement

[3:55] What happened to Jim and me?

[6:15] Even coaches need coaching

[9:33] Our different communication styles

[11:19] Problems with resolving conflicts

[14:48] Check out this excellent parenting tool: Soberlink (https://www.soberlink.com/partners/drr)

[16:18] Toxic positivity

[19:38] On being anxious

[20:57] The "what-if" stage

[22:22] On feeling exhausted

[23:55] The safe space

Oftentimes, we think certain "practices" in our relationships are bad, or toxic...but are they really? Sure, there are the obvious ones: lying, lack of trust, constant judgment, a hostile environment. But what about the less evident?

In this episode, let me debunk some of the familiar habits that some consider unhealthy in a relationship. I think you might be surprised by some on my list!

After you listen, hop on over to my PRIVATE FB group and let give me your feedback! I'd love to hear what you think!

xo j

Here's the link to my Online Dating Course: DOING DATING RIGHT!

Join the Facebook Group and leave a question for a future episode: https://www.facebook.com/groups/doingdivorcerightpodcast

Where to find me:

Website: https://jenniferhurvitz.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenniferhurvitzbiz/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doingrelationshipsright/

Youtube: CLICK HERE ♥️

TikTok: CLICK HERE!

Pinterest: click here!

You can connect with my editor, Next Level Podcast Solutions, at https://nextleveluniverse.com/

Get a copy of Jen's book, "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: A Divorce Coach's Guide to Staying Married" here.

Show notes:

[2:06] You go to bed angry

[3:19] You or your partner get attracted to someone else

[5:06] You're not always in love with your partner

[6:08] You shouldn't have to change or compromise

[7:15] You fight all the time

[10:15] Tip: have a safe word

[10:47] It's normal

[13:31] Mrs2Me Summit on March 25 - 27, 2022

Are you dating after divorce? Tough.

Are you dating after divorce WITH the baggage from your previous relationship? Ugh. Don't even get me started.

My guest today is Author, Speaker, and Transformation Coach Tonya Carter who talks about reinventing yourself after divorce, what she does, and how she helps her clients with her strategies so they can manage their relationships in life, work, and business.

Tonya is a certified speaker, transformation coach, author, and podcast host who works with women to discover their voice, build themselves from the inside out, become leaders in their homes, and find their life's purpose.

Being a single mother of two, Tonya realized that she allowed her circumstances to hold her from discovering her true life's purpose. Experiencing divorce, five job losses in four years, unhealthy relationships, financial hardships, health setbacks, and balancing single motherhood took its toll mentally, emotionally, financially & physically. She decided to stop being the victim and became the victor of her life, and she wants the same for other women.

As a certified consultant, Tonya works with women entrepreneurs to discover their inner genius, create an environment for others on their team to develop a win/win, and use the best communication tactics that manage others to form successful team building and performance.

Tonya has written a book titled "Divorce Your Story: A Woman's Guide to Heal & Thrive after Divorce" and also facilitates a 12-week T.H.R.I.V.E Program that walks women through the process of uncoupling by providing support, advice, resources, and tools that will help mitigate interruptions in their business, work performance, and household obligations. And has a podcast called The Reinvent U Podcast, which focuses on mindset, emotions, finances, health, faith, and building meaningful relationships to become the best version of themselves in their personal & professional lives.

Thank you, Tonya, for joining me again on Doing Relationships Right!

Connect with Tonya at:

Website: https://www.tonyacarter.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mstonyacarter/

FB: https://www.facebook.com/mstonyaspeaks/

IG: https://www.instagram.com/mstonyaspeaks/

YT: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCyWknAeYLmdbWdMfGcP0tiA?view_as=subscriber

Grab a copy of Divorce Your Story: https://www.divorceyourstorybook.com/

Listen to her podcast, The Reinvent U Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-reinvent-u-podcast/id1493902249

Get my FREE NON-negotiables collab with my sponsor SOBERLINK by clicking HERE!

Here's the link to my Online Dating Course: DOING DATING RIGHT!

Join the Facebook Group and leave a question for a future episode: https://www.facebook.com/groups/doingdivorcerightpodcast

Where to find me:

Website: https://jenniferhurvitz.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenniferhurvitzbiz/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doingrelationshipsright/

Youtube: CLICK HERE ♥️

TikTok: CLICK HERE!

Pinterest: click here!

You can connect with my editor, Next Level Podcast Solutions, at https://nextleveluniverse.com/

Get a copy of Jen's book, "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: A Divorce Coach's Guide to Staying Married" here.

Show notes:

[2:24] More about Tonya and her story

[5:08] How he helps her clients

[8:59] You cannot date without getting divorced from your story

[12:52] Check out this excellent parenting tool: Soberlink (https://www.soberlink.com/partners/drr)

[13:52] Does she think that men are too quick to move into new relationships?

[19:00] Mrs. to Me Summit on March 25 - 27, 2022

[19:37] Her book, podcast, and mini-course

[24:07] Outro

WE LIVED IT, SO WE GET IT! Yes, yes, and YES!!

You have to go through a divorce to completely understand it!

And today, I have the incredible ladies from exEXPERTS, T.H. Irwin and Jessica Klingbaum! And just like me, Jessica and T.H. have been through divorce and lived to tell about it- the good, the horrible...and the WTF is going on! I wrote books about my experiences, and they BUILT A WEBSITE AND ONLINE MECCA! Find everything you need to know about the legal process, your kids, your money, dating advice, and beyond! They have it all, and it's FREE.

Y'all, please, if you're going through, thinking about, or are recently divorced- go check out exEXPERTS for everything you'll need to SURVIVE AND THRIVE throughout the process.

Thank you, ladies, for joining me on Doing Relationships Right and talking about All Things Divorce- I think we just about covered everything!

Connect with them at: Website: https://exexperts.com/

FB: https://www.facebook.com/exExperts

IG: https://www.instagram.com/exEXPERTS/

YT: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZhug0U2OaOzQvgjiU4n8Vg

Listen to their podcast, Divorce etc… at: https://exexperts.com/thepodcast/

Get my FREE NON-negotiables collab with my sponsor SOBERLINK by clicking HERE!

Here's the link to my Online Dating Course: DOING DATING RIGHT!

Join the Facebook Group and leave a question for a future episode: https://www.facebook.com/groups/doingdivorcerightpodcast

Where to find me:

Website: https://jenniferhurvitz.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenniferhurvitzbiz/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doingrelationshipsright/

Youtube: CLICK HERE ♥️

TikTok: CLICK HERE!

Pinterest: click here!

You can connect with my editor, Next Level Podcast Solutions, at https://nextleveluniverse.com/

Get a copy of Jen's book, "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: A Divorce Coach's Guide to Staying Married" here.

Show notes:

[2:27] How they started

[10:46] What is exEXPERTS?

[16:23] Check out this excellent parenting tool: Soberlink (https://www.soberlink.com/partners/drr)

[18:08] Building a community

[20:27] The inner circle

[22:17] The newsletter

[25:18] Going through a divorce

[28:04] Where to find them

"But we are in love, so there's that."

Umm..we've heard this time and time again. And as a relationship coach, I'm calling BS! Listen as we dive in and discuss what really matters for a long, healthy partnership.

Here's the link to my Online Dating Course: DOING DATING RIGHT!

Join the Facebook Group and leave a question for a future episode: https://www.facebook.com/groups/doingdivorcerightpodcast

Where to find me:

Website: https://jenniferhurvitz.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenniferhurvitzbiz/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doingrelationshipsright/

Youtube: CLICK HERE ♥️

TikTok: CLICK HERE!

Pinterest: click here!

You can connect with my editor, Next Level Podcast Solutions, at https://nextleveluniverse.com/

Get a copy of Jen's book, "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: A Divorce Coach's Guide to Staying Married" here.

Show notes: [4:14] Is love enough to make a relationship successful? [6:26] Deep, mutual respect [7:10] Kindness [8:59] Communication—talk to each other openly [10:42] Trust and honesty [12:24] Empathy

It's difficult living with known traumas, going through them every single day, and trying to heal from them. How much more when you have to go through your life with unidentified trauma?

In this episode, we're going deep into childhood traumas and how it affects your relationships with our guest, Lindsey Ellison. She is an author, speaker, relationship coach, and fellow podcaster… yey! We talk about childhood trauma, how it manifests in your relationships, how you can address it, and how you can finally heal from it.

Lindsey Ellison is an author, a relationship coach, and founder of Start Over Coaching, Inc. She specializes in helping people break free from narcissistic abuse, navigate their divorce or break-up, and find happiness and peace.

Originally stemming from her own personal experiences, Lindsey's mission is to inspire you to make those amazing changes in your life to help you start over and find happiness. She takes you from victim to victor.

Reach out to Lindsey at:

Website: https://lindseyellison.com/

FB: https://www.facebook.com/ThriveWithLindsey/

Twitter:https://twitter.com/startovercoach

IG: https://www.instagram.com/lindsey_ellison/

Access her online course: https://breakfreefromyournarcissist.com/

Get her book at: https://www.amazon.com/Lindsey-Ellison/e/B07KYVWPHS

Get my FREE NON-negotiables collab with my sponsor SOBERLINK by clicking HERE!

Here's the link to my Online Dating Course: DOING DATING RIGHT!

Join the Facebook Group and leave a question for a future episode: https://www.facebook.com/groups/doingdivorcerightpodcast

Where to find me:

Website: https://jenniferhurvitz.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenniferhurvitzbiz/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doingrelationshipsright/

Youtube: CLICK HERE ♥️

TikTok: CLICK HERE!

Pinterest: click here!

You can connect with my editor, Next Level Podcast Solutions, at https://nextleveluniverse.com/

Get a copy of Jen's book, "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: A Divorce Coach's Guide to Staying Married" here.

Show notes:

[2:11] More about Lindsey

[13:11] What exactly is childhood trauma?

[16:30] What to do when you have childhood trauma

[21:51] Hypervigilance

[25:18] Look at the behavior

[26:40] Check out this excellent parenting tool: Soberlink (https://www.soberlink.com/partners/drr)

[28:52] Hyper parenting and co-dependency

[36:11] Nascent reasoning

[42:42] Childhood trauma and relationships

[46:56] Love avoidants and love addicts

What does having accountability in a relationship mean? Why do some people in any kind of relationship don't have that?

Today, we're going to talk about accountability and attachment styles with our guest, fellow podcaster, Melissa Bright, as she shares more about her podcast, her life, and her personal experience about taking responsibility in her relationships.

Melissa is the host of The Bright Side of Life podcast that aims to help others overcome depression, anxiety, loneliness, and stress through a mindset shift. Her podcast helps you deal with everyday worry, self-doubt, self-worth, and so much more.

Learn more about Melissa and her podcast here:

Web: https://www.thebrightsideoflifepodcast.com/

IG: https://www.instagram.com/the.bright.side.of.life_/

FB: https://web.facebook.com/groups/1992892244168224

Get my FREE NON-negotiables collab with my sponsor SOBERLINK by clicking HERE!

Here's the link to my Online Dating Course: DOING DATING RIGHT!

Join the Facebook Group and leave a question for a future episode: https://www.facebook.com/groups/doingdivorcerightpodcast

Where to find me:

Website: https://jenniferhurvitz.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenniferhurvitzbiz/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doingrelationshipsright/

Youtube: CLICK HERE ♥️

TikTok: CLICK HERE!

Pinterest: click here!

You can connect with my editor, Next Level Podcast Solutions, at https://nextleveluniverse.com/

Get a copy of Jen's book, "Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: A Divorce Coach's Guide to Staying Married" here.

Show notes:

[3:04] How did Melissa start her podcast

[5:52] Melissa's fitness journey

[8:35] Accountability in relationships

[17:53] Check out this excellent parenting tool: Soberlink (https://www.soberlink.com/partners/drr)

[25:52] Attachment styles

[28:03 Her podcast consultation and coaching

[30:49] Where to find Melissa