Gumball Love Podcast

EP 150: Why He Texts but doesn't Make Plans...and Why You're Chasing Him.


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He Texts But Makes No Plans:

You had the perfect date. Amazing chemistry. Real connection. Then... he disappears into texting limbo. Good morning texts, funny memes, late-night calls—but never "When can I see you again?"

If you've ever felt crazy trying to decode why a guy stays in constant contact but won't make plans, this episode will finally make it all make sense.

In this episode, I break down:

  • Why "if he wanted to he would" is incomplete advice that keeps you stuck
  • How texting without plans becomes transactional (quarters and gumballs)
  • Why all that standard advice (play hard to get, mirror his energy, be unbothered) actually makes it worse
  • The neuroscience behind why he stays close but keeps his distance
  • What girlfriend benefits with pen pal effort really means
  • Why this pattern proves he's actually into you—but lacks the capacity to bond
  • The difference between dopamine-driven pursuit and oxytocin-based bonding

This isn't about you not being desirable enough. If anything, the real intimacy with you feels so intense that he needs the distance to manage his fear. I'll show you how to spot the Chase Me pattern, why shrinking yourself will never work, and what emotionally available men actually do differently.

Stop performing. Stop trying to decode his mixed signals. Start understanding that his confusion is about his capacity, not your worth.

Ready to identify your guy's gumball pattern? Take the free quiz at GumballLove.com and book your one-time free coaching call for a personalized analysis. Find Melissa on Instagram: @melissajaneroberts

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Gumball Love PodcastBy Melissa Roberts

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